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Tell Dates About My Handicap

I get alot of responses..from my pic's. I have a slight limp when I walk from a situation that had happened. Now should I reveal that to my date before we meet for a date? Or is it not a big deal...appreciate your responses. Sis Debbie

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 ---Debbie on 4/4/05
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Yes, please tell the person about your disability before they see you. If the person want to date you or like you they will like you with whatever your disability is. Plus, if that one person turn you down, it's because it was not in the will of God for you to meet or be together. There is someone for everyone. One person leave and two or three others come. Stand strong and be proud of your limp and think about the person who don't have a leg and wish they had a limp.
---Alice on 3/16/08


I would tell them before hand, so that I could save alot of valuable time. If the person is God sent, it will not be a problem. If not, it may be an issue, and he will most likely move along.
---G. on 5/28/07


Honesty is part of a Christian's witness. If you carry the name of Christian, you know what you should do. Why start a relationship on a lie. It will only hurt you in the end. Looks are not enough to hold a man. If you tell the truth, that could be the key to holding the relationship together. If it is meant to be.
---Robyn on 5/28/07


We all have disabilities of one kind or another, you have a limp so what! This should not be a barrier to a friendship unless the person is very shallow.
---margaret on 5/28/07


No, I didn't think that you should tell them because if they like you as a person, you shouldn't have to tell them unless after being productive in the relationship to the point of having a future.
---Devona on 5/28/07




I wholly agree, it is best to be honest about everything. I knew a woman who's husband didn't know her true age, and she worried all the time about what he'd do if he found out! Even seemingly simple things like that, can wreak havoc in one's mind later on. You always know you lied, either by omission or commission. Not good.
---Kristine on 5/11/05


There is certainly a time for everything, but I appreciated the thought that you shouldn't let yourself be a victim. On the other hand as a friendship develops and you realize that the other may be thinking of you as a potential mate, then I believe it right that we do share those disabilities, handicaps, past experiences, that may affect the other and the decisions they have to make. Marriage is the closest relationship two human beings can know. It is absolutely vital that leading up to this there should be honesty, openness, and respect for the needs, desires, and hopes of the other.
---Wayne on 4/9/05


Sure, why not tell them. I would not care about this if I was a guy and wanted to meet you. If you can mention it casually in the conversation before you meet, why not?!
---sue on 4/9/05


I also am single and looking I would tell them. because you want them to accepet you as you are.
---alicia on 4/7/05


I have a number of handicaps, and though I'm not dating, I would definitely tell the person of my status. I believe in becoming friends first, being truthful, and if the person is sincere, they will accept you as you are. To the right person, a God-loving and empathetic person, your limp won't matter a bit. It may even be a way of weeding out the wheat from the chaff!
---Kristine on 4/6/05




I see you want to be just as honest as you can. Interest is generated through the pic's and if that is the way you are going about it, there may be no other way than to say your handicap since you want to reveal the truth.
---gregg on 4/6/05


Sis Debbie, Take it from a guy. Tell him. If he is turned off, then you wouldn't want to be with him anyway, right? This way your saving yourself a lot of time and grief, and can move on with what God really wants in your life. God bless.
---John on 4/6/05


If the relationship has reach the point of a meeting then i feel you should tell him. If he is a good man then any disabilities will not bother him. If your not honest he could see that as a way to end the friendship. God made us all different ans some people can except anything and others cant. Be honest
---Roy on 4/6/05


I would say it all depends on if this is the man that God has for you and if he has allowed him to find you, then yes you should tell him, i have cerebral palsy and i walk with a limp too but that hasn't stopped me from being content with God and waiting for the right man or no man at all
---michelle on 4/5/05


Play it by ear. If you two are talking about serious matters and an opportunity arises to share about this, then go for it. If it's the man God has for you he won't be turned by it. For me, my past was the issue. One man I dated very briefly and was happy I didn't say anything, but when Mr. Right came along I found myself telling him the first week we were dating. It just depends on the circumstance. You'll know in your heart when it's the right time to tell him. Don't worry, it will all work out according to God's plan if you let him lead.
---Katie on 4/5/05


Becky S I liked what you said about if she tells everyone she has a limp she becomes the limp. There is far more to you and who you are IN Christ than a limp. I saw a woman on montel a while ago that used only her feet to do everything Dress herself comb her hair do make up DRIVE a car take care of and dress her baby cook. She had a husband who loved her. Do not become a victim. Forgive whatever caused th limp and love others the way you want to be loved.
---becky on 4/5/05


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Alice, I have to disagree with you. Who's business is it but her own if she has a limp? If she goes around telling everyone she has a limp, she BECOMES the limp. She will feel as if she is less than other women because God blessed her (yes, I said blessed) with a limp. That's like saying "excuse me, I have freckles, will you still love me?" Who cares? I hope this made sense.
---Becky_S on 4/5/05


No I don't think I would, because it's really not a big deal. you will have different re-actions, but don't let those who act like it is a big deal bother you.
---a_friend on 4/5/05


Dear Sis Debbie, Don't you even worry about the limp. Your making too much of a big deal over it. The Lord has a unique way of intervening in our lives. I pray that He brings the right one into your life. If the woman that I'm in love with was in a wheelchair I would love her and cherish her for the rest of my life if just given the opportunity. I didn't realize this until I fell in love. There is a big differance in loving someone and falling in love. You'll know the differance if it happens to you. You won't need to second guess, you'll know.
---John on 4/4/05


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