What Am I Doing Wrong In Dating
I'm a single 33 years old male who is still single. I'm on 3 different single sites for over a year or more and I haven't had any real success. All I keep getting are women who seem interested in the beginning, but then she loses interests after awhile. What am I doing wrong?
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---Eddie on 4/23/05
Helpful Blog Vote (11)
Lawrence: don't feel the lady did you wrong. It was just one of those things. Her manners were just ill. A good thing she went on with someone else. Just as her manners were lacking, there were probably other areas in her life that were just as ill. And would have been a put off to you. Those things just happen. The timing was not right. You do have to be patient. Believe me you will know and the lady will,too, when you meet the right one. Eveything will look right and feel right. You won
t have to push or force anything. It works almost like magic. Blessings
---Robyn on 8/16/10|
I thot I had some one. She's 62, we talked - dated 8 - 10 months, she lived 50 mi's away (there was No commitments as of yet), going out to eat, went shopping, visited some of her family. Was making plans for her to visit with my daughters. On a Fri - night I called her no reply, Sat - morn I called I called again no reply. Sat - aft - noon I called she answered.
She said I need to talk to you & said, an ole child hood school sweetie came calling & it may not be anything there for me. I told her to call me & let me know what is what, that was 3 weeks this past Saturday & she has Not called. I feel like she done me wrong by Not calling me to let me know. I believe the ole saying, what goes around comes around.
---Lawrence on 8/9/10|
To Lawrence: You are 62 yrs old and have not found a mate. Why don't you just settle and take who you can? Find a nice older lady with not that many demands and settle down. There is not much left after 60. What are you waiting on?
---Robyn on 8/7/10|
Get on your knees and talk to the Lord about it --first. Then quit hiding behind that computer. Find a nice christian lady at your church--to ask out. Go to a nice safe place. For yourself as well as her. Hiding behind a computer is very devious and risky. Brush up on your manners and conversational skills. Don't be too stingy. Relax and have a good time. You may not have a great response,right away but do be patient. Be honest and real. But not desperate. And do act like a Christian. This is where a lot of men and women make their mistake. They profess to be saved and then act like lucifer,himself. Sometimes worse. Our actions must match what we say(testimony). Or we risk being labeled liars and hypocrites.
---Robyn on 8/6/10|
It may just be that God is still waiting, for His own reasons, to give you a wife later. Anyway, you can not be sure that God will have all men marry - remember Paul
---peter3594 on 3/9/10|
I would like to share with you that God does not use our knowledge & idea in giving us the good thing we need. God uses His own plan. We are most of the time disturbed by what the society expects of/taught us. Are you a surrendered Christian? Check Heb.10:35-36. Stop self-searching for a life-mate. God has 1 already chosen for you if you believe it and HE will lead you to the person in due time. To receive His own choice for you please remove all worldly ideas of how-to-find-a-mate and keep discussing/talking it with the Lord sincerely. God is your Father, if u trust & totally depend on HIM, you will receive peacefully though people may afflict/ridicule you much before you receive from God.
---Adetunji on 11/5/09|
I'm an almost 62 yr old male. From here & other diff dating sites I get emails from Gal's from the ages 25-45 looking for a sugar-daddy. I think the reason is why I haven't found any Gal is because I'm Not ate up with worldly pleasures(missing Church, sports, social drinks, movies, dancing etc)seems like that many are doing. Bible tells me here, 1st John 2 v 15-16.
I hope to be patient & wait.
---Lawrence on 11/5/09|
Have you found someone yet?
---Theresa on 11/5/09|
I wish I knew. You are one of many christian men who fall into that category. I'm in a church singles group with many male and female christian friends, but while we are all good enough to be trusted friends, no one ever hooks up. It's confusing. Maybe the world has infiltrated this arena and muddied the waters of what marriage and commitment are suppose to be.
---Chris on 2/17/08|
Marie::The things of this world that glitter & glow presenting pictures of joy, are earthly & temporary.What you have, is everlasting, Jesus loves those who He desires to be celibate its a special honour remember the saying "Many are called But few are chosen"count yourself as the few.There are many like you in the days of the OT girls would dedicate themselves to God& remain Virgins.I am sorry you feel discouraged.
---Emcee on 1/2/07|
You are still young! God bless you, take your time, live your life and have fun and before you know it, you'll meet somebody!
---sue on 1/2/07|
Hello Eddie Fast Eddie;;At 33 you are straining at the leash & are seeking a quick fix.A bad choice of words but true.Every thing good, comes to those Who wait & pray.I give you a saying:-
With Patience Bide,
Heaven will provide
The fitting time
The fitting Guide.
---Emcee on 1/2/07|
hello i have read and understand what you mean i want to become a memeber.
---iloka2007 on 1/2/07|
You are right to question being single I wouldnt accept the trite answers that mention verses to comfort you. I am 49 and have prayed since I was 19 for a mate. I have done all I was suppose to do. Live for the Lord, prayer, read my bible and put my mind on things above. Please dont limit yourself to just these things. I have regrets that for a period of 10 yrs that was all I did. I let the guilt of the christian community limit my access to other singles. At this age it is discouraging.
---Marie on 9/21/05|
I can understand what you are going thru, i went on multiple sites too and am still single at 34, no kids, good job, etc, i just want a hardworking, good christian man, sometimes i wonder about online dating if they work at all, have seen no signs, so i can understand and i ask myself the same question, what am i doing wrong.
---schola on 5/11/05|
Hi Eddie, I don't believe that you are doing something wrong on this sites. You are only 33 years of age and have so much to look forward in life. When it's time for you to be BLESS from our father you will be. When our father knows the time for you to meet the person that he wants you to spend your whole life with then Patient(awaiting)is what you have to have..He can see into the future clearly just as we can see in our past.God will bless you in time.Ask our father to bless you, but never ask him why he hasn't...Silva 8589
---silva on 5/1/05|
read some books on dating and marriage relationships. try the Christian bookstore first. there is one, the five love languages of ..... men, of women, of God. that is a good place to start.
---barb on 4/30/05|
Amy if you like to talk please email me on here at Eddie8467.
---Eddie8467 on 4/27/05|
Eddi, Seek first the kingdom of God, it's fun! Put God first any leave the worrie behind. Find a deeper relationship with God to fill and comfort you. It was God that said "It is not good that man should be alone." God knows just where you are and what you need. He is thinking of you, are you thinking of Him?
---Linda2tk on 4/27/05|
Eddie, do you ask God, why?Try listening for that still, small voice that is God. Again do not assume you are doing anything wrong. Try to learn something from everyone you contact and it will make you a more interesting person. Do you just email them? Or, have you had face to face dates with them? Take a good hard look at yourself and see if you need any changes in grooming, body language, clothing etc. to bring out your best points. Make over yourself if necessary. A girl will give a guy a second or third chance if he presents a good package.
---Nancy on 4/27/05|
hi. i know how you feel. i'm looking for friends & possibly soul mates. i'm 29 & divorced with a daughter. if you want to talk, please email me sometime. amy
---amy on 4/26/05|
Eddie: Thanks for the clarification on your name. It was news to me and very interesting. The Kathy I had in mind for you to contact wrote to you on 4/23. Alan of UK: Thanks to you too for the note about Eddie not being a lady's name. Appreciate it very much.
---Pierre on 4/25/05|
Hi, Eddie I will contact you at your address here. Thanks Pierre for saying I sound like a winner. :) I know the LORD has not brought the special person into my life so that I could concentrate on my studies in college. But do hope that he brings one soon. But like I say It is better to have no man than to have the wrong man. What mercy HE shows in saving me from dealing with the wrong men. Kathy
---Kathy on 4/25/05|
...picking women with short attention spans! (jok'in) Being single or being married can be a problem. To fill time, look at how to deal w/problems since you'd have one wife but will have many problems in life. A most excellent quality in a person is one who knows how to deal w/problems in a godly way. God's purposes behind our problems can be to direct, inspect, correct, protect, and perfect us. The problems I face will either defeat me or develop me-depending on how I respond to them. Don't react foolishy and resent my problems rather pause to consider what benefit they might bring.Rmns15:13
---laura on 4/24/05|
I want to thank everyone for their advice. Pierre: Eddie is short for Eduardo As for getting to know kathy I don't know who she is, but if she or any single ladies 20-34 years old wants to get to know me they can email me here at: eddie8467
---Eddie on 4/24/05|
Pierre ... interesting that you say Eddie looks like a girl's name.
Her in the UK, Eddie is a shortened form of Edward, and is quite common.
We would not here think it was a girl's name.
There is Edie, a girl's name, but ir very uncommon.
Strange how things vary country to country!
---Alan_of_U.K. on 4/24/05|
Hi eddie, just wait upon the Lord, keep on praying and believing on His word. For sure he has prepared someone better for you.that special someone is still in the process and when she is ready and mature enough the Lord will give her to you according to your prayers. always "delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. 33 yrs. old is still young for a guy...don't worry instead put all your trust upon the Lord. God bless you...
---geraldine on 4/24/05|
Ecclesiastes says there is a time for eveything under the heavens. A time to love and a time to hate. A time to embrace and time to refrain. God has a schedule for each of His children. I know its painful sometimes, but why don't you try relaxing, being patient and enjoying friendships first? A relationship is based on friendship first is usually enduring. Also, it is unconditional and when the Lord does awaken love( Song of Solomon)when it is time, wow! Its strong!Meanwhile, lets seek first the Kingdom of heaven and His righteousness and all these things He will add unto us!
---cheah on 4/23/05|
Eddie sounds like a lot of good advice from your question and hope that you have faithfully asked the lord in prayer as well to what your desires are. Seek you first the kingdom of heaven and all these things shall be added unto you. Let go and Let God, may sound easy but we all know it is not. Hang in there brother and in all things please Our God and He shall guide and direct your path
---kirk on 4/23/05|
You are still young, do not be in so much of a hurry to find the woman God has in store for you. continue to seek the Lord, He has someone in store for you, do not try to hurry..after all, it is forever..
---Gloria on 4/23/05|
Eddie, depend on Jesus Christ to fulfill your needs right now and always. You will find that Peace that passeth all understanding. In the mean time, get off the internet and go to a large bookstore in the Christian section. Read books for Christain singles. There are some great one. Who knows, you may meet a nice girl there. Start by being friends. Don't overwhelm a woman right off the bat. God is preparing you to be a Godly husband. God Bless you, Gay
---Gay on 4/23/05|
Eddie, I can't say what you are doing wrong without knowing what you are doing! Maybe it's just not God's time and place. I had better luck. I joined a singles site for a 1 month trial. I met my husband there. He however had been a member for over a year.
---Robin on 4/23/05|
Hi, instead of trying to find someone, let the Lord send them to you. Believe me, I am 22 and never dated until about a year or so ago. I have learned from watching mom and dad that if it is not the Lord's will it will not work and you will not be happy. I told myself that I did not want to date or get married unless I knew it was of God. And I just prayed. And last year he sent me the man of my dreams, and we are now enagaged to be married. Just pray, and trust the Lord, let Him send them to you.
God bless, Megan
---Megan on 4/23/05|
The problem is, is that you are looking, stop looking and let that perfect one find you.
---Melissa on 4/23/05|
First: I would get off the internet, join a church sponsored dating group so that you may meet others im person and pray,play,eat etc together. Second: Ask Kathy who wrote to you if you could at least correspond to explore what could be in store for you in a mutual way. She sounds like a winner who is also looking. So, give it a go! If it blossoms we will rejoice with both of you.
PS. You may want to change your first name: "Eddie" looks like a girl's name, may be confusing to some.
---Pierre on 4/23/05|
HI it sounds like you are trying too hard,rest in the Lord, ask him to bring a woman into your life and then wait on his perfect timing. God bless you-
---BARBARA on 4/23/05|
The first thing that comes to mind is that you seem to be putting your hopes on meeting someone online. Yes, it can happen BUT it is the exception not the rule and fraught with DANGER! Even if you "meet" someone. How on earth can you ever hope to get to know them well enough that you are willing to trust your future into their hands? Get out in your community. If you are a Christian, maybe you should consider visiting some neighbouring CHRISTIAN churches.
Try to get a copy of the book BOY MEETS GIRL. It is excellent.
---Bruce5656 on 4/23/05|
It happens to all of us.
Perhaps they are not the girl God has in mind for you?
---Alan_of_U.K. on 4/23/05|
You should Seek the Will of God, for your life. It may be that you need to be Still and see the Salvation of the Lord Manifest in your LIFE. It may be that God, is trying to get YOU to Develop a Deep Relationship him first. You can't find Fullfillment in People only in God! You have to know the Peace of God, and it will Surpass all Understanding. Just Seek him in Prayer and Fasting and find out if the Females are part of GOD Will for your Life at this Season in your LIFE. May the Peace of God be Upon You!
---Renatta on 4/23/05|
I do wish I had a good answer for you. But I can tell you you are not alone. I have done eharmony and several others and have had no luck. I just trust that the Lord will bring the right one at the right time. I'd just be happy with a christian male friend to share time with. I pray GOD delivers you the wife you long for.
---Kathy on 4/23/05|