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My Husband Cheated On Me

I am divorced because my husband cheated on me. What I need to know now is if I can re-marry. When does the bible say it is ok to re-marry and who can I actually marry? I know it will have to be a christian man. I won't settle for less.

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 ---karen on 4/28/05
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i think the answers here are accurate

for those of us here
i will like to say that if the spouse is ready to change and turn away from the behaviour, it will be godly not to press charges but rather forgive because we do not know for sure if the next spouse will not also cheat.

I family member did not forgive her first somewhat repentant husband, had to leave the second when she realised the man was actually married elsewhere but married her with his wife's consent because she had the financial strength that anchored the man's second family and is now locked up in marriage to a third who will not even repent for his adulterous ways...so much trouble for being rich and trusting!!!
---patie3447 on 9/25/09


i think the answers here are accurate

for those of us here
i will like to say that if the spouse is ready to change and turn away from the behaviour, it will be godly not to press charges but rather forgive because we do not know for sure if the next spouse will not also cheat.

A family member did not forgive her first somewhat repentant husband, then had to leave the second when she realised the man was actually married elsewhere but married her with his wife's consent because she had the financial strength that anchored the man's second family and finally is now locked up in marriage to a third who will not even repent for his adulterous ways...so much trouble for being rich and trusting!!!
---patie3447 on 9/25/09


Jesus says that anyone who even looks at another with lust, has already committed adultery in his heart, so how has your husband done anything more than you have or anyone else has? is the act any different than the thought harbored in your heart? as it is the heart that is judged, wont we all have to answer for our adulterous desires? the answer is yes, thats why we were also told to forgive, becasue we have all fallen short of the Glory of God. yes it hurts to have a cheating spouse, but unless you are prepared to forgive, then you are going it on your own, rather than with the help of God. Divorce is a sin of man, it is not from God, but if we seek first His Kingdom, and His Righteousness, then our plans and our marriages will not fail.
---Jake_Wiebe on 9/24/09


"Husbands love your wives, wives obey your husbands". obviously this reference means that you do so in all that in unto The Lord. Jesus says that if we even look at another in lust, we have committed adultery in our hearts, and since it is the heart that is judged, our motives and deeds, lest no man boast, there must be forgiveness. if you have looked at another in lust, then what has your husband done that you havent? read the red writing in your Bible, cant go wrong. then you will know when to remarry. there is no set time, like a mourning period or cleansing period that is specified. help others and seek first The Kingdom of God and His righteousness. Then your questions will be answered.
---jake_wiebe on 9/24/09


Dear Madam. u pray for your husband. i too will pray for him. one day he will definitely come back to you. divorce is not good solution. hope where there is no hope.dawn follows the darkness. belive on Jesus completely
take care
pratap
---Pratap on 9/12/09




Yes it is ok for you to remarry, if you want to. My husband cheated on me multiple times but I only caught him after all the wrong doing. I chose to stay and now HE wants to divorce me because I don't give myself to him as much as he would like....but I can't help but remember what he did and it's hard. Reading the Bible has helped and talking to God. Read Divorce references in the Bible.
---Keyasha on 9/11/09


Jesus prohibited divorce except for adultery, that included lying about ones virginity. The non adulterer could remarry. The adulterer, and anyone marrying one, is entering a prohibited marriage. A divorce without cause, was no divorce, and so, another marriage was a type of bigamy. The exception is in 1Corinthians 7:15. If the unbeliever departs, the Christian can remarry because the marriage was not 'in the Lord'. Matthew 19:9, 1Corinthians 7:27-28 allow remarriage. Titus 2:3-5.
Deuteronomy 22:17-19, 28-29, 24:1-4, Proverbs 2:17 (forsaketh husband), Isaiah 54:4-8, Jeremiah 3:1, Malachi 2:14-16, Matthew 5:31-32, 19:3-12, Mark 10:2-12, Luke 16:18, 1Corinthians 6:15-16, 7:10-17, 27.
---Glenn on 8/17/09


We commit adultery against Jesus, by having relationships with worry and unforgiveness etc. And doesn't He keep taking us back? So, I'd say interpret the scriptures not by what we wish, but what God wants.

Paul says a widow "is happier if she remains as she is, according to my judgment", in 1 Corinthians 7:40. Possibly, this can similarly apply to a divorced person (o: Maybe Paul is saying a guy isn't such a big deal, after all (o: if a widow would be happier staying unmarried.

One other item > I'd check myself to get wise to anything still in me which helped get me married to a cheater and then get a divorce . . . so this won't recycle in another relationship.
---Bill_bila5659 on 7/10/08


Karen & Ron::Adultery is the end result of Temptation,caused by a weak, control system and desire.The rules have Not changed since Jesus made the declarationIn Matt5:27-32.There is many a reconciliation & or divorce.The choice is yours based on the strength of your bond of love and willingness to Forgive AND Forget.This is the truth.
---Emcee on 7/10/08


Hi Karen, I don't know the answer to your question, but my wife cheated on me too and I'm in the same situation you are. So maybe we'll both find out the answer
---Ron on 7/10/08




Well karen, sounds like John wants to get married right away. He needs you so he can move here, no doubt. I can't blame the man.
---sheri on 7/25/07


Ruth you are giving out the wrong info and you need to study more before leading someone wrong. This lady can re marry according to the Word of God. If a spouse dies or is caught in adultery the other spouse is indeed free to remarry. The person they choose to marry should preferably be a Christian. This only applies to Christians.
---Robyn on 7/25/07


The bloggers have given you ref of Mat and 1cor. They have shown that you can marry again with no problem. I would like to offer Eph5:21-23. There it gives a good discription of what to look for in a partner. If he can treat and love you in that way. Also,1Cor7:39 and 2cor6:14 lets you know that you do need to marry "only in the Lord" as you say and that you need to not "be unequally yoked with a nonbeliever". Pray and wait upon the Lord. My prayers are with you.
---jody on 7/25/07


According to what Jesus said, you are free to remarry. The Bible is very clear when Jesus said that a person who is divorced and remairried other than because of sexual sins, they are committing adultery.
---john on 7/25/07


Hello,

My name is John Nwachukwu. Iam a citizen of Nigeria but i live in Dakar the capital city of Senegal. I am still single, i need you as my friend for a long term relationship based on true love and understanding. If you are interested reply so that we can talk more. I hope your soul is blessed today.
---JOHN_NWACHUKWU on 7/24/07


Yes you can marry. yes if you are a christian it must be a christian. My husband left me.[cheating too] I thought I would have to spend the rest of my life alone {I am not dating but would like to} I have some friends who showed me many scriptures on how I could marry again if God was in it. God loves us and wouldn't give us a heart if we weren't to love.
---Laureen on 5/29/05


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May I offer you some scripture : Matt:5:32 , Matt:19:9

I believe that restoration of any marriage is possible if there is one willing spouse. I also believe that the bible makes it clear that on the grounds of adultery , remarriage is permitted. If your spouse dies or divorces you because of adultery you are permitted to re-marry. However , in my understanding of scripture those are the only circumstances under which it is permitted. There's also verses throughout Corinthians , Mark e.t.c. about this issue. I would suggest you read these and come to your own conclusion.
---BeckyH on 4/30/05


yes, if he commited adultery or fornication with an unmarried woman you have grounds for divorce and a right to remarry. remember God is a God of 2 and 3 and 4 chances.........
---barba3644 on 4/30/05


I'am sorry to tell you, But when you get A Divorce, that it is wrong to remarry, or Date,or even be involed in any kind of sex relationship While your spouse is still living. Because that is comitting adultry.Once he passes away, then you can Remarry or just date. And go on with your life. The Bible clearly states that.
---Ruth on 4/29/05


Wanting a help mate is part of our make up even as in Adam and Eve so are we. Nothing wrong in wanting to marry but only when we seek God's quidance in the decisions, will happiness be found. As for the past mistakes, He knows the best solution. The Bible does not give a yah or nah about remarrying, but does give quidance as to what to be as a help-mate for the one He has for you. Study to show yourself approved unto God a workman not ashame but rightly dividing the Word of truth. Seek ye first God and all will follow. My prayers of support.
---Blue on 4/28/05


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First of all, please don't respond to John's post. Second of all, read 1 Corinthians, Chapter 7.
---Katie on 4/28/05


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