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Caught My Husband Cheating

I caught my husband cheating, AGAIN. I'm angry with myself for putting up with it still. Im angrier and unable to forgive him this time. I know God wants me to forgive, I don't know if I can forgive him and stay with him. How can I truly forgive him without disrupting our lives (children)?

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 ---Myriam on 4/28/05
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Anne:-My views are unchanged Thank you. Blessings
---MIC on 4/27/09


Mic~ I posted a reply comment to you below, but I think they took this blog off the main menu. Hope you are doing great and God bless.
---Anne on 4/27/09


Mic~ You are so sweet and what lovely words you spoke. I think you know me quite well. You have a very kind, warm and perceptive heart. Still can't believe you're 84, I always picture you as being around early 60's or so. Keep your great youthful spirit- it's a wonderful inspiration. God bless.
---Anne on 4/24/09


Another ANNE?:- from out of the blue~thanks for the correction but one does get a glimpse into the tenderness or volatility of people who write and you did qualify under those express vibes you emanate Quiet Firm yet tender Honest and well spoken, seeking to do that which is Right.Hope I am close in my synopsis of the gentle woman in you.
---MIC on 4/24/09


Hi Mic~ That is a different Anne than myself, but yes your thoughts for Anne are very heartfelt and she needs our prayers. God bless.
---Anne on 4/22/09




Anne:-I just read your post of 22/2/09 and I would venture to say I am nonplussed. My thoughts go out to you with compassion love and understanding for your thoughts and feelings.To be hurt in this way is like a Knife thrust as it is so personal.May God help you find the courage to do that which is right for the sake of your child.My prayers are with you Be Brave and pray, every cloud has a silver lining God bless and give you courage.
---MIC on 4/22/09


I would like to know the answer to that too. Just this morning I saw text messages from some girl on his phone. I texted her back from his phone asking her is she was aware that he lived with me and our 2 children. I am at a dead end and I know that everyone will say leave him. It is easier said then done when children are involved.
---Wendy on 4/21/09


Love does not hurt? have YOU ever hurt someone you love? Ever yelled at your children or your parents? Ever told a white lie to your spouse or kids or parents? Ever said things you regret? Did that mean you didn't love them? Perfect love does not hurt but we don't live in a perfect world yet. this is a FALLEN world, it has sin. Sinning against someone does not mean you have no love for them, it means your love it imperfect and every human's love is imperfect at this point.
---melinda on 4/13/09


Let me blunt: your husband does not love you. Love does not hurt. I caught my husband in an emotional and sexual affair 18 months ago,we have been married 17 years. I wonder all the time what long term effects this will have on our two son's. Selfish, self - centered immature people go into affairs. I say your husband does not love you because:if the opportunity arose, would you have an affair? "NO!". Why is that? Because you love him and your family. You wouldn't want to hurt them no matter how awful things were. Actions speak louder than words and Love is a something we DO. Find peace in knowing God does have a plan. It may not be the plan you want or happen in your time frame, but God's will will be.
---marfradra on 4/10/09


forgiveness. We are called to forgive everyone. Such a difficult thing to be called to do. Forgiveness most people forget, is for you that you won't harbor your feelings and let them consume you. Forgiving is offering it up to God that He will take care of it.

Reconsiliaton is a whole other matter. We do not have to reconcile with people, and it is dependent on the offending person coming to you seeking to repent of their sins. God forgives us all, but only reconciles with those who accept Him.

Keep in mind there are some wounds you treat, and there are those that are rotting and you must amputate. This works for relationships no matter who they are. If you have tried everything, than for your sake and you son's.
---Gregg on 4/9/09




The bible talks about forgiveness, it also talks about infidelity. As a Christian, I'm not sure why you would put up with your husband cheating on you. God wants you to forgive so you don't harbor hate, but He also wants you to have respect for yourself.

I know it's hard with your kids involved, but I personally think a relationship based on infidelity is destined to fail.

Trust your instincts,

Brian
---Brian on 4/6/09


Hi Anne~ My name is Anne too. I am often on the 'Eternal Security' blog. I'm sorry we're living in such a terrible day and I'm sorry your husband has done such a terrible thing as to cheat on you. You are in my thoughts and prayers, and I pray God continues to strengthen and give you wisdom in this difficult situation.

I think I will go by Anne B. from now on since your name is 'Anne' too. God bless.
---Anne_B. on 2/24/09


I too just found out that my husband is cheating on me. I really dont know what to do right now. But the two things that give me strength is my faith in God and my son. I've trusted my husband so much, I became lenient and very understanding and kind but this is all I get. I dont deserve this and I really dont know what to do. Please help me...
---Anne on 2/22/09


Well, if you stay you're telling him it's ok. YES as a Christian you need to do what's best for the children, but what's it to you when you have to come home to a cheater? Shoot, I'd leave his butt on the curb and take the children. Make him pay child support and move on.
---Mark on 2/16/09


The bible does command us to forgive but it does not demand us to continue to just hand out forgiveness in such abundance when the other person is continuing in sin expecting grace to abound! It is my belief that when a spouse has cheated once and lied about it they will continue to cheat with or without grace. If there is any evidence that your husband has cheated and as you say he fails to own up to it then you really need to get help from a counselor to find the future direction of your marriage commitments. I hope you the best!
---Woody on 2/15/09


Sorry, but I think these guys (Cheaters,Thieves, Abusers) LOVE their POSITION OF POWER in their Relationship with You (depending they stay with the family). If it was you they loved they would not do the very worst thing in the world that they KNOW would kill you (the person they love?), why not just pour draino down your throat...it would eat into your heart and feel a whole lot better than the way they did it! First and foremost, they love their spoiled brat, "gotta have it my way", "eat my cake and have it too" behavior, not you wife...do not think that they did not weigh the pros and cons before they did it ...then they did it!!! These evil men (and women) have the love of Self over You and anyone else...including HER .
---Beth on 1/11/09


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I know my husband cheated on me in 2007. He denies it but no man does not notice that his wife has lost 28 pounds. I realized he was grooming himself differently and wearing silk briefs. He was smelling freshly washed when he came home. His excuse was that the air conditioner was on high at work. Also I just recently found he has several profiles posted on adult finders and other kinds of fling websites. One site he opened the day after my birthday. I checked his history on the internet browser. I am confused and angry. Sad and I feel inadequate. He says he loves me yet he does this?! This has been going on now for over two years. I know I should just leave but I just can not seem to take that first step. Confrontation does nothing.
---Katie on 1/10/09


Get out now. I am currently in a relationship much like yours. I have been in this situation for over ten years now. I just realized that staying and trying to accept it again and again has affected my children. Cheating has made my children suffer, while my husband seems to get his satisfaction every chance he can. Ask your self how many times has he cheated? How many times have you dealt with his cheating? How many times have you blamed yourself? Finally ask your self if he has cheated more than once what are the odds that he will stop. I have been told by my husband that it is my fault, genetics, society, boredom, that I am insane, everything but it still has not stopped.
---Theresa on 12/19/08


What does the bible say about divorce? Should you divorce your husband because he obviously has a problem with fidelity to the point of doing it at least twice? NO

Put it totally into God's hands because you have no control over the outcome, go to a church of truth, pray and read your bible without ceasing.

Ask God that "His will be done" not whatever you think should happen, be faithful and certain that this will have a great affect on you and your husband.

joe4993
---Joe_Fallon on 2/20/08


I'am in the same situation. Also not the first time.4th.The last to times it was emotional affairs, which surely would have ended up in sexual affairs if I did not find out that soon. 3 months of texting,phone calls + coffee dates.He does not want to loose me and says he loves me. He is going for counselling now.He ia a christian! How many times does God want me to forgive him?
---Madelane on 2/19/08


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Mike ... If you want to continue this discussion, I suggest you ive yourself a more specific identity, not just "Mike", becuase a short while ago there was a "Mike" who like Lynda, was constantly accusing others of using multiple identities.
You don't want to be confused with him!
---alan_of_UK on 2/4/08


I don't know what proof you would expect on a public blog restricting use of private data. I performed in the church orchestra in maryland with two friends from work. She claims to be against any organized religion now and says she thought I was having an affair with someone from the church orchestra so that rationalized it for her. She never went to church while I was gone and I saw some chaplains after I found out on my rest/recuperation leave who were no help. Married life is miserable now.
---Mike on 2/4/08


I honestly do not want you to slip through the cracks.
A mind is a valuable thing to keep. How do you plan to get your life back on track?
You must choose this day whom you will allow to save you.
God can move through bad decisions but He can't move through "no" decisions.
You'll have to make a decision.
---Lynda on 2/3/08


"Mike", why are you doing that?

Is it not possible to blog without going in to fabricated details about an imaginary life? Do you not know that the earmarks of this type of compulsion are to add more contrived details upon details to cover more details. After about 5000 of them, I do not believe a single word of it. Why do you have to give any details at all about these personal lives?
What is driving you to do that?
---Lynda on 2/3/08


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Portraying yourself as retired men is one thing. Pretending you were in Iraq is another.
Since I do not live in the world of fantasy, I can see, crystal clearly, that many of these lives are very angry. Angry at your spouse and life in general. They are used as a way to speak from your spouse's mind and speak from your mind and speak from the minds of whomever did you wrong, wrong, wrong.
---Lynda on 2/3/08


If I have to co-exist in this parallel world, I'm going to speak as though it is one person and one person only.
I'm not wading through any more details.
You might believe them temporarily for the moment, but I do not.

You need to forgive your family and your spouse. You've told us repeatedly that you are trapped in a loveless marriage.
---Lynda on 2/3/08


The family business makes it impossible for you to escape without losing. I get it.

Have you stopped attending church because of all of this mess? I'm sure that you've consulted people about your situation. What do they tell you?
Are you going to visit another church, attend elsewhere?
---Lynda on 2/3/08


I give up. I have five kids and just spent almost a year and a half in Iraq to come home on leave and find that my wife cheated with our most trusted neighbor for six months. She refuses to go to church anymore, still denies parts of what she did. I feel stuck because I love my kids. I don't want to get a divorce and see them every year or two. I would go cheat too but I don't have time to have the social life and don't feel like anyone would want me, this really is bad for self-respect. Hopeless.
---Mike on 1/31/08


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A pastor? You don't have to rely on a pastor, a pastor will probably take advantage of a vulnerable woman too. It bugs me that these religious freaks always bring religion into the picture.
---Al on 12/24/07


Mine did too..and denied every aspect and anything to do with it. I think he believed that it didn't even happen, he was involved with a woman for 4 years, she got pregnant, he worked out of the country, came home thinking life was going to be beautiful...i gave him so many chances and finally, I can't live my life on eggshells and his empty dreams...you deserve better.
---cathunter on 12/22/07


My husband cheated too. But after he got caught cleaned up his act. If he isn't willing to change, you have no obligation to stay with him. You can forgive - it is possible - but that doesn't mean you need to stay with him. It sucks, I know. I've made it work and it's so hard. I don't think I could stay with someone who did that to me especially when biblically, you are allowed to leave.
---Amberly on 12/12/07


I can really empathize, since I just found out my husband Jim is sleeping around with young women...it just tears me up inside. I pray about it constantly, but can't seem to forgive, and certainly not forget. He's a veterinarian and women try to seduce him while he's examining their pets. It's really sinful and terrible and I don't know what to do. Sometimes I just want to tell everyone that he is not who he seems to be. Distraught in kitsap
---Jan on 12/9/07


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Well you can forgive him even though it's gonna be hard. both you and him talk to the children and see how they would feel about it first.good luck
---felicia on 9/7/07


I am in the same situation with my wife and had caught her cheating on me for over 3 years. I also have two children. This is the most panful
feeling I have ever had, my heart is torn in pieces . I wish someone could give me somee advice on my situation
---Morris on 8/12/07


none of these men have the fear of God. none of them are probably even real christians--just total frauds. they're most likely headed straight to hell. perhaps you should tell them this and maybe they will start fearing the one who can cast the soul into hell.
---bryan_shaw on 8/11/07


Right now you are very hurt and it is very hard to frogive when you are hurt inside especially when children are involved as well. God does say though that if we do not forgiv,he will not forgive us. Try to pray to God for your answer. In time forgiveness will come and mabe talk to your children as well about how there are times when we all mak big mistakes. Forgiveness can be hard but needs to be done in order to heal and physically move on. Have you thought about christian counseling ?
---Rev._Kathleen on 8/10/07


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my husband of 25 years left us for other woman, i sometimes think i still love him but will never go back, i was broken into tiny bits and i have managed to piece them all together again for my childrens sake and for my own sake, be strong stay focused on you and your kids, what goes round comes round,one fine day the reality will hit these people where it hurts,
---bernie on 8/10/07


you need to put boundries in place. if this is goin to work we go to councelling, we start praying together every night we read the bible with our children every dinner etc.. he also needs to be held accountable, he should talk with a pastor
---lana on 8/8/07


my husband cheated on me about a month ago and it has been the hardest thing ive gone through in my life. but i realized i love him enough to forgive him and try to move on. i havent forgotten though i bring it up almost everyday. in your blog you said that he cheated again, so i take it this is the second time he has done this. i dont know what to tell you about how to deal with it a second time because i forgave my husband this time but if he did it again i wouldn't be able to deal with it again.
---Tiffany on 8/2/07


I just found out less than a month ago that my husband was unfaithful and a child was the result of the affair. Since then, my trust is very thin and I have been reading emails. He is still flirting with an ex even though he has hurt me to my core. I love him and we have 2 kids. He says he is sorry and that it was only once and he has learned from it, but I am torn. I can't relive the life that my fore-mothers did. I want to abide by the word, but how much hurt can a person take.
---Tamara on 7/27/07


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I caught my husband cheating yesterday too. He gave me his laptop to do some research on our vacation plans. I was just proceeding to log into my email account when his inbox came up. Some email subjects looked very fishy and after I had finished going through them, it was clear that he had been cheating on me. I realised this with a shock. I had caught him cheating on me in 2001 and he had promised he wouldn't repeat the mistakes but to no avail.
---Sriya on 7/13/07


I will not be over religious on this one. You can not forgive on your own. You need God to help.
---catherine on 6/21/07


I have learned that much of a person's behaviour stems from childhood. It is a well known fact that men from unstable childhoods will carry this through into adult life. Perhaps if the root of the problem is identified, then something can be done about it? Pray everyday to help you forgive your husband, and in the meantime, perhaps you should suggest councelling/therapy? You love your husband, and this is why it hurts so much. However, in your situation you MUST put your children first ALWAYS.
---Sarah on 6/21/07


I was in your shoe two years ago. If your husband shows he is sorry, I would give him another chance. I beleive in forgiveness but God does not want us to be doormats. I regret giving my husband another chance (after 3 affairs) because two years later, I still have alot of bitterness for allowing myself to let him in again. If it's his first time, it could be a mistake, but if it's been more than once, it could be selfishness and a character flaw which is hard to fix.
---barb on 3/3/07


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A response from the other woman. Check there cell phone bills!!!!!!!!!!!! I have been with this married professor for 11 years now, and have been baffled considering the endless hours we have spent on our cell phones that she hasn't a clue. Also, he will never tell the truth. If you want the truth, call the mistress.
---M on 2/28/07


I noticed that this blog started a long time ago.Is this a new issue?It would be nice to have an update.
---chestnut_burr on 2/21/07


How many times has God forgiven you for sinning? In God's eyes a sin is a sin, whether it's cheating or simply disobedience in something He has revealed to you. You must forgive so you don't disrupt the lives of the children anymore.
---jamin on 2/21/07


the same thing happend to me, i was the one that was dating someone elses husband without the knowledge that he was married.what i did was that i prayed about it and i asked God to forgive me for the wrong that i had done, i asked God to give me the courage to ask for forgivness from this man even though i thought he was off wrong.at that point in time i never thought that i would forgive him but i learned that forgiveness starts with you and then only will you lern to forgive others.God loves you
---makgomo on 2/1/07


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Sarah, Psalm 1:1 "Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly,"
Find a pastor to help you,please. Don't rely on these blogs. There are too many differing opinions. You are welcome to e-mail me anytime. Ask God what he wants,,, and live accordingly.
---faye4464 on 1/27/07


I would find it very hard and/or impossible for a spouse to live with his husband or wife if either of them cheats.

Infidelity is a very serious "crime" and one of the biggest insults one can offend another person with. There should be no room for it and when things starts getting shaky in a relationship, people should resort to professional councelling.

Infidelity brings lots of pain to BOTH parties and it must be a NO-NO.
---Caring on 1/27/07


I just caught my husband having an affair. The bible says that you can leave your husband and still maintain your faithful living. If u were good enough to take him back once, you need to work on making the rest of your life happy.
---Sarah on 1/26/07


He has already disrupted your childrens lives,children are not dumb & they bounce back better then we do from all kinds of things. U will forgive in time, it is human to feel-anger, sadness, this is normal. Stay w/ is another thing that is between you & him. God doesnt want U used as a door mat or to catch a disease. U "mean" something to God, U are most "valued" to Him remember that. Your children need U also & need U healthy. But the final decision is only yours.
---Jeanne on 11/6/06


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my wife cheated on me and then cheated during two more reconciliation attempts... by round 3 i'd had enough abuse and divorced. forgiveness? at some point it becomes a sick joke. do all of you believe that god or christ EXPECTS one to keep on forgiving while being continually humiliated or in a holding pattern until the abuse starts again?! serial cheaters have a psychological problem that guarantees more cheating. divine forgiveness by the offended spouse should not be a variable in these circumstances.
---kirche on 8/29/06


The first verse I wrote as a note to myself was.

The Lord is on my side;
I will not fear.
What can man do to me?
It is better to trust in the Lord, than to put confidence in man.

I caught my husband cheating, and in the middle of dicussing what had happened commited my life to the lord (I had been thinking about it, but this was the first time I can say I verbalized my intentions) and let him know. He was against it. It was the best choice to leave.
---Novella on 1/11/06


I believe that forgiveness is the only way; my husband cheated on me and eventually told me the truth. I felt like my world was ending, later that day I watched the movie "the passion" and I received a new perspective on life. I had the chance to feel and see the pain the Jesus went through before he made the ultimate sacrifice. You see we were forgiven for our sins without judgment, and I continue to live by that principle. Look to the future.
---Juanita on 10/21/05


my husband cheated on me, I hurt so much that I wanted to die. I am still having problems trusting him. I do love him, I have forgiven him, it is what God would want me to do. Is he cheating on me again, i am not sure. But I do know that we have shared too many memories to not keep trying. sorry for your pain, believe me I know how you feel.
---mary on 7/12/05


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When God puts together a relationship He does it right. Here is what I believe, God is in control of everything. If you have faith and hang on to Him as your focus, you cannot go wrong. Do what you have to do and if God doesn't want something to happen, it will not happen. But you have to be ok with His dicision. Trust in the Lord and you will see later that it was the best thing you ever did.
---Lupe2618 on 6/17/05


That is the reason she came home. I believe with all my heart that God was convicting her at that time and working with me also to be the person He wanted me to be. In every case God is involve. In yours too. we are not left along to work out our problems. God knows what is in your heart. He moves the heart of any person. He cares about your kids too. But He needs time.
---Lupe2618 on 6/17/05


After my wife died, my daughter asked me if I knew why my wife had come back home, and I said we never talked about it. She told me that one day her mom was sleeping in this house and had a dream, in the dream she was wearing a black skirt and red blouse. She had an accident and she got killed. That she was in a coffin and she could see us crying. She tried to talked to us but we could not hear her. After that night she could hear us cry everywhere she went.
---Lupe2618 on 6/17/05


I don't want to tell you to devorce him because I don't know if that is what God wants you to do. I do know if you do nothing, it will continue. Any time there is a problem, someone has to do something. You might be helping him with his sin because you keep forgiving him. What I mean is, by telling him you forgive him. Of course in your heart you do have to forgive him for your sake and not his.
---Lupe2618 on 6/17/05


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I knew my wife was not happy here and wanted to have fun at the bars. I could not stop her but when she came back she was so changed. We lived eight more years together and one day on Dec.10 98 she died at a hospital. My point is that when something is not right in a marriage something has to happen. If no one does nothing, it will continue. In my case my wife moved out. She made the decision and now I know it was the right one. Of course when it was happening I thought it was so terrible.
---Lupe2618 on 6/17/05


Sister, I want to just throw in my two cents on this question. In my case my wife was going out so much and wanted her freedom cause later she told me she didn't love me and didn't have any respect for me.we had been married 25 years. She said she was moving out. Of course it devastated me. We were separated for almost one year. One day she came back and when she did I never asked her anything. I knew I had to forgive her no matter what.
---Lupe2618 on 6/17/05


My husband have been acting different he fight with me everyday about any little thing and comes home 3 and 4 in the morning and when I ask him anything he said he doesn't have to answer to me. I know not what to do he told me is my decision he is acting like he doesn't care or he just stop loving me please help me take a decision should I get a divorce or should I keep tring
---dina on 6/8/05


Dear Myriam,adultery is wrong we know that,but why does it happen?it isn't always about sex.People often do this to get something they don't get at home: attention ,love, respect, a feeling of being needed,a feeling of belonging.And if you think the children don't know,you may be wrong.pray about it,think about it,God bless you,I hope you can work it out.
---RUSSELL on 4/30/05


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In his book, I Loved A Woman, Walter Trobish makes this statement: Adultery is a man'a last desperate cry for help. HE has a problem and he thinks he can solve it with an affair. It's not about sex. It's about the need for intimacy. Some has said intimany is into-me-see. He wants someone to see into him and love him anyway. Of course he's going about it the wrong way. All sin is an inappropriate way to fill legitimate needs. He has to discover what the real need is and then work on filling that. Until he does, even if he gives up affairs, he will use something else as inappropriate.
---Bill on 4/29/05


Wow, I feel bad for you and your kids. But, kids are not stupid. They will know what is what before long. ANd when mom is not happy, NO body is happy so right now you should concentrate on making yourself happy, do whatever it takes.
luv, sue
---sues on 4/29/05


So....sad,the reality here is,CHEATING AGAIN.Sad indeed you took heart to forgive him the first time he did it,must have established what transpired for this unGODLY behaivour,yuo deserve the best he made his vows so did you and marriage is not a bed of roses,dialogue and prayers are keys to a succesfull marriage, if one is not satisfied,the other bears the burn,even when you forgive him he might not appreciate,be wise.
---peter on 4/29/05


There is and old saying, "You burned me once that's your fault, you burned me twice, that's my fault". It would take God for you to get over this and to forgive this man. I certainly wouldn't stay with him, and I would be honest with my children of why we wouldn't be together, depending on how old your children are.
---Rebecca_D on 4/29/05


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I, too, caught my now ex-husband cheating. He denied doing it, but I had written proof of it. I forgave him, tried further to make the marriage work, but he refused to change his ways and kept carrying on affairs with numerous women, so I was left with no choice, after much prayer and soul-searching, to leave him and divorce him. He has since been doing the same thing to other women. Take the problem to the Lord and let Him direct you in what you should do next. Staying "because of the children" is not the main issue.
---Ann on 4/28/05


Dear Myrian,Rest assured that God knows your heart, and knows allrady as we all do that you want to forgive your husband and I'm cofident that you will.Mat.11:28,29,30 " Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upone you and learn from me for I am gentle and hunble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light" (NIV). God's main concern is that we go to him with every need, problem and he will show you after you have rested in him witch way to go and what to do next.
---Juan4544 on 4/28/05


'Do not commit the same sin twice. The punishment you get the first time ought to be enough.'(Sirach 7:8) You should be angry with yourself for allowing the diruption of your life.
---gregg on 4/28/05


Trusting God does NOT mean allowing people to walk all over you and say you just forgive. God helps them who help themselves. Stand up for yourself, and tell your husband if he can't give you the respect you deserve, he needs to step!
---Delores on 4/28/05


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First of all i am sorry to hear that your husband is cheating. Mine cheated once, and it took a long time to forgive. yes the lord wants us to forgive, but, still he doesnot want us to live with any kind of abuse. Adultery is grounds for a divorce even in Gods eyes. this is in the Bible. God bless and good luck. I will pray that the Lord will touch your husband and that He will give you a quick answer to your problem. love in Christ. judy5775
---Judy on 4/28/05


Myriam:
First, ask theLord to find the strength to forgive your husband. Second, think carefully in your heart, whether or not you may have contributd to his misbehaviour. It sometimes happens that for one intimacy is a heaven sent need but for the other it is mostly a pain in the...! In that case, even though it is wrong, sidesteps will happen.
Thirdly: If you honestly believe you are not at all at fault, then you will have the option of leaving right away or of warning him that you will leave him if it should happen again. There have to be consequences, or he won't change!
---Pierre on 4/28/05


I hate to say it but some people will abuse your forgiveness as happened to me with an ex fiance. He cheated, I forgave and got burnt later down the road (a leopard can't change its spots), and you can lead a horse to water, but can't make it drink. Sure, forgive so that you are not held in bondage to the bitterness. Forgive with all your heart, but forgiving him doesn't mean letting him back into your lives. Move on. If you protect your husband from the consequences of his cheating, you are not helping him to deal with his problems. He needs to taste the dirt so that he doesn't want it.
---lisa on 4/28/05


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