My Husband Just Left Me
I'm a 54 years old women, who's husband has found his new love after 27 years marriage. He has separated now, and I'm alone, because my two sons aren't home with me. Could anybody pray for me, and give an advice to outlive this period?
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---elisa on 5/4/05
Helpful Blog Vote (49)
I feel like i dont want to be like him, he has said a lot of mean stuff and i just want to show him how God loves and forgives even if i have to stay away for a while. Pride is his downfall and i dont want to punish him for it, but I am no one's savior, that is Christ job. I love him and just dont want it to be like this.
---Lysa on 6/23/09|
how are you doing?
hope your situation has improved now?
have a happy week
---patie3447 on 6/23/09|
"The only thing my ex wants to do is bible study which is a blessing"
No,that is not a blessing, unless he learns from the Bible how he is supposed to live in this world, and how he should treat other people.
Your reaction was wrong, but God forgives.
I think you are better off without him
---alan8566_of_uk on 6/23/09|
Dated 2 yrs. He got saved last year. i've been saved for 15yrs. I'm 25 he is 29. one afternoon we were in his car and saw a gentleman struck by a bus. we stopped to help, the injured was leaning on a parked car. the owner of the parked car came out started cursing and pushed the injured off his car, i started cursing him back, flipped out and kicked his car. My boyfriend said that we were over, i was a poor reflection of him and the two years together were negated by this one time event. God keeps me going but it is hard. The only thing my ex wants to do is bible study which is a blessing but he wont address our issue or take me back and says he doesnt care if i dont want to wait till he is ready to take me back. Help.
---Lysa on 6/22/09|
Im so sorry your husban left you but i will be glad to pray for you as mine left me monday this week...I guess we are going through the same things..Please keep in touch and let me know some of your ideas..
---sherrie on 6/6/09|
Oh I am so sorry hon! My heart goes out to you. Use this time alone to pray, read Bible--join a church or become more involved in your church. Let your relationship with Christ grow so it can fullfill you. You may find that in time being alone is not all that bad. And please remember with Christ you are never alone! He is always near. God Bless you.
---cindy on 1/6/09|
I have been through the same. It is very difficult and lonely. God gives us the hard times for a reason to find our true purpose, now you are free to explore you real purpose. I have been reading books from Wayne Dyer and find it helpful as I go through this transition. I wish you the best in the New Year.
---Robert on 1/1/09|
My husband left also, just this past friday. 1 week before christmas. I have had alot of family and friends rally around me and with the Lord's love I feel at peace. I praise Jesus for all that I do have, and for the blessings only His father has provided. I pray that my husband can see his wrong doing and come home, but only if it is God's will. I also ask the Holy Spirit to guide me to the way of hope when I start to worry or be sad. I know how you feel hun, Im there now.
---Tracy on 12/23/08|
What a terrible betrayal. Just lean on the Lord. There is a meaning to everything that happens in life. Try to make the situation turn out to be the best thing that happened to you. Seek to be closer to the Lord.
---frances008 on 12/11/08|
I can imagine no situation more painful...the sense of rejection and loss...the reliving of the past with all sorts of self doubt. Being physically alone must only make it worse, with hours to think.
I will, indeed, pray for you.
Being left alone happens to most women sooner or later, weather from separation or a husband's death. If you belong to a church, get to know the women there. Chances are you will meet others in a similar situation. Perhaps you can find a woman to be a "prayer partner". And social events, travel etc. usually attended by couples can often be enjoyed by two unattached women.Look for opportunities to help others, perhaps younger women coping with small children or a needy family.
---Donna66 on 12/9/08|
meet a 54 year old male just seperated from his wife, Texas this person is me
---robert on 12/9/08|
i am going through a very similar situation and know how badly you are hurting. the best advice I have received is to continue to pray for your husband and let God be in control. no matter what we do on our own will not work. if he is to come back to you, let him do it on his own. Satan has control of our husbands minds right now. Only God and prayer can release this bondage. Let me pray for you dear sister...Heavenly Father, please wrap you loving arms around this dear woman. give her the strentgh for a sound mind that can only come from you. even though she is walking through a deep valley right how, you are with her. please give her the peace that can only come from you, In Jesus Name, Amen.
---JoJo on 10/14/08|
I understand how if feels to be heart broken. Trust God whatever comes your way. I can relate and it is not easy without God. If it wasnt for the Lord I never would have made it. Give it to the Lord.
---shanetta on 9/17/08|
I am very sorry that your husband has made the wrong choice. Do not let this destroy your faith. Instead hold on to Jesus and cry out to him for help. He will hear you. Psalm 143 might help: Cry out to Jesus for his help. Hide yourself in Jesus(verse 9) and make sure that despite your horrible situation, you do God's will(verse 10). Do what is right and avoid going down the path of resentment. This is a normal response but it will not help and it is not God's will. "Lord hold out your hand of love to this poor woman." May he bless you.
---sian on 9/17/08|
God Bless You...I feel how you may be feeling right now. Stunned, sad, emotional, and wondering if this is the way it'll truly work out. Will you ever get the answers you seek from him. I am 33 and going through the same, my husband of 12 years has left. I feel sad right now because our 10 and 11 year olds are at school and I'm home alone. Being ALONE makes the ache hurt more. But, I'm going to need to make it on my own, and find the person I was before I knew him, find the "me" that I lost years back... I pray for peace in your soul and I pray for joy in your heart, and I pray that pain of loss will soon fade and leave you instead with renewed interests from your youth. I pray for healing....Lisa
---LISA on 9/17/08|
may i know why he left? has anyone bothered to ask?
---Jimmy on 9/15/08|
I have recently find out that my husband of 26 years, while working out of country, has fathered 2 chldren, one of which was born Sept. 4, 2008. I don't know what I should do either because we have 4 children. I don't work and I don't want to lose the house. From the e mails I have read of his, he has had several affairs and I never want to see him again, how can I find out if he has married one of these women?
---Teresa_Frost on 9/14/08|
My advice is to treat it like a death. You will be in mourning for approximately a year. God will give you grace to get over this. God will comfort you. Let yourself have time to cry. Things will improve.
---frances008 on 7/24/08|
Yes I will pray for you! My heavenly Father in the name of Jesus, please help this lady to find some kind of peace. Take care of her and deliver her from all evils. In Jesus name, Amen.++>>>Advice: Hang in there.
---catherine on 7/23/08|
it is really sad that this should happen but know for sure that God is in control of your life. He sees your tears and is ready to wipe them...
Let us pray
Father God, i pray for this lovely daugher of yours who is suffering from such a loss.
i ask that your fill her life with your love, grace and peace.
i call her husband back home from where ever he is and ask that every ungodly spell over his life be broken right now in Jesus' Name. Amen
God bless you. stay calm and keep in touch with your creator, He understands your condition best and has the solution.
---patience on 7/22/08|
I am recently in the same position. Do you have a church family? If you do you must tell them your situation. The prayers they will have for you will work wonders and they will embrace you. That is how I'm getting by. Knowing that I'm loved is comfort. I don't know your name but I will pray for you.
---Patricia_Lemon on 7/8/08|
Dear Sweet Sister,
I am sorry you are going through this. I understand and have went through it myself. God to give me back the years the world and the relationship took away and he did. I had a tummy tuck, got a new set of vaneers on my teeth and a mini-face lift and a new job that allowed me to travel. I know that all of the above may not be you but some of these things can help. God is your husband now, He is your provider and there are many men who would love you. Love again! Deuteronomy 24:1-2
---veronica on 5/30/08|
Thanks Alan :) I not sure what i did to offend her (L). I really didnt have any advice for this woman but after reading her story my heart was saddened so I wandered(while prayed for)what had happened to her.
---emtp on 2/5/08|
It's very difficult for you to reconcile to the fact that amanwho had lived with you for 27 years should want to find for anew love. You feel betrayed. Take heart jesus was betrayed. You may never know whether the 3rd party is serious or just playing with his emotions. Trust only the Almighty God. Things can fail you, people can fail you but our God never fails us. GBU
---Wong_Judy on 2/5/08|
Lynda #2 ... Look at the heading of this page, & you will see Rellationships, marriage and love as categories of blog.
Don't try to deny Christian (and enquirers) the right to pose such problems and stop Christian people from giving Christian answers.
Jesus and the Buible have the answers to such human problems as well as gin#ving the salvation message.
Jesus teaches us not only how to be saved but also how to live in this life.
---a on 2/5/08|
Lynda # 3 That last one, from "a" was not me trying to have a second personality, but just a typo!
---alan_of_UK on 2/5/08|
A child learning to walk falls down, but never gives up till it learns to walk and steady itself and has mastered the art of Walking.A husband who jumps into the swirling waters, from the matrimonial bridge of security is not always saved.Be thankful you are on solid ground with a new Vision, one fixed destiny. One door closes God opens another not necessairly with another man or woman,Hence the saying "Trust in the Lord for He is Divine",Gifts of the Lord come in strange ways but they Come.
---Emcee on 2/4/08|
Lynda ... # 1 You are getting better and better!!!
You say you would like to see Christian blogs answered by Christians. You seem to think Christian blogs have only to "talk about Jesus Christ and not themself"
That is indeed one of the kinds of Christian blog, and very valuable.
If those interest you so much, why don't you contribute to them?
---alan_of_UK on 2/4/08|
Maybe, maybe not, empt.
Years and years of these questions have been raised and answered by the one living in misery. There has been little improvement and the misery is brought up, day after day.
I don't see it as therapeutic, but another day of misery seeking more company.
You do not see anyone else writing in saying that it's helping them besides the one posing and answering their own questions.
---Lynda on 2/3/08|
Those who do reply are perceived as "strangers" living in a foreign land.
What you really want is your own website, where you can live comfortably in a world of your own making, questions, answers and comforting - to your liking, worded the way that suits you. You've almost achieved that as they are few of us outsiders responding back to you.
I think you would have your own website if the need for constant attention was not so enticing, being viewed by 1000's that do not respond.
---Lynda on 2/3/08|
I see the sidebar comments from the gallery, angry because a rare few are answering you, and disrupting this world of misery.
Well, I recently read one of the Mod's comments that over 100,000 view and about 1 or 2% reply. Wouldn't it be great if more people would join in.
I would enjoy visiting with someone that is not living in a parallel world of misery.
---Lynda on 2/3/08|
How would I love to see bloggers that are content with one name on a website that belongs to Christianity.
How would I love to see bloggers that are not jealous of all others that want to respond to Christianity without having to defend their blogging name every day.
How would I love to see bloggers, fellow travelers that want to talk about Jesus Christ and not themself.
---Lynda on 2/3/08|
Elisa posted this in May of 05 and has not responded since--With all of the heartfelt responses and prayer i wonder if she is doing well? Even if she never came back to read the responses, God in all his Wonder can use these to help comfort other hurting souls.
---emtp on 2/2/08|
I am 23 year old women, my husbant left me becouse of his mom, she separeted us. I love him and I pray for him. I know that for God is nothing impossible. Please pray for me. I want to save my marriege.
---Lanna on 2/2/08|
I am 35 and the mother of 6 kids.My husband left today. I don't know if he will ever come home. I do believe that with prayer and the support of friends and loved ones we will be ok. I will pray for you, stay strong and take care of yourself spiritually, emotionally and physically.
---Holly on 1/26/08|
Greetings in the wonderful name of Jesus I have read your blog i came about it when i was searching for helpful scriptures for a good friend of mine. Things are tough i know and believe me. God is with you always he loves you unconditional and he wants you to stay focused on him. If you want e-mail me and we will talk if u feel like it. God bless and remember Jesus Is Lord!!
---Eric on 12/31/07|
I read your message and I thought I had written it. My husband of nearly 27 years left me last year when I was 54. I will be happy to pray for you and I hope you will pray for me.
---Nanco on 8/30/07|
I am corey9447 , please contact me here, as we have a service that deals with this specifically
---corey on 5/12/07|
Dear Lady: Dont give up on your Husband. He will come back. Be full of courage.
---Jose on 5/11/07|
My husband left me last September and came home in October. I thought things were going well and then last week he woke me up and said he was in love with another woman. We have three young children together and I need some help with this. We would have been married 24 years this year.
---michele on 5/2/07|
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surround yourself with other christians go to support groups. Don't be alone to much look what is out there for group support. find out what you liked to do when you were single and start a new hobby again. Take a swimming aerobic class, very soothing, listen to christian music before bedtime. Gardening can be very comforting. and make sure that if your dpressed fro more than two weeks to seek a doctor. Don't let it go , you might need something to help you thru. Make lots of friends even male friends!!
---annette on 4/27/07|
We were married 9 years he left me for ex he divorced she commited adultry. God is taking care of me. I don't know if my hubby will come back but I know God won't "make" him. But if he don't then it is God's will and I know He has a something better for me. I still hurt sometimes cry but I am better. At first, I hated him but then I realized that God don't want me to do that. Getting the hatred and hurt out of your heart and giving your all to the Lord is the best thing you can do.
---paclady on 4/26/07|
I'm so sorry you are going thru this loss, I will of course pray for you!! I can only imagine after that many years. I too was left this past December before Christmas, I am 31, and have 2 young kids...oldest is 4 and baby is 18 months, and we are actually going thru the divorce now...it is terrible, but lean on your faith..it will never leave you!! I'm praying!!
---Wendy on 4/17/07|
elisa so sorry that you have been abandoned by your husband i'm assuming that you are a christian lady Suggestion is that you belong to a Bible teaching church Go see your pastor and let him know what is going on he will pray with you and council you Keep your eyes on the Lord for He will never leave you or forsake you Get into the Word of God believe what He says about you This is a tough time for you but you can make it with God at your side your christian friends holding you up in prayer Be strong in His might and power He will always see you through Ill be praying for you shear3487
---shearon on 3/10/07|
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Be tender with yourself, my husband has left me after 37years of marriage, I still cannot believe it, although it has now been a year, but what time is that after a lifetime together. I do not have answers, but hold on to your faith and good friends and trust God for your tomorrows. Take one day at a time and remember He will never leave you or foresake you. God has promised this and He cannot lie.
---Be on 9/19/05|
My dear friend, I have read your story, and theres one thing you should always remember that God is faithful to fullfill His promises, In Timing, by His Method!!!! God Timing is perfect is Perfect. We may not understand His Timing, But we must yield to to it!!! In essence, God might be trying your faith and now is to give your all and trust him to the end.
---Esse_Blessing on 6/9/05|
I believe that is happening so much now with Christians in 40's and 50's. It happen to me. Been alone is hard. But there is so many things now that you can do that you couldn't before. Now you have time to really read Scripture to be prepared. But keep good friends around you. Many here would love to help, reach out to them and God will use them to carry you through. Your purpose is not done yet, you have much to do. Pray for you husband with your heart and God will reward you even more, Plus there will be forgiveness in you.
---Lupe on 5/9/05|
So very sorry to hear of this situation. My wife and I have been married 41 years, and there were ups and downs but we relied on God and He helped smooth everything out. We raised 2 fine daughters. A couple of years ago we got to go to Christian marriage seminar, and I urge every Christian couple to do this. It was very uplifting and I find that I love my wife even more than when we were first married. God will never leave you nor forsake you. People will let you down, but God never will. He will give you comfort through this terrible ordeal. We will pray for you. Cameron
---Cameron on 5/7/05|
Mary: sometimes men do leave perfectly good marriages for someone younger, or prettier, or shapelier than the woman to whom they are married. These men don't need an excuse. They are driven by lust. Do not blame this woman here for her husband's behavior. I grow so weary of people making excuses for poor behavior on the part of a spouse.
---Madison on 5/6/05|
I can only imagine how sad you must feel, but time and God's help, and His place in your life, ease the pain. You may discover a "new" you, as well, and become your own best friend. It won't be all bad, something good will come of it, but it hurts now, and I understand that. Want my help? I'm Krist8654. Do write if you need a friend. God bless.
---Kristine on 5/6/05|
I am going through exactly the same thing and this was my second husband who found himself a lover and decided to leave me for her, men think by going to a new relationship things are going to get better for them, when in fact is not true he needs to change himself because he is just going to make the same mistakes with the 3rd or 4th one if God is not with him. We as women tend to be strong and you are going to be fine, just like I will be after we find our perfect match keep faith it will happen, be positive and say to yourself you are going to be just fine.
---Ines_Anderson on 5/6/05|
Mary ... sometimes they do, you know.
---Alan_of_U.K. on 5/6/05|
Sister, be strong. I sympathize with you. Consider this as a storm coming to your life. But take note that storms won't stay forever. Storms would soon go. I pray that you will remain standing even during and after a storm. Hold on fast to the Hand that has been carrying us through.
---linda6546 on 5/6/05|
my sister, I am sorry for what you are going through at the moment; but a husband don't just leave after 27 years. did you do anything that would cause him to look for another woman? I don't really listen to one side of story; he has his side too. pray about your crisis and i will pray with you.
---mary on 5/5/05|
Sometimes the Lord rids us of 'burdens' in our life so that we can become closer to Him. His purposes are a mystery but everything in His name works together for good. Time will reveal this to you and you will look back and say - now I understand. It happened to me and I look back and say 'praise the Lord' - Psalm 23 kept me going and may it be a comfort to you at this time. Jan
---Jan on 5/5/05|
My dear friend in Christ
Humans can be selfish. At least your children are grown up. I'm the sole carer of a 29year old disabled son a.live with my 85yr old mother. A hobbie might help you at this point in time. I am feeling alone too. My son is very ill again a. doctors don't seem to care. You and I must learn to rely more on Jesus,friends a.prayer. I'll say a prayer for you as well, a friend in Jesus Anne
---anne6984 on 5/4/05|
Dearest Sister, my heart is with you in prayer. I know how your feelings are at the moment. I was left behind with four young children to raise. I have sought God's peace, strength and love in my dilemma. My kids are in high school now. Am peacefully happy and forgotten the past. Have courage sister, we are serving the Living God who sees all life surpasses. Isaiah 40:31a, "Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength". Beneath His Wings of Love may you hide and be comforted..amen
---Julie on 5/4/05|
My ex left me four years ago...A few months later all three of my kids moved across country, to new lives of their own. For the first time in my life, I have been alone. It has not been easy. But, God has been faithful. My best friend gave me a verse that I have clung to and cried to God to at night. "For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord, "Plans to prosper you, not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future." It has helped me.
---Madison on 5/4/05|
It is my humble joy to pray for you sister. Stay in the Word, read all of God's promises to you, HE will mend your broken heart. Time will pass and you will heal. I was alone for MANY years, I got married almost 2 years ago to the one God had chosen for me. There is life at our age Sis! If you care to talk, u can write me at my penpal address:barba7434. God bless.
---NVBarbara on 5/4/05|
I understand, I just filed for divorce from my husband, I guess he has been seeing other's behind my back...but I am preganat w/ his baby.
---creasa on 5/4/05|
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I was 55 when my husband left me, after 33 years. I thought I couldn't make it alone; my four children were grown and gone. Now, after 5 years, I am happier than I have ever been. I lean on the Lord, and He has lifted me up. I joined a single's group and 3 Bible Studies,and have made some good friends.see God brings us through the rough times, He will continue to protect us. Whether either of us gets married again is in God's hands, but I know you, too, will pull through, one day at a time. Just remember, my friend, God has promised good for us. My prayers go with you!
---Margaret on 5/4/05|
Dear Mrs, i am so sorry that your husband left you at a time like this when he should have stood by your side.I want you not to worry too much about what he has done to you after so many precious years of marriage.But just go to Christ and lay your burdens at his feet, for he told us that he would never leave us nor forsake us and he would never give us more that we can manage/bear.I hope you don't mind me calling you my grandmother it's just that i never got the chance to spend enough time with mine before she passed away.I will continue to pray for you.
---Mellissa on 5/4/05|
Email me at doroth3714 and I will give you some very good Christian information regarding your situation. It is a website so I cannot post it here per site rules.
God bless. Malachi 2:16
---Dorothy on 5/4/05|
I am sorry to hear that your husband left you for a new love. I was married 41 years when my husband suddenly filed for a divorce. Later I found out he had been sneaking off to spend time with another woman and had excuses why he had to be gone weekends when in reality he was spending them with her. I was devistated at first but things have gotten much better and I now realize how much better off I am without him. Lean heavy on the Lord and He will see you through this. I'll pray for you. June
---June on 5/4/05|
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I am really sorry to hear that. Mine left 3.5yrs ago. We have a God who is the father of the fatherless and friend of "widows". The children and I pray for him constantly because he has lost his focus. The Lord is faithful and He will make possible in your life things that were hindered before. But first gird up your loins, stand firm on your shaky legs and look up to the Lord who is the pioneer and perfector of your faith
---Benonia on 5/4/05|
Dear Sis Elisa, Sorry, but arise from your situation, life is short. Let God deal with your husband. You hold on to Jesus, our Shepherd Ps.23. Get active in church & social work. GOD WILL TURN YOUR SORROWS INTO JOY. One day you will realise how your problem has turned out for your betterment, all your potential, hidden talents would surface. I shall pray for you sister. The Holy Spirit who raised Jesus from the dead is within you and He shall lead you into peace and joy. Your sons will realise they have a mother, a precious gift from God. sina4596
---sina on 5/4/05|
Praying for you but don't have any advice. Just asking the Lord to give new found strength and wisdom for the both of us.
---barbara on 5/4/05|
sister please take comfort in the lord as i did as my dad passed away and my world fell apart and i went to kill myself 1 day but i'm here by the grace of god but my wife signed me into hospital, went back home packed her bags and left me in a terrible state but then i turned to GOD and he has built my life back up i'm still single and rely on the lord god for everything and he will provide me with my perfect partner as he will for you too god allows these things to happen to us as we take our eyes off the world and focus on GOD I SHALL PRAY GOD WILL COMFORT YOU NOW take care god is with you
---alan on 5/4/05|
i will pray for you sis, im in the same situation,i know how it feels,i just rely on the promises of God,he keeps his promise,he never lie...rebuild yourself this time the way God wants you to be...hold on sis...fix your eyes on Jesus...everything is temporary,these too shall pass...lets wait for his perfect timing...he will never fail us...i will pray for you..u can e mail me if you want..God be with you...
---cherryl on 5/4/05|
Elisa, Im sorry to read about you being alone. I came home to find that my wife had left with the kids while I was at work. Many times I wanted to end the pain for good but God is great and put friends in my path to listen and pray. He has set me free and will do the same for you. Romans 8:28
---Randy_G on 5/4/05|
I am very sorry about the separation and being lonely.But Thanks to God who understands your hurts,tears and cry.He is always with you and able to help you bear your problems. And I will help in praying for you and may your husband come to his heart and come home again. this song,I hope it will help. The God of the mountain He is still God in the Valley When things goes wrong He will make them right
The God of the good times He is still God in the bad times
The God of the day He is still God in the night In Him
---Jesse on 5/4/05|
Please just take one day at a time. Get in a single women's group at your church. Where there are understanding women who have been through what you are experiencing. Life Skills by Paul Hegstrom is a great study to use. There is a website for this. Spend time with God. Get to know Him and yourself. He will comfort you and give you strength. I have been divorced for 10 years and it does get better. But it takes God to heal the heart and time for Him to work.
---beth on 5/4/05|
I too found my husband with another woman and we are now divorced. I went to a Divorce Care at my church that really helped me and made friends who where also in somewhat in the same situation. Having able to cry out your hurt and fellowship with others really did the job. You are not alone and it really made me feel good about myself. I prayed alot and the Lord got me through this rough time. I will pray for you too.
---Sophia on 5/4/05|
I am so very sorry to hear about the trials that you are going through. The most important thing that you need to is to hold on to God's hand. He does not let go, we do.
How old are your sons? I have two boys also. Stay in church, and surround youself with some solid Christain women who have been thew the trenches of life and are strong Prayer Warriors.
You will be in my prayers and thoughts. Jesus is stong for us when we do not have the stength or courage for ourselves.
---Geri on 5/4/05|
I have just finish reading your story and i feel bad cuz i come from a divorced family and many issues got involve. But just remember you are not alone and The Lord has promised that he never leave us nor forsake us. And dont feel alone that is why you have new people that enter your life everyday and i am one of them. If ever you fee like chatting you can bombard me with tons of email at the email address below. Take good care of yourself and remember you are not alone.
---Karine on 5/4/05|