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He Will Not Marry Me Quickly

A man has been talking to me for a year and hasn't married me. Should I move on?

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 ---joan4878 on 5/16/05
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\\It the topic is more than year old it is no longer pertinent for discussion\\
---Blogger9211 on 10/14/11


I totally disagree. It may not be pertinent as it pertains to the original poster, but you have no idea how many hundreds of thousands of people could be reading these blogs.

The apostles wrote almost 2,000 years ago, and we still find their comments pertinent. Maybe someone today needed to read a comment that was posted 6 years ago, and Robyns comment brought the thread to the front again so that person today could find it.

God uses us in ways we can't even imagine sometimes. Even when we post to an outdated thread

Robyn, press on and God bless you.
---James_L on 10/16/11


"talking to you"?

does he call you on the phone and have endless hour-long conversations?

is he "talking to you" for long periods DURING your dates?

have you even gone out on a date with this man?

has he expressed ideas goals and future plans with you?

many women today live inside their HEADS ....if you believe because a man is "talking to you" that he should have asked you to marry him already I would believe you live a fantasy life inside your head

it would be interesting to see what "talking to" is really about?
---Rhonda on 10/15/11


Another view: A year is not really long enough to get to know someone. I would advise you really wait for a while longer. What is the rush? Do you realize the world we live in now? If you get too desperate you might make a tragic mistake, with your life. This man may be doing you a favor! Have you checked his family relations, run background checks and so forth on this man. You better slow down,my dear. Think with your head and not your heart, at this time.
---Robyn on 10/14/11


Robyn, this was submitted May 16, 2005 the last post prior to yours was June 16, 2007 by Katie everyone else stopped posting in 2005. Do you really think he is still talking to her. Do you really think she is still waiting on him. Do you really think that any one gives a rodents posterior about a seven year old sob story that should not have ever been on ChristiaNet to start with. And reviewing you post history you seem to have a morbid compassion for recycling old blog sob stories. It the topic is more than year old it is no longer pertinent for discussion Please check the dates on post prior to commenting on them in the future.
---Blogger9211 on 10/14/11


You did not give any details on what you and he have been doing this entire year. What has he been saying and doing for a year? And you? Have you and he, even discussed getting serious during this year? Is marriage even in his future with you or anyone. You should be asking him these questions. Maybe he never intended marriage. Just wanted a female friend. Nothing serious. You need to confront him and find out his intentions. Or at the least, let him know you are interested in marriage, at some point in this, whatever it is(relationship). GBU
---Robyn on 10/14/11




I'm afraid this is a decision only you can make, but I pray right now that God will make it clear to you what his intentions are and if he is the man for you or not. In Jesus name amen!
---Katie on 6/16/07


The goal of life is not marriage but Love.God is Love. Those who function God as love are those who have finished their course in mortal love and marriage.These can understand ,and note with joy the activities that partake of a higher spirit of Love
---Ira on 6/4/05


It could be that he feels there is something that doesn't click between you two. I suspect there is a lack of communication between you two.

Talk, discuss, and clear any disagreements between you two - talk about your likes and dislikes and you may find the answers as to the why he doesn't want to marry you yet.
---Albert on 5/24/05


Well, if it was me, I wouldn't wait a year. I would come right out and ask him how he felt about me before I got too serious about him. Always make your feeling known, then you won't have that problem.
Hugs, Jenna
---Jenna on 5/17/05


Marriage is a serious, life long committment. It takes time to really know a person and develop an in-depth relationship. Following that, there should be participation by the couple in Christian pre-marital counseling. They need to know if the person is a serious believer. I have heard of couples going to counseling as long as six months. "Better to be safe than sorry" as the saying goes.
---Elsie on 5/17/05




Hi Joan,there are some of us men who prefer female friends to do things with without physical contact or any idea of marriage.If your looking for a husband and your male friend isn't looking for a wife,you might consider looking in another direction.God bless you.
---russe9356 on 5/17/05


I was that man in such a relationship. No, I wasn't interested. I was wrestling with it, primarily afraid to hurt her feelings - for two years. But how much of a man was I then - I didn't realize it would hurt her worse. I have since learned that honesty in a marriage relationship begins with transparency in courtship. Let the Holy Spirit guide you to the timing in you asking the question. The man is either clueless about your affections, or afraid you won't like his answer. Better ask now than later.
---Ryan on 5/16/05


Because a man talks to you doesn't mean interested in marraige with you. I have many men friends. I have talked to some for 4 yrs. I do not end friendship because they have not asked for marraige. If marraige is all you want perhaps you need to make that clear at the beggining when meeting men so they know where they stand. Sounds like you just want a man to ask for marraige and if they don't you do not want to "waste your time." Marraige is serious and should take time to get there.
---Shaz on 5/16/05


Hi Joan. First of all, I guess we all need a little more detail. Are you guys in a dating realtionship? What do you mean by talking? Have you guys only coversed via e-mail and phone. The most important thing is to take this concern to the Lord in prayer, and see what he has to say about it. The Lord will perfect that which concerns you. Be willing to surrender this to the lord, he will direct your paths. God Bless
---Michele on 5/16/05


What do you mean, talking to you..on line, in person, what? Has there been a promise or pledge on his part to marry? I get the impression that there is not. If you think a year is too long, then move on.
---Ann5758 on 5/16/05


you need to take your time when it comes to such a big commitment and make sure it is the right on god has for you maybe he is wanting it to be special and in gods time wait on the Lord to guide you and dont rush things
---andre9789 on 5/16/05


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