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Older Men Are Picky About Women

I have been a member of this site for a long time. I notice that most of the men, especially the older ones, are really picky when it comes to women. I am a neat, clean and God loving woman. As we age, shouldn't we become more realistic?

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 ---Zenob on 5/21/05
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After 50 most of us are blessed to even have a mate. That applies to men and women both. Most have put on weight(a lot), eyesight is not good, teeth are falling out or gone, we are set in our ways...Must I go on? How can someone be picky with this much baggage to deal with?
---Robyn on 10/15/07


All Men should be picky about women. Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concibines and said that of 1000 women he found none righteous. In the same tone all women should be picky: Solomon also said that He had only known three righteous men: Probably Seth, Enoch and Abraham.
---TS on 3/26/07


Reno - Oops, sorry about that. My response should have been directed to Steve. Thanks for pointing that out.
---Helen_5378 on 3/26/07


Please let us not revive Steve/Curt's contributions. They were sick the first time around, we don't need to go through all that again.
---m.p.a. on 3/26/07


Helen, you're talking to the wrong person.
You need to read all of the blog.
I was giving a direct quote from steve, see the date and name at the bottom, the last sentence.
Look before you leap.
---Reno on 3/25/07




The only requirement my friend Bob who is not a bad looking guy, has. The woman must be breathing. That's not being too picky. If he see's a woman and she's inhaling and exhaling, he's there.
---Jerry on 3/25/07


Men seem to forget that they also aged and grew a paunch and bald head. Yes, I would expect a Christian man to be a bit more mature and to have grown in Christ and realize that since no-one is perfect, to rather look at the soul.
---Junia on 3/25/07


Reno - ("my girlfriend is 43 lives with her husband in dundee scottland has chrones bowel cancer and diabeties. am i insane?") -- No, you are not insane. You are living in sin because she is married. Get your own girlfriend who is not married. God calls it adultery.
---Helen_5378 on 3/25/07


Steve/Curt's advice wouldn't hold up in kangaroo court.

my girlfriend is 43 lives with her husband in dundee scottland has chrones bowel cancer and diabeties. am i insane?
---steve on 2/6/07
---Reno on 3/25/07


Could you define "picky" a little further.
---darre7337 on 3/25/07




If a woman doesn't wish to live many years as a widow. she should marry younger man as men have shorter life spands. my grandmother was 16 grandpa was 41 [when married] she was a widow for 35 years. took care of him many years before that.
---Laure5469 on 8/10/05


, older men belong with young women. that is the way it is supposed to be. what could possibly be wrong with that?
---steve on 8/3/05


my parents didn't say marry rich they said marry a good christian man, but just as a man can lose their riches my ex lost his love of God. I can say I am happier single now then I was 7 years ago, and happier then a married person 8 years ago. but as you say... picky is good if you are looking for the best. not settling. but not if it's not realistic
---Laure5469 on 8/1/05


Benjamin Franklin said once that it's better to make an older woman happy than to make a young woman miserable. Doesn't any sensible man care more about being happy than about having a trophy? I'm 29, but even I know that much, and always have. So I can't believe everybody is shallow, or even most people.
---Billy on 8/1/05


Oh, this Blog is being "resurrected"! Is it because of Steve or of Ken? Or is it because of the topic? Well, happy blogging to all!
---linda6546 on 7/31/05


I hope that you know you reap what you sow.#1 my mom married some one 7 years younger. she use to run circles around dad. but now he doesn't go to many places as he cares for her.#2 my husband and I were the same age when we married, I still looked good, at 35 he left me for a "different" model. she drove him to bankruptcy [20 year olds tend to not be wise with money] #3 younger partners want kids. My Ex also has 2 more then ours, He misses sleeping.
---lauren on 7/31/05


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Some truth to most things. Maybe most sincere, real, "born again Christians", and others on most websites have "dings" caused by age, etc. Hence, here we are!

Looks, appearance are factors, reflecting one's inner self, security, etc as a rule.

My car has "dings" [not my doings], but I remember how it was before & how it's going be to again.

High mileage can be good, just as low miles can be bad! Depends on the car!

CARRY ON, Good stuff!
---bob6749_[Elishama] on 7/31/05


If a man or woman is being "picky" perhaps this is the issue. However, I have met those who are looking for someone younger and better-looking just to have a "show-piece" on their arm. I feel sorry for those people as they are shallow and must be terribly unhappy. Man looketh on the outward appearance but God looketh on the heart. A pure relationship looks at the heart.
---marya4586 on 7/31/05


On pickiness, looks, etc, to me looks are not an issue - but size, athleticism are. Not because the man is not a good person but because I'm a very active and health-conscious person. I've dated large men who were wonderful people but I was "lonely" as they couldn't join in many activities with me. References to healthy lifestyle were taken as affronts to their personal habits, but it's merely my lifestyle.
---marya4586 on 7/31/05


yes. but do we? I am single and alone but only God can fill that hole for you friend.
---matthew on 7/31/05


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I want to see Steve's pic also!
---sue on 7/31/05


Ken,
I deny it for me and my family! But it seems quit true, some people sound very shallow to me lately.
luv,
sue
---sue on 7/31/05


After reading what Steve has said, I am ashamed to be a man.
---Alan8869_of_UK on 7/31/05


Steve I find your attitude very unchristlike... "would a man eat something that was left in the fridge a month ago? i doubt it. so why do we expect men to settle for women who have lost their looks? steve on 6/7/05" reducing woman down to expired food suggests you have no respect for woman or for their capabilities and purposes in life except their physical appear to men!! Hmmm, you sound like true Godly marriage material I reakon. You must have woman queuing for you....
---lisa on 7/31/05


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Yes Curt/Steve, some men would eat something that had been in the fridge a month.

Just about like a young woman would take a second glance at a man who had lost his looks-going ONLY by your presumption.

I would hope most men AND women are mature enough to not judge a person on looks alone.


Is your picture in the penpal area? I'd love to see it!May I have your penpal address?
---NVBarbara on 7/30/05


So Sue, do you deny the reality that what I wrote is based on fact?
---ken on 7/30/05


As a confident woman of God, waiting on God, I admire men who are 'picky' about choosing their mate. Not picky for personal or worldly reasons, but picky as in waiting for God's will! Added note:Satan has way of making what 'seems' realistic 'seem' righteous. Ask Eve!
---tina5643 on 7/30/05


So Ken, men and women are both shallow. Men like only pretty women and women like only rich men. Sad.
---sue on 7/30/05


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part 2
How many
of us fathers have had our ears pinned back because we dared to try to teach our
daughters that their beauty is in their hearts not in a makeup bottle. "You
dont understand what it is to be a woman", the echo of these words ring
very hollow when I read a blog like this.
---ken on 7/30/05


Part 3
Young men are attracted to pretty girls and older men to attractive women by our very nature. True there are exceptions but by and large most men dont ogle the obeese and disgusting. I dont see why we should change the rules simply because a woman looses their beauty. Before you lable me a misogynist think about what I wrote not just your feelings
---ken on 7/30/05


Part 1
Funny thing, when a woman has her youthful looks decent men are boring unless they have money. Younger women seemingly are attracted to money, bad boys and last on the list is a good man. How many times have we all heard little girls being told that they should marry a doctor or heaven forbid a lawyer.
---ken on 7/30/05


, okay ladies, let me ask a question. would a man eat something that was left in the fridge a month ago? i doubt it. so why do we expect men to settle for women who have lost their looks?
---steve on 6/7/05


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Thank you, Jerry! Kindly post your picture please. Some women are picky to. According to types the say in the other blogs. Now ladies, we have a man revealing his identity. please check the profile of Jerry. I am quite sure I won't compete with you. God Bless You All!
---linda6546 on 6/1/05


linda6546 here is my user name Jerry9753. Now you can check me out and no I do not have a picture posted, can't decide with or without a beard.
---Jerry_9753 on 5/31/05


My advice, is to leave the past behind. don't expect that the first guy is the one God send. Enjoy each other, and if he is the one then let God take over. Don't be in a hurry when you do meet someone. Give God a chance to work in both of you. Decisions like this are so important. There is a lot of nice guys out there. God will point the way.
---Lupe2618 on 5/29/05


She enjoy going out to different places. she never once talked about how terrible her husband was and how he abandon her and the kids. Not one thing bad. She was free to start a new with whomever God brought to her. I don't know what or how it took place but I know God had a part in it. I know the struggle of each single person because before when married I never even thought about single people. I know now how much we need each other. For friendship or to just tell someone your struggles.
---lupe2618 on 5/29/05


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I was told by another sister that is a friend that the women I had dated had been along for over ten years. That sometimes they are so careful because they worry what the rest of the church will say, or think about them. Some have become bitter and have never left their past behind. Though they are wonderful ladies. I finally met someone from another church through another sister and she is ten years younger then me and had been a single mom for eight years.
---Lupe2618 on 5/29/05


after about a six months I was told by a sister someone was interested in talking to me so I called her and later we went out and she was never satisfied with anything either. We went to a fireworks display and she hated it, after I took her to a nice place to eat and she just didn't talk. On the way home she asked me why I was not talking and I told her maybe I just didn't know what her choices were and she would have to tell me. And nothing worked. I began to think why is this happening?
---Lupe2618 on 5/29/05


Hi sister, I will tell you my experience and take it for what its worth. I am a widow and at my church I finally decided to ask someone out to dinner. She was about my age and everything I did for her didn't seem to be good enough. She would call me and I would take her out to another place or to the beach and she didn't like the beach and always acted different then at church. after trying for a while I just gave up.
---Lupe2618 on 5/29/05


I have posted an answer to this blog last May 21. I checked the penpal section using the random search as directed by the webmaster. I found that the ladies we have here are all pleasant to the eyes. Sorry for my earlier reply. But I found something: There are very few men(with pictures)on the age bracket of the older women. This might be the cause why some women stayed long in this site but still not meeting yet their internet mate.
---linda6546 on 5/28/05


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Hello, Jerry: I have just checked your profile. It says: "Jerry is no longer a member". Give us your identity so that we can check your profile. I think some ladies are interested with you, that is, if you are still available. Count me out, of course. I am just doing a "good deed" for others.
---linda6546 on 5/28/05


Ladies all men aren't looking for a woman that is 20 years younger than themselves. Check out my profile to see what I am about.
---jerry on 5/26/05


What was important to me is to find a good wife and I did find one 10,000 kms away and with God's help, we got together and we are now married.

She had also been an instrument in God's hands to lead me back to Him. It is imperative that relationships are taken very seriously and built on true love and dignity.
---Albert on 5/22/05


Actually, I have encountered many, many younger men wanting to strike up conversations and meetings with me... even between 20 and 30 years younger... LOL. I could never be interested in dating someone that young!
---Janet7433 on 5/22/05


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I've noticed that there are also many men who list themselves as average body condition on their profile, but when you see their pic they are very large! Then they write that they want a young, slim and fit woman! Well guys, if you think a young, fit woman should overlook your 'aged unfitness', why can't you do the same with women?!?!
---Janet7433 on 5/22/05


men wake up to urselves if u ain't got the loot younger women will boot .. as soon as the cash is dry it's goodbye. get someone who will care about u and not just 4 what u got or ain't got in many cases .. there r plenty of genuine women out here
---ellen on 5/22/05


I have noticed that the older men who say they want penpals will write for a while and then disappear. I am an intellegent, well-informed woman and have yet to figure out what these older men are seeking.
---marga3984 on 5/22/05


Zenob, don't be quick to judge. I married a younger woman reason is because I'm still in a very good shape and excellent health, thanks to God.

When I challenge her for a race, I always win. I also climb the stairs 2 at a time and she one at a time. Perhaps I should have married an even younger wife :))
---Albert on 5/22/05


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I have to agree with you ladies, I have seen the same thing, I too see men asking for younger women and skinny and athletic ones, well these guys are not any better looking,but they sure need to grow up. I know not one place in the Bible that tells these men to look for younger ones.Will guys wake up is it on the outside or the inside of what your looking for ? I would just pass these guys up and look for ones that take you for what they see in you. Hope this helps. You in my prayers.
---abby7367 on 5/22/05


I too am finding the same thing...I am a nice looking 53 year old widow and when I look for someone I want to know that they are honest and godly more than I want to know that the man is drop dead gorgeous and handsome....men need to think about where their priority lies....is it to have a godly woman or find someone who is gorgeous and worldly and does not possess an ounce of personality......
---Fran8674 on 5/22/05


so what's wrong if men in general and the older ones in particular are picky about their women friends. i believe its a personal choice one makes and one cannot set rules about the kind of women or men one has to pick. moreover if an elderly man wants to stay young at heart and mind, let him have a younger lady to bring out the youth in him provided the friendship is mutual.
---olive on 5/22/05


I agree with you but I may be different. I have been on this site for a while but surprised,only younger ladies 20 to 30 younger send beautiful loving cards. Whenever I have objected to their move, they have insisted,"Age does not matter,love is the most important in a relationship". Do you agree with that answer? I differ. Haven't you got mails from younger men claiming the same factor?

Humanity is the same, be old or young, every one has his or her own preference.

Jimmy
---Jimmy on 5/22/05


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We're not all as picky as you might think. Maybe those profiles you looked at are prideful men, I don't know. I just know that if I found a good Christian woman to stand by my side I would cherish her for the rest of my life. It really is the heart that makes a true woman of God, not the looks or the way of dressing. Then again...maybe I'm just a dinosaur.
---Neil on 5/22/05


Someone asked me to define "picky". I think that question has been answered. I expect young people to still be in search of a baggage free Barbie doll, but a life well lived has its own characteristics and as a woman who has "been there", I find that I am forgiving of flaws and mistakes. We all have them...and after fifty...who looks like a doll or a Denzel for that matter? God has given us the gift of life...why not be realistic?
---Zenob on 5/22/05


Hello ladies, am not kidding this time. We have to accept the fact that a "rose that has just opened" is more beautiful than th one that is "about to wilt". There is a competition out there in relations to looks. Only few men goes for the "Proverbs" women. Most men, young or old, goes for someone who is beautiful. Just pray that the "few men" available would finally see the beauty that is in you. God bless you.
---linda6546 on 5/21/05


Hello ladies: Just to inform you that men age "slowly" emotionally. That is, they might be old physically but their "emotional age" lags behind their chronological age. Thus, he may look like a "grandfather" but actually he is a "kid". Am kidding!!! Don't get mad against me gentlemen! No offense meant!
---linda6546 on 5/21/05


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Don't feel alone, there are men asking the same questions of the female gender and their picky ways about who they want for a mate. I don't qualify because of my age, my looks, don't make enough money, maybe not exciting enough, or just don't have class. Where do we plow through this mess to find that special person? I don't want to raise my mate, nor do I want to educate my help mate. Just someone called of God to work along side of me, doing God's work. Wow! what a picture. lol
---Blue on 5/21/05


Favor is (deceitful, and beauty is vain) but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. Prov 31:31 Sometimes it seems like when men or women go for much younger spouses, they are trying to recapture remants of youth. Which tells me, they really don't have God in mind, and are looking for pleasures. Look deeper then the outside, for that is where the treasures lay.
---anon on 5/21/05


I truly believe that the younger one's that they are searching for, can truly come out in an older woman also. They are really looking for something to make them feel better about themselves, which can only come from God anyway. He can truly fill that void, or empty space, like no one can, young or old. But that's just my theory.
---rhond7565 on 5/21/05


I agree. Whenever I have checked any male's requirements, they seem to want only young, trim, very athletic women, usually 20 years younger than they are. Shouldn't they be looking for the Proverbs woman?
---melia4334 on 5/21/05


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Zenob....i 2 have been a member for some yrs , and if you notice most of these men are looking for Wonder Woman or Barbie ...and they cannot understand why they get took and lied to because they go for the younger ladies thinking it will restore their youth .......Brothers wake up ...us women that are aged and more mature are wiser.
---Lea on 5/21/05


In reply to that comment about older men, yes i agree, most older men are very unrealistic most are looking for a female half their age, I am wondering what they are trying to prove to themselves.
---Diane on 5/21/05


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