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Move On After Broken Heart

I have rather complicated question. How do you let go of someone you love, you know its over, but in your heart it's as if nothing ever changed. I know you never get over someone you love but how do you move on?

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 ---Karen on 5/24/05
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Are you married to the person? Are you divorced from the person? If you are seperated or divorced, there is still hope of getting back together. If the person has married someone else, skip it. What other interests do you have? May be you can find liberation in something else. There are Bible stories of women remaining widows after their husbands died. NO REMORSE in not marrying again. Instead they were devoted in the Lord. May be what you will really like is to surround yourself with children or to visit people in the hospital.
---born on 3/24/13


Love yourself and everything will work out.
---Ann on 3/21/13


Moderator permit- Thankyou! Almighty God, first let me say how good you have been inspite of it all you have shown me, you heard my cry, you hear my call. God bless our new Pastor Raul give him, guide his footsteps, be the eyes, ears, hands that steer the vehicle for his has to commute from another state to get back and forth, help him find the right home here & bless his wife & children. He seems very serious about the things of God. Bless our bible class, thankfull for his understanding about my condition.Lord jesus, you know I am not giving up! There will be better days, thankyou for all you are doing. No suffering is grievious, you died for me the least I can do is worship never forget your sacrifice.amen.
---ELENA on 2/20/13


Don't rush it. Take life a bit easier. And get plenty of rest. Could be one day someone will show-up, and will make you forget.
---pat on 10/26/12


Family,Bro.Elder said the best thing here! We women got to wake up. And. Wise up! Stick to love God first,your kids,love yourself value and care for yourself and begin to really pray God help you not be. So Needy, help heal that Loneliness. you and pray, pray,pray ..God has someone for you but,we got to PUT GOD! First!
---ELENA on 10/26/12




It takes some time, but time heals most things. After a heartbreaking divorce, I finally went out into the world and unsuspectedly fell in love again. He was the light shining under all the pieces of things fallen apart in my world. And in less than a year, that too ended, again I felt broken. Every night that goes by I miss him, every day he's in my thoughts. My heart recovers slowly.
---Angel_R on 10/11/12


i am so sorry. i was unfaithful to the Lord and i broke someone's heart. i am deeply sorry. i miss the emotional connection with him. now i cannot think about his smiling face. it hurts. it hurts to see the image of his face crying. please God help us to move on.
---maybe381 on 8/24/12


I'm going through the same thing now, break up with the father of my child after 4 years...but I must say that God have been my cormforter so far...He said that I know each and every hair on your head and I knew what you are going through before you even went through it...What I'm saying is that everything works good for thos who love the Lord...He has greater and better things for us...Rom 8:28
---Cathy on 8/2/12


Yola and Karen never be a woman that needs a man. Be a woman that a man needs and respects.
Do that and your problems will clear up. Let the Word of God set your standards.
---Elder on 6/23/12


hi , i hate having broken heart its now 3 weeks i keep crying and crying every single day i try to meet someone but afraid instead of concentraiting on guy i will think one i miss and end up with tears
---yola on 6/23/12




Hard one indeed! The one I'm thinking of now is not a lover but my late brother. I can't just stop thinking about him, not ready to yet either. I want to keep him close to me in some small way. I cherish his memory, only deeply wish I could put my arms around him again. Heaven is coming, though. :)
---Mary on 12/11/11


I know it's hard and I have something about love that's devastating too.
you just have to stop thinking about him and start texting other guys. I'm sure that one day you'll fell in love with the guy you're texting. make sure you did it with the right guy :)
---Kristin on 12/7/11


I wish I knew.... I was in a relationship with a man for a year - nearly 2 years on I still think about him.
---Colleen on 7/31/11


With patience and time. Time really is a great healer, To be in love and get hurt is no fun. Hope you don't take too much time wondering... everyday is a new day and God designed sunshine after every storm.

No matter how long it rains there will always be a brighter day. The WARMTH of the sun on your face is like the kiss of God on your cheeks and the beautiful flowers in summmer is like a scent filled picture, there will always be joy that come after many a sadness.

the best part of losing someone is the overwhelming comfort God brings in the healing, the getting better.
The HOPE.

God bless you hope you see the rainbows that appears to remind us of the Promise. The brighter picture is always after the storm.
---Carla on 5/19/11


Faith, (What a great name!) A few years ago I felt as you do. Every day, every hour, was painful. Allow the Lord to be your comfort, go to Him, weep, cry out all you feel. He will carry you through, he is faithful, and He is our Comfort and stremgth in times of trouble. I know it may be cliche, but time and especially God, will heal. Ask for prayer, those who love the Lord will want to pray for you, for your healing, . I wil be praying. may God bless you.
---Christina on 5/19/11


I wish I knew...my heart is breaking..and all I want is to sleep and not wake up!!
---faith on 5/17/11


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I dont know ive been asking myself the same question for a while now .realy dontthink i will ever be over her our are the divorce even thiugh my daughter has come to live with me i still miss her
om even more .I pray for God to enter her heart and reconcile us ,but im afraid it mght not be Gods will. How can a family dieing be a part of Gods will. One thing i know for sure is im gaonna love her for a long ,long time.
---ray_van_schuyver on 4/21/11


letting go is giving someone freedom..i believe if the person really loves you-he will come back again in your arms.while being clueless about the future-start forgetting the person.switching your mind to other things than him will help.look for some things to do that will interest u.
acceptance is the key to moving on..
---mj on 12/27/10


Yes, it is possible to get over someone you love. It just depends on why their was a need to end the relationship. In my experience the evil woman was adulterous, so I had to end it. It is like cutting off one of your members from your body, necessary, but the horribleness of losing everything and the children being kidnapped is better than the horribleness of staying together when they are continually fornicating with others. I seen the future at the throne, and she is rightly cast down into hell.
---Eloy on 12/27/10


I too know that my relationship is over. My boyfriend and I live together with my son and he sees other people! one day he tells me he loves me the next day he's with another woman. I'm leaving for my own santity. Leave for your own sanity! Move on. If you've devoted yourself to this person as I have and they don't appreciate having you in their life, don't wast another second of your life on them. Move on to someone who will. They are out there and work on yourself! You are worth it!
---Lisa on 12/26/10


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You never let go of love,but you can move on.If you always look back youll stumble.Look forward thats the way to Gods kingdom.First seek the kingdom and all WILL be added!Thats GODS promiss not mine.notice HE said WILL be added.GOD created all,so that means he has all to offer if we seek and put him first we WILL have more blessings than we can comprehand.GOD bless!TO GOD BE THE GLORY!Each morning wake up say"TO GOD BE THE GLORY!"then ask with a smile what blessings do you have for me today!some of them will be trials.trials are actually blessings.a trial gives you the chance to put god first by saying"my situation sucks but thank you GOD for the blessings that ARE to come!"what has been taken shall be restore 2fold
---keith on 10/30/10


karen,my first wife,the mother of my 3 daughters,was the real love of my life.loosing trust in her nearly 38 years ago and the first decade afterwards was the hardest thing I ever went thru.The real issue is it has made me very cynical,and basically useless in any personal relationship,my trust for anyone died.
---tom2 on 10/29/10


love is the happiest thing in the world that could happen to anyone, anytime, anywhere. love may let go, but it will never disappear if it's true. it's fate telling you to give your self a break, have fun, and be free to be sensual. love expresses nothing but mystery, always taking a deep breath to every word uttered in return for the smiles received. love is never selfish, it is kind and hopeful, it is only because human touch that it becomes deadly, it can hurt and maybe kill..but one thing's for sure, we must accept love in whatever form it appears because we become better individuals who trust God to give us the right one at the right time, at that very spot to give that never- ending smile:)
---antoinette on 10/29/10


Yes they do Alan. Ive noticed at least one person waiting for the 74th post , just so he can get the last word in and feel like he's won the debate.
---JackB on 10/12/10


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Find someone else OR
let someone else find you
---francis on 10/12/10


alan8566_of_uk:

I'm of a mixed feeling about this. On the one hand, it's annoying when discussion is abruptly cut off at a certain point, giving one person the last word with a subject that is unresolved. On the other hand, in many subjects, the topic ends up straying to a side-issue that was brought up by one person (and needed to be addressed) but was quite off-topic for the blog in question.
---StrongAxe on 10/12/10


Do you think the 75 post limit is too limited?
It often seems to close the blog just as points are getting interesting?
Or is it CN think that by then people will be getting angry with each other, so they close it?
Do some people time their reply in order to have the last word? Often I detect the last post is a rather nasty one directed at another.
---alan8566_of_uk on 10/12/10


JackB:

They keep coming up all the time. However, in recent years, blogs are now limited to 75 comments and then closed off. Eventually all the old blogs will be recycled, people will comment on them (and/or ask why they keep coming back), and they will all hit the 75 comment limit, be sealed off, and never seen again.
---StrongAxe on 10/12/10


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Who keeps digging up all these 5 year old blogs?
---JackB on 10/12/10


Love is something that makes your life so different. It brings out the best and worst in you. It's reasonable to feel sad when it ends. I've suffered through a bad breakup recently as well and it wasn't easy. I now see my ex everyday and he is already with someone else and it has only been about a week. I miss him everyday, but God gives me the strength to carry on. He fills the empty space in my heart. I can't lie, not all the time do I feel his presence, but I know he is there. Just let the tears fall, remember the good and bad both, and love God with all your heart.
---hannah on 10/11/10


You know I am asking myself the same ? Right now. I have been with my bf for almost 11 yrs we have 2 older children (7 and 8) and just had our third in june and I found out that he has been having an affair....with a friend of ours to top it off...oh and evn better she is now pregnant and loves him. So I wish I could be one to give u advice but when u find some that's good please pass it on because I need the help too.
---danielle on 9/5/10


I am asking the same question, i feel so much more love for my x, I do not know how to lessesn the pain that I feel right now. I just want the pain to go away...
---Buttercup29 on 6/15/10


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When we lose, we may never fully recover from the loss but we can recover enough to move on and move forward. Many of the great contributions to the world come at times when others have hurt the most from a loss because the contributors found hope. After a loss, we still have the capability to live again despite the searing pain we feel. Over time, with prayer and with a humble heart, the pain of our losing begins to heal as hope begins to restore our heart. After a loss, as a result of finding new hope, we can learn to live in new ways and live in new times, even when the new times are quite different than the old times.
---Ella on 4/4/10


It is hard to get over someone you love and as with any good thing that we seek to do we must go to God in prayer only He can help us and direct our thoughts and actions.We also have to remember that there is a process after we get over the shock,get over being mad,over denial,we have to except what has happen,didn't say you were going to like it but we do,it's all in with the process of healing in the bible when the prodical son had spent all his substance an went as low as he thought he could then he came to himself,he realized and excepted the fact.At this point is when healing can begin,but their must not be no bitterness in our heart,or there will be no healing.Dont give someone else the power over you only God
---velma7693 on 3/1/10


I have a friend who never get's over his ex-wife leaving him. I think it's a shame he allows any humanbeing to destroy his future chances for love. Losing someone is horrible however they're not God. My friend is a strong believer often sronger than me however to let any of these humans down here(lol) keep you down I've seen too much in people to give them more power than they deserve!
---Raven on 2/7/10


You need to take this situation to a higher level of understanding. Through much tribulation we enter the kingdom of God. Did you know that Jesus is supposed to be your first love. Did you ever leave him by sinning against him? Have you ever ignored his voice by the Holy Spirit as he tried to move you back into his arms and under his grace? How many tears do you think he has shed over you, and how his heart has been broken by your rebellion to accept him as lord over your life.

Well now you know how he feels!
---exzucuh on 11/26/09


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~One day at a time, sweet Jesus,
that's all I'm asking of you,
just give me the strength to do everyday what I have to do.

Yesterday's gone, sweet Jesus,
and tomorrow may never be mine,
Lord help me today, show me the way, one day at a time.

One day at a time, sweet Jesus,
that's all I'm asking of you,
help me to pray, help me today, one day at a time...
---Eloy on 11/26/09


I am suffering from the same situation, but with a little additional. I met this man that was all that I thought I ever needed. We made plans to be together and combine our families. Engaging in activity that we should not have I have conceived his child and I am due in May 2010. He now does not call or even seem concerned, he has admitted to cheating with another woman. This has been the most hurtful experience of my life! I have prayed, tried to divert my attn. to other things, nothing seems to work. Can someone help?
---Deb on 11/23/09


i dont have the answer to that one but I need the answer... so when you find out let me know because im struggling with that one too...
---Roze on 8/27/09


You should find hope in my response. I was right there with you about 6 years ago when the father of my son would not reconcile with me but chose to marry someone else. It hurt so much that I walked around with a pain in my heart so heavy that I found it hard to concentrate.

But nothing happens quickly - even the seasons take months to change completely. The only way to get over it is to go through it and that means praising God every day and asking Him to take the burden from you. I promise you....if you are willing to practice letting go and giving it to God...you will be healed.
---cathy on 7/10/09


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I don't know but that is exactly what I am trying to figure out. Every day I think, I'm over it now, and then something hits me and I fall apart. I just don't know.
---Annie on 7/7/09


Dated 2 yrs. He got saved last year. i've been saved for 15yrs. I'm 25 he is 29. one afternoon we were in his car and saw a gentleman struck by a bus. we stopped to help, the injured was leaning on a parked car. the owner of the parked car came out started cursing and pushed the injured off his car, i started cursing him back, flipped out and kicked his car. My boyfriend said that we were over, i was a poor reflection of him and the two years together were negated by this one time event. God keeps me going but it is hard. The only thing my ex wants to do is bible study which is a blessing but he wont address our issue or take me back and says he doesnt care if i dont want to wait till he is ready to take me back. Help.
---Lysa on 6/23/09


i knw its really hard to move on when the love is still their.. but your not helping yourself if you continue loving that person, think of yourself, its not him who will get hurt but its you.. just think that there's a reason why you have to let go be hurt.think positive and im sure this experience will make you a stonger and better person. its not the end of world.. who knows you will encounter much more loving person...cheer up
---jewel on 6/23/09


Well I had this relation..I belived she was the one..spend days night every second of my life for her.Every day she told me she would never live without me....The being born in India means we had families who are supposed to let us marry finally she came to me and told her parents wont let her marry me and she cant marry me..Today am empty..wishing everyday she was back..Feeling will i ever be able to love ever again..Lost without words
---Sun_and_it_rays on 6/19/09


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Hey, I recently went through a break up myself I was convinced he was the one but guess what he had other plans.. and than he would want me back I went back and then he wouldnt need me.. I felt like a yo-yo and that shouldnt be.. I believe God has more than one person out there for you but we just have to be patient also when other people ask about you guys just say whats ment to be will be you dont have to go into the whole story because thats like reopening the wound.. Trust in God he will supply your needs.. I know its tough but at least you can figure out what you want you dont have to arrange your day around someone elses plans..
---Vanessa on 6/15/09


My boyfriend recently split up with me, due to the fact we keep putting one another before God and I understand how we need space to grow in the Lord apart. He says wants to be with me in the future, and wants to see if it's God's will for us to be and so he has to treat me as a friend for now, and as a result, all emotion towards me from him has gone. I love him, but isn't the way he's going about things slightly unfair to me?
---R on 5/25/09


I know what you are going through. My girlfriend just broke up with me.I thought we were great together,got along awesome,never fought and always had fun together.She even told me we were great together.The problem with us was she was recently divorced in an unhealthy,corrupt marriage.We hooked up too fast for her,but we got along soo good,I thought she could be the one I would marry down the road.She still talks to her ex which makes it hard on her with what she has been through.I too am really heartbroken and have been praying for God to heal her emotionally and mentally and bless her and to have his will in my life even though I don't understand when two people love each other that much.Please pray for me also.
---troy on 3/23/09


The reality of it is hard to let go. The only thing you can do is start loving you. And erase all the pain. Think of this as a life experience. And it is not your fault. And it is not meant to be. Obviously, that person does not want it as you do. So moved on. You are suffering from heartache then face it. It will get easier each day. Speaking from my experience....Chelle:)
---Chelle on 9/15/08


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The saying "time heals all wounds" sounds trite I know. However, experience has taught me that it is very true. Your "wounds" never completely heal, they scab up, may leave scars and eventually the pain begins to lessen.You go on, but are reminded of what not to do or what to do next time when you look at the scar.
---TT on 12/15/07


Yes, you can get over another human being.
To not do so is to hold that person up as an idol in your heart. God says not to love anyone over and beyond Him.
Dwelling on another person can become an obsession and that's not healthy.

Love is really not feelings, love is a choice.
You can be in a loveless marriage as far as feelings are concerned and still love that person by honoring the commitment you made to God to love that person through good and bad.
---lovable_linda on 12/4/07


I still struggle daily to forget and move on. The thing is you can't forget when you love someone. The feelings remain but the person is gone. It's like he's died, but hasn't and my feelings remain the same. It's definitely a process of grieving and its been 15 months. My faith lies in that God knows better than I and has something better for me. I struggle just to get through each day.
---TT on 12/4/07


I found out you never realize it was love untill its gone, am still not able to get over it, anyone please help?
---alex on 12/2/07


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Dear Karen, I feel your pain! You are grieving over your loss. THIS TAKES TIME. Unfortunately, we don't have funerals for lost loves. Be sure you are a born-again Christian. If not, ask Jesus into your heart; He is our first love always. Find a Bible believing church and make friends there, read the Word of God, ask the Lord to send you a mature Christian to guide you and learn to love Jesus with all your heart. He will heal your wounds and move you on to an even better relationship. Blessings!
---Elsie on 4/2/07


The only thing you really can do is pray and ask God for guidance. you're right, you'll never forget or completely get over someone you've loved, but God can and will (if you'll allow Him) help you use those feelings to do wonderful things (including building your capacity to love others) in His Name.
---Heather on 8/10/05


understand you are important. If someone totally shattered you for his own sake. I put all my burdens in God's hands and take it one day at a time. Be good to yourself. pray give everything to God daily. I'am a survivor phil 4-7. you are precious too.
---inez on 8/9/05


I ask the same question.June20th was 2 yrs since our divorce.I have been with him since I was 15&he was 18.25 years later he says he no longer loves me&moves out to be happy. 21 months after the divorce he remarries.
---alesia on 8/2/05


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I just saw my ex with women he left me for today. he isn't going to change. I work 2 jobs and involved in childrens programs when I can. busy don't remove loneliness.
---Laureen on 5/29/05


Laureen, I'm living overseas but I have the privlege to listen to Dr Laura on the American Forces Network.I know what she would say. You have to shut the door on your ex to protect them from further disappointments.I'm sure he is your EX for very good reasons, so you must take a stand until he proves his worthiness. This action may cause him to wake up to himself but enabling him to be irresponsible isn't going to change him. Be strong and show your kids a strong female role model when their father wont.
---lisa on 5/29/05


You are right you have a complicated question,and Jesus knows the answer to that. But I found in my divorce that forgiveness was hard,but once God helped me with that,I quite letting it rule my life, busy yourself helping others,and you want have time to worry about your heart,God has plans spend time with him.
---glady5446 on 5/29/05


I am in your place right now. I have an ex-husband who knows I love him, and keeps coming back only to abandon me and our children again. He is the only man to show any interest in me. I wonder if he was the one God gave me but Ex turned back on God too. so If he is Gods chosen for me but ex denies this am I not to have some one?
---laureen on 5/28/05


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Pray Lord help me to let go of this person I love and heal me emotionally. Help me to forgive those who hurt me. I ask in Jesus name. Jn15:16 16:23,24,26 Mt6:14,15 21:22 James 5:16 It is important for you enotionally to forgive.
---Ulrika on 5/26/05


Read Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. So, the way I let go of someone I loved was to realize that God would work it out for the good of both of us. I just had to have faith in God's Word and realize that no matter what, God would work it out for my good and the good of the person that I loved. (Still do, always will love)
---Karen on 5/25/05


I think the bottom line is faith in God. Fearing that you will not find another, you settle for second best, because deep down you don't trust God to bring someone else. This is my greatest fear. Sometimes I'm strong and then my mind brings all these negative thoughts. It's a struggle dont you think?
---lisa on 5/25/05


Hope my experience will help u. After I'd stopped seeing my special friend, I got myself preoccupied with secular work n church work like evangelism. I also made new friends on the net.Memorising n meditating certain Bible verses eg:Psa 37:4-5, 27:14 helps me to focus on God instead of thinking about him. Lastly,1 has pray that someone better will come along in God's
timing.
---Karen on 5/25/05


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As others have said, you need to put yourself into new adventures and spend time with friends or make new ones. Just after I became a Believer, I fell, hard, for a girl at a Bible study; didn't even get a date with her. After coming back for a short visit many years later, she didn't even want to see me, had some weird idea I wanted to 'try again.' I had many new friends out here, only wanted to discuss the LORD; oh well.
---danie9374 on 5/24/05


I'm in the same situation, but its me who is making the decision to leave, although I still have feelings for him and he is a good person, but something is missing, and sometimes I'm not sure if its just me and that I could be making a huge mistake to leave. I'm confused and torn. HELP! and if I leave, I'm going to the other side of the earth where I live. It's a 24 hour plane ride home. I feel like I have the weight of the world on me.
---llisa on 5/24/05


From past experience, I have discovered that they get better. When you love someone and loose them, it is because they were not the one for you, if he was, you would not have lost him. The next one will be even better. I thougnt I couldnt do better than the last one but I have one now that is the absolute best, He will be with me forever.
---pat on 5/24/05


Dear Karen,

You are in my prayers. I can feel with you. Jesus is the Healer and the medical care, He takes control of everything. I find the comment of Elsie very good "unfortunately, we dont have funerals for lost loves". It would be easier to let them go, wouldnt be?. Know you are loved and we pray for you. Lilie
---Lilie on 5/24/05


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In time you will see things clearer and brighter.I would like to help more if i can. I have been in your situation before.God hasd marked someone special for you.Your last love was not the one.Email me if you like. God Bless Karen
---Lorraine on 5/24/05


Dearest Karen, When you think of your lost love, you probably think of all the wonderful, kind, caring things you did together.But if this was so true why did he walk away.Love is a mystycal condition.You can fall inlove with someone good or bad and later wonder what happened to your judgement.I am sure he was a good person, but not good enough for you or he would have never let you go, right?
---Lorraine on 5/24/05


Dear Karen! God cares for you! Give all your burdens to Him.This is a great burden,I agree,but only if you choose to carry it!YOu need to give it to the Lord.Imagine puting it in a box and giving it to God,letting Him take it.You'll be amazed how easy you will feel.just give that person to God.And He will reprace it with peace a great joy! Ask God to take it from you and don't take it back when He does take it away.Fill your heart with the Word and encaurage yourself with psalms and spiritual songs
---nigar on 5/24/05


You ask God to help you. He can "fix" all aches and pains. God bless you...from one who knows.
---Karyn on 5/24/05


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I have wondered this myself.

But everyone says - Take a step.

Some else told me - Thank God for the relationship. Thank God for the good and the bad. And some how taking a step gets easier everyday"

But the hard part is just standing still - why do you need to remember? To sulk to be bitter or to praise the Lord? To feel justified in your position? Each day you begin to forget by filling your life with new steps. Turning back turned Lot's wife into a pillar of salt.
---barbara67 on 5/24/05


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