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I Have Chemistry For My In-Law

Have you ever found yourself desiring a relationship with an in-law? Did you ever feel a chemistry with one of your spouses brothers or sisters to a point where it overwhelmed you? How did you deal with it?

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 ---phila4543 on 6/22/05
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Nah. The Mod is careful and knows exactly what's going on in these blogs.
Don't kid yourself or me, Alan.
They are privy to far more than what we see.
Behind thin paper curtains, there's a virtual Pandora's box, a paper trail of disguises, schemes, methods designed to deceive.
---Mike on 1/11/08


Stifle yourself, Edith. Stifle yourself.

There's your trouble, right there. Flesh cannot stifle itself. That's where God comes in and should stay in.
---Mark on 1/11/08


First of all no, I haven't but, I can see how you may interpret your in-laws personality traits and commomalities with your spouse as something more. Stifle those feelings and redirect to your spouse.
---rraea8898 on 1/10/08


Mike ... Over 30 months since i made that comment ... and they are still making captions which have little resemblance to the question actually asked!
They have not learnt to be more careful when they read the question.
---alan_of_UK on 1/10/08


On other occasions too a cpation has been chosen which made assumptions, and this had led to wasted time, and sometimes unwarranted criticism of the questioner, as here.

Perhaps a lesson can be learnt
---Alan_of_U.K. on 6/23/05

Yes. Lessons learned. How to spot subterfuge.

As with all subterfuge, deception by artifice or stratagem in order to conceal, escape, or evade.
---Mike on 1/10/08




This question is NOT for me. I did not choose the caption for this blog. It was a question posed to me and I wanted to hear feedback from "christians".
---phila4543 on 6/22/05

Subterfuge. It never is about "you", but a "friend". A friend with problems, problems, problems, chemistry for the brotherinlaw that destroys his marriage, numerous affairs and on and on and on.
---Mike on 1/10/08


Lovable ... Caring's observation about the date of this original question should allay your suspicions that this is the same blogger or bloggers who post problems in recents weeks and months
---alan_of_UK on 1/10/08


The original question is 30 months old and by now she has probably married her in law and got two kids already.
---Caring on 1/10/08


Every day, we see a very troubled mind that is having or had encounters with others outside the norms.
I suggest medical intervention before it becomes criminal. By your writing, it appears that your medical condition is not improving.
A 3rd degree burn requires immediate attention. A victim/predator that has a sliver of moral fiber left, will seek medical attention before your sense of what is right and what is wrong is completely bankrupt and your faith is shipwrecked.
---lovable_linda on 1/10/08


That would be a strong spirit of lust, and a general overall breakdown of your moral fiber.
You find this type of lust, "chemistry" for in-laws, brothers, sisters, when there has been sexual abuse in the family. Children of abuse can move on from being the victim to preying on others as their life goes on.
---lovable_linda on 1/10/08




Marty, you really have given others some good advice along the way.
---Mike on 1/9/08


Anytime you deal with sinful thoughts and emotions you need to bring them to the Lord in prayer. You can sometimes see some of the good quailites that you so admire in your spouse, also abide in their siblings. Don't be confused by this. Anything beyond comparing admirable traits of the two is brought from the devil and you need to turn to God in prayer and admit to yourself that is not God's way. Besides, there was obviously a reason your chose your spouse in the first place, instead of their sibling.
---Marty on 5/25/07


I would also suggest spending less time with the relative, and not being alone with them for the time being. Lift it up in prayer whenever it comes to mind, and spend time daily with the Lord. HE is our strength. It is from him that our strength comes from, and we can learn self control in him. Amen?
---Katie on 6/28/05


Phila, sorry for all the criticism. Try and look past it and take the advice to your friend of not allowing such thoughts to reign in their mind. We as Christians can take our thoughts captive through Jesus. Everytime the enemy puts that idea in their mind, they can give it to God, and go on with what they were doing. Hope this helps some.
---Katie on 6/28/05


Perhaps in the blog you should write "someone asked..."
Anyway scripturally based advice can be applied or passed along to anyone who needs it. It is a good idea to references to back up what you say, and make sure it is not taken out of context.
---Ulrika on 6/23/05


Thanks for clarifying that. Just substitute "such a person" for all the "you"s below and you will have your answer.
---Bruce5656 on 6/23/05


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On other occasions too a cpation has been chosen which made assumptions, and this had led to wasted time, and sometimes unwarranted criticism of the questioner, as here.

Perhaps a lesson can be learnt
---Alan_of_U.K. on 6/23/05


This question is NOT for me. I did not choose the caption for this blog. It was a question posed to me and I wanted to hear feedback from "christians".
---phila4543 on 6/22/05


Mat 5:27,28 1Cor 6:18 10:13 2Tim 2:22 James 1:14,15
You need to confess this to God, and repent if you want his forgiveness. 1John 1:9
Ask God the Father in Jesus name to lead you away from temptation. Mat 6:13 Luke 11:4
Our thoughts lead to feelings, and feelings lead to actions. Our actions have consequences and effect other people. One way to avoid a temping situation is to move away from it.
---Ulrika on 6/22/05


Although the Moderator has chosen to entilte this question "I have chemistry for my in-law", the question is not clear as to whether the question is about Phila.

Be that as it may ... the chemistry must be put out of mind immediately. The must know that there can be no question of feelings developing.

But I see Phila is unmarried, if it is he, he should start meeting single females not lusting after his brother's wife
---Alan_of_U.K. on 6/22/05


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It looks like your "in-laws" are the only "reachable" people for you. Why not go after outsiders? To me it's rather abnormal to "fancy" an in-law when I know I have accepted them as /sister/cousin.

Something is wrong somewhere and a trip to a councellor may be beneficial.
---Albert on 6/22/05


Hey thanks guys, you have just turned the lights on in my head concerning this "chemistry" which you hear everywhere in both christian and non christian single circles. Every one's looking for this chemistry match but its so superficial and you are right, it's glossed over lust, pure and simple. To the one who asked the question, you would do well to keep your eyes in your head and look away to your spouse. Forget this foolishness. It will lead to trouble for everyone. Don't be so selfish.
---lisa on 6/22/05


This is an inordinate affection. Le 20:17
And if a man shall take his sister, his father's daughter, or his mother's daughter, and see her nakedness, and she see his nakedness; it is a wicked thing; and they shall be cut off in the sight of their people: he hath uncovered his sister's nakedness; he shall bear his iniquity. Please get help, talk with your minister
pastor, but get prayer. Don't let this thought grow in your mind anylonger.
---anon on 6/22/05


Chemistry is a fancy word for LUST. Repent (turn from) of your lust and ask for forgiveness. Face it, call it what it is (sin) and dont give it a fancy name to make it sound like it is not your fault.
---Bruce5656 on 6/22/05


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