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My Marriage Is Failing

I'm living in hell with my failing marriage but I work in unpaid outreach ministry so it hard to make a move. I have small children and one in summer school. No child care no paying job and I want to change. Please pray for me.

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 ---TeeLee on 6/27/05
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You have a sizeable problem on your hands. You need to find paying work first. So you can survive without this person. Without this aspect of your life, you are doomed from the start. I would put this outreach ministry on hold, for a while. You need outreach, now! Contact the social services offices(welfare etc...) in your city or town. See if you can receive assistance for a while. Until you are able to provide for yourself and your kids. Go back to school,eventually, and arm yourself with education.
I am almost in a similar situation. No small kids. I work a part time job. Long time married. Also want to make a change. Things have gotten progressively worse over the past couple years or so. God bless you friend. You are not alone.
---Robyn on 6/17/10


You have my prayers
---francis on 6/8/10


As to the individual stating that God would ordain divorce, that is so far from the truth it is nearly herecy. The God of the Bible expects marriage to be held as a holy unbreakable bond between man and wife, the Bible is so clear on this, BUT , there are many situations where seperation is an exceptable TEMPORARY solution, seek pastoral marital counciling, but never ever divorce, the Bible does say when a spouse has committed adultery that you may give her a certificate of divorce and send her away, BUT our Lord Jesus said "Moses HAD to give you such a law because of your hardness of hearts"
---Matt on 6/4/10


By "hell" do you mean physical abuse? If so, then you and your children need to seek safety first. Physical abuse or not, there must be some social service type centers that specialize in helping women in your situation. You may need to let go of that unpaid outreach ministry for now and get a paying job. If you're afraid of talking with anyone outside your family call them anyway and let them know you can only talk to them by phone for now. But please get help. Maybe even your church can help.
---Ginette_Beauchamp on 2/21/08


I believe that if you talk to God and he says it's best to leave this marriage ,then you should.You must make sure that the children custody is fair.I am a Christian who believes that God doesn't expect us to be miserable in marriage and stay.The God I worship wants us Christians to have some happiness in this life!Too many of my christian brothers and sisters have this belief that God expects us to live miserable married lives.
---Lance on 2/20/08




"Moderator - If you are stating you must leave to save the LIFE of the children and yourself, then yes the marriage should end. Only you know if the statement is really true."
---lovable_linda on 12/21/07


All I can say is this, God is looking for faithfulness. You stay faithful to God and He will bring the changes around for you. God never promised His people a rose garden. Comfort, God is not into that either.
---catherine on 12/21/07


It may be time for you to quit the outreach ministry and reach out and minister to your own family.
---El;der on 12/21/07


My prayers are with you...just remember you will not be tried beyond youre capability stay steadfast and youll be a winner no situatuion is permanent with Christ in you.
---peter on 4/26/07


It appears your husband does not support you in your ministry. That would be frustrating. God can still use you. Your first ministry should be to your family, and the outreach should come second. Therefore, driving your son to summer school should be seen as ministering to him.
---Madison on 7/7/05




The hell is created because my 1st priority is to the Lord and my husband's isn't. I asked him to help with the care for the children but he refuses and since I have to drop and pick up son from summer school I can't work. The outreach ministry is blessed and I trust in God that this to shall past. Thanks to all whom replied.
---TeeLee on 7/7/05


Before I could advise you, I would need to know what the reason for the failure is, and what steps have you taken to save your marriage.
---Madison on 6/28/05


What do you do when husband wants to be married but will not expend any effort to make it work? We have no communication, no relationship what so ever. He goes to work and spends the rest of his day watching TV or with hobbies. I had next to no help with kids when they were small, I can never go to him with problems or he gets mad at me. He a Christian but acts like a child in a grownup suit. I think he just wants a mother figure. How should a wife handle such?
---Deah on 6/28/05


This only applies of there is no abuse involved. Marriages usually fail for reasons, analyze you situation and make a list of what you thing the issues are. See you spouse is interested in doing the same thing; if so, compare lists. You jointly have to decide if you both want to try to make thing better but both have to agree and really try or it will not work. If you think the marriage is going to crash and burn run you egress checklist.
---phia4633 on 6/27/05


This is some thing that my sister-in-law could have wrote. I will pray for you. I think that God loves marriage. my brother and I were not raised knowing how to care for others. he has opened his own business and is a leader in their church, this has brought pressure on him. Would your getting a paying job give you and out let? do you feel that God is useing you in this ministry? If it has Gods blessing, you should find peace. on other hand, Devil doesn't want us doing Gods will and will make us unhappy
---Laureen on 6/27/05


Could it be that you have been reaching out to help others so much that you have neglected your own? Or what is this "hell" you live in really due to?
Sounds to me like you have not supplied the basic needs of your family because you have been trying to be Mr.Nice but may be that is not cutting it anymore with your wife.You will probably have to realign your priorities and you better do it NOW! With a little more info on your part I might have given you a better answer but for now that's it
---Pierr7958 on 6/27/05


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I will pray for your marriage, that God heals and restores it, as this is His will. With God all things are possible, just have faith. If you can, see if you can get the book "Power of a Praying Wife", by Stormie O'Martian. Maybe someone where you work has a copy of it, or maybe your church. Also read Malachi 2:16.

God bless.
---Dorothy on 6/27/05


Praying for you.
---Barbara67 on 6/27/05


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