Attend Non-Christian Wedding
Would it be wise for a Christian family to attend the wedding of a Christian relative who is marrying an unbeliever, regardless of whether it is a church wedding or not?
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---Paulette on 6/28/05
Helpful Blog Vote (14)
This is an interesting question. I have 2 friends who are getting married, they are both non-Christian. I intend to go at this point, because I want their marriage to be a prosperous one, and i am willing to do whatever i can along the way to help them. I believe that if you choose to attend a wedding, you are making that agreement, and the fact that they are even getting married is a miracle. Jesus went to the weddings of people who were not yet saved (as far as i can tell). Now, if it was a Christian and a non-Christian then it might be different in the sense that if they are knowingly going against the word, and godly counsel in their decision i don't know that i could encourage that (this could get lengthy if we go down that rabbit hole)
---Micah on 6/27/16|
'there are evil spirits present and the priest envokes it'
That's obviously impossible in some cases......
Like when it's a civil wedding
Or when the pastor carrying out the wedding is a Christian
You go all out to accuse, don't you!?
---James on 11/15/11|
The enemy will devour anyone that gives him a loop hole,In those weddings there are evil spirits present and the priest envokes it,do you think that Jesus would want us around a place like that?Other religions have strict rules to abide by but its us christians that want to just go with the flow.Its time we stand out from the rest,we love our relatives but they also need to know that we are christians!Its not judging not to go for weddings,will Jesus attend a those weddings where there are evil spirits and rituals made.Will He want HIS child to be present at a those weddings?He is a jealous God,He wants us to himself.By us not going to those weddings,we set a standard, in the end they will respect you for having firm beliefs about your faith
---Jeroham on 11/14/11|
I know it is an old post.
If you still want a relationship with that person so that at you can provide wisdom and correction when needed yes you should go. Going to a wedding does not admit you agree with the decision just like Jesus at the tax-collectors house it is all about the relationship.
---Scott on 7/11/11|
The question we need to ask is this. Does Gods Word instruct us on how to respond to a fellow Christian who is knowingly disobeying God's Word by marrying a non Christian? The answer is clearly yes it does. 1 for 5 & other Scriptures call us to admonish & rebuke yeah gently a Christian Galatians 6.If they do not repent of willful disobedience then we're to separate from them to their shame regardless of the relationships involved. Read Jesus on the cost of Discipleship as it relates to obedience. He has much to say about it.Our love is to be shown to God first by obedience to His Word come what may. Agreed?
---guido on 7/11/11|
laura, i LOVE your response! Laura you are like water in a dry season, thank you for saying what you said. And to the rest here, listen....people's lives, their salvation is between them and GOD. Not you, you're not going to be judged on how effectively you've judged others and shaken your head at them. If two people are getting married, then wouldn't you rather go to a wedding that prevented fornication and all sorts of other sins than to frown on it and make the couple MORE miserable than they probably will be since being unequally yoked. I am unequally yoked, it's hard! Don't add to it. Show love, show mercy! God has shown you abounding mercy!
---kate on 7/16/08|
I would attend the wedding.Have you warned or shared your thoughts with this Christian relative on marrying an unbeliever? If so- leave the rest up to them and the Lord. Make sure you are not guilty of this offense since you profess Christianity. But don't judge your relative if he/she insists on marrying the unbeliever.
---Robyn on 6/24/08|
2. Personally, my decision would be based not just on the fact that they would be unequally yoked but also on WHERE the ceremony would be taking place. A register office is one thing, a mosque, Hindu temple, Latter Day Saints church or Jehovah's Witness Kingdom Hall is quite another and I would not set one foot inside any of those places regardless of my connection with the bride or groom.
---RitaH on 6/15/08|
So many of you think it would be showing love to turn up at a wedding in these circumstances. Wouldn't it show more love by pointing out that a believer should not be marrying a non-believer? Obviously the couple would still make their own decision about whether or not to marry but they would then realise that you had a very valid reason if you chose NOT to attend.
---RitaH on 6/15/08|
If you want to go, then go. If you don't want to go, don't. Simple really. Unbeliever - does he have a name? A life? A personality? morals? love for your cousin? You cannot look at someone and claim then undeserving because ONE thing.Don't point your fingers unless your hands are clean.
---laura on 6/15/08|
Hanna and Pierr7958: We are to be IN the world, yet not OF the world. It is not our job to judge the world. When you shop in a store do you make the clerk fill out a theological quiz or else you refuse to buy?
While Christians have the right and responsibility to correct other Christians, we do not have that right over unbelievers. Jesus spent most of his time with sinners. It was only the Pharisees who refused to associate with those they considered sinners.
---Mark on 8/10/07|
How do you know your relative is saved? and the other person is not? Does not matter. We are not the judges. I would go and enjoy myself. I once attended a Christian wedding where dancing, alcohol and revelings of all kind were going on. Now that was hard to believe. The father was suppose to be a long time Christian preacher and superintendent. The mom was suppose to be along time missionary/pastor's wife. They both were leaders in the community.
---Robyn on 8/9/07|
In my opinion, when you attend a a wedding and brng a gift you are in some way approving of the marriage and telling all who are there that you do. So, for that reason I would in mot cases, not attend.
---Pierr7958 on 8/9/07|
Sorry if this is a bit late but I felt compelled to reply since I have been in a similar situation and had to do some serious scripture searching. I hope these verses will help you as well.
1 Corinthians 5:11-12
2 Corinthians 6:14
---Hanna on 10/6/05|
Married is married whether by a Christian pastor or a judge. As to believers and non-believers getting married, it is possible that the unbeliever will eventually become a believer. People change over time and we avoid putting people into categories that are permanent. People that are Christians divorce equally with those that are non-Christians as they are no guarantees.
---lee on 7/11/05|
It would be wise to go. It would be extremely unwise NOT to go.
---Heidi on 7/11/05|
That is not a legal reason, Barbara...it may be a moral reason, but a Christian marrying a non-Christian is not illegal. I don't even think it's a sin. A Christian who marries a non-Christian will not go to hell for it.
---Ann5758 on 6/29/05|
This is a hard question. For a believer and a non believer to marry is not encouraged in Scripture. So while most of the answers talk about our love for them, why are we cheering on sin? I don't know - friendliness is wonderful, but if we decline would they stop getting married?
The decision is yours. The wedding vows usually include - does anyone know of any legal reason why these 2 should not be wed?
At most weddings, even knowing Scripture, most people don't answer or even stop weddings.
---barbara67 on 6/29/05|
Yes by all means attend. We are Christian's and what a wonderful way to show our love to them. By showing our Christian love to some one that is not is a great way to bring them into the fold of Jesus's love.
---Deborah on 6/29/05|
If you attend the wedding you show that you support them getting married. You should be honest and tell them that it is against God's word to marry an unbeliever, and you don't have a good conscience attending the ceremony.
---wes913 on 6/29/05|
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It would be wise for you to attend this wedding. It will show that you love and care for the couple.
We cannot reject someone because they are lost. We must love them to Christ.
The Christian marrying this lost person will have a hard enough time with the lost mate. They will both need you in the future.
Attend the wedding, share their joy, love them and be available for them.
---Elder on 6/29/05|
did Jesus sit with the sinners? <><
---monique on 6/28/05|
Absolutely...it's family, and you support your family regardless. What will you be proving by staying away, other than you're displaying a "holier-than-thou" attitude. Show your family member that you support (not necessarily condone) him/her, and enjoy yourself.
---ann5758 on 6/28/05|
What good are we if we just hang around other Christians? We are supposed to be in the midst of the unbelievers bringing them to Christ!
---NVBarbara on 6/28/05|
Is family member a born-again Christian? If so, the Word tells us not to wed unbelievers ... would I attend? No, because my Father tells me not to.
---Nellah on 6/28/05|
You attend family members weddings regardless. Do you want to be "right" or want relationship? Why would you not attend? I do not understand. I am a Christian and when I remarry I will most certainly marry a Christian and I am also quite certain it will not be a traditional wedding in a church. Hopefully at home and then have a big ol party! A wedding is a celbration of the love God has established between two people. To believers it is a covenant but the place has no bearing on the matter.
---rachel on 6/28/05|
Family is still family. You must show them love even if you do not agree with what they do. If you walk away and do not attend this wedding it will bring hurtful feelings and will not show christian love. Love this unbeliever to God. He will be a part of the family and I am sure you want to see ALL family in heaven.
---Marla on 6/28/05|
You should go!!! He is a non believer, but your fmily member loves him and you might have a part in bringing him to Christ. "For God came not to call the righteous, but the sinner to repetence" Like the woman at the well, Jesus did not shun her -- he accepted her and made a believer out of her.........GO Patty
---patty on 6/28/05|
I went to one just like this in April. Why not. We are sharing Christian love. This unbeliever may come to the Lord through the believing partner. It is not God's perfect plan to marry an unbeliever. Even as believers we still make mistakes, and God continues to reach out to us. Pray for the unbeliever and leave the rest in Gods hands. We can not demand others to be perfect, but we can love them.
---Linda3939 on 6/28/05|
i would not.
---Eloy on 6/28/05|
Sure, why not? Jesus did hang out with tax collectors and others who were sinners. We need to be the light of the world, and salt of this world too. I don't agree that we should always be around other christians, when there is so many, that need God.
---Susan on 6/28/05|
Someone I knew who used to go to church got married in a new age mystic ceremony. Many of her family didn't attend, but some went anyway in spite of their disappointment of her choice of a husband. Maybe it will be easier to win the non-believing spouse over since you cared enough to show up or when the marriage falls apart, the "outcast" family member will come to you for support. But, we should "avoid the very appearance of evil." Pray and ask God how to use you in this situation.
---Kim on 6/28/05|
1 Corinthians 13 defines love. Jesus said we are to love our neighbor. Would not attending put a wall between you and the new relative who is not a believer? Probably. Would attending and loving the newlyweds give a testimony of love for this couple? Probably. You need to decide what is the best expression of love in this situation.
---Madison on 6/28/05|
When Jesus ate with the tax collector (zacheus?) He wasn't saying he approved of his lifestyle. He was showing that He loves Zach and would meet him where's he at.
I'd say just love the people, go to their wedding, then pray, they're going to need it! Whether you go or not.
And really, if God looks in our lives would He see something..anything that He doesn't approve of. He's still here.
---natabelle on 6/28/05|
Give to Caesar what is Caesar's and to God, what is God's. A marriage of a relative is the marriage of a relative. Whom s/he marries is no one's business. I would go and no, by giving them a present does not mean you're condoning what they are doing.
---Albert on 6/28/05|
I say attend because God could have really something special in store for this young couple. I know a lady who married a unbeliever and he is now a Pastor. We can not judge people, only God can. PRAY for them rather then judge them. Give them support. After all they are getting married and Marraige is right in God's eyes.
---bird6363 on 6/28/05|
This is family, I think I would attend.
As a witness to your beliefs, I would enclose a card in your gift that lifts up the Lord concerning marriage.
We are here to be messengers and examples. Show your Christian love by attending.
---NVBarbara on 6/28/05|