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My Kids Don't Write Or Call

After my divorce, my children don't write, call or wish me Happy Father's Day, Christmas, or New Years. This hurts and after 20 years I don't know what to do.

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 ---Larry on 7/11/05
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I just want to took 6yrs. for my son to come around and now our relationship is great! I always thought of him on Birthdays, holidays will pay off down the road, just don't give up!!! I will be praying for you'r relationships.
---Laurie on 11/17/07

What are you waiting on? Much of it depends on how the kids see your divorce, but you need to be the one to keep in touch. You are the parent, after all. Make phone calls, send birthday cards and presents, write letters, remember special occasions such as sports and school events. I do hope that Jesus will heal the hurt within your family.
---Margaret on 3/6/07

Larry: It may not be negative but maybe they don't want to hurt anymore.My daughter told me that she got sick and cried too much when her Daddy was sick,before he died she couldn't work or think.I had to believe her.After he passed I realized that to be true for the children.I had to take full responsibility alone ,two youngest were there to help me ,and I had nurses Drs. and aids. Lulac3895
---Lula on 6/11/06

Have you thought about contacting them? They may have heard stories about you that aren't accurate and negative. So don't call thinking maybe you don't want any contact with them.
---WIVV on 8/9/05

A perfect analogy of how God feels about the unsaved and the backsliders [Jer.3:14, 22; I Jn.1:7-10]! God is The Father God of Believers Matt.6:8-13. All one can do in your situation is let them know how you feel, keep YOUR conscience towards them clear, stay available for them, pray without ceasing, focusing totally on God. Rev.21:4-7. Some healings take time, if ever. We somehow have to "Let Go & Let God"! Still another sympton of the times we are now living in! God Bless & Maranatha.
---bob6749_[Elishama] on 7/15/05

Shakespeare wrote eloquently on the sorrow caused by ungrateful children. So it's an old story.

YOU keep lines of communication open. YOU write and send cards on appropriate occasions. YOU pray for them. Maybe--and I don't know--there are resentments and misunderstandings on both sides that need to be resolved.

Ask the Lord to show you, and YOU do what YOU are supposed to do. You can't control your others--only yourself.
---Jack on 7/14/05

I have grieved to the point of being very sick. My grown children ignore me except when they want something, but go to their dad for money etc etc. I did not think I could cry as much as I have these few months.
My oldest son and youngest daughter are there for me the other three could care less. So I understand. I pray for them, that God will save them. Someday I pray the crying will stop. So I understand your pain. Hugs to you.
---anon on 7/12/05

please do not give up, i am speaking as a child of divorced and i was that way with my dad for about 3 years, he didn't write me or anything during that time either, i did alot of praying and became determined to reach out even though it was hard, now almost 17 years later my dad and are friends and talk several times a week and see other a couple of times a week. Please don't give up on them, I will be praying that God restores your relationship with them
---stephanie on 7/12/05

Keep praying for your children. God will cause them to contact you and help you to re-establish a relationship with them. Its not His will that parents and children be estranged. The bible says to train up a child in the way that he should go, when he is old he will not depart from it. my brother even if you didn't train them up in the ways of the Lord its not too late to extend the olive branch to them.
God Bless you , keep the faith
---Lola on 7/12/05

Dear Ones: Send birthday/holiday cards and answer telephone calls. Don't give up! Remember the children in various ways without overdoing it. Our children have their own view of the divorce and it may take years to heal this. It did in my situation. The Lord is in charge and the children are His property not ours. Trust Him and pray for His intervention. Nothing is impossible with God and He knows your heart. He proved it in my case and He will in yours! Be encouraged!!
---Elsie on 7/12/05

God says to honour thy mother and father. They will reap what they sow. God is merciful and He is fair.
---t3 on 7/12/05

I can sympathesize with you...after my husband passed away and I stopped handing out money to our 3 grown children they stopped having anything to do with has been 6 years now and no cards for holidays, birthdays or anything...I was good enough while I was handing out money but now mean hurts deeply but God is keeping me busy so I try not to think about it..God will take care of them at some point so I am not worried..
---fran6775 on 7/12/05

This is one reason why God hates divorce. Many times the parent with custody of the children will poison the children's minds against the absent parent. This is criminal, but there's not much you can do about it, for if they are brainwashed to think evil against you they will. Along with praying, i see two options: you can disown them, as they have done to you; or you can try to reconnect the severed ties.
---Eloy on 7/12/05

You don't make it clear whether you have tried to keep in contact with them. Is it that they don't answer letters or return calls or thank you for things you send or is it that you have done none of these things? If you havn't they might be thinking that it is you who doesn't wish to keep in contact with them. Whichever it is, it is never too late to try and change things. Ask God to show you what your first move should be to re-establish a link with them. I'll be praying for you.
---Paul_James on 7/12/05

God said in his word that if you delight yourself in Him, then He will grant the desires of your heart. God is able and faithful to restore your relationship with your children. I pray in agreement with you for God to open the door for you, give you wisdom in this situation, peace that passes all understanding, and heals your broken heart in Jesus's name. Remember Love never fails. your sister in christ
tina 7449
---tina on 7/12/05

No cards or calls during special days? Surely they were affected by the divorce. Do not wait for them to call you up or to send cards to you. The effort should come from you. Start sending them cards now. Call them up. If they were hurt, they would not respond easily. But don't get discouraged. Sooner or later they would realize that YOU ARE STILL their FATHER. Please pray too. Ask forgiveness from God if you hurt your children.
---bebet3754 on 7/11/05

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I feel for you. Doing what is left for you to do, is reaching out to them. Show them who you are. ... A father who cares about them. Start a new begining with them. Start where you are. Call them tonight. Just to say Hi, how are you, you have been on my mind and I just wanted to say hi. 20 years is a long time. But it is not over with yet. You still love them.

We love God, because He first loved us. Keep showing the love as you can often. You don't have to talk long. Just show them.
---Linda3939 on 7/11/05

John 14:18 I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.
---Pharisee on 7/11/05

Pray for them to be blessed and confess your brokeness to God.

Praying for them God deals with bitterness that could come to dwell in you.

The tears and the heart felt confession of your pain make you an open book before God, Yes he knows, but he's waiting for you so that he can restore your joy in his grace.

A man who crys first, chooses to reject anger. A man who communcates that gracefully chooses love and forgiveness.

Be that man and you'll be blessed even in sorrows.
---Pharisee on 7/11/05

Presumably you send them Christmas & birthday cards and token presents? Do you phone them? Maybe they are frightened of you, and feel hurt that you do not contacxt them.
---Alan8869_of_UK on 7/11/05

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