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Can I Pursue A Married Man

I am 28yrs old and met a man who is 18years my senior (he is 48)He has been separated from his wife for 3 years and is currently discussing a divorce settlement. Is is unbiblical for me to persue a relationship with him (1) age difference (2) he is not yet divorced.

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 ---belinda on 8/8/05
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Belinda::There are many apples on the tree why pick up one overipe with a worm or bruised from the ground.Appearances are very deceptive you are still a beautiful young woman with the world at your feet Pray, look,and dont be hasty to discard your slippers.To be barefoot I mean.
---Emcee on 3/27/08


First, I believe that it is wrong to persue any type of relationship no matter what the age. Just the fact that he's married means he's "off-limits." I've been married before & was apart from my husband for a time; however, in no way did this give way to us seeing other people. Allow him to take care of his obligations & then he's free to move forward . Until then, he is married and adulterous relationships of any kind are not pleasing to God. God bless you and direct you in all truth.
---Pam on 3/27/08


hello, first the answer to #1 is no. If you truly lvoe someone & if it is Gods wlil for you two to be together then age doesnot matter as long as you are over 18,if under that is between you & the family.
answer to #2) biblically it is a sin to be with a married person reguardless of them being seperated. If they truly wanted a divorce it would have been with in the 1rst yr & leagal aide can assist those who are not financially able to file.
---candice on 5/26/07


A nice chapter to read is Jer 42. The people came together and said unto Jeremiah, pray and inquire of the Lord what he want us to do and whatsoever he tells us we will do. Jeremiah did and gave them the word of the Lord, what did they do. They did knew what the will of God was but did according to their own hearts. I really sense this person knows that what she is doing is wrong. anyways that's between her and God. have a nice day..
---mark585 on 8/12/05


ANON: You should have said: "Yeeeessss!" or clarified your statement, because the question was: "Is it UN-bibilcal for me to persue a relationship with him?" So, you just told her it was OK instead of wrong.
---ANON2 on 8/12/05




Uh, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
---ANON on 8/12/05


Dear Sister This is a married man, please pray without ceasing God will give you a suitable person in time. Leave him alone he is married before you get hurt.
---Zandile on 8/12/05


Hey go ahead and knock yourself out. I believe even before you posted this blog you knew what to do. :-) Others have done it and got away with it, so why shouldn't you. lol.
---mark585 on 8/12/05


Plain and simple Belinda, this is adultry, and DOES not please God!
Are you a Christian? If so you KNOW better than to be involved with a married man, or ANY man in a sexual way.
Shake the dust from your shoes, tell him to move along, and OUT of your life, and repent and get right with God.
---NVBarbara on 8/9/05


He's a married man....end of discussion.
---Tammy on 8/9/05




First of all I want to encourage you in your search for someone that God wants you to spend your life with. Secondly, you need to leave this married man alone. If you are a Christian you need to find out about the grounds for the divorce and do some Bible reading on the subject. Age is not an issue unless there are unrealistic expectations about the relationship on boths sides. I am divorced and I've got to tell you if someone is going to do it they do it before 3 years passes. PRAY!
---Sarah on 8/9/05


Marrying an older man is permissable as long as you are aware there will be generational and aging issues. These become more apparent as one grows older. The more immediate problem here is that he is not divorced. Don't settle on some weak excuse just because you want to be with him. Also, don't get caught in the trap of committing adultery. WAIT! What's God's will in this?
---Elsie on 8/9/05


Age difference is not important, in this case. What is, is the fact you are persuing a married man. This is not correct! While he may be separated from his wife, and is considering divorce, he is still a married man. Even if he does get a divorce, he may want some "space" before he even considers getting married again. If this is the case, you may do more damage than good by persuing him.. All of this may be mute if you are a Christian. (That's another program.)
---WIVV on 8/8/05


As the wife of a man who was persued by a younger woman........leave it alone. There is nothing in this but hurt for him, you, his wife and especially kids if he has any.
---Patty on 8/8/05


Hello, Belinda: If you are 28 and the man is 48, then he is 20 years older than you! HE IS TOO OLD FOR YOU! A friend who was 45 years old when she married a 60 year old man is now having a big problem! Please reconsider! Age-wise and status-wise you ought not to PURSUE him!
---bebet3754 on 8/8/05


It is not wrong to consider someone that is older than you as long as you both are compatable, and realize that there will be issues with age differences. However, HE IS STILL MARRIED. When he divorces then maybe, but until then, leave him alone, find out why it has taken him so long to divorce her too, and step back and take a good look at the relationship, are you sure this is what you want. And why did he leave his wife? Make sure you know for sure.
---mary on 8/8/05


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