You have waited a long time to start her in church. Its possible she might gain some interest but it is going to take some doing. Her personality is pretty much set but God is able to do anything but fail. You are going to have to be a shining example before her. This is going to be tough. She will be watching your every move and everything you do. You make one mistake and she may call you down on it. Dealing with teens is a hard and tedious job. Are you born again? Why have you waited so long to get her invloved with church? We should get our kids involved way before this age. If possible. The sooner the better. Teens are naturally rebellious,sometimes. Trying to get them to do something against their will,is going to be a tall order.
---Robyn on 8/3/10|
God has given great responsibilities to the father. There are many men we could consider great fathers who taught thier children to worship God - Abraham, Zebedee, and Joseph, the "father" of Jesus, to name a few. But let's focus on Elkanah (1 Samuel 1:1-28).
He set an example of worship and service to his wife and children. He loved his wife and cooperated in rearing their child.
When you train up your child that going to church is fun, they will be expecting that into adulthood. After reaching adulthood they will be disappointed that it is no longer fun and leave the church.
Do a bible search for "one another" and "each other." This is what getting your children involved in.
---Steveng on 10/14/08|
Just wait until she is bored and friendless one day. Then suggest it to her. On the other hand, she might be better off not going if all they do is go to find a date or to do sports. I found the youth group in our local school was useless, it had no aim, did nothing, taught us nothing. We just used to go to use sports facilities in the school.
---frances008 on 10/14/08|
John ... I am surprised you can't see what I say tongue in cheek, which is that children tend to want to do what their parents don't want them to do!
Have you been a parent?
---alan_of_UK on 10/14/08|
Alan, reverse psychology is not the way to go on this one. All three suggestions that you gave are not the truth. If your kid's are under age, then their coming to church. When they come of age and they no longer want to go, then that's their choice but most likely they will return someday when they have their own special relationship with the Lord.
---John on 10/14/08|
Tell her she can't go, or that she is not old enough, or you do not approve.
---alan8869_of_UK on 5/26/07|
The purpose of church is NOT to "entertain." It's a shame, however, that this is what people are looking for.
30 years ago, I was organist in a largish Baptist church. They had "Children's Church" during the main service, mostly with puppet shows. They might call one big fuzzy one Verse Varmint, but the children really knew he was Cookie Monster.
I wondered at the time what this was going to do to Evangelical worship.
Now we know--"liturtainment."
---Jack on 5/8/06|
As a youth leader it does get frustrating and hard to keep the kids entertained and interested to keep them coming back. Talk to your daughter and find out why she doesn't want to go. There might be some personal reasons. If you don't want to take her to church (force her), have them come to her. Have a BBQ with the kids of that youth group. Have her invite some of her school friends. She will be more comfortable for her because she is in her own home.
---carea6568 on 4/12/06|
Invite some of the girls her age over to your house for a get together, like a ladies tea. Invite their moms too. Make it a "Get to know you tea." Or, popcorn and videos afternoon, and watch sappy chic fliks and laugh and cry together.
---Madison on 4/5/06|
Thanks everyone. UK alan, you did give me a good chuckle. My daughter began to get involved(and it is an excellent youth program), somehow lost interest...I think she feels she does not fit in, we were not always involved in church...we know the youth leaders, they have put forth much effort to include her, she blows them off and frustrates me because they are doing alot of really fun activities. I insist on some church attendance with me, but don't believe in forcing her.
---sherry_g on 4/5/06|
You say your church has a youth group. one of the most effective methods is have someone her own age who is a member of that youth group talk to her and invite her to attend some of the group meetings and activities. Work through your youth director.
This is totally predicated on the assumption that there is an highly effective youth program in place in you church.
The cardinal rule is never push youth into a non-effective program as it does more damage then good.
---notlaw99 on 4/3/06|
Alan: I knew you were kidding. I tried reverse psychology on one of my sons and it backfired. He was too smart to be fooled by that one.
---Madison on 4/3/06|
John ... are you from the US?
I think had you been in the UK, you would have recognised the possibility of humour.
---alan8869_of_UK on 4/3/06|
Pray for her and with her regarding her spiritual and social needs. Introduce her to girls her age from church, like socializing with another mom and her daughter on a shopping outing together all four of you. You and mom have a soda at the food court while the girls go to the shops alone to get to know each other. Have a picnic with some of the youth at church at your house. Have the youth minister and his wife over to your house for dinner with your family.
---Madison on 4/3/06|