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I Don't Like My In-Laws

I don't like my N-laws. They're always comparing my husband and I to my husband's sister. Everytime we do something my mother-in-law always says that my husband's sister has done that but a better turn out. I'm to the point I don't want to be around my husband's family. Any advice?

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 ---carea on 4/18/06
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Robin, this topic was beneficial topic in April of 2006 but not in August of 2010.

But you are being an incredibly bad steward of time and intellect that God gave you. This topic is no longer pertinent and slap Christ in the face for your misuse of the resources God trusted you with.

There are many topics on ChristiaNet that transcend time but personal sob stories don't they have a very short duration and when the interest in then is over let them die a natural death and move on the the current needs of other people who need help, there is certainly no shortage of them in this economy.

The president blogger know when to quit beating the dead horse.
---Friendly_Blogger on 8/18/10

Friendly Blogger ... You unjustly accuse Mima of resurrecting this blog.

Mima responded in April 06 to mine of 4/23/06.

Then the Moderators resurrected the blog, and Mima's post was redated as 9/7/07.

This is what happens when the blogs are resurrected ... the last post on the blog is redated, and it seems as if it is a recent blog

It happens all the time
---alan8566_of_uk on 8/18/10

Friendly Blogger: You are not living up to your blogging name: Please be kind. Sometimes people do need someone to just listen. It does not matter how old a post is. If you don't want to comment, then don't! I see many(questions) that just surprises me but these questions are important and real to someone. There are real christians here at this site. We do understand and want to be a blessings to someone.We will listen and tryto help. This person needs a loving and compassionate christian who understand. Everyone does not feel they way you do. Please leave her alone.
---Robyn on 8/18/10

This blog topic was started in April 2006 it was was about someone's personal problem and and it's applicability was about of about a month. Then mima tried to resurrect it more then a year later someone else in 2008 and some one else in 2010.

This is a dead topic that one one can benefit from discussing again. The only thing that four year old dirty laundry does is stink rather putridity.

If it is a personal sob story and it is more then 4 mounts old leave it alone. It was never good enough to get 75 comments to retire it in 2006. Don't resurrect them with new comments. It was a poor topic in April 2006, why wade in the septic tank to bring up this garbage again when there are actually current topics to discuss.
---Friendly_Blogger on 8/17/10

my father-in -law has a drinking problem n he blabbers non-sense everynite under influence. i hate it.i come from a cultured and tee-totaller family n i can`t take it. but my husband insists that we all stay together. i feel like dying
---dreamy on 8/17/10

Two days ago I went to my family reunion. Rode with my sister and brother in law and their 22 yr old son.. Brother in law became irritated over something that happened. I don't even know what! He left me and my husband 80 miles from home without a ride. How's that for not liking your N-laws?I was outdone and stunned that he would stoop to this but he did.
I am asking the Lord to help me to not be resentful or angry towards my sister(for not taking up for me) and him. Also the nephew disrespected me as his aunt and my husband(uncle).We did find a way home. I was angry but am feeling better today.
---Robyn on 8/16/10

Very sad but these type things do happen. Stand up to these demons and be true to yourself. Get into agreement with your husband as to how to handle this thing. If he says to fire--then blast them! I would leave the results up to them. Like it or don't come around, anymore! Their choice. Enough is enough! You have to go to war, to have peace,sometimes.
If they don't come around, you want be missing anything. Believe me you will sleep better and be in better health than you have been, in years. Hallelujah! Get out of here--devil! Now! I say...go!
---Robyn on 8/6/10

My in-laws came for 4 weeks - that's right four weeks! (not the first time they have over stayed!). The horror unfolded when he offerred to do the upstairs bathroom and we asked if we could pick out the features, colors etc. it was a fight all around. He took it out on my 11 yr old daughter (his own grandchild), and swore at her calling her inappropriate names. needless to say she was devestated and still is, as he has not acknowledged his wrong doing at all.

They cut their trip short - they were gong to stay another week - they just got up one morning - honked the horn and left.

I have asked told them they are simply not welcomed back into our family until they can be respectful and apologize. Pretty sure that won't happen.
---Theresa on 8/5/10

The next time you tell a story in her presence, end it with "but I'm sure ...(husand's sister) a better result that we did, why don't you tell us about it?" A couple of those and she'll get the picture.
---Kathy on 12/23/08

I am the same way, in every single way. My husband and I will do something then when we see his mother and tell her she ALWAYS has to say ohh well that's nice they did that but it was funny or something like that. It's getting to a point where I am getting fed up with it but I'm not saying anything because their my in-aws and I respect them.
---Dana on 12/15/07

Here's an idea. The next time this happens look the person right in the eye, and calmly say to them you have no idea how much you hurt me when you compare me to others. Stop right there do not Say anymore. I once did this on another subject and the person I was talking to broke into tears and ran and hugged my neck!
---mima on 9/10/07

Carea ... I am sorry, I had misread your original blog.
---alan8869_of_UK on 4/23/06

20 years ago my In-laws tried to convert me to their beliefs for some time. They gave it a good try. Then they told my wife she was 'unevenly joked' to me, as I was of da' devil' and had to leave me, or else. The else was to be disowned. Today we have a fine family, we are a team, they are the losers. Every family should be an independant unit.
---MikeM on 4/23/06

Doesn't it say in the marriage vow's to for sake all other.You and your husband should sit down and talk to them because it will not get any better. God bless you
---Betty on 4/23/06

Hardest job I had no time off for 14 yrs. No one understands, Just Obey God. My hubby wked 50/60 hrs a wk for yrs. Working I would clear 300.00 a month if thrifty. I saved more a month by not eat out, kids were healthier, time to shop for deals. Forgive them they do not understand. My mother didn't. Don't give up the relationship.
---kay3748 on 4/22/06

Carea: If you choose not to work, and your husband's income is sufficient, then you owe nobody an apology for not working. If they insult you, use my formula. When people tell me I am too religious, I lovingly tell them that it is not about religion, but about having a personal relationship with Jesus.
---Madison on 4/22/06

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Carea, I agree with Madison. If you want people to read and understand what you have written, don't make it into a code or puzzle. Spell out the words please.
---Ulrika on 4/22/06

The bible says to turn the other cheek, yes. But we only have two cheeks. I wouldn't give them the opportunity to say anything bad about me. I would put them in their place. God didn't make us to be doormats for everyone to walk over, including your family. They are jealous because you have peace, and you can turn to God when trouble comes, they have their bottle, which sometimes is empty, and they have to get another. With God he is never empty, for we are overflowing with peace.
---Rebecca_D on 4/22/06

Alan- No I don't work because I don't work. I don't work not because I am religious. I am religious because I go to church, pray, and be active in my church. I used to work but because of certain reasons I do not anymore. Did that make you more confused?
---carea6568 on 4/22/06

Carea ... You say "My FIL makes fun of me because I do not work and because I am so religious."
Is it true that you do not work and because you are so religious?
That would seem to be a strange way of expressing your faith, The Bible does not say religious people should not work.
Maybe your parents in law feel yuo are lazy and not pulling your weight in your marriage.
---alan8869_of_UK on 4/22/06

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Carea: Please type the words out, I have trouble reading your post with just letters for words.

Limit your time with them, and tell your in-laws how you feel when they hurt you. Be short and loving. "Mom, I feel ____________ when you do ______________." Leave it at that.

Their gambling is not the issue. Your being able to feel comfortable without being attacked is the issue. Be honest about your feelings. Don't sit and take their insults without telling them it hurts.
---Madison on 4/21/06

There R times that my FIL tells us 2 shut up because he is watching a TV show. My MIL when I say something she always replys with a rude commit. She is always talking about how they have the money. But they are N2 gambling and drinking & I am very strongly against all that. My FIL makes fun of me because I do not work and because I am so religious. I know N the Bible (Beatitudes) it talks about people who make fun of U because of believeing N God, but after awhile I just want 2 go cry N a corner.
---carea6568 on 4/20/06

Love them Lots and even when they hurt you try loving them some more, It really works!
---Carla on 4/19/06

I don't have any problems with my husband's parents. My in-laws are like second parents to me. If they do something that to me or my husband that I don't like, I tell them how I feel, and leave it alone. I would have a family meeting with all that are involved, and tell them just how you feel. And if they get upset, then that is their problem, as least you got it off of your chest.
---Rebecca_D on 4/19/06

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Rebecca D.- My husband is so blind at all this. At times he sees it and says something and most of the times he doesn't see. He gets very angry with me when I don't go with him to see his family. I've tried to come up with every excuse not to see them. When I worked I would schedule myself for when they would get together so I wouldn't have to be around them. Surley I am not the only one who has this problem? Am I?
---carea on 4/18/06

Tell them who cares who can do what better. It isn't a compenation. Or just don't go around them unless you half to.
---Rebecca_D on 4/18/06

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