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Can I Trust My Husband Again

When God put us together 16 years ago, I knew it was forever; I was wrong because He cheated right before our 2nd year anniversary. I forgave him but I don't know if I can trust him again. I love him with all my heart.

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 ---Vanessa on 8/22/06
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Rebuilding trust is the most difficult part of this process. It can be done, but it takes alot of work and courage from both spouses. Check out the book The Dance of Restoration: Rebuilding Marriage After Infidelity. May God bless you as you walk toward one another.
---Melodie on 9/2/06

If it's true god brought you together, & assuming god wants you to stay together, then it sounds as if you not only lack faith in your husband but in god's plan. But are you certain god didn't intend for you to get a divorce, some time ago?
---david on 8/24/06

Jesus said that if you do not forgive, He will not forgive you. Time to forgive your husband. If you are still dwelling on this after 14 years, you have not forgiven him.
---Susie on 8/24/06

Vanessa, does he know Jesus? Encourage him to get to KNOW Jesus and Father God. Take him to church and pray for him diligently. God promises, "I'll take that heart of stone and turn it into a heart of flesh." It will take much prayer and some fasting, but it will be worth it in the end. (((huggs))))
---Donna9759 on 8/23/06

Yes, trust is a decision, but trusting somebody blindly can be foolish. Wisdom and experience play important roles in helping to determine whether trusting a particular person is a good or bad decision. Congratulations on being able to still love your husband so much. Maybe love does conquer all.
---ralph7477 on 8/23/06

I don't think you should trust him any more.
---Chris on 8/23/06

Trust is earned. If he cheated on you close to 16 years ago, and has not cheated on you since that time, think his trust has been earned. Now it's your turn. You have to decide to trust him. This next statement may be too strong and hurt your feelings, and it may not be accurate, but in my dealings with folks concening this issure, usually find the person who has to trust; can't because of their own guilt over something.
---wivv on 8/22/06

It seems that you've been loving and trusting him for the last 14 years--at least on the basis of what you said.
---Jack on 8/22/06

Trust is a decision.

You may get hurt again but then again you may not.

No one can tell you for sure if he will or won't cheat again, but if you love him as you do, and choose to restore him completely to your grace and he doesn't cheat, then you've lost nothing and gained everything.

If you don't trust and he's ready to be a man once and for all then you've lost.

Jesus says "fear not"
---Follow_me on 8/22/06

Has he been unfaithful during the last 14 years? If not, I guess he won't stray now>
---alan8869_of_UK on 8/22/06

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