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My Mother Yells At Me

My 2 children and I are living with my Mother who constantly yells at me because her way is always right. She's been in Florida for the past 6 weeks and will be home this Saturday. I break down in tears when I think of her getting home. I cant take this much longer. I am 47 years old. Financially I can't move. What should I do?

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 ---Kim4747 on 11/1/06
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another resurrected blog from 2006 Kim probably has moved out already....

Find yourself a husband or boyfriend who may be willing to help you,for a while. How old are your children? Are they able to find jobs?
Robyn 11/7/08

Robyn are you for real or just a bitter hateful spiteful women?

children are a gift from God not "baggage" or did you forget this "baggage" would be this womens grandchildren?
---Rhonda on 11/10/08

I noticed much self professing christian "love" again on this topic without anyone even knowing the circumstances

those christians who just love oh so much and yet they have nothing but bitter condemning words to sell on these posts....
---Rhonda on 11/10/08

Your mother should not be yelling at you. you are a grown Woman. That being said, Yes you can move, Go to Housing and DHS and Apply for all the help you can get. You don't have to stay there.
---a_good_friend on 11/7/08

Your mom should be yelling at you! Old as you are, at home and has brought your baggage along too( two kids). My God the lady probably feels worse than you do. Move Give her a rest and yourself,too.
Find yourself a husband or boyfriend who may be willing to help you,for a while. How old are your children? Are they able to find jobs?
---Robyn on 11/7/08

Its so common in this world for mother`s to yell at thier children, i will say at your age, your mom ought to have given you respect, well what i will say is to keep obeying her because she is your mom and she raise raise you up, find a convenient time to talk matters with her and try to make her see reasons of how you feel when she yell at you, dont yell at her when she yell at you, try to show love and respect to her as a mom
---John on 11/6/08

(II.)Kim4747, Let the Lord's light shine through you(Matthew 5:14-16), don't let anyone, even "kinfolk", rob you of your joy in the Lord, because it's your STRENGTH (Nehemiah 8:10), your gift from God! Don't neglect to REFRESH your mind and Spirit with the goodness of the Lord :(Philippians 4:8)(Ephesians 5:19) and don't reciprocate the fussing, and pouting(1 Peter 3:9), live out your testimony before her. I will pray for you. God Bless!
---Mrs._Morgan on 3/8/08

(III.) Kim, I will also pray that your finances will improve, so that you and your children can move(have your OWN place), If you want, I can agree with you in prayer for that. I would like to testify to you that , God has blessed me and my kids so much, we have moved into a nice apartment, I WAS ONCE IN YOUR SHOES TOO, I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH! God Bless!
---Mrs._Morgan on 5/27/07


Don't yell back. Let nobody rob your Serenity from you.

---Reiter on 11/7/06

Kim::Good luck & God bless you kim.
---Emcee on 11/4/06

You go into great detail to quote everyone perfectly. Then you add your critical twist. Helpful. "Think people".
---anonymous on 11/4/06

Ok I'm a deafetest but you will have trouble until someone desides to lose and I bet that one is going to be the one God Honors.
---Jared on 11/4/06

**The programs for housing and free stuff for single moms have been cut terribly in the last 6 years.**

And let's think.

WHO has been leading the government for the last 6 years?

What does the Bible says happens to places that will not help widows and orphans? (This should apply to single mothers--or single fathers.)
---Jack on 11/3/06

I agree with most of what each of you have said and I am so thankful that you replied. My being at my mom's was a last resort. We had our own apt. for the past 6 yrs and It has been really hard for me to be here and have to ask her help. I will take every bit of advice to heart. Thank you so much.
---Kim4747 on 11/3/06

Ok, this will probably get me stoned, BUT...

At 47 years of age, you should NOT be living with your mother UNLESS you have moved in to help her, especially with two children. This is backwards. She shouldn't be expected to help support you right now. Do whatever you need to do to MOVE OUT.
---Crystal on 11/3/06

Jared - I'm sure that is a defeatist attitude. I would never want to hide who I am to please someone else. If they can't take me as I am, they can lump it.
---laure5759 on 11/3/06

You and your mom need to talk. At the very least she should agree not to yell at you in front of the children. If you are afraid to talk to her then you need to grow up. If your mom is not a reasonable person then you need to find a way to move out. Her yelling at you and how you respond to it can teach your children to disrespect you.
---grace3869 on 11/2/06

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anonymous, I worked in an agency where single moms did not have programs for housing and free stuff as you describe. Where I live there is little low income housing available and Section 8 is practically nonexistant. Most of the Section 8 housing is in drug infested neighborhoods where a single woman is not safe to live alone.

The programs for housing and free stuff for single moms have been cut terribly in the last 6 years.
---Madison1101 on 11/2/06

I have a feeling Mom's not up for therapy. Her way or the highway. There are all kinds of government programs for single mothers with kids. You can go back to school, they pay for rent, schooling, the works. You need to find these programs and get your own place. You're Mother is probably tired, worn out, and would like to enjoy retirement.
---anonymous on 11/2/06

do things like she does until you can afford to leave. Blessed are the peacemakers. Only after you calm tentions down can you calmly discuss differences. (I would thank her for her generosity of letting you and your children live with her. Maybe she feels like you aren't thankful for what she is doing for you)
---Jared on 11/2/06

Norma::Thanks ,I was always under the impression nobody read my messages because I was the hated RC too sanctimonious HA ha HA I was wrong Deo Gratias.
---Emcee on 11/2/06

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I agree with Laure. When I visiting my mother she would try to under mind how I was raising my daughter. I finally had to tell her that this was my child and I will raise her the way I think is best. I would listen to what she had to say but if it didn't apply to the way I was raising my daughter I wouldn't use it. Go to a minister and talk with him and pray to God for guidance and faith to trust Him. I also agree with Emcee that you need to find something and anything would be better than whatyou have.
---Norma7374 on 11/2/06

Mothers need love and understanding as do their 47 year old children that live at home with their children. Is it possible that there are some things that you are doing or not doing that cause problems for your mother? Perhaps she could use a kind word, a smile, a hug, some peace of mind for herself, and for you to stop judging her. Be grateful she is allowing you and your children to live in her home.
---Annie on 11/2/06

Kim ::Pardon me for being intrusive.It seems you are dependant on Mom.Idont know your financial status or any other impediment.But you need to change your enviorment,bite the bullet & find your own place.mothers yelling will then stop You may not have luxuries but you will have peace of mind Then you storm heaven for this to happen.There are agencies for such a situation if you do not have a spouse.
---Emcee on 11/2/06

Kim, Most areas have some type of financial aid you could get if your income is below a certain level and subsidized housing. Are you receiving $$$support for kids? What ages are children? What do they say about the situation? I don't know what you believe about Jesus & His help at this time. You do need someone to talk to who can give you godly practical advice & spiritual support. Is there someone who could be with you when you talk to mom? I can tell you are afraid. God has a plan for you & children.
---Linda on 11/2/06

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Kim, I'd suggest that you take her aside when she gets home, and tell her that you are the mother of your children. That they need to respect you, and that you need to be allowed to be their mother. That you love and respect her as your mother, but that you wish to be allowed to do things your way.

I am friends with my Mom, and she lets me do things my way, even if she disagrees. I am so sorry that your Mom is like this.
---laure5759 on 11/2/06

You do not have to submit yourself to the manipulation and control of your mother. You are an adult now. The first thing I suggest to do is to pray and keep on praying that the Lord will turn the situation around for you. Then, if things get too bad, then say something to her! Pray that the Lord will make a way out of there for you. Bless you. :)
---Helen_5378 on 11/2/06

I suggest you learn to set boundaries with your mom. If you need to, a therapist can teach you how to do that. It will take practice and be scary, but it is worth it.
---Madison1101 on 11/1/06

I hate to offer no better comfort than this, but as long as you live in her house, you're going to have to put up with her yelling at you.

47 years old and can't provide a home for yourself and your children? Of COURSE she's going to think she's always right. Does she have any evidence to the contrary?
---Jack on 11/1/06

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(I.)Kim4747, Dear one, Let the Lord serve you His joy, and His peace, learn to truly turn over your burdens to Him( Matt. 11:28-30) (John 14:27)(Philippians 4:6,7) . Never forget that no matter how difficult the situation is, God's Grace is always sufficient(2 Corinthians 12:9)God's Grace, will pull you through it! Many have kin who can be almost unbearable to be around. What do you do?
---Mrs._Morgan on 11/1/06

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