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How Can I Find A Date

If I am choosing to wait for God to send me a mate, do I still "look" for one? Like visiting online dating sites? I don't date anyway (and haven't for many years). How can I find a mate, if I don't date someone? I am confused.

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 ---ljt on 1/18/07
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Of course you should make efforts to look for a date.
I joined a singles and single again church group and thru that met my husband.
My brother met his wife online thru some service or other. My daughter met her husband thru where she worked.
Before marriage I joined some non christian social groups and met people. In large cities there are lots of clubs for most anything, sailboating was my idea of fun. Ask the Chamber of Commerce where you live what's available perhaps.
---virga6646 on 2/18/11


The bigger question I have, will we ever hear from you again after you find your true love?
God is not the author of confusion.

Maybe this is a time stop the frantic looking and wait on the Lord. Rest in the Lord. Find your peace in Christ Jesus.
Put your trust in Him.
---Cindy on 9/13/08


Lit; We had so many things in common it was uncanny. We had the same faith, beliefs in God. I prayed for God to send me someone whom I can share my whole life with. Someone whom I can talk to about anything under the sun. I went through a divorce and I didn't want another one. I asked God if he and I was going to be together forever, then let him ask me to marry him. He did, within a few hours. We've been together for 9 years. I just knew in my heart that God saved him for me.
---Rebecca_D on 7/10/07


Rebecca D.---could you explain more about how you "knew" that he was the one? I know that God puts us in the exact location we need to be at the exact time we need to be there for everything to go according to his plan. I read something in my Quest Study Bible that says God's time is eternity, our time on earth is limited and thats why we are more impatient.
---ljt on 7/9/07


Thank you Bill bila---I do know all that, but it helps sometimes to see it written down.
---ljt on 7/9/07




You're not Ruth. You are the only you God has. I'd say He has a very special plan for you to discover and enjoy with Him. It won't be like any other > there won't be any methods to use, that you can give the glory to, later. But you will thank God, and no less. You have all He has already provided for you, for relationships...what He has you ready for, now. See what He has you do; He will satisfy you.
---Bill_bila5659 on 7/9/07


I met my husband on this site....been married a little over 2 years. We lived over 250 miles apart and would not have met without this site. I don't understand how anyone could say meeting in this manner was wrong or sinful....different, but not wrong.
---Annie on 7/9/07


When I first met my husband. He was still married but seperated. He worked the night shift, as did I. We would talk, mostly about him and his wife. I liked him, but I stayed away. He never did come on to me. Right before his divorce was final we got together. I knew in my heart that he was the one for me. We had the same faith, but yet sinners. We got saved together and God called me to sing and a few years later, God called him to preach. Now we are one in Christ.
---Rebecca_D on 7/8/07


Thank you Marcia---I had forgotten all about Ruth and Boaz. Does anyone on here know of any writings (other than in the Bible) about Ruth?
---ljt on 7/8/07


When God sends you your soulmate they will fall right into your circle of relationships. Like in the book of Ruth. Boaz did not go looking for Ruth, she just ended up in his feild. Ruth wasn't looking for Boaz he just ended up being the owner of the feild she was gleaning in. Trust God he will not disapoint you. When the time is right he will place your soulmate within your circle of relationships and God will draw you two together the same way he drawed you to himself.
---Marcia on 7/8/07




If I was single again, and looking for a husband (thank God I'm through with that) I think I would try the online thing. Just be pen pals for a long time and then meet for coffee in a public place? ps: why do people say God helps those who help themselves? I thought it was the other way around; God helps those who CANT help themselves.
---sue on 7/8/07


M - ("God helps those who help themselves!") -- That is not to be found anywhere in Scripture. Scripture teaches us to "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding" (Proverbs 3:5).
---Helen_5378 on 7/8/07


God helps those who help themselves! Your spouse is never going to find you sitting at home alone. You have to get out and socialize. Being set up by a friend is the top reason people met their spouse. If you're not working on your friendships and meeting new people, it's unlikely to happen for you anytime soon. If you are too afraid to date, nothing will every happen for you.
---M on 7/7/07


MikeM is a trekkie, too!

Captain Kathryn Janeway is played by Kate Mulgrew, on Star Trek Voyager. She must guide her ship home through the unexplored Delta Quadrant. (background music up)
---John_T on 2/13/07


MikeM I was raised around the wimpy-wife types in the pentacostal church- emotional jellyfish, puppets to their bully husbands

What a biographical statement! I can now see how you wrongly attribute fundamentalism with that sort of abuse; you and siblings were victims.

Jesus was very manly, and very compassionate; the anthesis of your upbringing.

It is not wrong to be fundamental, but it is wrong to be abusive. Jesus NEVER abused anyone at any time.
---John_T on 2/13/07


"My Mother looked like, acted like Captain Janeway."- MikeM

At first I thought that was going to say Captain Crunch! Sorry...I'm hungry. I'm leaving now. Good bye. My kitchen is calling me. :)
---Kay6588 on 1/25/07


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I find a weak crybaby women unwomanly, the 'always hurting in their heart' types I always find 'strong' women to be attractive, in many ways. I was raised around the wimpy-wife types in the pentacostal church- emotional jellyfish, puppets to their bully husbands, yuck. A strong womenly educated woman with a backbone, like my mother makes a house a home. My Mother looked like, acted like Captain Janeway.
---MikeM on 1/25/07


Like Bobby and Sissy? :)
---Todd on 1/23/07


Hey Todd, I don't play Lawrence Welk stuff. I like waltzy stuff, music that makes you want to dance.
---Caring on 1/23/07


Amen to that. The organ would go out the door with the Lawrence Welk reruns.

And a one-a, and a two-a, Bobby and Sissy flinging each other around the dance floor.
---Todd on 1/22/07


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kay, yes, Martini humor.
---MikeM on 1/22/07


Mike: that was FUNNY!
---sue on 1/22/07


Kay, my wife loves the organ and she loves hearing me play. Although I can't read music, I also compose songs which she likes a lot. In fact when we got married, I composed a song with the music and lyrics dedicated to her and asked a famous singer to sing it to her in church. I put her in tears.

She says (and I'd NEVER argue with her) that she married the best man on earth and I say the same about her. I love her so much that many times I bite her.
---Caring on 1/22/07


Caring, you're such a wonderful husband or so it sounds. ;)
But I think the organ music would get on my last nerve! I would probably toss that thing out the front door.
---Kay on 1/22/07


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Aren't there single men in your church? There have been a lot of people who have met and married men that they have met online. The only problem is you really have to be cautious about it. See if you can find any Christian Single Groups in your area and online. You don't state how old you are, which might make a difference. As for myself I've been a widow for 17 years and can't imagine myself getting married again.
---Norma7374 on 1/22/07


Kay I wonder why God created man and woman different.

Speaking of dishes and all, after we finish eating, I play the electonic organ to serenade my wife while she does the dishes. Do I get an applause for that?

No, I don't. I help her a lot with cooking, dishes, laundry and many other things.
---Caring on 1/22/07


I met my wife in a college class. I asked her for a date and she said, "You got to be kidding!" -MikeM

I couldn't help but laugh really loud at that one!

".. and my wife does whatever I tell her, submitting to me in all areas of life without question! (Yes dear, I will get off the computer and do the dishes)"

Is this a joke?




---Kay on 1/22/07


Caring, I don't see anything in Genesis that states how everyone is to get married. I find just the opposite of your opinion in Paul's letters.
---Kay6588 on 1/22/07


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This is an interesting blog especially for single old timers,who are still able to stand back & smell the roses.I picked My rose from the church Compound so it was blest by God for 54 years like riding a roller coaster anew ride every day.Recipe:-stay in His grace fulfill His contract avoid the bumps stop at the stop signs & make sure that he/she is of the same opinion with Gods Help the smile on your face will be from ear to ear.
---Emcee on 1/22/07


Caring, where did you get that idea?
---Kay on 1/22/07

Check Genesis
---Caring on 1/22/07


I met my wife in a college class. I asked her for a date and she said, "You got to be kidding!" Well, it could not get worse than that. I am 36, married to her for 15 years, and my wife does whatever I tell her, submitting to me in all areas of life without question! (Yes dear, I will get off the computer and do the dishes)
---MikeM on 1/22/07


Todd, I am very happily married. Some people though knock down married life like you see below.
---Caring on 1/22/07


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"Men and women were created to get married and not to stay single."

Caring, where did you get that idea?
---Kay on 1/22/07


"Get a husband, and pretty soon you will want to be single again."

Depends on what kind of husband you get.
---Kay6588 on 1/22/07


Todd, I am very happily married. Some people though knock down married life like you see below.
---Caring on 1/22/07


"Men and women were created to get married and not to stay single."

Caring, where did you get that idea?
---Kay on 1/22/07


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"Get a husband, and pretty soon you will want to be single again."

Depends on what kind of husband you get.
---Kay6588 on 1/22/07


Caring,
I'm not married, and even though I would like to be married, I'm not lost becasue I do not have a mate. I don't know of any single women who feel that way.
---lynet on 1/21/07


No sour grapes here. I'm married.

That's not scriptural that everyone is to be married.

Caring, are you desperate to be married?
---Todd on 1/21/07


OOOPPPSSSS, it's the FOX and not the WOLF.

First tyme I maid a misteak in my life!!!!
---Caring on 1/21/07


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"A man without a woman is a fish without a tail..." More like a fish without a hook in his mouth.
---ralph7477 on 1/21/07


Alan, it could be that you were one in a thousand of good marriages. We see alot of miserable marriages here, every single day. The desperate, who are ready to jump into a unequally yoked marriage.
---Raine on 1/21/07


Catherine ::A womans role was Get married to populate the world,as God told Eve Increase & multiply.But there were some chosen to be Virgins,& who were sheltered.Because that part of their being was most important.Today they call them single,who still want to fulfill that desire & remain as such.Cant have it both ways. These are the ones most expounding.
---Emcee on 1/21/07


Is this a case of the wolf calling the grapes sour because he could not reach it?

Men and women were created to get married and not to stay single. A man without a woman is a fish without a tail and a woman without a man is lost :))
---Caring on 1/21/07


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Oh well, CATHERINE, I must have been a failure as a husband during my 33 year marriage (my wife died at age 56)
I can't have done my job of being a husband very well, because she never wanted to be single again.
---alanUKquent64534 on 1/20/07


Catherine, you forgot to put a smiley at the end of your post.
---Caring on 1/20/07


CATHERINE, I couldn't agree with you more sister! We must really count our blessings. God Bless!
---Mrs._Morgan on 1/20/07


Depends on what you mean by "wait" and "look". Jesus waited constantly on His Father and yet was very busy looking to know His will and to do it. It is so much fun as a Christian to let God "sweat the details" while we watch to see what He wants us to do, then walk through the open doors where He commands. Joseph waited years before God worked and took him from slavery to prison to the palace. Each step of the way he was faithful at his post--very busy while he waited.
---Wayne87 on 1/20/07


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PERSONALLY, I think it's pretty good being single. Obeying God is a full time job.Get a husband, and pretty soon you will want to be single again. Better get happy where you are at. GOOD DAY.
---CATHERINE on 1/19/07


Are you a desperate and frantic woman/man? Seek God. God works in mysterious ways.

He can move on a man's heart in ways that no woman can.

God brought my husband right to my doorstep. They say it doesn't happen, that's not true.

I prayed for a mate, then allowed the Lord to take care of it. He did. It didn't happen overnight, but God answered my prayers.
---Raine on 1/19/07


I needed help, circumstances brought my husband right to my doorstep.

I didn't sit at home and watch TV. I was a productive single woman. I had church, activities, community functions, and good friends.

Say your prayers, rest in the Lord. God can bring you an awesome mate.

Frantically searching can bring you a mess.
---Raine on 1/19/07


Maybe this is a time stop the frantic looking and wait on the Lord. Rest in the Lord. Find your peace in Christ Jesus.
Put your trust in Him.
---Cindy on 1/18/07

Cindy, I hope ljt will not follow your advice. I call that abuse of God. Pray and do your part also. If you just pray and sit at home watching tv you'll end up watching tv all your life.
---Caring on 1/19/07


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My husband and I met right here on this site and married April, 2005.
---Annie on 1/19/07


Lure them home with food. Bat your eyes alot.

Leave a trail of crumbs, so the 'wolf' can follow you home.

Make their favorite dish.

When the wrestling match starts on the couch, act all surprised, that your womanly wiles worked.

Throw them out immediately. Reclaim your virture.

Do this repeatedly, and wonder why the results are always the same.
---Todd on 1/19/07


Try a new plan. Allow the Christian man to invite the Christian woman out to a public place for church, community event, meal. Allow the Christian man to pay. Woman who pay for everything will really pay, if they marry the guy. Bible says a man is to take care of his family.
---Todd on 1/19/07


This is a good place to look for a partner but you should also look in other places like your church, amongst friends, etc.

Pray, but do your job also. Correspond in TOTAL HONESTY, talk with the partner you find about your good and bad habits and inject tons of dignity.

I did that and she did that too. Yes, I found my loving wife here on CN and I suspect I found the best woman in the world. To me she is. Already married for almost two years.
---Caring on 1/18/07


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According to scripture the Spirit of God has always brought men and women together, hence, what God hath joined together let not man put asunder. Abraham tried to do the will of God his way and although in a different sense, we still see the outcome. Wait on the Lord and trust him as relationships have been a great tool of satan for the damning of souls.
Frank
---Frank on 1/18/07


Location, location, location.

Being in the right place at the right time.

Advertise, advertise, advertise.

If you don't promote yourself, no one else will.

Tell the world about your best attributes, and do it repeatedly. "I'm gorgeous".

That would be the world's way.

Try God's Way. Seek first the Kingdom of God and His Righteousness, and all these things (boyfriends, husbands) shall be added to you.
---Todd on 1/18/07


I personally believe that if we pray for something, that we must do our part. What is wrong with the friendship site right here? If you want a friend, you have to find a person to be friends with. Take action dear!
---Annie on 1/18/07


If you are a male, I am a female looking for a mate. You can view my profile at lesla6369. God bless.
---Leslie on 1/18/07


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