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My Boyfriend Is An Atheist

My boyfriend is an atheist and was not raised in a Christian home. He has spoke with my preacher and goes to church with me some. I want to help him see the light! I can't just walk away from him. I want to go about it with the right approach and I want to have hope that he can change!

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 ---Stephanie on 1/18/07
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I do understand your concern for your now boyfriend. But don't lose your soul trying to change or help someone else.You ned to make sure you are right with God. You are not a martyr and cannot chang someone else, if they don't want to be changed. If he is an atheist, he probably has other problems dealing with women and other issues. Are you prepared to deal with that as well? How does he treat his family? Especially his mom. Sometimes women try to take on the world and wind up losing their lives and getting the very short end of the stick. Sometimes losing their lives,kids and everything in the process. No one is worth this.
---Robyn on 6/20/11

If someone does not believe that the bible is truth, why would they believe in the Jesus taught in the bible.

You have to start by showing that the bible is true, rather than beating him over the head with the bible, Jesus, hell, and christianity.

Only when he accepts that the bible is true, can he accept the God and Jesus of the bible.

The way to show that the bible is true is by prophecy. I recomend: "Is there anything left you can trust." for a start in basic bible prophecy
---Francis on 6/4/11

"but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy,always being prepared to make a defense(reasoned statement or argument) to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you, yet do it with gentleness and respect, having a good conscience, so that when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame."

This is the way a disciple of Christ is to behave with those who do not believe not judgement, that is for God to decide.

Atheist, as I said in another blog, you cannot blame the father for the children that rebel and are disobedient. If you want to know who the God of scripture is look as the life of Jesus, he showed us by his life. Just something to consider
---willa5568 on 6/4/11

a fools denial of the truth and dissing of the truth does in no way make the manifested truth not true, nor the proven tangible documented truth not tangible nor not real. People stuck on stupid will have a rude awakeing when they are thrown into what they thought was an imaginary hell by what they thought was their imaginary God. God is not mocked, you reject him, and he will certainly reject you. Jesus did not make the firey hell nor the blissful heaven in vain.
---Eloy on 6/4/11

atheist, but your God is not imaginary, for he has physically manifested himself a little over 2,000 years ago in Judea, named Jesus Christ Almighty, he was recorded to have been seen, heard, and felt by both atheists and theists alike. Even today he mainfests himself to individuals as he whensoever he chooses. The foollsh whom say there is no God is equated to one saying there is no atheist whom posts here on this ChristiaNet website, totally and completely foolish. Let me suggest that you open your eyes and ears to the truth and stop hiding yourself in foolishness.
---Eloy on 6/4/11

"Only God knows the future with certain and his Bible records many instances of this certainty being certain." ---mima

Could I have a few examples of certainty being certain?
---atheist on 6/4/11

I have to agree with atheist. To just yell at people is being arrogant.

Along with prophecy ask your boyfriend why he does not believe. See what his reasons are. To just rush in without listening to the person can cause you to be trying to argue about something that does not matter to him.

It is also more loving to actually listen to the person and try to understand them. Actions done in love to others cannot be argued against. Reasons can be.

So above all else act in a loving manner.
---Samuel on 6/4/11

---Stephanie Francis is correct. Prophecies in the Bible prove that the Bible was written by no less than God himself through mankind. Only God knows the future with certain and his Bible records many instances of this certainty being certain. So Stephanie show this fact to your friend.
---mima on 6/4/11


Standing on a street corner with a megaphone telling others that they will burn in an imaginary Hell to be punished for "sins" by an imaginary "god" is the height of arrogance. To tell others that they are arrogant because they don't believe as you do is the definition of arrogance.
---atheist on 6/4/11

atheist, as I have preached in the streets and on college campuses, we are not unexperienced with the arrogant and foolish dissers of the truth, and we the prophets of God know full well how to hammer home God's Almighty Word to the misguided sinner. And since leej is equal to you, the enemy of God and all righteousness, thus leej probably already spreads the lie to other people. Nevertheless, every liar will be exposed and the truth will always conquer lies.
---Eloy on 6/4/11

There is a proven biblical method to approach one who does not believing in God

First start by showing him that the BIble is true. If he does not accept the bible as the word of God, then you task is difficult.

Proving that the bible is true is vey easy, it is based on fulfilled prophecies

You can get help from a study called " is there anything left you can trust" free online
---francis on 6/4/11


Could you pass that along to the street corner preachers?
---atheist on 6/3/11

//Your efforts to convert your boy friend will be in vain as salvation is solely of God//

Yeah because God wont move on an unbeliever unless we pray for him first?

My best friend was an atheist and many "Christians" told me to stay away from her as she was "elected to damnation" by God and that is why she was atheist. Good Christian people huh?
She is now a Christian today because I didnt give up. Love hopes in all things just as Gods word says. True love never gives up and uses the excuse that the person is "elected" to unbelief.

Instead of blaming God that someone we love doesnt believe, maybe we should look at ourselves.
---Jasheradan on 6/4/11

There is a proven biblical method to approach one who does not believing in God

First start by showing him that the BIble is true. If he does not accept the bible as the word of God, then you task is difficult.

Proving that the bible is true is vey easy, it is based on fulfilled prophecies

You can get help from a study called " is there anything left you can trust" free online
---francis on 6/4/11

stephanie, do not listen to the sinners whom lie saying that your efforts to lead your boyfriend to Christ are in vain, for NonChristians say this because they themselves refuse Christ and are condemned. But you go girl, share the Jesus that you know that you have with your boyfriend, and tell him that Jesus is the best thing that will ever happen to him if he accepts him. If he says that he wants Jesus too, and to become a Christian, then lead him in a sinners prayer of confession up to Jesus and surrender and asking for Jesus to come into his heart and into his life and to save him and make him into a real born-again Christian.
---Eloy on 6/4/11

Your efforts to convert your boy friend will be in vain as salvation is solely of God. All you can do is to pray for his salvation. My sister-in-law married a man who really was not a Christian and he really rebelled against her religion telling his mother-in-law that he would rather see his son a drunkard rather than a SDA.
---leej on 6/3/11

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Taylor the gospel into very simple terms by presenting the person Jesus to your boyfriend as how he came to earth to pay the personal price for your boyfriend by being scrificed on the cross so that your boyfrind can be together with you and Jesus in heaven. But the choice to choose to accept and follow after Jesus will be your boyfriends choice to either accept or reject Christ. Explain to him that the Christian life is the very best life, for a godly life is much better than a worldly life without God. And we have the promise of life everlasting with our Lord in heaven whereas the sinner's life is promised woe and eternal separation from God.
---Eloy on 6/3/11

candace and Angel, neither of you is the Holy Spirit.

However, there is a saying, "We are the only Bible some people will read. We are the only face of Christ some will see."

And if you don't believe me, look at John's post below.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 6/3/11

anon-- We don't know your boyfriend here, so no one here has set out to hurt him.

Unfortunately, the few atheists that post on this site are quite confrontational. They seek an argument so that is what they get.

I know some very respectful atheists and I respect them in return. As for myself personally, I don't discuss religion with them unless they seen to want such discussion.
---Donna66 on 6/3/11

He respects your beliefs as a Christian so you too should respect his beliefs as an athiest! I don't see him trying to change you, he accepts who you are and you should do the same. Respecting each others beliefs and not trying to convert each other will deepen your respect for one another.
---Anon on 6/2/11

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Athiests make the Best Christians!!!

They have not been polluted with the Psuedo Facade Bourgieose Manmade Tradition (Aren't we soooo nice PC people)based Country Clubs generally called Church.

Their gut is not filled with the Toxic ingredients found in Potlucks!

STOP !!!
(Ooops that went over the Fundi/Evangelical heads!)

For those of you Carnals (1minute and you're Saved by grace"/Rapture" then stuff your faces)

The Last paragraph was meant FIGURATIVELY as well as Literally!
---John on 5/8/11

I know exactly what u mean. My boyfriend is atheist and I'm christian. That's how he grew up. ---Angel on 5/1/11

It is foolishness to him.

The witnesses and the proof are in scripture for any doubter....but, it must be asked for, searched for.
Realizing... you are not married...yet.
1 Corinthians 7:14
For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean, but now are they holy.
1 Corinthians 7:16
For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?

If GOD draws him he will come.
---Trav on 5/3/11

I know exactly what u mean. My boyfriend is atheist and I'm christian. That's how he grew up. I can't explain in words so I feel about him...that's why I wanna help him change. But Im no t sure exactly how to say it...
---Angel on 5/1/11

Haden_Odom-- //you should both just sit down and talk about religion. Ask him why he doesn't believe in god, and explain why you do.//

I guess you are assuming they have not already done this.

//You'll come to respect each other's beliefs even more.//

Maybe.But don't count on it.
---Donna66 on 2/5/11

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It's hilarious how many people are like "Leave him! Leave him!"

I even saw one guy who said dating at all was a sin, and that you shouldn't date before you're married.

Honestly, I wanna tell you this: you should both just sit down and talk about religion. Ask him why he doesn't believe in god, and explain why you do. You'll come to respect each other's beliefs even more. Good luck, you guys.
---Haden_Odom on 2/5/11

I believe that this is a fairly out of date for the person that was originally looking for guidance but for those that are looking for an answer I would say STOP the word says not to be unequally yoked i know many that have gone ahead and married the guy like this guy and they did go to church just to get the girl. They are still married but lonely and belittled by their spouse that certainly have no intention going to church. He also tells us to guard our hearts - sometimes easier said than done especially when they speak our love laungage. Like Joseph - RUN - save yourself alot of heart ache - leave your coat if you have to
---Juanita on 4/1/10

A little understanding on your part that your boyfriend is the way God would desire us all to be may help create an understanding that all your boyfriend need do to be saved is acknowledge the savior's identity.

.....the spirit will take it from there (because God's spirit will be able to relate to your boyfriend's spirit)....

and then REREAD Donna's post again and again

seeing moreexcellent way has omitted that your boyfriend would also be required to REPENT of his former life be baptized to spiritual things

otherwise your boyfriend is simply performing a mouth exercise unsupported in Holy Scripture ...again REREAD Donna's post
---Rhonda on 3/29/10

You'll notice that he is....

Ephesians 5:9
"good and right and true".

A little understanding on your part that your boyfriend is the way God would desire us all to be may help create an understanding that all your boyfriend need do to be saved is acknowledge the savior's identity.

.....the spirit will take it from there (because God's spirit will be able to relate to your boyfriend's spirit)....

Romans 8:16
"it is the Spirit himself bearing witness with our spirit that we are children of God".

Even though your boyfriend does not have the law that is in the book, he is not lawless....

Romans 2:14
"they are a law to themselves, even though they do not have the law".
---more_excellent_way on 3/6/10

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oh why why why why MUST women INSIST on CHANGING men they dress talk even THINK

right approach is not the show stopping attending church syndrome religious christianity has brainwashed its followers into DRAGGING a non-believer there hoping they will "see the light" ...making religion nothing more than circus freak show -getting non-believers attending HOPING toprogram them to believe -so absurd and unsupported from Holy Word of God

please LEAVE him alone ...RESPECT his belief either marry him being unequally yoked understanding his beliefs are different or find someone of same belief system

your hope is sadly misguided IMAGINE if he spent his time insisting you follow his beliefs
---Rhonda on 3/3/10

Many a young man has gone through the motions of "becoming a Christian" to get the girl! She believes his conversion is genuine, because that's what she wants to believe... But after they marry, his interest in Spiritual things fades rapidly.
And he's the same old person he was before.

This presents a difficult situation for the Christian who is supposed to put Christ first. A non-Christian husband not only doesn't understand this, but most likely will resent it. Then WHO will you try to please?

I just say, BE VERY CAREFUL and trust the guidance of mature Christians.
---Donna66 on 3/2/10

Whoa whoa whoa people. I'm an Atheist. And I am NOT bad. I have better morals than most Christians thank you very much. Wow, a little judgemental are we? I'm pretty sure Jesus tells you not to be. But what do I know? I'm just an Atheist...But I did read some pretty nasty things. Like bad usually rubs off on good before good rubs off on bad. Why in the world is what I believe WORSE than what YOU believe? And I am not THE DARKNESS! You people scare me the way you are. There's almost nothing worse in the world, besides the KKK.
---Anthony on 3/1/10

i can relate. My boyfriend of about two years is very stubborn when it comes to the thought of religion. He is a very logical thinker which gets in the way of his faith. He is the sweetest person in the world and i love him to death but i would give anything for him to know the Lord. pray. don't give up on him. the Bible tells us to not leave those we love because they are not Christian but to stay with them in hopes they will open up to God by witnessing our faith. so, just give it to God, he'll take care of it.
---Morgan_Brenneman on 7/17/09

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I was not trying to be "hard", if you mean it in the sense of being cruel.
---John_T on 11/6/08

Bless you. You are a glutton for punushment. I wish you well. You have a long row to hoe.Make sure your hoe is strong,of good quality and your back bends very easily. I hope you are prepared for the journey. Are you a believer? May I ask?
---Robyn on 11/5/08

Especially my walk with God.
---candace on 11/4/08
Candace, your walk with God will be a walk of complete and total disobedience.

Light has no fellowship with darkness...we are not to be missionary daters...and you will be unequally yolked.
---kathr4453 on 11/5/08

---John_T's answer is cold, hard, insightful, and one that I'm in total agreement with!!!!!!
---mima on 11/5/08

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Two words:

Only God can change a human, and you are not Him.

You are like a toddler who plays with matches when you date this guy, for by definition, his aims are not to please God, as yours should be. The toddler had no intention of burning down the entire house while playing with those fascinating matches, but gee those small matches sometimes create big fires.

They are emotional fires and other fires that are not easily extinguished.

By continuing to date this guy, you are essentially saying that God does not have a good plan for your life, so you take matters into your own hands.

Continue, and you will peril your happy future.
---John_T on 11/5/08

I am Christian, very strong in my faith, but not so strong in defended it by quoting the Bible and such. My new boyfriend of about 2 months is an athiest. It seems to scare my friends and family more than me...I would love to learn more about what this means for us as a couple. Do you know of any good literature I can view to help me become more educated? By educated, I mean to get an understanding of how an athiest can effect our life as a couple, any children we may have, etc??? Especially my walk with God.
---candace on 11/4/08

First and foremost, I find it disturbing how everyone is encouraging her to leave this man. He is making an effort, and who hasn't backslid?

Remember, who should cast the first stone?
---Justin on 3/21/08

First and foremost, I find it disturbing how everyone is encouraging her to leave this man. He is making an effort, and who hasn't backslid?

Remember, who should cast the first stone?
---Justin on 3/21/08

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If people would quit justifying pre-marital dating and get back to allowing the Spirit of God to lead the right couple together we wouldn't have issues like this. The Spirit of God will not join light to darkness. The spirit of lust, the spirit of man and the devil will though.
---Frank on 1/22/08

The bad generally rubs off on the good quicker that the good rubs off on the bad. Give Him up.>>>>No noe can make anyone see the light except Jesus Christ.
---catherine on 1/21/08

What do you see in him? What do darkness and light have in common? You are unequally yoked, which the Bible warns against, and you face serious consequences in your relationship.
---moses on 1/21/08

Dear Friend. My hat's off to you. You are a glutton for punishment but God bless you for your efforts. You have a lot of work ahead of you but with the help of the Lord your boyfriend might come to Christ, one day. Are you a Christian, my friend? If so, how did you get involved with someone who does not believe in or does not even Love your God? How can this happen? When are we going to start reading and believing the Word of God. God is not a toy to be played with or blatantly disobeyed.
---Robyn on 5/7/07

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hey it's stephanie thanks for the responses! i did break up with him and have not talked to him for a couple of weeks. i do know from his friend though that he is going to church with her. it may just be for me, but pray that it will one day be for his ownself. i love him and i know he loves me. and yes god may not want him to be the one for me but of course i can't help but think one day we may be together again. please pray for him!
---Stephanie on 3/6/07

We can not change anyone. I have been there and done that. I have tried to help someone see the light and the situation got worse. It doesn't work. Let go and let God. If this man is for you God will save him and marry you, if not then let him go. However, he is an unbeliever at the moment and you are unequally yoked with him. I suggest praying to God, and putting some distant between the two of you.
---Rhonda on 3/2/07

Just because your friend is attending church with you, I would not assume that he is going just go impress you. Many people who have no faith really are looking for it. I have a good friend who refused to date a man because she wanted a true Christian relationship. He agreed to go to church with her and see what it was all about. He now goes to church on his own on occasions when she cannot attend, and they are planning to marry soon. He wants a church wedding. Talk to him about how hist beliefs..
---Dorothy on 2/12/07

By the same token we don't want to be lazy and complacent about converting. What i mean is we need to get a sense of balance that we have really thought about what we should say and are filled with grace when we say it, otherwise it will come across as shrill and scarey.
---Ed on 2/12/07

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No, we are not called to force religion ON anyone, that wouldn't work anyways. You need to know a thing or two. When true christians has to stomach all the filth that this WORLD has. I REST MY CASE.
---catherine on 2/11/07

It's not right to "force" anything on anyone, including religon. If he comes to christianity thats fine, but if he becomes jewish, wiccan, or even a baptist that's his choice. Everybody is different and its important that everybody finds a religon that personally suits them. Trying to change your spouse is something all spouses seems to do and is usually a losing battle. If he doesnt go with your religon I wouldnt lose any sleep over it, christianity just isnt for him then.
---Gef on 2/11/07

I have a lot of friends who married unbelievers, some ended up becoming like their spouses, lost their first love to God, and backsliden and never attended worship services anymore. It is a good thing to obey the word of God because GOD'S CHOICE IS THE BEST.
---dela3435 on 2/6/07

Some of the greatest salesmen in the world are men who are after women. Just because he is now going to church is not really much if his mind is focused on you. (It may be real, but it's probably just a "sales" move.) This may sound harsh, but it's reality. All that will happen if you continue this relationship is you will be going from the "pan" into the "fire". You should walk away now. (A temporary hurt now is better than a permanent ache later.)
---wivv on 2/3/07

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faye4464, what about your flesh and soul. You are more than just spirit.
---Ryan on 1/24/07

faye4464, let me be more clear. The words used to define our trichotomous nature are
Spirit: in Greek -pneuma- in Hebrew -ruwach-
Soul: in Greek -psuche- in Hebrew -nephesh-
Flesh: in Greek -sarx- in Hebrew -basar-
So you see faye we are more than just spirit. In fact, if we were only spirit and we know the spirit within all men returns to God, Ecc 12:7, what would be the purpose of a resurrection? If we were just spirit why would we look forward to new bodies?
---Ryan on 1/24/07

Ryan, you are a spirit. You are nothing without your spirit. You go where your spirit goes. Do you believe that Jesus came in the flesh and died on the cross to save you? Have you asked God to forgive you for your sins? Do you trust Jesus for everything? If so, then "to die is gain." I honestly can't wait to die. I can't wait to jump into the arms of Jesus and be free from this world. This world is not my home. I'm just passing through. My treasures are laid up somewhere beyond the blue.
---faye4464 on 1/24/07

I don't believe that I would broadcast this, especially a believer.And I would not broadcast this, if I was an unbeliever. for the whole world to know. no-no.
---CATHERINE on 1/24/07

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faye4464, I am crossing blogs. YOur response on the "Is Death a Type of Sleep' blog indicates you do not acknowledge what scripture has to say about the dead. When you die you do not go immediately to heaven. When one dies, whether wicked or righteous, the flesh turns to dust, the soul goes to Sheol and the spirit returns to God. It is this concept you will not accept that is 100% grounded in scripture.
---Ryan on 1/24/07

Ryan, why do you think I have a problem with death?
---faye4464 on 1/23/07

God many times depending on the circumstances, instructed not to have compassion.

All of this compassion talk. Please show how you justify? Aren't you just hanging this madam out to dry?

Would God have us cast his sheep to the wolves?

Depending the level of involvement, 9 of 10 this will just continue any inappropriate activity.
---TDG on 1/23/07

faye4464, I see why you have a problem with death. I am sorry to hear of your fiance. I do hope to meet him in the first resurrection.
---Ryan on 1/23/07

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faye4464, you have my sympathy and I praise you for what you did for your fiance. Yes, I believe he is with Jesus.
Stephanie: I wouldn't push him, but just be an example of what a Christian is like. Has your preacher talked to him anymore? Does your boyfriend ask you any questions regarding Christianity? If you don't know the answers go to your preacher and ask him what to say.
---Norma7374 on 1/22/07

I agree with Pharisee.
---faye4464 on 1/21/07

The Bible says do not be unequally yoked to unbelievers. He WILL only pull you down. If you do stay, they is a price to pay. You have to endure praying for and ministering to him constantly (which is work). He might never even change, who knows. You might even become a backslider, who knows. This is what you have to face if you do not leave him.
---Leslie on 1/20/07

There's nothing wrong with being friends with the intention of seeing him in Christ.

While I agree that you shouldn't set your heart on being with him, I don't think you should walk away entirely either.

You started something, you got him into church, finish that no matter what.

God does care for us enough to not want our hearts broken, but what he cares about most is your relationship to Jesus, don't compromise that.
---Pharisee on 1/20/07

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Stephanie, the Word says not to be unequally yoked. That applies to friends as well as husbands and wives. However, I must tell you about my fiance. He was totally against Christianity when we met. Slowly he warmed up and realized that he had just been hurt by judgmental Christians. One day he cried like a baby and said the Lord had spoken to him. He died a month before we were to be married but I KNOW he went to be with Jesus.
---faye4464 on 1/19/07

Dump him!

I had someone I thought I was interested in until I got saved and ask where they going to do the same. They were honest and said they would not. So I dump them right on the spot. You cannot play with God's instructions, you weaken them by doing such.

The fear(revere and phobia) is the beginning of knowledge and wisdom.

Now been marriage to a wonderful lady for over 22 years. I did it God's way. The results speaks for themselves.

To God be the glory!
---TDG on 1/19/07

the point that i want to understand before i can answer your question is that did you know he was an atheist before you dated him or you knew and dated him anyway because if the second part is your answer i think dating an unbeliver is not what GOD expected us to do because darkness and light can never go together,another point that i want you to understand is that he must be willing to change. and if you want to talk more email to sebag7388
---sebaga on 1/19/07

Stephanie - You are unequally yoked with your boyfriend. If you want to obey God, part with him. Then never stop praying for the Lord to open his eyes.
---Helen_5378 on 1/19/07

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Stephanie - You are unequally yoked with your boyfriend. If you want to obey God, part with him. Then never stop praying for the Lord to open his eyes.
---Helen_5378 on 1/19/07

But staying with him is walking away from GOD.
His only hope is in Christ Jesus.
You can be a better help to him by distancing yourself from him. Show him the strength in Loving an almighty God. Allow him to be ministered to by your Pastor, and your Christian walk as you abide by the word of God. It's possible that deliverance will be so powerful to him, he may see you as a sinner when he accepts Christ.
---lynet on 1/18/07

I want...I want...

Christianity is not about what you want.
---Ryan on 1/18/07


If you really want to go about it with the right approach, acknowledge and obey the word of God. 2 Corinthians 6:14, "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?"
---BRUCE5656 on 1/18/07

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That would be dating evangelism. Hoping you can get that fish cleaned up before you take him to the altar. It's quite common, but seldom successful. It usually flounders.

But you can give it the old college try. The Bible says a Christian is to marry a Christian. I'm finding that right before unequally yoked couples take the leap, they give us a drive-by. We give advice and they marry the unbeliever.

The right approach would be to drop this boyfriend and save yourself a life of hell.
---Cindy on 1/18/07

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