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Thoughts About Dating Sites

How do you feel about Christian on-line "dating" sites, seeking friendships or seeking mates? Do you ever feel that people are seeking to find Mr. or Ms. Perfect and that you get "left behind."?

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 ---Just_Me on 1/26/07
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I have shared with the other pastors in our community about several instances of people in our congregation who have found a mate on the internet and have left home, job, and family to fly off to live happily ever after. So far, in my case and with all other pastors these relationships have turned into absolute shipwreck. Just giving some real statistics.
If I knew my car had a 99% chance of getting into an accident today I'd be crazy to go for a ride.
---john on 11/1/07


Yes, I do. It seems that alot of the men on one of the christian sites that I visit (not this one) are looking for some fantasy proverbs 31 woman. They want a woman that does it all, has it all..house, degree, wealth, looks, good credit, articulate, excellent body, workout every day etc. Oh yes and she can be saved too.lol. Most of these men are financially set, but spiritually lacking.
---Chris on 2/14/07


Yes, I do. It seems that alot of the men on one of the christian sites that I visit (not this one) are in search of a "fantasy" proverbs 31 woman. They want a woman that does it all: clean, cook, garden, entertain etc... has it all: degree, House, wealth, looks, good credit, articulate, meticulate, excellent body, workout every day, SUBMISSIVE ON THIER TERMS, etc. Oh yes and she can be saved too.lol. Most of these men are financially set, but spiritually lacking.
---Chris on 2/14/07


I think you can find non-sincere people anywhere - even in your own church. I would say that a majority of us that have our profiles on these sites are not weird or anything like that. G-d can bring a husband and wife together through internet sites as easily as he can through your local church. Just let him do it.
---phyla3656 on 2/9/07


Yes, and she lets you play that blasted organ music. She must be a saint.
---Todd on 1/29/07




John said: "So far, in my case and with all other pastors these relationships have turned into absolute shipwreck."

Don't generalize. I'd be very interested to know how those people handled their chatting and/or phone calls. Where they serious or flirty?

I prayed a bit with her before meeting but the majority of our time was talking about whom each of us is and we did it with great honesty.

Some inject nonsense, and some inject dignity. We chose the latter.
---Caring on 1/29/07


Is it so hard to detect if a person is honest or lying on the net? Don't you people "feel" the "tone of voice" of the person you're chatting with?

I made many friends on the Net and met several of them. Not once did I find any of them different from what I've known through chatting. The suspicious ones, I simply dump them.
---Caring on 1/29/07


Just_Me - if anyone tries to depict himself as Mr Perfect, you have good reasons to run away from him. If you're a man, reverse the gender above.

I'm not Mr Perfect but my wife accepts me and loves me and I accepted her and loved her. We were distant before we met and met here, on CN.
---Caring on 1/29/07


1Col 2:10 ... for the Spirit makes search into all things...
Mat 7:12 All those things, then, which you would have men do to you, even so do you to them: because this is the law and the prophets.
Rom 8:28 And we are conscious that all things are working together for good to those who have love for God, and have been marked out by his purpose.
1Col13 love....
---dsda on 1/28/07


I believe it is very dangerous. Because anyone can lie over the computer. And there are alot of sick people out there who can be sly about getting personnel information.

This is true. I seek friendship, not a mate. But as I was looking to find friendship, I came across one add that said, "If you don't have your picture posted, then do not write to me. It would be a waste of my time and your time."
---Just_Me on 1/28/07




I believe it is very dangerous. Because anyone can lie over the computer. And there are alot of sick people out there who can be sly about getting personnel information. I met my husband at a truck stop where I (used) to work. About a month after talking we started dating and have been together ever since. Little over 8 years. My husband isn't perfect (I'm glad of that) and neither am I, but we are perfect for eachother. but whomever you date, do a background check
---Rebecca_D on 1/27/07


For Anonymous: Questions: 1. NO. 2 N/A 3. NO. 4. - I AGREE.

For Dave: Questions: 1. NO. 2. NO. 3. NO. 4. NO.

Why are you twisting the question around to make it some sort of battle?
---Just_Me on 1/27/07


1. CAUTION! I know people who have met, dumped & remarried 3 or 4 times thru' internet because they just can't find the right one! (New mates are never told their mating history!) I know people who rushed into marriage because of ease of internet dating but didn't truly know the person and deeply regret it. I have experienced the fit man who turned out to be 70 lbs. overweight, to say nothing of the other lies!
---Mary_Ann on 1/26/07


2. I have been one of the victims of the guy who is still searching the sites for something better while claiming to love me. I know people who have met & are happily married. So I say caution is the best approach! I am now dating seriously a man I met on a site. He was a local guy - horror stories led me to decide to only meet local men. Our first meeting was not a date but at a Christian singles function, as was our second.
---Mary_Ann on 1/26/07


3. Then we had normal dates and got to know each other in a normal manner - to me this is important. Internet chatting, although fun, is not real life and meeting a few times long distance before marriage (as my sister did) is not real life. Use wisdom and don't fall for anything until you know it for sure. Time is important - don't rush! Internet skews real life so get the real life version before you make any life-changing choices.
---Mary_Ann on 1/26/07


There are unscropulus agencies in this area who are out to make money do not give yout Credit card Number or else ZAP!& you are a victim.
---Emcee on 1/26/07


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Left behind? No such thing, as Mr. & Mrs. Perfect.
Are you in that love and desperation mode?
Are you basing your criteria on looks?
Are you flipping through the choices and not finding anyone that fills your resume, list of qualities you're looking for?
Are you going to run off to Alaska and look for eligible partners?
---Dave on 1/26/07


Are you 48 and very pretty?

If so, quit looking in the mirror like a parakeet and stop kissing yourself.

Do you think you could be mirroring yourself?
You're looking for Mr. Perfect.

Jesus Christ is Perfect in every way.
---anonymous on 1/26/07


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