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I Just Cheated On My Wife

I've committed the worst of marrital sins. I cheated on my wife and of course she now is considering divorce. I know how badly i've wronged, but don't want to lose her. I TRUELY know that she is my one and only on this earth. Am I wrong for begging her to stay?

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 ---Terry on 8/17/07
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Here u are saying you cheated on your wife and she is your one and only, but u cheat ! How can u hurt a person u really truely deep down inside LOVE!when I was in love and the male cheated on me I still did not cheat on him! I could not hurt a person I really was in love with! Are you really sorry you cheated on her in your heart, or sorry you got caught! Are you remourseful for what you done or sad because of the consequences? Seek God on this! God Bless
---leandra on 9/7/07


That is a tough question Biblically. Scripture only addresses wives that are unfaithful not husbands. The unfaithful wives were stoned.
---yoshin on 8/18/07


I appreciate the time each of you has taken to write your comments. I take each of them with open ears mind and heart. Luckily she has agreed that we should go to see our pastor, not just alone, but together. It may seem small but it gives me great hope. It's hard for her at times but we do have short conversations. Some good, some not so good. But I'm thankful that it's something at all.
---Terry on 8/17/07


Yes you are. You need to back off and let her make her own decisions. If she leaves, there is no one to blame but you. If she stays and tries to work things out. Don't push her into trusting you again. Trust now-a-days is hard to come by. Once you done someone wrong, it is hard to gain that trust back.
---Rebecca_D on 8/17/07


I've told her that I want to, and will, do anything and everything that I can to try to regain her trust. This is still a fresh revelation and I know it will take lots of time and healing, but she says she cant't get the aweful images that this has created out of her mind. She doesn't know if she ever will. I've told her that I will wait as long as she needs to gain focus on her direction from here. How do I help this process?
---Terry on 8/17/07




Have you asked her for forgiveness? It will be tough to prove your faithfulness to her again. She is within her rights biblically and legally to divorce you. You must do everything you can to show her you are trustworthy and pray, pray , PRAY. I wish you the best.
---betty8468 on 8/17/07


Don't expect her to right away change her mind. It might take quite awhile. Your actions now and in the future may help her forgive you. Forgetting is much harder and takes much longer. Give her time.
---TT on 8/17/07


Well, my husband just told me Monday that he has been cheating for the past 3 months with a women at his work. He did come clean and tell me and he is begging for us to reconcile. All I can tell you is repent and pray that God will help you both work thru this because it truly is not something you can do on your own.
---Becky on 8/17/07


Terry, you are not wrong for begging her to stay, however it will take much more than just begging to repair the damage that's been done. First, repent to her and to God. Receive the forgiveness when they extend it to you. Second, go to counselling together and one on one. Trust is a hard thing to rebuild, but it's not impossible. Reinforce to your wife that you made a mistake and want to take all of the correct measures you can.
---Donna on 8/17/07


I didn't cheat on my wife. This is Marcia Kathr. When you expose her facade, she uses your name, posts questions with them or writes mean nasty answers.. This is the real her. She's everywhere.

I can see her and because I wrote this, she posted this question.

"Marcia Kathr, it's always been true for you, whether you pretend that you're 23 or 58. That part has always been true for you."

---Terry on 8/17/07




Don't just talk a good line
Do what she asks and do it willingly
if your honest she'll realize it - if your just a cheat you need to realize it.

Get some pastoral counseling to save what's left of your marriage
---Andrea on 8/17/07


Tell her what you told us.
You've betrayed her trust and it will take a lot to win that back. If you've been a good husband all along, it will be easier but if you've neglected her all along it will be much more difficult.
---robin8683 on 8/17/07


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