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Husband Is Unbiblical

I have been born again for 20 years, and my husband has been for 3 years. How am I supposed to submit to him or seek his counsel in spiritual matters when I feel in my spirit that he is saying something unbiblical or not spiritually accurate? He very often acts like he knows so much and I don't.

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 ---Beth on 10/8/07
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Wow, you guys can be hard on a wife sometimes! :( This woman is in a very sad marriage and I have been in her shoes--and they REALLY HURT! :( Show some compassion on her--or TRY walking in her shoes.
---Mary on 10/9/07


Beth wrote: We are indeed reaping what we sowed. We got married because we wanted to have sex...

Now the truth comes out. There may be guilt issues attached, and you want out of the marriage due to guilt over sin.

Before you get out, and make a bad mistake into a worse mistake, I remain adamant on my original advice:

---John_T on 10/9/07

Is there any chance, Beth, that YOU are the one who is being unbiblical or spiritually inaccurate?

Maybe he DOES happen to know more than you do.

Sounds to me like you're looking for excuses to be unsubmissive.

You're not the only woman posting to these sites with this problem.
---Jack on 10/9/07

Beth, I do understand what you are going through. One thing that I have learned is that the choices we make along this journey that we are on, bring conquences, whether good or bad. God has taught me many lessons by the choices that I have made since I was saved almost 10 years ago. One thing that I do agree with is what JohnT said , Christian counceling and by all means PRAY! There is power in Prayer.
---Cynthia on 10/9/07

In response to your question, I think you might be the one who needs to double check your stance. You must re-read what your position is as the woman. You my dear are to submit to your mate. Not saying that you are not right but you first must understand god's design. You can also hinder your husband by making him feel inferior to you. Remember God can rise up whom he wants when he wants. Keep yourself and your husband lifted. In addition, I advise humbleness. You will.You both will be blessed in the end.
---amelia on 10/9/07

This is not a pride issue. I KNOW that there will be areas where my husband knows more than I do in spiritual matters. I just get frustrated because he acts like he is always right and that I'm always listening to the devil and not hearing from God. I get sick of hearing that. We are indeed reaping what we sowed. We got married because we wanted to have sex, and I got married KNOWING with all my heart that it was NOT God's will, and now I am paying for it with an unhappy marriage.
---Beth on 10/9/07

I am supposed to submit to the man I married.... the man who judges me when I am troubled instead of offering comfort? I cannot go to him when I need comfort because he will find fault with me and criticize me. He gets impatient with me all the time. I feel so bad about myself, knowing how I annoy him. I don't know how to deal with this.
---Beth on 10/9/07



I see great problems in your post, it reeks of condescension and condemnation, it is based on "years being a Christian" rather than love. There has to be more than you present above.

Therefore I have three words for you:
---John_T on 10/9/07

This is a perfect opportunity to allow both of you to grow together, in the Lord. You could set aside a certain amt. of time, per week or daily, to study the scriputures together, and if you have something in particular that you need answers on, you could both look to see what the answers are and share them with each other, there is nothing that can bring you closer together than this. It will be very rewarding, and very worthwhile. Blessings...
---Gayla on 10/8/07

Do you respect your husband? Treat him with enough respect to allow him to be wrong but be open and honest and eternally grateful that he desires to be the spiritual head of the house.
---Andrea on 10/8/07

Do what is scriptual.

Discuss it with him first, but make your case first by knowing the bible. If he continues, bring in two people to discuss the issue. At the same time continually pray about it. If the issue at hand is not discussed, it will cause a rift between you and him. But always make up before the sun sets.
---Steveng on 10/8/07

Amen I agree with Catherine. The Lord should always be first in your life. If your husband is asking you to do something that you know is against the word of God, then if it was me, I would tell him that what he is asking you to do is unbiblical. We are to submit to our husbands, but not when it is contrary to the word of God. Jesus Christ should be your first love. God bless you both!
---Cynthia on 10/8/07

I would not dream of giving anyone advice on a sensitive domestic problem like this. A blog site is no place for such questions.
---InimicusStultitiae on 10/8/07

It is a tough call. The Bible is clear that women are to submit to their husbands as unto the Lord. We do this because we love God And because we don't want to make a scene. But, we do not submit if we are asked to do something that is in direct contradiction to the word of God. Go ahead and pray, if you need to. Also, if God has already spoken to you directly on an issue, then you are always to obey God. This applies to all types of men in authority. us poor weaklings who just loves God.
---catherine on 10/8/07

Just because you have been a Christian for 20 years and your husband hasn't, that doesn't mean he knows less than you. I know people that have been serving the Lord for almost all of their life and are still being taught about God. If you know your husband is saying something that doesn't line up with the word of God, then why go to him in the first place?
---Rebecca_D on 10/8/07

A woman is to be gental and have quite spirit. It does not say that you may not use the word of God to show your Baby Christian the truth of what is taught in the Bible. Do not become discouraged or resentful. Rejoyce that he has been saved and use prayer to ask God to give him Wisdom without doubt and with a gental spirit, use the Word of God to show him unbiblical choices. However, do so in humility,love and truth always encouraging him that it is wonderful that God has SAVED HIM.
---splaa6685 on 10/8/07

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