Your past is under the blood. so what is under the blood stays under the blood. I wouldn't say anything to your husband unless you want to stir up strife. |
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---Rebecca_D on 2/9/08 |
Getting forgiveness from God is easy. What's not so easy is getting forgiveness from another person. This is a deledate subject and should not be taken lightly. On this "Christian Bolgs" is not the place for an answer since all you'll get are personal opinions for the most part. Talk with your pastor, or better, seek the advice of a Christian Marriage Counselor. |
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---wivv on 2/6/08 |
I committed adultery in my own marriage and this one is a no-brainer. You HAVE to tell your spouse. The fact that you have asked this question shows it is eating at you. Read David's account in 1Samuel of what he went through while concealing his sin. Bring it into the light and leave the circumstances up to God!! |
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---Charles on 12/31/07 |
Dear One,
My husband committed adultry on me years ago . God has since restored our marriage. I wish he would not have told me, but just repented to God and made it up to me some other way. If you do not have any diseases, thank God and don't break your husband's heart now. Confess to someone else if you need to take care and God bless |
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---Charlene on 12/30/07 |
The reason I asked that question is that I have seen similar situations where one spouse has ulterior motives in wanting to tell of their long ago sin. Many times they are wanting out of the relationship and find this to be an easy way to do it. |
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---Susie on 12/29/07 |
Obviously the Holy Spirit convicts hearts and minds. It's a good sign for those who want to make things right. This is a very common problem amoung Christian men and women today. It can only be answered from scripture.-Matt 5:42-44
Exodus 20:13-17,Ephesians 4:25. Any Christian in this situation should seek GOD's instructions and Safe Christian counseling for guidance. My prayers are with you and your family. God has a heavan or Hell to put people in, so fear God and keep His commandments. |
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---yochanon on 12/27/07 |
Staying silent to cover sin and robbing your spouse of the biblical option of leaving you is 9 X out 10, all about the money. The other tenth hinges on the children.
When adultery is hidden, one spouse usually holds the purse strings. They could be the major breadwinner or stand to inherit the family's fortune.
The adulterer will hang in there for the money. They will bemoan their horrible marriage but they'll hang in there like a bulldog waiting for the 'carots', money. |
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---Cindy on 12/27/07 |
Adultery is deceit. Telling lies travels with deceit. If money is holding you there, like a puppet on a string, it could snap.
Lies of adultery - rob your spiritual bank. Making spiritual decisions for spouse that may or may not want to be tied to deceit.
If you tell your husband, he chooses to forgive you completely, you are married to someone who will see their "reward" for being a man after God's heart. If he decides to leave, he'll be within boundaries of the Word. |
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---Cindy on 12/27/07 |
Nancy, you've covered home base, but what's done in secret is exposed in the Light.
At the end of our days, the spotlight shines brightly on all deeds, actions or words - good or evil - it all comes to the Light.
Staying silent is the kind of advice that Dear Abby or Ann Landers might give - but neither one of them will be standing in for the rest of us. |
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---Cindy on 12/27/07 |
Is there a reason why you would want to chance ending your marriage by telling him this now?
---Susie on 12/24/07
Yes, there's a reason to risk this. By living the lie you're now living, you run the risk of allowing it to fester, and eventually blow up on you causing even more damage. If, as someone else asked, your husband found this out on his own, do you think he would believe you, afterward? |
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---tommy3007 on 12/27/07 |
I would like to answer this question by pointing out a simple fact from the teachings of Jesus. Matthew 5:27-28 says,"Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: "
But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart."
If there's any adult person not guilty of the above described act of adultery. Please let them come forward at this time!!! So let sleeping dogs lie. |
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---Mima on 12/27/07 |
You're not being honest with your husband or yourself.
When a bank robber robs a bank, asks God for forgiveness but keeps the money for risk of being caught, what does that say about you?
A storekeeper always finds out when a store employee has been dipping in the till. |
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---Cindy on 12/26/07 |
Is there a reason why you would want to chance ending your marriage by telling him this now? |
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---Susie on 12/24/07 |
A few questions: one, would it ruin your marriage if you told him?
Two, are there any repercussions (like HIV) that your husband needs to know about?
Three, what would be your purpose in telling him?
Answer these questions, and you'll have the answer to your own. (And if the answer to #2 is 'yes', then you MUST tell him. Any silence regarding STDs is utterly reprehensible, and with regards to HIV, nothing less than attempted murder.) |
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---Nancy on 12/23/07 |
Fear of facing what's to come has caused many a well to do Christian to drop the cross and run. If by our own devices down here we find our lives we lose Christ.
In meekness and humility bear your cross, you're defrauding your husband if you keep him from his right to end your marriage for your unfaithfulness.
Jesus took a punishment he didn't deserve, how much more than should we answer for what we've done wrong? Be reconciled to your husband with your tears, he will forgive you. |
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---Pharisee on 12/23/07 |
I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go, I will guide thee with mine eye...Psalm 32:8 |
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---Dorothy on 12/22/07 |
I suppose it depends on how much this still haunts you. It seems like you still feel very guilty. Pray about it and consider how your husband might react if you told him. Only you know him well enough to estimate the outcome. Would it be worth it, telling him? Are there others who know about the affair that might tell him one day? If he ever asked you I certainly think that you should give an honest answer. |
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---RitaH on 12/22/07 |
You're not being honest with your husband or yourself.
When a bank robber robs a bank, asks God for forgiveness but keeps the money for risk of being caught, what does that say about you?
A storekeeper always finds out when a store employee has been dipping in the till. |
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---Cindy on 12/22/07 |
Only you know the real story, whether it was one time or fifty.
If you want to stop robbing your husband, you'll tell him the truth. He deserves that much. He can then decide if he wants to stay married. |
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---Cindy on 12/22/07 |
Many people tell because they can't stand the guilt and end up hurting others by trying to get it off their chest. You did wrong and admitted it and got it straight with you and God. Hopefully you have accepted his forgiveness and don't find it necessary to open a huge hurtful can of worms that may end your marriage. I don't agree with cheating but also don't think it would be beneficial in this case to now chance destroying your relationship and your husband for something that happened 5 years ago. |
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---john on 12/22/07 |
It is in the past-5 years in the past.Some people are incapable of forgiving a straying mate.Just live right from here on.The fact that you now have a guilty conscience shows you are a genuine Christian. |
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---shirley on 12/21/07 |
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