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Neglecting My Husband

How do I save my marriage when my husband tells me he's outta here and is only hanging around because of the kids? He says he doesn't know what he wants and he says he loves me but I broke the marriage by neglecting him. Please help!

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 ---Jennifer on 12/30/07
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Have the two of you sought counsel together?
It would be best to do so because the two you could get out whatever is on your hearts & see the root of things. Also another person may see things that the two of you don't see.
---Rickey on 12/31/07


If you love the man, pray that he gets his rest. Support him. After you have asked God to help, Satan will attack you with any old habits. Rebuke him and declare that you are past that milestone...all in the Blessed Name of Jesus..!! Getting angry is caused by that. Try this one: Every time as soon you feel anger comming up inside, you say: "Thank you Jesus, you are in my heart". That devil will leave you forever! Try it, it works!!
---Jeffrey on 12/31/07


Your emotions are out of control. You need to be less dependent. Some women forsake all of their friends, family, everybody for that man/boyfriend. You have a dependent personality. You are expecting much more from these people than they are able to give back to you. Develop more hobbies and diversions and you won't be so dependent on others for your happiness. Jesus is the best friend you can have,by the way. He is never tired,upset and he loves so good. Try Him. You will like Him.
---Robin on 12/31/07


Jennifer, don't feel alone - I am in the same boat lately and am going to get my hormone levels checked, I feel like I am out of control with my emotions. Ask God to help you stay calm and get a full medical, just to rule out any physical issues.
---Marcia on 12/31/07


Jennifer, You cannot get rid of the darkness in your life by "dealing with it" and trying to shovel it out the door. You must increase the light of God's Word in your life. More light, less darkness. Make sense?

Always remember the believers who have gone before, and keep looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of faith, so you don't get weary and faint in your mind (Heb 12:1-4). Remember, we all are changed into his image just by looking at him (2 Cor 3:18).
---Marcia on 12/31/07




Jennifer it sounds like you need to walk in his shoes for a while. Get him to talk even if he's angry and just listen to everything he says and take it to heart even where you don't agree with him.

I was once the man who was leaving and I know that I had my mind made up. Even in my wife's tears and pleading I had no compassion. Pray that it's not too late and that the Lord would soften his heart to you. Keep in mind you may do all that you can and he might still leave, but it's worth a try.
---Pharisee on 12/31/07


Neglect does not break a marriage. Giving up does. It is very possible that you can save your marriage by stopping the neglect. At least it's a place to start. I'm sure he could make some improvements too.
---john on 12/31/07


Procrastination on your part does not constitute an emergency on our part to fix your life.
You're barking up the wrong tree, anyway.

You should be at the foot of the Cross, asking God to fix your life.
---Mike on 12/31/07


Some men feel neglected when children are born. If he feels neglected ask him how you are neglecting him. If he has valid reasons and you can see that he is right try to rectify this. If he feels neglected because you have to do more for other members of the family than he thinks is right then suggest he gets involved. The more help he gives you the more time you will have see to his needs. Make sure he realises that you also have needs though. Mum's needs are often the most neglected of all.
---RitaH on 12/31/07


He says he loves you.
Do you love him?
---alan_of_UK on 12/31/07




Sounds to me like he is neglecting "And I will very gladly spend and be spent for your souls, though the more abundantly I love you, the less I am loved." (2 Corinthians 12:15) But humbly ask how he feels you have neglected him, and just listen him out??? Including, "What else?" until he runs out??? "swift to hear, slow to speak" (in James 1:19) And do whatever sounds like you really can do better. Trusting God to make you honest about this. We love you, God bless you!!!
---Bill_bila5659 on 12/30/07


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