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Boyfriend Talking To Girl

My boyfriend of 1 year, is friends with his ex-girlf since their 3 yr relationship 12+ yrs ago. He talks with her every few weeks. This friendship makes me upset, but I am wrong for feeling the way I do because he's not "doing anything wrong" he'll always say.

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 ---Kathy on 4/7/08
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It is best to have a good foundation which I think is trust. Tell him how you feel also remember he is with you and if that is all there are doing then its fine. Why not invite her to the movies with you for a girls night out. That will show both of them that you are not intemadated by her and that you trust him. Keep the communication alive talk to him
---Tracy on 7/18/08

Hi there Kathy! i know how you feel! I wanna tell you that aside from us here praying for you and your relationship, Jesus is the Greatest Healer and He hears all your cry! Go to Him and Tell Him everything you feel and your hurts! I know He will answer you! Believe in me, God works in Amazing ways, no one can ever explain! Psalm 118:34 "God is close to the broken-hearted and with a Contrite Spirit" God Bless you! you can send me a reply here in Christian net with my username: kathe6889
---katherine on 6/16/08

jealousy left unchecked now will cause certain discontentment later if this relationship turns into something more ...since you're not engaged ...NOW is the time to step away for a breather ...stepping away LATER causes a mess ...this isn't a game it's your inability to deal with an ongoing 12 year friendship that was there when you began dating a year ago ...stepping away allows you to reevaluate what you want from a relationship and your own unresolved feelings true to yourself first
---Rhonda on 4/11/08

That's exactly what happens. Many, many say, "I do" on the first meeting.

Dinner and "dancing", they are saying "I do". God sees, God knows. Call it a soul tie, call it fornication, call it a mess. I do, on the first meeting, then the dating for months or years. When it falls apart, they wonder, why me? That's why, they said, I do on the first meeting.
---Ted on 4/9/08

At whatever point you say, "I do", if it's before the marriage, when the mess crops up down the road in your field of weeds, snakes and spiders - you will have wished you'd waited on God.
---Ted on 4/9/08

Pharisee: Having a boyfriend is not childish. How can two people get to know each other and possibly get married if their not boyfriend and girlfriend first? Should they just say I do from the moment upon meeting?
---Rebecca_D on 4/9/08

Hi there, Kathy . . . well, first of all, it looks like he has been talking with her, like this, for years . . . but "every few weeks" . . . not every night or whatever (o: Don't you talk with other people, every few *days*, even?

Every few weeks is not when I'd be talking with someone who was interesting to me. It would be more like each day. But you have feelings. Feelings can be a pathological lier (o: Like worry sure can be (o:
---Bill_bila5659 on 4/8/08

First of all the whole "boyfriend" thing is possessive and childish. You're not married.

Next if this man can't see that what's good for you is good for him he has no mind to be married and probably less the mind of Christ.

Where does that leave you in ten years?
A whole house full of chores and kids tugging on your clothes all day with a man impassioned only for the things he has interest in.
YOU follow Jesus, he'll lead you away from messes like this.
---pharisee on 4/8/08

You're not married and it should probably stay that way. He's apparently tied back to the former and not ready to commit to the latter. The former makes it easier not to commit to the latter. If jealous, you should move on, before he leaves you holding onto hope of a promise that may not come.
---Ted on 4/8/08

It is jealousy mt dear. You are jealous at the fact that he talks to someone whom he shared 3 years of his life with. I have been married for almost 10 years and if I see my husband talking to a women, (even while he's a Police Officer) I get jealous. I know my husband's heart and where it lies. Do you know your boyfriend's heart and where it lies?
---Rebecca_D on 4/8/08

No, you are not wrong in your feelings. While there may not be anything going on, (at least that's what he's saying), just out of respect for you and your feelings, he should stop.
---wivv on 4/7/08

You are not doing anything wrong. It is normal to be concerned about your relationship.

It sounds as though your boyfriend is more interested in his long-time fantasy girl than he is with you. I would confront him about this. Ask him which "girl" is he truely interested in.

If he doesn't clearly SAY, and DEMONSTRATE, that you are the focus of his attention, I would call the relationship off and find a new boyfriend.
---sag on 4/7/08

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