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My Infant Son Died

I heard someone say "God always wants to heal". My infant son died. If he is all-knowing, did he choose not to heal? Did my son's death serve a greater purpose so God allowed it?

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 ---Simon on 5/4/08
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I too lost my son. I just wish I could connect with him to know he is alright.
I feel it is not right to make too much of a similarity with God allowing his son to die ... God does not have a struggle with faith... I am sorry to say that I struggle even more since my son's passing
---R on 5/28/11


I donot know why God didn't save your son, only he knows, but I do know God isn't the cause of it. It was more of a medical nature or his health wise.What God can do now is help you heal through this process & maybe if and when it is time to bless you with a healthy baby that won't die as an infant.
---candice on 1/21/11


God knows. When we are in the throes of a certain trauma we may not see or understand God's imediate plan, until much later in life when more time and happenings have come to pass. It may be that God has spared your baby from a horrible evil that would have happened, like unspeakable abuse or a mutilating accident or soimething. But if you and/or the other parent is a Christian, then your baby is in a better place than earth, and you will be reunited again.
---Eloy on 1/21/11


God knows. When we are in the throes of a certain trauma we may not see or understand God's immediate plan, until much later in life when more time and happenings have come to pass. It may be that God has spared your baby from a horrible evil that would have happened, like unspeakable abuse or a mutilating accident or something. But if you and/or the other parent is a Christian, then your baby is in a better place than earth, and you will be reunited again.
---Eloy on 1/21/11


A tiny face and tiny body,
Two tiny hands and feet,
Rest expectantly in the arms of an enormous God
Waiting for the uniting once again.
Tears will be wiped away
And sorrow, once known so intimately,
Will turn to endless joy.
And the years long past
Will fade in the discovery that you have always been here.

*written to a friend of mine who just uncelebrated the one year anniversary of her baby's passing yesterday*
---Linda on 1/21/11




I have a friend who just today grieved the one year anniversary of the passing of her baby. When I got up this morning and saw her post on facebook, words began to come to me while I wept with her. I will put them here for you also:

A tiny face and tiny body,
Two tiny hands and feet,
Rest expectantly in the arms of an enormous God
Waiting for the uniting once again.
Tears will be wiped away
And sorrow, once known so intimately,
Will turn to endless joy.
And the years long past
Will fade in the discovery that you have always been here.
---Linda_Smith on 1/21/11


My heart cries for your loss. I also lost a precious daughter with brain cancer. God did heal her and she is in heaven. God never makes a mistake. He is all knowing and I must wonder if He saved my daughter from something in her future that would have been worse. Your little one is in heaven and will never have to face tradegy here on earth.
---shira3877 on 1/21/11


To both Sara and the original poster, I am deeply, deeply sorry. Sara, my mom lost a son too and for years she blamed God, she no longer does and I pray you find peace someday soon.
---Mary on 1/20/11


Why would God do this? I've had 2 other children out of wedlock and had one in and our wonderful son born in wedlock died! Though I love my 2 other children I just don't understand GOD. I do it wrong and he's great and I do it "right" and he takes him away for no reason. I've lost faith. Can't walk into the church anymore. Hope someday I can.
---Sara on 1/20/11


To Whosoever has an ear to hear?

Christ healed us by the Passion of His stripes!!

If we love God & believe in His Word that all things work together for the good of those who love Him, then we also believe that the death of our love ones are working in this greater purpose as well.

God didn't allow or choose to not heal mankind. Since the beginning God continuously drew & guided man away from the evils of sin, starting with forewarning man about the wages that lead to death.

God loves and wants the world to be whole & healed so much, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but would have everlasting life by receiving the wholeness of His healing Word.
---Shawn_M.T. on 11/3/08




Simon,
My sister's baby died of SIDS when he was 4 months old. It was one of the saddest days I've ever wittnessed. I'll never forget the day of visitation how she cried over his coffin. Words can't describe it, hearing her grieve for her little boy, I'll never forget it. In time though, God helped her to find joy. We both became Christians after his death and believe many lives will be saved because of it. As devastating as life can be, scripture says that all things work for the good of those who love God.
Romans 8:28

I'll pray that God lifts you up and fills you with joy and peace boyond all understanding. God does that you know, because He can. Philipians 4:7

Also, I truly believe you will see your child again.
---Kathy on 10/3/08


Along time ago, I had a vision. I saw spirits floating in the air. But, thats not the important thing. I felt them, the love, I dont know how to explain this. I felt it and I know they felt me. Why, this happen to me, I dont know. I was no saint. I can say, I know, I love you without knowing you. I can also say, I know he loves us, all of us. I dont want to be here, any more. Believe me! I just started crying! Try to understand your love ones are with him now. I know this is true!

This love will not kill you. But, I know it will burn inside your spirit, so bad it will hurt.
---Frank on 8/21/08


I weep and feel for you and your family. I am still in mourning over losing my son a few short weeks ago. He was only 24 yrs old. To lose a child is a terrible cup to have to drink from.
God never makes errors. Your baby received the ultimate healing(death) and you must believe that in order to begin to heal yourself.
We all have a time to leave this earth. Your beautiful baby's time was up. God controls that-- we don't. Please begin to love and worship God even through your great pain. I do understand. My love and prayers are with you angel. God comfort and bless you.
---Robyn on 8/19/08


My heart goes out to you. There is no greater pain than loss of a child. This is a time to lean on the Lord and let him bring comfort to you.

Nobody can answer the questions you ask...except God, and He's not required to explain such things to us. Please don't torture yourself with these questions. All any of us can do in situations like this is to say as Job did.."Though He slay me, yet shall I trust him". This is the very essence of faith.

May I also add that though it's a tragic loss for you, your child will never suffer heart break, be a crime victim, go to war, or be mislead into a tragic life of drug abuse. He has gone directly to the arms of Jesus.
---Donna66 on 8/18/08


Now, I will just be honest with you. God does not always want to heal a person. If God healed me of all my afflictions I would be so superior. What's your problem, would be my attitude. Understand what I am saying?? "To serve a greater purpose", you have hit it right on the nail.
---catherine on 8/18/08


If the one or both of the parents are Christian, then what better place for the infant to be than in paradise with my Lord in heaven, saved from the violence and suffering of this godless world.
---Eloy on 8/18/08


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Gods ways are higher than our ways. We are to trust him, in all situations. In the good times, and in the bad. Some, turn away from the faith, when this happens, my own dad, being one of them, turned to the bottle, when his son died at 2 years of age. Which is better, to serve God in trust, or to turn from him, and walk in the flesh? There is no good thing, that comes from walking in the flesh.
---gayla on 8/17/08


God did not cause your sons death, he did allow you to grieve through the loss though.
When a person dies of something other then natural causes (old age, etc) then it is of this physical world, & physical reasons of death, nothing spiritual. Be comforted though that God is looking over your son & you can see him again when the time is right.Jsut do not forget the memories.
---Candice on 8/6/08


God knows best
in all things let us give thanks

we will get to understand His ways in due time

on wednesday, a church member returned home after work only to find her home burnt to ashes..... all the couple had left was the clothes they had on and the cars they drove to work.... they are now perching with a friend..
i was amazed when they gave a 'THANKSGIVING OFFERING' on Sunday......
giving thanks is the will of God for our lives
---patience on 7/14/08


Wow. No one will quite understand what kind of pain you must be feeling, except God. I don't know why, and I believe it's natural to scream, "God WHY!?!!" But I do believe, with ALL of my heart, that God will never take your pain and this tragedy and use it for bad or not use it at all. Know today that God Himself will comfort you when you don't have the answers. Soon you will start to understand how you will be able to understand others who have also lost a child. What a day to look forward to! That day when you will see your beautiful son again! It's coming sooner than you think! I promise, you will see him again! God is good, cry all you have out to Him. He will lift you up and make it ok. I love you & pray for you
---Kate on 7/14/08


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I'm sorry your child died no reason will ever be good enough to explain these things except we live in a world where accidents happen not all things are down to God,healing, vengeful, or evil.

Natural things occur weather good/bad a evil pedophile wins the lottery poor innocent babies die of hunger. Things cannot always be defined as cause and effect, things just happen, and some times we may never know How or even why.

One day you will find you can at least celebrate the little time you had with him and move on although it may seem pointless right now.
---Carla5754 on 7/14/08


No..God did not choose to not heal and no his death is not for a higher purpose. John 10:10 It is teaching like this in the church that cause people to turn from God. He is Good..in every way. I am sorry for your loss.
---melanie on 7/14/08


My prayers are with you. I am deeply sorry for your loss. I have 5 children and couldn't imagine one day without them. I do believe that God is in control. I know it wasn't His will for your son to die, but the bible says that God uses ALL things for good. I know it must be hard, but what if the death of your son saved someones soul? We know that your son is in heaven right now praising God. Just remember to keep your faith so that you will join him when the Lord calls for you. God bless you and your family. My family will be praying for you. GOD BLESS.
---Betty5357 on 7/12/08


Thanx, Deb. I lost a nephew the day before he was born. There is not pain to compare to this kind of tragedy. It lasts a lifetime. You just have to learn to live with it. I try not to think about it.
---frances008 on 6/10/08


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Dear Frances,

You are a class act. We don't agree on some things, but I respect you sister.

Love, Deb
---deb on 6/9/08


God does always want to heal...But, the devil always wants to kill...This is why he possesses millions of pregnant women every year so that he can convince them that killing their little baby while still in the womb is the best thing for them...There is an enemy on the loose and he is a killer...His name is devil and he hates mankind...You can read all about him in the Holy Bible...Starting with John 10:10...And he is after your words!Read the Book.
---Elisabeth on 5/24/08


"Ere sin could blight, or sorrow fade,
Death came with friendly care.
The opening bud to Heaven conveyed
And bade it blossom there."

---Samuel Taylor Coleridge
---Nancy on 5/11/08


Consider this, Simon:

God Himself knows what it's like to see His Son die.
---kumquat on 5/10/08


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Caring, I have a lot to say to you, but I respect this thread too much. Let us respect this man's space.
---frances008 on 5/9/08


"All things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose." I am sorry for your loss. Surely God had a "greater purpose" as you said. Someday, He will wipe away your tears and you will never cry again. You will also know the mysteries/whys of life. It is not our time to know everything yet.
---jody on 5/9/08


My heart goes out to you and your family over the death of your son. I have gone through a similar experience, but God is very able! Janze
---Janze on 5/9/08


I can only imagine what you are feeling. My Mom has always told me that God has a plan. As if it's in His will. There are difficult situations where we want to ask "Why?", but know God is Almighty & with a plan. Reason being I asked my Mom...why? A mother 7 months pregnant died on Christmas Day and was able to save the baby. My Mom said she saw the 4 yr old girl wipe her Daddy's tears as her Mommy lie dead in the coffin.
---iloveHim on 5/9/08


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MORE~ And recently a 16 yr. old cousin came home from school to find her Mom dead. She had delivered a baby 3 months prematurely 4 weeks prior to her death. She was only 35. Just hard to understand that God has a plan. Just remember to praise Him in your storm...He is the God who gives and takes away...Praise you in this storm by Casting Crowns. Beautiful song. He loves you and does care for you. Seek Him...because only He can help heal your heart. God bless you.
---iloveHim on 5/9/08


MORE~ Also, I heard this before. That sometimes God allows things to happen to draw us closer to Him. And I have heard of people not getting healed or did receive a healing?? Only God can give you the answer...someday when we get to Heaven, perhaps we can ask Him..But at that point, I think you will be so happy to be reunited with your baby boy! God bless you as you go through this difficult time.
---iloveHim on 5/9/08


Simon_Take comfort in this, He is in the Hands of My/our Father.
My Father will not allow you/us to endure that which you/we cannot handle.
Keep Faith, Stay Strong & Please endure these terrible times your going through right now.
My Prayers & thoughts are W/you & family.
---Duane_Dudley_Martin on 5/7/08


Frances, the devil has nothing to do with this. A loss of a child is VERY painful without any interference by the devil.

Simon would be better off to find some professional help.
---Caring on 5/7/08


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Remember, it is you that feel the grief, whereas your son is in a better place. Also, I found after I lost a close family member, that I was given tremendous grace, it was as if (1) nothing scared me any more. (2) I wanted to live my life to the full especially after a year or so had passed. I was determined the devil was not going to ruin my life by taking a loved one away.
---frances008 on 5/6/08


Simon
We have a Heavenly Father that loves and has the desires of a greater purpose for us all. He uses all things for the good of those who believe. So keep believing that the Lord is using this event for the good of all believers & you will find peace form this because God does desire all of us healed, but this will never happen if we are not listening and taking note of all that is before us, giving that glory to God's greater purpose. 2 Sam.12:12-24
---Shawn.M.T on 5/6/08


Simon, I understand a very small fraction of your pain because I almost lost one of my sons once. Keep yourself busy, and if the pain is too hard to cope with, please see a good psychologist to help you out.

May God give you and your family the comfort you need.
---Caring on 5/6/08


I heard a man today share about losing his child. Maybe this will help you.

The grieving process is important but if it goes on for years, it will destroy you.
The average grieving process is approx. for one year.

During the grieving process, God gives us an opportunity to tap into the mind and heart of God.
---lisa on 5/6/08


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In the beginning of the grieving process, there is a mountain range of emotions but extended mourning can turn into a valley with no emotions or feelings.
Mourning can be a very lonely time.

But if you tap into the mind and heart of God, it can be a time where God will take you through the process of coming back to your real self...out of the valley and back to the mountain range where all of your emotions will return.
---lisa on 5/6/08


After mourning into dancing, joy for the spirit of heaviness.

If grieving goes beyond what's healthy, it can destroy you.

Three things to help you come out of the valley of despair and mourning.

Discipline
Repetition
Practice

Placing one foot forward, taking responsibilities back, practice - repetition, getting back into normal routines of everyday life.
---lisa on 5/6/08


God will bring you back to experience the range of emotions that all of us were created to have.

The grieving process can be an opportunity for God to help us reinvent ourselves. Cast off things we don't like and take back what we do, including all of our emotions. Without emotions, remaining in mourning, we will become too comfortable in the valley of depression that eventually destroys us and the gift of life that God gives us.
---lisa on 5/6/08


During the grieving process, let God put you back together. Bring you back to the full range of emotions that God wants you to have.

Beyond a year, grieving for years is not healthy for your well being.
---lisa on 5/6/08


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Simon, my heart goes out to you, I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers tonight.

God is perfect. We can't know what God knows. All of us will go through many trials in this life. I don't think there is anything more difficult than grieving over a child. Bless you dear one.
---deb on 5/5/08


For this, like for other things, I have waited in prayer for peace and how God would make me clear and give me what is helpful and beneficial. You can do this, too . . . see how God personally blesses you about your infant son dying. What He gives you will be special and encouraging (o: for being intimate with Him better than you can be in love with any human (o:
---Bill_bila5659 on 5/5/08


Yes, God does have His good purpose to go with any thing that happens. I won't say He didn't want to heal your son, but God is now doing all He pleases with him (o: So, we trust him to You, LORD our Father (o: One friend who has lost so much told me if she gave up on God she would have nothing. And He's the best of all we have (o: So, we should pay attention to Him, not take Him for granted.
---Bill_bila5659 on 5/5/08


I have been taught that we always should be ready to die, that anyone could die, at any time, so when I have someone special in my life, in prayer I may realize the person I'm so loving and praying for may have died > and am I ready to be good with God about this? to be thankful for how long He shared that person with me (o:

You are unique, and God is *personal* with you, having His very specific purpose with you, about this. No general ideas can tell you what He has for you to discover.
---Bill_bila5659 on 5/5/08


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God does want to heal. For his word says by his stripes we are already heal. However, God allows things to take place that we just dont understand. But, his will be done and just know that if we are in his will he has a greater plan. Amen
---bobba on 5/5/08


God is all knowing. He knows our beginning from the end.
Death in birth, while in surgery or any other way occurs for many reasons, but God is always in control.

We all experience loss. The greater purpose for those that remain behind is to stay close to God and let the love of God heal our hearts.
To become angry with God or blame Him is to lose the greater purpose and destroy our life, too.
---lisa on 5/5/08


Simon,I am so very sorry to hear you lost your infant son. My deepest compassion and sympathy goes out to you and your family.
Did you do what the word says to do in James Chapter 5? That's how my mother got healed. I called the Pastor of the church, he came out and anointed my mother and the prayer offered in faith healed her -over a gradual period of time. Infants and babies and children who die go directly to heaven and grow up in heaven. So you will see your son someday in heaven.
---donna8365 on 5/5/08


earthly life is temporal, but heavenly life is eternal.
---Eloy on 5/5/08


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Your son was spared the evils of this world.
---Eloy on 5/5/08


How sad. We are in the last days. We don't know how long any of us have left. God will take some people out before the Great Tribulation. You infant son is with God for eternity. If he had grown up, though you would have preferred it, naturally, you would not know how he would have turned out, how much suffering was in store for him. What fate awaited him. So God allowed one evil to prevent a worse evil. Your son will not know any fear or suffering.
---frances008 on 5/4/08


God allows tragedies to happen, but all evil comes from the devil. Please don't automatically say that God did it. However, if He did, it was to prevent something much worse. Thank God in all things. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.
---frances008 on 5/4/08


I am sure that your son had a very happy life. Not a worry in the world. No pain. Loving parents. A 100per cent happy life. Not many people can say that when they die. Please read the book of Job. God may be testing you. You will grow a lot spiritually if you let Him use this experience for the good of the family, local people and church. It is tough love. God would not allow it if it was meant to destroy you.
---frances008 on 5/4/08


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A great possiblity. Also, God is all knowing. Perhaps, He knew the life that was ahead for your son, may not had been a pretty life in today's world.>>>Your son is in heaven and your son is happier than any of us down here on this earth. Have a great life.
---catherine on 5/4/08


My wife & I use to teach prenatal classes as missionaries in Puerto Rico. One of our patients had a baby that died soon after birth. This Christian couple started a grieving group that grew to be one of the largest groups in Puerto Rico. They use it not only to help greiving parents but also to evangelize. They took what was tragic and used it for the Lord. While we don't alway understand why events like this happen, we do know He is in charge and knows the future.
---wivv on 5/4/08


Simon there's no way to know why God allows infant death, death was never his design.

The things we can count on is that the Father is a God of reason, that the cross of Christ will set all things new in the coming age, and that our God is a great benevolent redeemer with a love and design for every life he made.

I have a report you might want to review: peter5544 is my pen pal address on ChristiaNet, leave me your email so I can send it.
---pharisee on 5/4/08


We do not always know why things of this nature Happen,in the face of inadequate explaination we are bewildered lost seeking the all inquiring "WHY"But my dearestLady we have to TRUST in His will.He has a reason.Just be resigned to it as His earthly Mother once acclaimed "Be it done unto me according to your word."He will give you the graces to see you through this ordeal. We lost our first 60 years ago she was inconsoleable.Peace in His love which we share.
---Emcee on 5/4/08


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We do not always know why things of this nature Happen,in the face of inadequate explaination we are bewildered lost seeking the all inquiring "WHY"But my dearestLady we have to TRUST in His will.He has a reason.Just be resigned to it as His earthly Mother once acclaimed "Be it done unto me according to your word."He will give you the graces to see you through this ordeal. We lost our first 60 years ago she was inconsoleable.Peace in His love which we share.
---Emcee on 5/4/08


Simon,
The only one that knows is God, no one else knows the answer.If you believe God choose to take your loved one, you can rest assured you need to make it to heaven where we shall see our loved ones again but in the mean time he'll grant you his blessed peace just ask him faithfully, he'll do as you ask of him. My prayers are with you, love CarlaXXX
---Carla5754 on 5/4/08


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