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I Want My Joy Back

How do you get your Joy back? I know it's a fruit of the Holy Spirit and it has to be developed. But I lost it when my father died and I'm ready to have Joy Unspeakable like Peter said. How do I get it back?

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 ---donna8365 on 9/10/08
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Just keep praying and worship God And you will get it back THE LORD SAID ASK ANYTHING IN MY NAME BELIVING IT AND IT WILL BE DONE
---betty on 3/12/09


Not easy but time heals wounds,very well.I am having the same problem after losing my sweet,young son, after only 7 months now.
Let a little time go by, resolve in your heart to always remember your dad. Buy yourself a little locket, put his picture inside. Buy a ring with his initials engraved inside or a necklace to wear etc...whatever you choose. This will allow you not to feel as if you have forgotten him or given him up. But yet, you will, have him with you(via the locket,ring etc..) and in your heart,of course,always.Then resolve to move on with your life with the help of the Holy Spirit.
---Robyn on 3/9/09


Only speaking from personal experience, I've found when I do things for others, to serve them, to help people, that's when I feel a sense of reward greater than any Joy I can feel from work for my own rewards. I have been in the service of a community I live in for 6 years, writing grants, organizing greenhouse projects to grow tomatoes, potatoes, peppers, and bamboo for all my friends and neighbors, just things to help the community. Being a Born again Christian I have recently decided to offer something to my christian brethren to commemorate the day they gave there lives to Jesus and the service of others. Grab your Born again birth certificate at bornagainbirth
---Joseph on 3/6/09


I pray that you get your joy back. In the meantime, try to find people that are often not given kindness and respect in society (maybe the have mental or emotional problems, maybe they are ugly or overweight). Try being kind to them. Doing things for others, if you are able, is the road to having peace and joy.

May the grace of Jesus be with you,
Matt
---Matt on 1/6/09


lots of my family members have died over the years. but i've been comforted that they are in heaven.
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when i dont feel joy. i exercise joyfulness as an act of my will.
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just the other day i was singing that song from 1969 "oh happy day". i also look for other songs that i can sing to bring back the joy of my salvation.
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like any fruit of the spirit. you know its there. but the pump is alittle dry. so you gotta prime it before it comes gushing out.
---opalgal on 1/5/09




I lost my father in 2001.I miss him.but one day I know I will see him,and on that day the joy will be so great.dear,death is part of life,grieving is natural.but one day God himself will wipe away every tear.I look forward too my home in heaven,with my God,and know I will see all those who have gone ahead.
---tom2 on 1/4/09


Its a brave decision Donna to decide to be happy! However its one you and all of us have to make.
My own sweet Dad died in 1993, I still miss him and his advice and humor and unconditional love.

After 'wallowing' for a while I realized that its my choice to be miserable, or choose to be happy, I chose the latter!

My Mom died in 1986, only 69 years old.

I miss having them around to relive old times and listen to their stories, but we do survive!

I have 'adopted' a 'surrogate Dad' who is a treasure.
And of course I'll always have the Father, Son and Holy Spirit to guide me.
GRAB happiness before it passes you by!
God bless you!
---NVBarbara on 11/7/08


Sweetheart, your joy is not gone it is only covered up by emotional loss. As like a book's pages retrace your path over the past (since when?) until you have walked over it again. The memories may help. If you are lucky enough you will have known if/or what type of cologne (or other scent) your dad wore, get it and sprinkle some around yourself or space until you can smell it. This crazy method has done wonders for me since my own dad passed 10 yrs. ago. I advise this a lot for women since it was the best way to 'feel' someone close. Works for spouses who are gone out-of-town also. Pray for you this works.
---Pamela on 10/1/08


I've seen a lot of people make the quick evangelical decision for Jesus RIGHT NOW...but they don't persevere. ---katavasia on 9/23/08


I am in agreement with you on that one katavasia...many do make hasty decisions that are not authentic and they quickly fall away. That's why you should never force a person or pressure them to accept the Gospel...but be a witness to them daily, just walking the walk and being sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit. But on the other hand, for those others who accept hastily, praise the Lord for the ones who DO NOT fall away. Jesus said He would leave the 99 for the 1, so even if one or two out of maybe 100 we witness to do continue on in the faith...the Angels in heaven will still be rejoicing.
---Holly4jc on 9/24/08


""Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you, and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age. Amen.""

Making disciples is NOT the same thing as being a hit man for Jesus.

I've seen a lot of people make the quick evangelical decision for Jesus RIGHT NOW...but they don't persevere.
---katavasia on 9/23/08




Here's the Scriptural answer to your question: 1 Peter 1:3-9. We greatly rejoice in that we are kept by the power of God through faith unto the salvation ready to be revealed in the last time (this is speaking of the salvation of the soul, not the spirit). Then this passage of Scripture goes on to say, "Whom having not seen, ye love, in whom, though now ye see him not, yet BELIEVING, ye rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory: receiving the end of your faith, even the salvation of your soul." You have joy. Joy is in you. In His presence is fullness of joy and His presence is with us all the time because of Christ in us. Only believe and continue to believe.
---Linda_G. on 9/19/08


Donna...Are you doing better? We're praying for you sister!
---SusieB on 9/18/08


Donna trust that the Father knew his heart and that He knows yours. Trust that He inspired your faith filled declaration of His saving grace not only for the benefit of the cleaning lady who ask, but ultimately for the benefit of your dad. Your statement, quite possibly, instilled within him the peace he needed to accept his pending death as well as to embrace a confident assurance of his redemption. I have never met a Catholic that refused to acknowledge and confess Jesus as Lord, or one that does not believe that He is our risen Savior. I believe this is applicable to your dad, and that he has been redeemed. Allow for the Joy of knowing you were there for him when he may have needed you most.
---Josef on 9/18/08


Katavasia and what's the worst that could happen if you witness to someone and they are already saved and know the Lord? They'll probably laugh and then tell you that they too are a Christian. I've had that happen to me. Did you forget the "Great Commission" in Matt 28: 19-20?

Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you, and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age. Amen.
---Holly4jc on 9/17/08


katavasia....By your standards, we could not judge a false prophet. By God's standards, we can.
---SusieB on 9/17/08


Katavisia, Donna is still correct in doing her duty in preaching the gospel of Christ to whomever she feels needs the Lord. Actually her decision to preach the gospel to her dad, what you call judging, is really just using the discernment of the Spirit. And what you are saying about her, that is what you call judging, for your reasons are not intend to edify her but to judge her.
"Could it be, because she said her dad was a Catholic, worshipped idols and she believed he was not save? If that was the case then you did have a reason for judging her actions, but the wrong reason.
---MarkV. on 9/16/08


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""First, when we witness to someone it is because we feel in our heart that the person is not saved in the first place.""

Which is PRECISELY the judgement we are not supposed to make.

And I believe that even the OT says that the heart can be deceived.

I simply tell anybody who cares to hear what Christ has done for me, without judging his spiritual condition.
---katavasia on 9/16/08


Donna you are correct I believe for many reasons. First, when we witness to someone it is because we feel in our heart that the person is not saved in the first place. The saved don't need saving. We have seen their fruits through the years and can only judge by that whether to preach to them the gospel of Christ or not. It was you contention that he was an idol worshipper. And that his gospel had to be of works which never saves anyone. So your duty was to bring the gospel to him before he died so that he had a opportunity and so that you would never feel guilty you didn't do anything. I believe you were right in doing what you did, and of course no one knows who is truely saved, but its our duty to preach the gospel to those we think need it.
---MarkV. on 9/16/08


This is my commandment that ye love oneanother - that your "JOY" may be full!

Had the same problem....both parents...and my oldest son most recently this past March 22nd. It is a process to grow in! What joy last a day or few hours is not real joy.
But the Joy "He" speaks of is His Joy in us..... Jesus our Lord said (hint) to love oneanother - a lifestyle...not for just a day or few hours. Sorry, not trying to make this sound tuff or that I have arrived. Just sharing truth and fact with experience.
---Linda on 9/15/08


Katavasia....How about this one? "You will know them by their fruits." Righteousness does not produce good fruit. It produces rotten fruit.
---SusieB on 9/15/08


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""Katavasia....So if someone refuses or accepts the Lord on their death bed, we aren't to judge whether they are saved or not? If a person is openly worshipping a false idol, we can't judge whether that person is saved or not?""

In every Bible I have in every language, Matthew 7:1 "Judge not" has no exceptions.

Your copies, perhaps, may vary.
---katavasia on 9/15/08


Donna....Do you know the chorus, "The Joy of the Lord is my Strength?" If you do, sing it over and over and add another verse to it. After you sing "He gives me living water and I thirst no more," sing "Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha........" and so on. This will help you get your joy back. It will bring a smile to those around you as you sing it. God Bless You Sister. I'm praying for you.
---SusieB on 9/14/08


I woke one morning eight years after my brother died and got ready to meet him at a restaurant for lunch. Fortunately, after five minutes, I realized that the last time I saw my brother was at his funeral (otherwise I would've gone to a restaurant and gone insane).

I always thought I dealt well with my brother's death, but I didn't grieve properly (deep cry, very important for you).

Jesus did not leave the people of the Old Testament 'in the dust'. After the crucifixion, Jesus rescued many repentant prisoners ("host of captives") from the lower parts of the earth.

Ephesians 4:8
"he led a host of captives, and he gave gifts to men."

The Lord's COVENANT has changed, but HE HIMSELF did not.
---more_excellent_way on 9/15/08


Katavasia....So if someone refuses or accepts the Lord on their death bed, we aren't to judge whether they are saved or not? If a person is openly worshipping a false idol, we can't judge whether that person is saved or not?
---SusieB on 9/12/08


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**I am judging him, but if you read my other posts, you will be able to see that my heart is breaking because I do not know where he went.**

To claim to know someone else's eternal fate, for good or ill, is actually TO judge someone.
---katavasia on 9/12/08


katavasia okay so I phrased that incorrectly, my apologies. I didn't even realize I said it THAT way and you are right, it sounds like I am judging him, but if you read my other posts, you will be able to see that my heart is breaking because I do not know where he went.

Does this really sound like I'm judging my own father? Whom I loved dearly.

"I kind of believe he had a conversion of heart when that happened. Could it be that the Spirit of God used my words to penetrate his spirit and in his heart of hearts he repented then?"
---donna8365 on 9/12/08


""SusieB, no, he was Catholic and really didn't repent""

donna, this is PRECISELY what our Lord, God, and Savior Jesus Christ said, "Judge not" about.
---katavasia on 9/12/08


SusieB, no, he was Catholic and really didn't repent but in my heart of hearts I believe when he was in the hospital and the cleaning lady that came to his room, when she asked me what I was and I told her, "Born Again, Spirit-filled, blood bought, redeemed, justified, sanctified child of God." My father got real serious with me and the look on his face changed - I kind of believe he had a conversion of heart when that happened. Could it be that the Spirit of God used my words to penetrate his spirit and in his heart of hearts he repented then?
---donna8365 on 9/12/08


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donna, it took me well over a year to get over the death of my father. We were estranged for several years, but the last 2 decades of his life we became very close.

Give yourself time.

And when you pray, thank God for all that your father means to you.
---katavasia on 9/11/08


Donna....Was your father saved?
---SusieB on 9/11/08


I don't believe having the fruit of Joy is a feel good feeling. I believe Joy stablizes us and keeps us standing in Christ Jesus no matter what the circumstances are, but I'm afraid my circumstances of grief have overwhelmed me.

Just when I think my day is going to be filled with the Joy of the Lord, I think about my father and bingo I go down in the dumps again. I miss him dearly. He's been gone since February.

I have no emotional support from my sister or mother, they hated him and I have to listen to them bash him and just yesterday I cut them off. I can't hear that anymore. I know satan tries hard to steal our joy, peace, etc., and I'm afraid he may be winning with me. Please say a small prayer for me. Thank you.
---donna8365 on 9/11/08


When God gives me someone very special, I can first submit to Him so He has me loving that person the way He desires, and so I am loving ALL people the way He wants > "For if you love those who love you, what reward have you?" (in Matthew 5:46) And I prepare, right away, for how that person could die or leave our relationship beacuse of God's will. I submit to God to prepare me, like this...to be ready...not to make an idol of anyone. We can make idols of people, then suffer so much unnecessarily when things change. But there is grieving that is of God. And this in the Holy Spirit can be put aside while God has other relating for me to do. It is obedfient to the Holy Spirit.
---Bill_bila5659 on 9/11/08


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Abandon all hope of any righteousness of any kind on your part. Throw yourself completely on the mercies of the Lord Jesus Christ. I arrived at my joy and rest in Christ after having a prayer session while driving in my car. I told Jesus that his book the Bible clearly pointed out my sinfulness to me. I also said that his book spoke of a place of rest within him and I would like for him to scrub me and cleanse me with his blood and place me in a position of joy and rest. And that is exactly what he did. O thank you Jesus!!!
---mima on 9/11/08


It's only fair to yourself to take time to go through the grieving process. If you've finished that then how about just start praising him. Even if you don't really feel like it go ahead and do it. Out loud with enthusiasm. This works for me every time. I hope it works for you. I'm sure you will break into joy before too long. God bless you.
---john on 9/10/08


So you think that the joy of the Holy Spirit means being up on the Mount of Feelgood all the time?

In His agony in the Garden, Jesus said, "My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even unto death." Would you take His clearly not being on the Mount of Feelgood that Jesus lacked the spiritual fruit of joy?

You've not said how long ago your father died, but it's natural to grieve. And it takes different people different amount of time to do so.

The joy of the Holy Spirit is NOT a feeling. It's the result of faith--in this case CHOOSING to believe that God has everything under control, including this.
---katavasia on 9/10/08


To get your joy back, focus on God, and start to fall madly in-love with Him. He is the joy giver, and can give you joy when you spend intimate time with Him.
---Leslie on 9/10/08


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I understand your difficulty experiencing joy during a time of grieving. I have been there twice in the past two years.

First, you do what it says in Philippians 4, think on Jesus. Whatever is pure, etc. Mediatate on God's goodness and grace, and stay in God's Word. It will come back, in spite of your mourning. Make a gratitude list if you need to. That always helps me.

Hang in there.

Hugs,
Trish
---Trish9863 on 9/10/08


Donna...Was your joy in your father alone? Your father would not want you to be grieving like this. The fruit of the Holy Spirit comes from the Holy Spirit and is not something you develop. Keep in prayer and fasting to get closer to the Lord.
---SusieB on 9/10/08


You pray alot... and read Psalms 37 1-7....
---Lisa on 9/10/08


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