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Continually Fight With Husband

My husband and I fight all the time and we have been married only 1.5 years. What do we do?

Moderator - Get marriage counseling immediately.

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 ---Leesa on 4/9/09
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Both of you need to submit unto Christ and pray to receive the Holy Spirit. Keep praying for Him until He answers. The Holy Spirit can advise and give both of you peace. Make it a habit to go to church. Try to pray together each morning and night. Even if it's only a short prayer. Reading a Bible verse day and night is good help, too. It helps convict the conscience. You can't trust counselors, not even Christian ones. They will swallow gnats and strain at camels. I know what I'm talking about. They will tell you both that two wrongs don't make a right, but when they're through talking to you, you'll know they sided with one of you.
---Betty on 5/26/09


If you do this: 1Corinthians 11:3-10, 13, 15 & 16, 14:34 & 35, Ephesians 5:22-24, 33, Colossians 3:18, 1Timothy 2:11-14, Titus 2:5, 1Peter 3:1, 2, 5, 6, and he does this: 1Corinthians 7:33, Ephesians 5:25-29, 31, 33, Colossians 3:19, 1Peter 3:7 / 1Timothy 5:8, this resolves the situation. If you violate Genesis 3:16 (Gen4:7), and / or he violates 1John 4:12 then you have problems. If 'he or she' doesn't consider the other persons best interest, 'he or she' might easily be abusive, yet Proverbs 14:1.

p.s. (1) Most men don't like it when the wife discusses their problems with other people, but Galatians 6:1. (2) Submit to your husband. (3) Pray. (4) Be kind, Ephesians 4:32. (5) All, get saved and trust in Jesus Christ.
---Glenn on 4/25/09


You will get lost trying to evaluate the who which and whys so the bible does it for you:

2Ti 3:2
For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

2Ti 3:3
Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, 2Ti 3:4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God,

2Ti 3:5
Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.

You have a battle on your hands!
---Carla3939 on 4/24/09


Leesa...It would be helpful to know what you fight about and why.
---SusieB on 4/13/09


We wrestle not against flesh and blood (against each other) but against spirits and principalities.

Get to the root of WHY you are fighting. Is it over money? Is it distrust? Is it things he's doing to get on your nerves? Ask for Peace from God.

I definitely would seek counselling - I did when my marriage was going sour. Seek a Marriage Counsellor, not just a counsellor, but a marriage one. Go together if you can. We did all the time. I'm wondering what you're fighting about. Our marriage didn't go sour until my husband began to beat me up, told me I was not allowed to be a mother, that he couldn't love kids, etc., So my reasons were very serious. What are your reasons?
---donna8365 on 4/13/09




"My husband and I fight all the time and we have been married only 1.5 years. What do we do?"
It is for one, preferably both, to realize and recognize that an argument is always futile and prideful, for each of you will simply come out of it even more convinced that you are right, than before you entered into it.
It would do you both good to remember these verses, and to yield to the empowerment and guidance of the Holy Spirit, assuming you are both in Christ.
Eph 5:22,25 "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it." Love does no harm, mentally, physically or emotionally.
---joseph on 4/13/09


Have the both of you sit down and have a serious talk about arguments - how to have an argument and make up before you go to bed.

As worldly people, it's normal for the first couple of years because you are finetuning your relationship. This is the most difficult way because it breaks a person down mentally, physically, and spiritually.

As a christians, put God first, seek love second. Also, do an online KJV bible search for "one another," "each other," and "encourag." Living a christian life is a 24/7 lifestyle - not a once a week pep talk dished out by denominational "churches."

Read: James1:19-20, Prov10:12, Prov15:1
---Steveng on 4/9/09


Praying the both of you peace of mind, joy of spirit, good health, and many great friends to share them with in Jesus' name
---Steveng on 4/9/09


Maybe if you stopped fighting your husband might do the same.
---SusieB on 4/9/09


In most of the marriage counseling I've done, when you have two people fighting all the time, it's usually a matter of "one-up-manship" I would suggest you get marriage counseling - especially a counselor who also give personality profiles. (A good personality profile will tell you the best way to communicate with his personality and it will tell him the best way to communicate with your personality. If you apply what is learned, the effectiveness of your marriage will only improve.) In the meantime, evaluate your arguments and see if it's worth the damage to your marriage. But, don't forget to get some marriage counsling from a certified marriage counselor.
---wivv on 4/9/09




I'm sure most couples go through a season of this. We discovered that if we just discussed and didn't argue that it made a great difference. Arguinbg is when one or more poeple want to get their way. Discussing is when you have decided that you are only going to give your opinion and leave it at that. It takes a while to get used to this because you have to give in, but it works good.
---john on 4/9/09


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