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Living In Adultery For A Year

I have been living in adultery now almost a year. I want god to forgive me but I cannot find the strength on how to, I am no longer with my ex wife or kids, and live with the new women in my life, what should I do?

Moderator - Start by repenting IE by leaving the the relationship and going back to your family.

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 ---rolando on 7/15/09
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Repent first. Sometimes it can be harder to forgive ourselves. You must allow God to be God. He sees you in your situation and wants nothing more than for you to repent and return to Him. You must also leave that relationship. I know it is easier said than done, but it must be done to be in right fellowship with God.
---B.6468 on 10/10/09


Stephn, the visible church does not send anyone to Satan. Their job is to ex-communicate him for the sake of the the rest of the church. This ex-communication also has a purpose, the purpose is to bring conviction by the Holy Spirit to the person who is in sin committing adultery. If he doesn't repent and be right with God, he is not permitted to come back. This sin has major consequences and never the same consequence for another. Some even lose their own lives, a good example is the quarterback Steve Macnair. Though a kind person himself, his sin brought death not only to him but the girl. And misery and pain to his family and friends.
---MarkV. on 7/25/09


Mark V.

YES. I re-post your statement for emphasis.

>>>The only difference is they have faith in eternal security while the other believer doesn't. Nothing else is different. We all have the Spirit to convict us of sin. If there is no conviction of sins then there is no Spirit, if no Spirit no salvation<<<<

This issue keeps coming up as something that divides Christians. It shouldn't! I've blonged to both kind of churches. The difference is one of THEORY more than PRACTICE (Calvinism vs. Arminianism is a centuries-old question). Actually, many believers arrive at some sort of mixture of the two views!
---Donna66 on 7/24/09


Ignatius, genuine Christians all know when they sin they need to repent. It doesn't matter if they believe in eternal security or not. If anyone is preaching they don't have to, they are wrong, and I am sure there is many who are wrong as there is many who don't believe Salvation is all of the Lord. What I find is that those who oppose eternal security are the one's saying it. All who believe in eternal security and are genuine believers are the same as those who don't believe in eternal security. The only difference is they have faith in eternal security while the other believer doesn't. Nothing else is different. We all have the Spirit to convict us of sin. If there is no conviction of sins then there is no Spirit, if no Spirit no salvation.
---MarkV. on 7/24/09


Doesn't the church letters by Paul concerning the ongoing sexual relationship with a brother's father's wife tell all you need to know?

Clearly the church should hand the man over to Satan to be taught a lesson. If the lesson is NOT learned, then how can he be saved?
---stephen on 7/23/09




Ignatious--
I believe in eternal security...I do not believe that God takes back the gift he freely gives by Grace. (maybe I'm an extremist) but that does not mean I don't believe in repentance!

Those who DON'T believe in eternal security (OSAS, they call it) would make everyone think that we tell people "go ahead, do whatever you want, don't worry 'cause you're going to Heaven".

I only want to say I've NEVER heard any pastor or teacher, no matter how "extreme" tell anyone this. Christians who sin need to acknowledge their sin and repent...not to save their souls, but to return to the service of their Father.

Sorry, but we are so often fasely accused on these blogs, I wanted to correct the error.
---Donna66 on 7/23/09


Donna. "No need to give me names. I know many of those who teach and believe eternal security.
NOT ONE
would tell this man that he need not repent."

I am not saying you lying. But there exist different camps with OSAS theology. Many Prominent Protestant Preachers who believe in OSAS confess what I said previously. OSAS theology carries different definitions, depending on which camp you are in. There are moderate views and then they are extreme views on Eternal Security.

In IC.XC,
---Ignatius on 7/23/09


A further word to those who worry about "Christians" not repenting (Even while sinning, a CHRISTIAN knows the truth).... to those who seek to scare them with the thought of hell-fire....

As a parent, would you rather your child obey you out of fear of losing your love...or would you prefer that they obey you because they really want to please you?
Isn't God the BEST of Fathers?

To me, repentance doesn't mean much if it is motivated by fear. Even a dog may appear "repentant" when it fears it's master.

When a Christian repents it should be because he KNOWS God loves him and is deeply sorry for having been so unworthy. It should be seeking forgiveness with a determination to change ones ways.
---Donna66 on 7/23/09


---Ignatius on 7/21/09

No need to give me names. I know many of those who teach and believe eternal security.
NOT ONE
would tell this man that he need not repent.

If the man was a Christian, he is out of the will of God. He needs to REPENT so he can again have a loving, growing relationship with God and find the way out the mess he's in.

If he is not a Christian, he needs to recognize that he is sinning, that he has a sinful nature, and that only by REPENTING and believing in Christ's substitutionary death for HIM, can he have eternal life with God and turn his life around.

Just because Jesus died only ONCE for all sins, doesn't mean we should REPENT only once!
---Donna66 on 7/22/09


Donna: "Cluny --- those who believe in eternal security (OSAS to you) would urge this man to repent of his sin! What on earth do you expect they would say!"

Not really. Many who believe in the unorthodox doctrine of OSAS will tell you that the Christian here is still saved and he doesn't need to be worrying about confessing his sin because Jesus forgave his future sins on the cross (all anti-biblical). Others will say he wasn't save to begin with (anti-biblical as well) (it really depends which camp you in). You want me to list and give quotation of prominent Protestant preachers who believe in OSAS and the above?

In IC.XC,
---Ignatius on 7/21/09




Cluny --- those who believe in eternal security (OSAS to you) would urge this man to repent of his sin! What on earth do you expect they would say!

If the man is a Christian, their concern would be for his spiritual well-being and the well-being of his family.
If he is not... their first desire would be to lead him to Christ, that he might be saved and have eternal life. Then the concern would be the same as above.

This is a good illustration of the fact that Christianity is much more than just getting into heaven.
---Donna66 on 7/21/09


I wonder how the people who believe OSAS handle this issue?
---Cluny on 7/21/09


Perhaps you should take time to get away by yourself and look at your situation from a distance. What are you doing to your children? How must they feel? Do you still care about your ex-wife? And the woman you live with...aren't you preventing her from finding a man she can commit to in marriage and build a future with?

Repentance is more than regret.
You must see your sin and selfishness for what it is...what it does to others... and how it is viewed by God. It might help to speak to a Bible-believing pastor or counselor who doesn't know the people involved. They've seen others in your situation. If you can't bring yourself to do this, question whether you really want forgiveness or whether you want to live estranged from God.
---Donna66 on 7/17/09


Larry, I do have training in therapy, and I have been told I have the gift of mercy, and helps, so it fits with my social work degree.

God shows mercy to me constantly. Why should I do no less for someone else who struggles? Their sin may not be identical to my sin, but my sin helped put the nails in Jesus' hands just as quickly as their sin did.
---Trish9863 on 7/16/09


Trish must be a counselor because she is always simplistic, compassionate and reflects scriptural direction.
God seeks the contrite heart meaning the christian who is truly sorry may struggle but change. True contrition is followed by obediance.
Don't get discouraged if you stumble.
God bless.
---larry on 7/16/09


When you are truly ready to repent and let the Lord have your life, you will walk away from this new woman. It's too bad you don't care about your kids. They need their dad.
---SusieB on 7/16/09


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Leave the woman or women and get you a place of your own. Call on God for forgiveness & renew your vows to God.
---Betty on 7/16/09


Moderator is right, just face the already known facts, repent and then do what the Holy Spirt directs you to do.
The thing is, you really have to have ture repentance, not just a bunch of words, get real with God and He will forgive you, and then the Holy Spirit will lead you into the truth of Father's divine purpose for your life and your family's life.
Truth hurts, but is the best medicine for a messed up life. Healing comes when we get real.
---BRENDA on 7/16/09


God's forgiveness involves repentance and obedience on our parts. If you are a believer in Jesus Christ and have made the decision that you need His blood to redeem you, then you have taken the first step. The next step is to stop your sinful relationship, and go back to your wife.
---Trish9863 on 7/15/09


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