My Wife Pregnant By Other Guy
I am married for 14 months, she had a relationship with another guy. And now she is 9 weeks pregnant, with another mans child, I am not sure if I can raise another mans child, should I divorce, should I ask for an abortion, or should I take the challenge God has given me. I Love my wife and have forgiven her.
Moderator - Stay married and get immediate counseling.
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---Leon on 10/14/09
Helpful Blog Vote (5)
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My married sister-in-law had a child (her first) by another man and her husband knew of the affair and pregnancy and stayed with her. Hes a good CHristian man. It eats him alive though. They fight all the time about it and I really dont expect the marriage to last once the child is grown.
Its easier to forgive than forget. When the child is a constant reminder of what happened... wow thats tough. I really dont know. Youd be a better man than I am. I can tell you that much right now.
To me it would be like my wife having an affair, saying she was sorry, but wanting to keep the other man around as a friend huh? |
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---JackB on 11/21/09 |
Joseph raised a child that wasn't biologically his, loved him and even taught him his trade. By all accounts, they were a happy family.
Adoptive parents and those who marry spouses with children from previous relationships do it and bonds between parent and child are frequently as strong as those with biological connections.
I suspect biology is not your main issue, but how the pregnancy came about is. Don't worry, you're human and most would struggle as you are. It is admirable that you've attempted forgiveness, but sounds like it's not a completed job yet. Keep working on it prayerfully and seek wise counsel. If you both are willing, you can move beyond this and enjoy the blessing (child) that has come from this difficult trial. |
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---AlwaysOn on 10/25/09 |
" I am not sure if I can raise another mans child"
Then allow his dad to do so.
"should I divorce?"
You answered your own question with this statement.
"I Love my wife and have forgiven her."
"should I ask for an abortion" No.
"should I take the challenge God has given me?"
If you truly believe the Father gave you the challenge,
then trust that He will empower you to rise to that challenge. |
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---joseph on 10/25/09 |
How do you know she's pregnant by some other guy? If you have only been married for such a sort time, why is she seeing another man now? Reads like your problems are more serious than just the fact she got pregnant. Like the moderator suggest - you have to get marriage counseling. But, do so from a qualified marriage counslor who doesn't know either of you. |
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---wivv on 10/17/09 |
Betty ... You are right in all that things you say.
But Leon says: "I Love my wife and have forgiven her" so does not want to leave her.
Then there is the complication: "I am not sure if I can raise another man's child"
I hope Leon is able to take his last option & say: "I take the challenge God has given me" |
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---alan8566_of_uk on 10/17/09 |
She committed adultery, therefore you are entitled to leave her. Never try to convince anybody to get an abortion, it is murder. Whatever happens, remember it is not the child's fault. |
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---Betty on 10/16/09 |
Chances are she won't stay around, so your decision will be made for you.
However, if she does decide to stay, you deserve a lot of respect for being willing to see this through.
I was in the same situation and was also willing to stick it out to the bitter end. God had other plans and delivered me from that situation. |
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---ralph7477 on 10/14/09 |
leon
you already know the answer its a life not a choice. |
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---Psalm_51 on 10/14/09 |
"IF" you have forgiven your wife, then ask God to help you in this situation, and strengthen you in order to raise this child. Abortion should not even be considered, contrary to "public opinion" on the issue, it is still murder. Maybe you should ask God to forgive you for having considered that option? Divorce is not "necessarily" the right choice either, though it is an option should you feel uncertain about the issue of trust, God would prefer you both to work this out. |
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---tommy3007 on 10/14/09 |
What kind of man would KILL an unborn baby?? Maybe that baby is yours. Try DNA!!! |
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---KarenD on 10/14/09 |
how do you know the baby is not yours?
were separated while she was having this relationship
or were you withholding marital relations and unaware of the relationship until she became pregnant?
you have no right to ask your wife to abort and kill a life
you can't claim God has given you a "challenge" by snuffing out a life
if you love and have forgiven your wife then seek counseling from a qualified professional ...your contempt for the life she is carrying will poison this child as the child grows older and you will need to forgive the child as well |
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---Rhonda on 10/14/09 |
Why should you want to kill an innocent unborn baby because the mother is an adulteress, especially if you say you have forgiven her? |
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---Cluny on 10/14/09 |
"I Love my wife and have forgiven her."
If this statement is true you can pass the test! A knowledgeable person once said," wise is the man who knows his own father." Thereby indicating how mixed up things are here on this earth but rest assured God sees all and he will be with you. |
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---mima on 10/14/09 |
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