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Shoved By My Deacon

What do you do when a christian brother (deacon) shoves you and threatens you with physical harm. My husband/I went to our minister. He said would have to prove it!! My husband said we need the police..he is not a Christian man..??help please..We have gone there almost thirty years ..

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 ---betty on 12/23/09
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Sorry I would not let anyone shove me that way........First of all God does not like when people shove us around,and we as His Kids should not allow anyone to wipe their feet on us or shove us around.........how dare he shove anyone,and a woman to boot shame on him.But I sure would open my mouth to either the pastor and if nothing was done........

HONEY 911 works like a CHARM

Doesn't matter how many years you went to that church never let anyone put their hands on you and get away with it.
Gabby7687
---Gabby on 2/22/10


What would I do, what would I do? The shouts of deacon down, deacon down would be heard. The clown car would pull up, and a dozen deacons in funny costumes would pile out in order to drag off their semi-conscious brother. Applause would be heard as the next act came on.
Matthew 20:26-28, Acts 6:3, 1Timothy 3:8-13.
---Glenn on 2/18/10


I believe the following statement to be true. The closer you seek God the greater will be your alienation from the denominational churches. Whether that time comes after 30 years or 30 minutes!
---mima on 12/23/09

Nicely put....my life experience is what you wrote Mima. I'll never forget when I started learning things in scripture that are never....ever touched by denom's. Went to preachers first....knew these educated men of much study in scripture would connect the dots. HA. Did I ever get an awakening....to more scripture. They are in there, wolves,lazy and money grubbers. Yeah, I found a couple that are GOD's....a couple. Out of many.
Start a home gathering like my brother does for fulfilling the church function.
---Trav on 2/16/10


2 Cor 11:15 Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also be transformed as the ministers of righteousness, whose end shall be according to their works.

Better leave your church. In this world today... Tribulation is inside the churches because Satan Seat is there. His ministers became ministers of righteousness. How terrible.

Look at God's command. Rev. 18:4 and the punishment begins at his house.

1 Peter 4:17 For the time is come that judgment must begin at the house of God: and if it first begin at us, what shall the end be of them that obey not the gospel of God?



---rosalie on 1/31/10


What exactly is the police going to do arrest him? why? Turn the other cheek love It's bible advice, common knowledge to this day, what not good enough, what will the council of sinners do? it's a church matter doh! and if he does it again high tail out of there. SORTED.
---Carla on 1/30/10




Get the police! This so-called deacon is way out of line. So is the pastor! He(pastor) is suppose to know to handle problems of this sort,according to the Word of God. There are way too many of these type people(deacons and pastors) posing as leaders and preachers in the church. They need to be exposed and not ignored. There are many hurt and wounded people in church because of these type hypocrites and demons. A deacon should be protective of the women in church, more spiritual and loving.
---Robyn on 12/29/09


alan...You are so right. I think we should just stop posting comments on these kinds of questions if the poster is not willing to continue in the dialogue.
---KarenD on 12/28/09


The question is full of mystery!

Who was shoved, Betty or husband?

Both went to minister?

Who is not a Christian man ... husband, deacon, or minister?

Both Betty & husband have gone to that church for 30 years?

What led up to the alleged pushing & the threats?

Noted that Betty has left this blog ... I wonder how genuine her question was?
---alan8566_of_uk on 12/27/09


I agree. Get the police.
---amand6348 on 12/27/09


Since Betty is not part of this discussion, it appears as if she has moved on to another problem. By the way, it does seem odd that a pastor would not believe a woman who has gone to the same church for 30 years. That's why I say she is probably the problem.
---KarenD on 12/26/09




Bless you Linda. Beautifully stated, and exactly what I was attempting to convey.
---josef on 12/25/09


Linda<<<-----agrees with Josef. Don't let something someone did have so much power over you that you resist the spirit and give in to the flesh.
---Linda on 12/24/09


I agree with 1st_cliff..find out what is brothering this man, and see if you can help him..how long have you known him and does this action fit him? And pray for him.
---a_friend on 12/24/09


I expect that there is a much deeper problem between these three people than a shove and threat. It would be nice if "Betty" actually continued in this conversation. I figure if the pastor tells them to "prove it" that this is not the first time in those 30 years that Betty has had a problem in that church. Could it be that Betty is the problem?
---KarenD on 12/24/09


This person is NOT a Christian. Let the police get involved.
---Leslie on 12/24/09


sounds like a worldly attitude to me.why would he threaten you,or your husband?sounds like he,s the one with the bad attitude especially being a deacon,and personally I practice ignoring ignorant people.
---tom2 on 12/24/09


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"You have heard that it was said, 'An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. Not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you." Respond according to the principles of Jesus, resist the devil and He will flee, your fight is not against flesh and blood.
---josef on 12/24/09


\\ I believe the following statement to be true. The closer you seek God the greater will be your alienation from the denominational churches. Whether that time comes after 30 years or 30 minutes!
---mima on 12/23/09\\

There's no such thing as a non-denominational Church in Western Christianity. It might be a denomination of just one congregation--or person--but most will be found to fit quite nicely in the existing denominations.

There only one alternative--the PRE-denominational Church.
---Cluny on 12/24/09


I believe the following statement to be true. The closer you seek God the greater will be your alienation from the denominational churches. Whether that time comes after 30 years or 30 minutes!
---mima on 12/23/09

You have that right, mima! I couldn't have said it better myself.
---Gary on 12/23/09


In the first place, stop calling him a Christian brother. Most people in churches are not saved, my friend. The minister should question his own place in the Kingdom of God. Is he truly chosen or apponinted himself as a helper of God? Call the police.
---catherine on 12/23/09


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Before making a judgement one needs to know the reason for the "shove"!and threat.
---1st_cliff on 12/23/09


It sounds like to me the Pastor and Deacons are members of the "Good Ole Boys Club". They watch each others back. The Pastor is out of line he should have investigated what happened. By the Bible this is the correct process if husband a Christian Matthew 18: 15-17-if brother trepass tell him between the two of them,if he doesn't hear take two or three witnesses so every word can be established,if he still doesn't hear,tell the church,if refuses to hear church he becomes as a heathern and a publican to offended person. If your husband isn't Christian he isn't bound by the Laws of the New Testament,or the church,he is completely in his right to call the police when anyone threatens physical harm.
---Darlene_1 on 12/23/09


Cluny, neither God nor Jesus ever told us to allow a person to shove us and threaten us with physical harm. This isn't just a name calling thing, Shoving (which is making contact with a person) is illegal, it's called assault and battery charges.

We are called to forgive and turn the other cheek, but we are not called to accept a deacon shoving us around and threatening physical harm. What kind of a deacon does that?
They already went to their minister and all he did was say prove it. If their life is in danger by this treat by physical harm, why stay there? Don't you question the level of holiness this church upholds. The bible tells us "do not be quarrelsome." So he's breaking biblical commands right there.
---Donna on 12/23/09


This question describes a physical act of
shoveing. Yet most Shoveing is not physical but rather verbally or behaviorally none.

I believe the following statement to be true. The closer you seek God the greater will be your alienation from the denominational churches. Whether that time comes after 30 years or 30 minutes!
---mima on 12/23/09


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Betty ... who was pushed & shoved by the deacon? Was it you or your husband?
---alan8566_of_uk on 12/23/09


So, this one untowards act by a nasty person is enough to end a relationship of 30 years with your local church?

If what you're saying is true, to leave this church means the deacon will win.

To drag Strangers into the conversation, seems that Someone said something about "turning the other cheek," if memory serves.

Perhaps the thing to do is to follow Christ's command in the Gospel, and sit down and talk about this matter with the deacon, your husband, and one other person.

And there just might be something going on here that you don't know about.
---Cluny on 12/23/09


Did he do this in the sanctuary? You and your husband do not wait, but call the police and give a detailed report of the incident, and press charges against him for assault (physical shove) and his threat to do more harm. When the criminal is put in jail, it will be difficult for him to continue to assault others.
---Eloy on 12/23/09


with no more info than you've given, it would be hard to answer. Did you have any witness/es? If not, then it would be your word against his and not much chance of "prosecution" whether it happened or not. Was it provoked in any way? What could have prevented this from happening? This deacon was wrong to respond in this manner unless you had gotten aggressive with him and should have handled it differently, if possible.
---tommy3007 on 12/23/09


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I would leave that church. Any pastor who as this kind of a man as a deacon, I'd say something is wrong with the Pastor.

1 Timothy 3:8 says: Likewise must the deacons be grave, not doubletongued, not given to much wine, not greedy of filthy lucre, 9 Holding the mystery of the faith in a pure conscience. 10 And let these also first be proved, then let them use the office of a deacon, being found blameless.

...being found blameless and it sounds like your deason isn't blameless, therefore he shouldn't be in the office of a deacon, show this to your pastor. If there's no effort to resolve this, I would leave the church.
---Donna on 12/23/09


Betty...Ask your husband to show you the scripture which says a Christian should call the police when you have a problem with a brother or sister in the Lord. The Bible says your husband (not you) should have gone to the Deacon. If that didn't settle it, your husband (not you) should have a meeting with the pastor, the Deacon and himself. Please clarify your question. Is it your husband who is not a Christian or does your husband think the Deacon is not a Christian?
---KarenD on 12/23/09


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