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Acceptable To Spank Kids

I spank my little boy on his bare bottom when he's naughty. He's 7 now and I've spanked him since he was 3. Is this acceptable in this PC era?

Moderator - It totally depends on the child. Many young kids will only respond to a spanking while some children need other forms of discipline.

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 ---David on 5/16/10
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Proverbs 23:13_14 "Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.
Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell."

Ever hear the expression, "He got the hell beat out him"? That is what it means...

As stated, the purpose is correction:
1 Samuel 3:13 "For I have told him that I will judge his house for ever for the iniquity which he knoweth, because his sons made themselves vile, and he restrained them not."
---Nana on 4/4/12


Can someone please explain why the Bible talks about how "even if you beat him with the rod he will not die"? I'm 100% positive God does not advocate child abuse so what does this mean? Thanks.
---Mary on 4/2/12


another parent advice column for sexually perverted parents who love to abuse their children under guise of "discpline"

ever notice Holy Scripture does not mention degrading or humiliating children with NAKED spankings - JUDGEMENT for their perverted actions will happen at a later time by GOD

these warped ignorant parents are not here to talk about "disciplining their children" they are here to BOAST about how they humiliate and emotionally and sexually abuse their children KNOWING there is NOTHING anybody can do about it
---Rhonda on 4/1/12


I wish the zealots on either side would stay away from these discussions (fat chance, I know). A good, sound spanking on my bare bottom, on those few occasions as a boy when I clearly deserved it, would surely have helped in my learning the critical lesson of Actions & Consequences.

I see nothing at all wrong with a parent resorting to an over-the-knee, bare bottom spanking when the infrequent use of such a punishment will begin adjusting the naughty child's attitude even before the first smack has landed.
---Rennie on 3/30/12


Its for individual families to choose how to discipline their children and if spanking works for you then its fine by me. both my wife and i were spanked as children and we do spank our own children.
---adam on 3/11/11




in our family we are definate advocates of firm christian
---adam on 3/11/11


Robin-- You sound like a sensible loving mother. I remember spankings from by childhood (which didn't occur often) but they are not "bad" memories. My parents were sometimes angry, but never angry when they spanked me. I didn't understand, then, why my parents said "this hurts me more than it does you". But when I grew up, I understood. And I THANKED them caring enough to spank.
---Donna66 on 2/7/11


Michael-- I'm glad there are still places in the world where the "trendy liberal anti spanking rubbish" hasn't yet caught on. You are so, so right, that children need BOTH love and limits. Occasionally spanking is the best way.

Everyone of my genaration was raised by parents who approved of spanking (not beating). If the psychologists are right, there should have been an epidemic of serial killings the past 40 yrs in the USA...Or at least most senior citizens should have been too violent to contribute to society.
---Donna on 2/7/11


Has any one noticed that there are no Google ads on this topic. I would thing there would at least be an ad for an Attorney or a Bail Bondsman.

If you spank you children even in your home and a Teacher, Counselor, Social Worker, or Medical Practitioner becomes aware of it they legally have to report it it is not even an option. You will face criminal charges and you children will be put in state protective custody and you likely not get them back for a number of years if ever even if you beat the criminal charges. Corporal punishment is more dangerous to the applier then the child as a deterrent. Use an alternative means of discipline, it will keep you out of prison and your children in your family.
---Blogger9211 on 2/6/11


It is totally appropiate too spank our children on their bottoms.
I have had 6 kids youngest is 5 years and when he mibehaves ie disobediant he gets spanked over the knee on his bare bottom.
in my country it vertually illegal which the kids will pllay on and also the effects of trendy liberal anti spanking rubbish is felt worldwide ( read the papers-listen too the news.
Children need too feel loved and secure with bounderies.
---Michael on 2/5/11




well it depends you see your trying to make him recive a message but he does not seem to get it. so i think you need to have a talk with him. get things stright.
---Jordan on 2/4/11


the bible says foolishes bounds in the heart of a child but the rod will drive it out
---chivonis on 7/27/10


KEVIN -- I WASN'T going even write tha verse because I thought some might take it to extreme.SO I made Light of it , probably shouldn't have done that being GODS word.
---RICHARD on 7/26/10


Richard!!! 8^O

indeed scripture does state as You have written,however to many people confuse the 10 foot staff with the 10 inch rod,as the rod is small and used mostly for inspection, and the staff is big and used for beating wolves,lions,bears,etc....
---kevin5443 on 7/24/10


I will tell You what the BIBLE says,I don't think alot of people will like it.
PROVERBS 24:5 Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with a rod , he shall not die.
IN today world you be arrested and your child will get a lawyer, and maybe a book deal, for the story of his life.
---RICHARD on 7/22/10


I agree with moderator ! ! !
---fay on 6/5/10


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Never use a belt, Never, never, never, That is not sound advice.

If you have to resort to using a strap or belt you may as well go for a whip or why not the cat o nine tails PLEASE!

If by the time your child reaches seven and you have not got the message home without having to smacking then You need counselling Yourself. Self control and how to discipline your child effectively without child abuse.

to use a belt is abuse!!!!!
---Carla on 6/1/10


I think that you as a parent are doing very good job on your child.
I hope that when you started to spank your son when he was 3, you used just your hand.
Now, when he is 7 and he doesn't respect you, it is high time to use belt on him when he won't behave, until he will be 18 of age or he won't live with you.
It isn't necessary to spank him on his "bare", the belt will do a very good job on his pants. Just don't humilete him any more but tell him clear what he is allowed to do and not to do.
I hope that it will work good for him and for you.
---William on 5/30/10


always punish with taking away privileges first. If you need to make a point well recognised when all else fails smack the back of the child's hands. I used to smack my kids bum but I don't do that now I have the girls I smack their hands. It is not sadistic at all but it is a little outdated. but if it gets the right results you are the parent. But please never smack when angry or upset always explain when and why and only once.

If you make it a habit it will not work you'll just harden their habit to misbehave becos they know what's coming and get used to it.
---Carla on 5/28/10


If your stomach can stand it! Mine never could. I think it is sick to pull-down a child clothes for any reason.
---catherine on 5/25/10


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It seems to me that when you pull-down a child's under-ware, you are wanting to inflict pain. You know what this is? SADISTIC!
---catherine on 5/25/10


I spanked my boy,and it has made him a better boy.He is 13 now and loves the Lord.I know spanking is hard and you wish there was some other way to do it but it really is for the best.I was spanked as a child and I feel it made me a better person.Some one who knows how to control their feelings.It is important not to spank in anger. Get your self ondre control first. And tell them why they are being spanked and always remember to tell them you love them.
---Robin on 5/25/10


Cluny -- "Stoned teenagers" Ha! Yes, and all too often they don't succeed in avoiding the "stoning".
---Donna66 on 5/25/10


This has always been a tough question for me. I was slippered and cained and rulered and strapped and whatever other punishment you could imagine giving a child at school in the old days.

In its favour I guess I haven't grown up to be a bad person because of it, yet in many ways it gave me miserable memories of my childhood.

Maybe it depends on the individual child. If you have one that will listen to reason without chastisement, or will behave if grounded or having privileges withdrawn then fine. If not, I think it is better to give the odd slap when young if that is what it takes to stop them turning into teenage hoodlums latter.
---annie on 5/24/10


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...a rod [is] for the back of him that is void of understanding.

That's why "spanking" should be a last resort. If a child is too young to "understand" (or too stubborn to listen when older) and also doesn't understand that he must obey...then a spanking is in order. Of course, if the child is old enough for natural consequences to teach the lesson, barring serious injury, this is probably best of all.
---Donna66 on 5/22/10


2Sam 7:14b If he commit iniquity, I will chasten him with the rod of men, and with the stripes of the children of men:
Psa 89:32 Then will I visit their transgression with the rod, and their iniquity with stripes.
Pro 10:13 In the lips of him that hath understanding wisdom is found: but a rod [is] for the back of him that is void of understanding.
Pro 22:15 Foolishness [is] bound in the heart of a child, [but] the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
Pro 23:13-14 Withhold not correction from the child: for [if] thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.
Pro 26:3 A whip for the horse, a bridle for the ass, and a rod for the fool's back.
---micha9344 on 5/20/10


Cluny:

It's quite common these days to see stoned rebellious teenagers... ,)
---StrongAxe on 5/20/10


Cluny - 1st Proverbs does NOT speak on beating kids - that's child abuse which is WRONG in God's eyes. Proverbs speaks on disciplining (spanking) or correcting kids, which is GOOD in God's eyes - He does it to us spiritually, or we are NOT His according to the Bible. So Cluny if you disagree with Proverbs, you are saying that God is WRONG and you are RIGHT - in other words, you are in disobedience to God and argue with Him - is this correct? You are saying you are God - is this correct? This is at least what it sounds like to me.
---Leslie on 5/20/10


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Cluny - 1st Proverbs does NOT speak on beating kids - that's child abuse which is WRONG in God's eyes. Proverbs speaks on disciplining (spanking) or correcting kids, which is GOOD in God's eyes - He does it to us spiritually, or we are NOT His according to the Bible. So Cluny if you disagree with Proverbs, you are saying that God is WRONG and you are RIGHT - in other words, you are in disobedience to God and argue with Him - is this correct? You are saying you are God - is this correct? This is at least what it sounds like to me.
---Leslie on 5/20/10


Proverbs 23:13 Withhold not correction from the child: for [if] thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.
Proverbs 23:14 Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.
---francis on 5/20/10


2 Timothy 3:16 All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:

Proverbs 23:13 Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.

Proverbs 23:14 Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.
---francis on 5/20/10


I was spanked as a kid and grew up pretty well. I got married and we did not talk about it. I spanked our first boy and then we talked aboout it. my wife said. there are 100 ways to dicipline a child and you choose the one at the bottom of the list, that requires no thought. So, say he comes home from school in trouble, cuz he hit a kid, and we tell him its wrong by spanking him and hit him. I prayed about it. the word says, Whoever spares the rod spoils the child. What is the rod. a paddle or dicipline. it also says, The Lord is my shepherd. with his rod and staff he comforts me. that told me what to do. what does it say to you?
---Larry on 5/20/10


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I disagree that Proverbs talks about beating children.

In the Torah, the only punishment allowed, yea, commanded, for an unruly child is stoning him to death.

How many Christians here follow this commandment?
---Cluny on 5/20/10


Cluny:

The rod is an instrument of chastening and reproof, not torture
(Exodus 21:20, Proverbs 13:24, 20:30, 22:15, 23:13-14, 29:15)
However: Proverbs 20:30:
"The blueness of a wound cleanseth away evil: so do stripes the inward parts of the belly."
Proverbs 23:13-14:
"Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.
Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell."

Psalm 23 mentions both the rod (for chastening) and staff (for comforting), which go well hand in hand. These are also frequently used as archetypes for kings: rod/scepter of authority, and staff of compassion.
---StrongAxe on 5/20/10


\\Cluny:

For starters, how about:

Proverbs 13:24
"He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes."\\

Psalm 23 also says, "Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me," not "They beat me."

Furthermore, the word "chasten" means "to make pure," not "to use corporal punishment."
---Cluny on 5/19/10


The Bible says in Proverbs 13:24 that if you do not discipline (spank) your kids, you do not love them. The Bible also says that God loves us so much that He disciplines us (spanks us spiritually), and if we do not allow Him to, we become illagitamate (not His kids). This is how important it is to go with the Bible ONLY on this, and NOT with society.
---Leslie on 5/18/10


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A lot depends what state of the US you live in, you are potentially on very dangerous ground. You may find yourself subject to criminal prosecution, your children being removed and becoming wards of the state and you my or my not be able to get them back for may years and it will cost you a great deal in legal expenses. Do you really thing it is worth it?


I would find an alternative mode of discipline with all deliberate speed.
---Friendly_Blogger on 5/18/10


It is okay to spank your child if they need it and understand. I have a 11 yr old son that has ADHD and has asburgers. Which is a type of autism. He is so so so smart. It is hard 4 me 2 spank him. He knows when he has done wrong cause he admits it then explains in this long process of why he done what he done. By the time he is finished talking I forget why he got into trouble.
---Rebecca_d on 5/18/10


Cluny:

For starters, how about:

Proverbs 13:24
"He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes."
---StrongAxe on 5/18/10


David...In order to answer this question, we would need to know what it is that you think is "naughty" that would lead to you spanking a child with his private parts exposed. Is this child deaf and cannot hear your direction?
---KarenD on 5/17/10


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\\While it may not be acceptable in today's society, the Bible talks about how parents should spank their kids, if they truly love them\\

Please give book, chapter, and verse telling us this.
---Cluny on 5/17/10


While it may not be acceptable in today's society, the Bible talks about how parents should spank their kids, if they truly love them. Other wise it shows you do not love them, and don't care if they grow up undisciplined or not. Look at today's kids that grow up with no respect for adults, and are undisciplined even when they become adults themselves. This is because the parents try to be their friends rather than the parent. This prooves we should go with the Bible ONLY.
---Leslie on 5/17/10


There is a huge difference between "spanking" and "beating". Spanking leaves no scars or bruises or residual pain. It should include a calm explanation of the offense. Beating usually involves at least two out of three of these and in addition leaves deep fear or anger. Donna5535's post is a case in point.

I was spanked on rare occasions as a child (underwear on) and have been grateful to my parents my entire adult life.
---Donna66 on 5/17/10


David, my father beat me with a black strap on my BARE bottom and I have never fogotten those wounds. Been saved since 1983, I am 51 now, and in 2006 I tried to get an apology from my father for doing this to me. He never did apologize, but I forgave him anyway.

Your little boy will never forget those spankings, they are HARSH - bare bottom? Does God discipline us like that? Doesn't God discipline us in love? He has a way of humbling us without humiliating us, doesn't he?

I believe spanking bare bottom leaves scars on a child- I do not believe in it since it was done to me and did much damage to me as an adult. (major anger, raging anger problems that I had to be delivered from).
---Donna5535 on 5/17/10


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I believe that children should be discipline, and it depends on the circumstances on how you would punish your child. It's up to the parent to make that decision on spanking a child or not. Too me it's not up to society to dictate how you should raise your child. However, unless in exteme situations then further actions we need to be taken. Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6
---Kimbe7395 on 5/16/10


okay well you are his parent and has a parent you have to know if you are capable or have the right mindset to spank your child, when i say right mindset i mean, when you child do something that you dont approve of do you start spanking him immediately out of frustration or anger, or do you stop, make your child realize his behavior will not be tolerated and explain to him the consequence. so its all up to you
---victoria on 5/16/10


Bare Bottom ??

What are his underwear made of,Iron??
I feel it's degrading to pull a childs underwear down to spank them.......
How about time out,or better yet..DON"T ever discipline a child when your angry.......go cool off somewhere,then talk to them

Gabby7687
---Gabby on 5/16/10


In this politically correct world it is important to not hit the child in the face with the belt, since this will result in visible marks. Also broken bones are not good...
---Rigorous on 5/16/10


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