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Reaction To Pastor Betrayal

What do you do when your Pastor betrays you?

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 ---Jean on 12/8/10
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Just how did your pastor betray you?

If he revealed a pastoral confidence, that's one thing.

If he didn't keep a promise, that's another.

And if he just didn't do what you think he should have done, that's yet another.
---Cluny on 12/13/10


3. Let your pastor's tell the pastor's side of the story.
---aka on 12/12/10


You should do two things:

1. Find out why he betrayed you.

2. Find a new church or a new pastor to pastor your current church.
---wivv on 12/11/10


Jean,

How do we know this is true?

would Solomon have found the rightful mother if he only listened to one side?

then, how can we?

Seek the Lord and not sympathy and advice from total strangers.
---aka on 12/10/10


a valuable teacher that just got scared and wanted to save his own neck. I still love him as a brother.
---Frank on 12/10/10

I had the same feeling, or idea, when I've gotten in trouble with Pastors at some churches.

I wouldn't think that they would be "offended" at my suggestions on IMPROVING their churches, but they were.

I left the churches without telling anyone WHY. I didn't want to step on any more toes!
---Sag on 12/10/10




To start I want to say that every church I attended was a step towards where the Lord was leading me. Like line upon line, precept upon precept, etc...
In one church I had a vision the pastor would betray me. We were in his office at the time.
Later while visiting he betrayed me exactly as in the vision.
I knew my time was through there and it was time to leave.
I hold no hard feelings for the man as in his time he helped me greatly and I still consider him a valuable teacher that just got scared and wanted to save his own neck. I still love him as a brother.
Nobody needs know what it was about.
It was just my time to leave.
---Frank on 12/10/10


Betray-to be unfaithful in guarding, maintaining, or fulfilling: to betray a trust.
To reveal or disclose in violation of confidence: to betray a secret.
If either of these define your betrayal, then recognize your mistake, and try not to make the same mistake again.
"It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man. Do not put your trust in princes, Nor in a son of man, in whom there is no help. Thus says the LORD: "Cursed is the man who trusts in man And makes flesh his strength, Whose heart departs from the LORD". Psa 118:8>Psa 146:3>Jer 17:5
Yet this 'is' the bottom line "Take heed to yourself. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him." Luk 17:3
---Josef on 12/10/10


Bruce5656, you are absolutely correct in your answer. That goes for members of a local assembly as well.
---shira3877 on 12/9/10


i have learned if We just keep our nose's to our own ministrie's,when things like this happen We wont even notice,because Our eye's are not focused on the doings of mortals :)
---kevin5443 on 12/9/10


To be honest,
I feel sorry for you because the ones that should be lifting you up and bearing the infirmities of the weak are the ones crushing them but be under no illusion God help those who hurt Gods children and hold office or even call themselves saved in ministry, you cannot avenge those wrong doing's God Said let him. The fires hot!!!!
---Carla on 12/9/10




Get a Christian Pastor.
---Eloy on 12/8/10


In a case of Pastoral betrayal, my TRUST in those folks is often just shattered. Still, the Bible says that we MUST forgive them. If we want our OWN sins forgiven, then we need to forgive others of their sins.

Yet, where criminal activity is involved, I see no reason why there cannot be legal action as well.

It seems that some people seek to be Pastors just for that man-made title. Then the "truth" comes out. These phony Pastors just want to be involved with kids and "take advantage" of them.

I would NEVER be afraid to contact the police if I ever witness something of this sort happening.
---Sag on 12/8/10


a woman started to attend the church where I was going. after the sermon, we were standing by the table that had recording of past sermons (free). she asked me which cds would be best to make her husband change.

my church is pretty big on forgiveness, so i said any will do. as the weeks went by, she was constantly talking about her husband's betrayal. then, he started to attend also and did not say a word. it was not hard to see that she was actually betraying him when the truth came out.

search your own heart, before you seek the counsel of strangers or truth seekers.
---aka on 12/8/10


The Bible says to pray for your leaders and for those that hate you, curse you, or persecute you. Pray for that Pastor. That Pastor may not really be saved, because there WILL be some Pastors in Hell - so pray even for that Pastor's salvation. Word of Warning - do NOT pray for Pastor's harm, cursing, or vengence - this is NOT of God.
---Leslie on 12/8/10


There is a clear and specific instruction in the scripture for your situation.

Matthew 18:15-17, "Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican."
---Bruce5656 on 12/8/10


I told a pastor right in his face you put me in bondage, you put weight on my shoulder & you stumbled me.
---mike on 12/8/10


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Pray first and seek the Lord. Don't make hasty decisions or let this be the focus of your meditation. Let the Spirit of God comfort you and heal your heart. Be willing to accept your part, if any, and be willing to respond to the Spirit rather than react to the situation. Trust me. If you just follow the heart of God in this, you will come through it without the smell of smoke on you.
---Linda on 12/8/10


Why you challenge him to a steel cage match of course!

Honestly I'd try and see it another way, not just because of his office in the church, but because we often only se things our way and don't understand when someone is trying to help us.

Lets say for sake of argument you have been truly done wrong by this pastor, Jesus has simple instructions for this, it's summed up in a single word: FORGIVE
---Pharisee on 12/8/10


I've been in that position many times.

You forgive him and pray to God to forgive BOTH of you.

(I didn't say it was easy. Sometimes the only thing you can do at first is WANT to forgive.)
---Cluny on 12/8/10


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