Lonely Since Husband Died
My husband recently passed and I feel so lonesome. My church family has been great as hves my children, but I only feel like half of a whole. How long will this continue. My husband passed 2 months ago today, (Valentine's Day)
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---trudy on 2/14/11
Helpful Blog Vote (10)
Patricia, I am so sorry for your loss. You are probably having more trouble because you did CPR on him and couldn't help him. Your experience was not a very good one. You will never be able to fill the emptyness in your life, but remember, God gave you a longer time for a reason. Your time will come just as his did. I lost my wife almost 15 years ago. And everyone deals with their loss differently. I slept on the floor for almost two years. I went to visit her every day after work for a year an a half. I met many people there who lost a love one. Concentrate on God with your time. Meet friends who can encourage you not take you down with their own problems. I will be praying for you and Donna. Peace and blessings to all who lost a love one.
---Mark_V. on 8/2/13|
it has been 13 yrs...how does one take the emptiness away??
---donna on 8/1/13|
when I lost my husband my sister came to live with me. that turned out really really bad but she was with me 4 yrs. my point is I didn't have time to be lonely for very long. her and her dog would just sit in the same place all day. you would never understand how it was then. when she moved out, I got absorbed in making jewelry and my art. just no time to be real lonely. I'm just saying get absorbed in something constructive. you won't believe how that helps to help the lonliness.
---shira4368 on 7/17/13|
My husband of 40 years died last April of sudden cardiac arrest. The sheer panic I felt as I was giving him CPR before the paramedics arrived has yet to leave me. He was gone by the time they arrived. I am 59 years old and sometimes feel like my life is over. I am still so heart broken that some days I cannot even function. I now live in a tiny little apartment in a 55+ community and seclude myself quite a bit. I wish I had some good advice but obviously I am not doing well and have no answers. I have started to attend church again and that gives me some comfort. I cannot imagine living the rest of my life like this. I only hope that some day the pain and loneliness will get better.
---Patricia on 7/17/13|
sue, I will be glad to talk to you. I lost a daughter and husband 2 yrs apart. that was 5 years ago and it is still in the front of my thinking. the hurt has let up some but for me it took a while. mail me in christianet shira4368 and thru there I will give you my phone no.
---shira4368 on 4/13/13|
I lost my husband 2-24-13 and I am just lost would someone to talk to who is going through same thing.
---sue on 4/12/13|
Read Eccl the whole book. You are in a new season of life ch 3. Suggest finding a ministry or something to devote yourself to. You have been devoted to your husband now you need channel that energy into something else. sorry for your loss.
---Scott on 3/14/11|
Trudy, it has been over three years since my husband passed away. I still have a hole in my heart and my whole life. I could never dream I would miss him this much. We were married 50 years. God has sustained me in my lonliness and heartbreak and I know I will see him again.
---shira3877 on 2/26/11|
Trudy please accept my deepest sympathy for your loss. But do be encouraged. The pain gets duller and duller by the day but we never really forget our loved ones. I hope you have good memories of the times you and your husband shared. This is what memories are for. Times such as you are going through now. But do know, it is ok to cry and reminisce. It helps you heal and begin to live again. Take your time. Pray a lot and ask God to help you learn to live and love again. He will,you know. People mean well but only God can heal you and help you to be strong and well again.
---Robyn on 2/25/11|
May the good Lord our comforter console you and fill the void created for you by the transition of your late husband in Jesus' name.
---Adetunji on 2/21/11|
Hi, Trudy . . . Candice is saying how you have been committed to your husband and so it can be harder than a divorce in which you might have very much wanted to get away from him. Well, Trudy . . . you can be thanking God for how you had a man you appreciate. And you can now enjoy him and how he has been good for you. The love you have shared can continue, I believe, and be good for you (c:
I know a lady who was super angry at God about her husband dying. Now she is saying he was selfish to smoke so he died. She has grown and now uses her experience to help others. But she misses him and wishes people could feel for her and realize how it is to reach over, in the night, and he's not there. You can help us feel for others!
---Bill_willa6989 on 2/17/11|
trudy, I just want to add that there's a proverb that says, "We have a friend that sticks closer than a brother." And just this past year I got revelation knowledge on what that scripture REALLY means. I love Jesus with all of my heart and soul. But I couldn't figure out why at times I still felt lonely. Then the revelation came by the Spirit of God....He is with me ALL the time. By the Power of His Holy Spirit that dwells in me. Make Jesus your best friend and remember, "There's Joy in the Presence of the Lord, and at thy right hand are pleasures forever more."
---Donna5535 on 2/17/11|
Thank you all so much for the words of encouragement. They all helped me feel better. I will be attending a grief class sponsored by hospice, I am really looking forward to that. I think other than being lonely I needed the reaassurance that what I am feeling in "normal", and I thank you again for your words. This is the hardest thing I have ever done (not sure if the hard part is dealing with everything alone, or being alone and dealing with it) Not sure if that makes sense.
---trudy3834 on 2/16/11|
trudy, I am sooo very sorry for your loss. I know the deep pain you feel. When I was devasted, I cried every night and told the Lord how deeply I hurt. My prayer to God was, "Lord I hurt, I hurt so much Lord." And then I would ask the Lord to heal me.
This is the time for you to read the Gospel of John, especially Chapters 14, 15, 16 and 17. Take comfort in the fact that Jesus is your Husband and in Him you can have Peace and Joy. Make Jesus your life and ask Him to remove the pain from your heart. Grieving is a process. For some it takes years to grieve. Cry as much as you need to, get it out. I will be praying for you as my heart TRULY goes out to you.
---Donna5535 on 2/15/11|
give yourself time. It has only been 8 weeks (2months)since his passing. Maybe after a full year of mourning & putting your life back together then it will be a little easier. however being a widow is harder then being divorced or just single, because a widow or widower was commited to their spouse. Do not rush, just let the healing happen.
---candice on 2/15/11|
Trudy, so sorry for your loss. I felt just like you when I lost my wife of 35 years. I loved her so much. I would go to the cemetery everyday for a little over a year. I felt like I needed to be near her even though I knew she was not there. I met a man there who had been going there everyday for over 20 years. I didn't want to do that myself. I knew I would know the time when to stop going. I also met a lady who went to sleep on her daughters grave. She ask me if it was wrong. I told her everyone is different. It will take time, but you need to move forward for God has given you extra time He didn't give you husband. Use your time wisely, for family, and for Christ. He will strengthen you.
---Mark_V. on 2/15/11|
Of COURSE you feel like half of a whole. This is perfectly natural at this point.
it take about two years to emotionally recover from the loss of a spouse.
Give yourself time.
---Cluny on 2/15/11|
Let me tell you, that it is time for you to make Jesus Christ your husband. He will fill that void. God bless.
---Leslie on 2/15/11|
Trudy.........sorry for your loss hun,have never lost a spouse and i know you must feel lost but Jesus is here for you just let him wrap his arms around you and hold you, hope all gets better as time passes and it will.Here is a hug from a sister in Christ((((((((((((((((((trudy)))))))))))))))))))
---Lea on 2/14/11|
Trudy, if you and your husband are saved through faith in CHRIST, and CHRIST ALONE, please read what is written in 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18.
BE COMFORTED and REJOICE!
---Rob on 2/15/11|
I am so sorry you lost your husband. Of course you are lonely. The transition from marriage to single is painful. My husband moved out 10 years ago today.
God is faithful, and promises He will never leave you, nor forsake you. Trust Him, and make Him your love.
See if you can reach out to others at this difficult time, and get involved in a Ladies Bible Study, and see if you can minister to the younger women who are in need of a mature woman's guidance.
Don't deny your pain or loss. God will comfort you.
---Trish on 2/15/11|
Hi, you are not alone being lonely. I haven,t got a Valentine card yet and I am 39, plus I haven,t yet had a girlfriend, while everyone is married, now that is lonely, welcome the lonely planet.
---Richard on 2/14/11|