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Attracted To Older Men

Woman:25- Attracted to older men. Ages:16:35, 21:42,43, 22:42, 25:56. Found Jesus at 23.Concern:is this "wrong"?Care less for money - a man's brain is attractive. Don't have a problem, yet don't feel fully comfortable when going out & people stare w/thoughts of: date or father. What do I do?

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 ---Jenny on 3/21/11
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according to jewish tradition Boaz was 80 when he and ruth got together,she was 40,iam 61 seeing a woman 35,michael douglas is 25 years older than his wife,finally what people think about this issue matters not why? cause God cares not.
---tom2 on 5/1/11

It is absolutely NOT WRONG for a younger woman to be attracted to an older man, older men. A number of older men are likewise attracted to younger women. In GOD's Eyes, it's A-OK. Don't worry about the thoughts and "stares" of other people so much. As long as the two truly LOVE each other, then it matters nothing at all what others think. Period. It's the Love and the heart that counts. Most important that both partners are travelling on the same Narrow Path of GOD. Not to be "unequally yoked". GOD must always be First and Foremost.
---Gordon on 3/31/11

and what about being attrackted to obesque people ius that Horrible?
---andy3996 on 3/30/11

Well, either you give up feeling uncomfortable...or you give up older men.
You might look into yourself and see if you are, for some reason, missing a father.

Did you lose yours in childhood to death or divorce?
Was yours absent a lot of the time?
Did he show no interest in you or your activities?

Some times women just crave "fatherly" attention.
---Donna66 on 3/29/11

Most older men desire younger women. They disdain or overlook an older woman. They have myriad of reasons why they do this.
---Robyn on 3/28/11

Not always true. I am 52 this year and find myself infatuated with a 59-60 year old.

Of course, she looks better than a lot of 35 year old women thanks to a good complexion, lack of wrinkles, and a trim shapely physique. But her secret is that she is not a natural blonde.
---obewan on 3/28/11

are men's brains at 23 less attractive? certainly most at younger ages Don't have the money you don't seek anyway

there are men who marry at 18 and are emotionally mature to raise a family having children and making a good home for their wife and children

and their are men who are in their 30's and beyond who are not only emotionally immature they are also emotionally unavailable ..they like the "eye candy" and trophy status of the younger women YET have no feelings for them ...simply their latest toy

if you are unconfortable why not date younger men and see what it is like to be out and about without that stigma
---Rhonda on 3/28/11

Most older men desire younger women. They disdain or overlook an older woman. They have myriad of reasons why they do this.
---Robyn on 3/28/11

I like older men too, but that is because I'm their age. LOL

Seriously though, if you are not attracted to men closer to your age, you may be seeking a father figure. I had a friend who was 60 and married a woman who was 37. They seemed very much in love. Age didn't matter. They were divorced before four years passed.
---senior_citizen on 3/26/11

There is nothing wrong with being attracted to older men, IF it is done for the correct reason. A little introspection may be needed here, for example: am I attracted to older men because I'm looking for a "father image"? As far as what other people may think or say, just ignore them.
---wivv on 3/25/11

Robyn ... Thanks for the warning!

Perhaps that is why a lovely christian lady whom I adore does not want the relationship to develop.
---alan8566_of_uk on 3/24/11

You have choices to make in life. If you choose to date older men, that is your business. Marrying them is another animal. Don't! No good in the long run. Been there. Done that. Its fun and exciting in the beginning. But let quite a few years pass(within marriage) and you could regret it! I mean regret it! Will you still love him when his head go bald, his teeth fall out and other evils invade your relationship? You won't see these things until way-y-yy- down the road. Then it will be too late to switch horses. You just might get stuck. Your life. Your thing. You think people are looking and staring now. Wait about 20 years from now.
---Robyn on 3/24/11

Jenny: Look up to Jesus all the time, focus on God. Only check what you are doing that it is not contrary to God's instruction(s). You can never satisfy all human beings. Even If you date your age mate, not everyone that knows you will approve.
---Adetunji on 3/23/11

Jenny, the most important thing for you to be concerned about is if loves God with all his heart. Is he devoted to Him as his Saviour? This is the one sure way you can start a relationship with a considerate man who will respect you. If he doesn't fear or respect God, you will not have a good foundation to build anything else on. Find out if he goes to church, reads his Bible,prays... His relationship with God must be important to him before any other will be successful. That's my personal opinion.
---Reba on 3/22/11

Alan,It was not meant to be criticism, just struck my funny bone! cheers
---1st_cliff on 3/22/11

Cliff ... ooops My ancient old fingers went wrong! I meant 32.
---alan8566_of_uk on 3/22/11

well it's not normal in a way that it is generally accepted. but i know a couple where the husband is 40 and the wif at least 80 (noone really knows, but she's old) ackward yes to be critisized no. it is between you God and that man . only try NOT to ghhet a married or divorced man. that would be a great poain for you
---andy3996 on 3/22/11

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Alan **your figures are not clear**??
Well if you're dating some one 320 years your senior (or more?)I imagine that the date takes place in the cemetary ???
---1st_cliff on 3/22/11

Story about attraction. I worked with a lady 62-64 years old who'd been married three times. I traveled back and forth with her to work once a month. I was a riverboat captain. This woman had total strangers, sometimes very elderly men, but mostly men her age come up to her while we were eating dinner in a restaurant, while we were standing in line at the airport are at the rental car place, and asked her for a date. Now I'm 10 years younger than her and how they knew I wasn't her husband I will never know. Many of her friends said I wish men treated me like that. She once told me if she went out with any of these men they invariably ask her to marry them before the first date was over. She recently fell and died at 83 years of age.
---mima on 3/21/11

Jenny ... Your figures not clear!

You seem to have a history of dating men who were about 320 years older that you, or more.

Are you sure this is love? Maybe you are seeking a father figure?
---alan8566_of_uk on 3/21/11

What people think shouldn't have much to do with it. But does God want this? How does God feel? You can grow more in Jesus and then see how you are about this, but also how you will see many other things as you get more with Jesus. Do you have a church with mature Jesus people who help you? You might share about this with mature Christians who know you. Loving includes trusting one another by talking about these things. Why is he attracted you, when he could be sharing with a lady more his age, who is more mature in Jesus? "What is he really interested in?"
---Bill_willa6989 on 3/21/11

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Don't spend your life worrying about what others think. Its your business and no one else's.
---a_friend on 3/21/11

You can't base your life on what other people think, much less what you PERCEIVE other people think.

Remember that you don't mean as much to other people, especially strangers, as you think you do.

Could it be that you are projecting your own discomfort at being with older men onto others?
---Cluny on 3/21/11

-- Jenny :

Sister, It doesn't sound like the problem is with age but with you needing the approval of others, when it comes to your dating choices.

People will always have their own opinions and that's Ok..... but what you need to ask yourself is "How long are you going to allow the opinions of others to manipulate or disturb your peace."

BTW ~ At age 16(without your parents consent) it against the law for a 35 year old to be dating you. Other than that there's no law, man's or God's, which discriminates against the age difference of a couple.
---Shawn.M.T. on 3/21/11

If you're not comfortable dating this older man, then don't. If you are then go for it. I once dated a man 14 yrs older then me,but we only lasted 2months.I chose to stick within the 5yr span & my husband is only 4 yrs older then me, this works out better in my case, but you have to choose for yourself.
---candice on 3/21/11

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