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Woman Divorced Three Times

In a courtship with a woman who has been divorced 3x's. Is remarriage as the adulterer the unpardonable sin?

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 ---Joe on 4/9/11
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Tend to go with Karen, one of the last who text on here... I believe that myself,no one can past judgement & thanks to yes! jesus redemption I am here & able to say to the author of this blogg take it to Jesusopen up & be completely before Him.. fast n pray don't go into it just relying on your emotions be open & take time before the Lord n Let Him lead you. aloty of ministries now even give or recommend counseling session before they perform marriages.. depend on what state you are n... bless you! be attentive to His voice! put God first You cannot Fail! :)
---ELENA on 6/12/11

I would say it depends on the reason for her divorces.

The whole divorce remarriage thing is completely blown out of proportion now.

If a man "puts away" his wife and pursues a marriage with another he has committed adultery. The woman is not bound to him any more (according to Jesus Christ "death or fornication"!). Therefore she is not guilty for remarrying and the man who marries her is guiltless. This should be common sense given the words of Christ on the matter.

And if we really wanna get down to the nitty gritty... every man and every woman on the planet is an adulterer(ess). Jesus said if we even LOOK on someone to lust after them we have committed adultery. Who hasnt done that?
---Jasheradan on 6/12/11

This would be a good time for you to apply the, "Three Strike Rule." While the Bible is very clear you are not to marry a divorced woman, marrying her based on the track record you present, I'd "drop her like a hot potato." By the way, this is not the unpardonable sin, but a sin nevertheless
---wivv on 6/11/11

Divorce AND remarriage is a sin. Mark states this(10 v12) Wife threw me aside after 20 years as she was a demanding persistent errorist. She needed the trade-in version. Ironically instead of remarrying a smart, educated Christian as she claims to be she married a Wisconsin farmer 7 years older than her who makes 1/2 her medical field wages. Guy cannot program a VCR according to our son. She did not even inform her family or our 2 sons one living with her that she was remarrying. Ironically on Facebook she writes about the Buffet concert that I took her to as a birthday present AND THEN submits a photo of her and the farmer. You would figure that the church would question her but again she use to bully everyone including pastors.
---john8535 on 4/20/11

Please pray and seek direction on this matter from the Lord Himself. We human-beings know too little of the overall circumstances that resulted in her divorces. Remember the woman of Samaria (John:4) and the woman caught in adultery (John:8).
---Adetunji on 4/18/11

Unpardonable is against the Holy Spirit Adultery is against goint to Heaven. You choose which to do both is death!
---Carla on 4/13/11

lack of discernment and willingness to seek out scripture yourself, in itself, is never unpardonable unless one is stupid enough to deny the Holy Spirit.
---aka on 4/12/11

\\Everyone deserves to love and be loved in my opinion but some people think people that have been divorced are second class citizens and not worthy of happiness.\\

In my observation, when marriages break up it is very seldom one person's fault.

There is usually equal blame.

A woman who cannot choose the right husband THREE times clearly has something wrong with her judgement.
---Cluny on 4/11/11

It's not the unpardonable sin. But it would be very risky .It would help to know what went wrong with the previous marriages. Three divorces most likely establishes a pattern...chances are the same problem was the root of them all. You (and she) must understand why 3 marriages failed before and determine if it can be prevented.

If you are seriously thinking of marriage with her, take lots of time to get to know her and her behavior patterns before you commit yourself!
---Donna66. on 4/10/11

FOR YOUR SANITY, NEVER re-hash (re-tell) bad experiences, living them once is bad enough (FOR YOUR OWN SANITY, God removes all moral obligation to do so).
---more_excellent_way on 4/9/11

Thanks for the advice!
---Sag on 4/10/11

No, Sag, NEVER feel shame. You have survived human nature at it's worst. Now you can better understand the GODLY NATURE (if you stop the "shame" stuff).

2 Corinthians 12:9
"my power is made perfect in weakness".

Don't play the "woe is me" victim, "ENDURE".

Matthew 24:13
"he who endures to the end will be saved".

"I am who I am" (Exodus 3:14) taught me who I am and gave me IDENTITY. My mortal flesh has no past...and no future. I do not exist in time, but in eternity. Jesus ushered in the age of eternity. I have life eternal..."THE LIFE" (John 14:6).

It just takes a paradigm shift in thinking, Sag (the SPIRITUAL/DIVINE reference point).
---more_excellent_way on 4/9/11

Most people don't have the ability to understand (professionals only THINK they can, pity them, for they know not "life").

Children get their identity from a "set"/pair of parents. That "identity" starts to destabilize when the child sees the parents fight (the divorce is only the final nail in the coffin). Most children of divorce grow up with a "depression" (identity crisis) into adulthood, and even for life.

A 3 time divorcee has already proven herself,....and will destroy the husband's dream of fatherhood and THE CHILDREN.

Sag, FOR YOUR SANITY, NEVER re-hash (re-tell) bad experiences, living them once is bad enough (FOR YOUR OWN SANITY, God removes all moral obligation to do so).
---more_excellent_way on 4/9/11

Let your mistakes effect only you, but don't do it to the kids.
---more_excellent_way on 4/9/11

Thanks for sharing your story with us.

I find it "just believable" that some parents don't understand the ACTUAL hurt that their kids go through. A Divorce is BAD. Seeing parents go from "Love" to "Hate". Remarriage is even WORSE. Shattering any hope the kids have of Mom & Dad ever getting back together.

To add insult to injury, many people, and churches too, are reluctant to say anything or give any help. I've been guilty there.

My friends divorced after having 2 children and I just "kept silent".

Shame on me!
---Sag on 4/9/11

\\Technically, I should not exist,\\

What do you mean by "technically"?

God cleary has other ideas, because you DO exist.
---Cluny on 4/9/11

No, it is not the unpardonable sin. And God is a God of second, third, and fourth chances. There are a lot of judgmental people on here who seem to have little compassion and/or mercy.

What really is important is for you to seek God and ask him if this is the person he wants you to be with. If God wants you to be with this person then it will work.

A lot of people have been kicked around a lot in life and maybe this is the case. Everyone deserves to love and be loved in my opinion but some people think people that have been divorced are second class citizens and not worthy of happiness.

Seek God for your answers and confirmation regarding this person and don't listen to cold-hearted people.
---poopsey on 4/9/11

John 4....Read about a woman who had five husbands and who was living with a man who wasn't here husband. Jesus gave her living water. Jesus hasn't changed. I know several women and men who were unsaved and involved in serial marriages. They are all serving the Lord today and testifying of HIS redemption!
---KarenD on 4/9/11

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I agree ... It would be stupid
---alan8566_of_uk on 4/9/11

Yes you can be forgiven, but you "might" not be able to get rid of the consequences!!!

I mean, if she's the same person who has gotten herself into three divorces >
(1) Her ability to evaluate who to marry is still an issue.
(2) You can become how God can make you so you can get with a really Christian woman, but this takes investment of honesty, patience, trusting God to correct you, learning how to relate "without complaining and disputing" (in Philippians 2:14).
(3) She needs to get wise to the ways that got her into all that, so she does not continue those ways with you.
---Bill_willa6989 on 4/9/11

I grew up in a dysfunctional family and my parents divorced, but I knew before I was 8 they never should have married. Technically, I should not exist,....and my subconscious knew it (it kept this a secret from me, I didn't know why I couldn't fully relate to life, I simply grew up with 51 years of suicidal depression and NO IDENTITY as a SELF/PERSON). Living life was like watching a movie.

On my 51st thanksgiving, God said to me "Now tell me all the reasons that you're thankful that you were born" (I never did thank Him for that, I also could not find one reason to be thankful,...He just said that to let me know that "It's okay, it's okay").

Let your mistakes effect only you, but don't do it to the kids.
---more_excellent_way on 4/9/11

I think it would just be STUPID of you.
---Cluny on 4/9/11

Just a wee, little, bit HARSH there, but probably correct.

I feel bad for the people who have been hurt in these serial marriages. Especially, GOD.
---Sag on 4/9/11

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Mark 3:28-29, All sins shall be forgiven unto the sons of men, & blasphemies wherewith soever they shall blaspheme: But he that shall blaspheme against the Holy Ghost hath never forgiveness,but is in danger of eternal damnation.
---Reba on 4/9/11

Joe, if she didn't choose the right husband the first three times, where did you get the idea she'd have the right husband the FOURTH time?

Joe, if you married her, I don't think this would come up--or down--to the level of sin.

I think it would just be STUPID of you.
---Cluny on 4/9/11

No. Remarriage, and Adultery, are both forgivable sins.

The ONLY sin that cannot be forgiven is blasphemy against the Holy Spirit.

A remarriage is going to be very challenging. Good Luck!
---Sag on 4/9/11

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