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Blended Family Advice

Any blended family advice out their other than don't do it?

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 ---paul on 6/12/11
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Today, there are many examples like the following ones. Where Christians divorce their spouses, get married -- including their kids -- and claim that it is a marriage made in heaven. Really?

Vince Gill and Amy Grant.

Sandi Patti and Don Pesli.

While these worldly Divorces-and-Remarriages were LEGAL, that does NOT mean that they were:

EASY
GOOD for anyone involved -- Adults AND Children
PLEASING to GOD.

Biblical Advice: 1 Corinthians 10:23

I believe that GOD frowns upon what took place, but HE lets us decide what to do. Good or Bad. Also, only GOD totally understands all the circumstances that were involved.
---Sag on 6/19/11


It can work. How old are the kids involved? Are they your kids,family etc..?How is the relationship between you and your spouse? Are you and he married already?
You left out many details. Cannot give you a correct assessment without knowing some of the details.
I was part of a blended family. The kids were very young. Me and their dad were married. He handled the situation beautifully. We moved on from there. There were some problems but not many.Mostly from the ex. Me and father are still together. Kids are all grown up. It is a challenge though. GBU
---Robyn on 6/17/11


Augie

Glad you got that off your chest.

Paul
---paul on 6/15/11


I would think that anyone who has lost a spouse through either divorce, or death, would understand the complexity of new relationships.

However, it seems that many people either don't, or won't, face up to that.

I would say that all previous relationships, kids, sinful behaviors, etc. make a successful, new relationship much more complicated.

For one thing, I'm really turned off by women who seem to think that their kids are the best behaved in the world. Yet, I can quickly see how the lack, or total abscence, of discipline had made their kids into: wild, rebellious, disrepectful monsters. The loss of a parent hurts kid tremendously and it shows.

The kid's parents need to face reality, instead of just denying it.
---Augie on 6/15/11


I felt that I was almost Tricked into one of these families, without getting a fair chance to understand what I was getting myself into. I'm still working on getting over the fallout.

My advice to anyone -- Man or Woman -- thinking about forming a Blended Family is:

"EXPECT the UNEXPECTED. In EVERYTHING too."

I had a bad dating experience, but some Blended Families do work out.

Jesus Christ was part of a Blended Family. GOD was Jesus' real Father, and Mary was Jesus's real Mother. Joseph was Jesus' Step-Father.

The Brady Bunch and The Sound of Music had loving Step-Families. However, in real life, those families take A LOT more work!
---Sag on 6/14/11




Blended family advice: The 4 major problems to cause strife and divorce are: communication problems (or lack thereof), finances, sexual (affairs), and kids. The thing is that if there are any kids involved, know that his kids are now hers and her kids are now his - therefore both parties have responsibilities to discipline and back the other up on the discipline. Also both parties have a responsibility to love both sets of kids (his and hers) as their own.
---Leslie on 6/13/11


I think the main issue is if the person has changed from her ways that got her into a marriage that turned into a divorce. If her own ways are still messing, they can do the same thing in marriage with you. In case she hasn't really changed, why are you connecting with her? But if she has turned into a Christian example who is obviously helping you get more real with God and if she is helping her and your children to find their way with God . . . they might not be "blended" but one in Jesus with each other. I'd not do anything unless you have unity and peace, first.
---Bill_willa6989 on 6/13/11


kind of thinkn' come fr a blended fam..my "guess"... Yeah,most times pressure/stress gets hold on where logic has gone south & God's Loving way (wisdom) ... Needed now! instead of gettn upset maybe as a family you can sit down n go over slowly,giving what you believe the Lord leading you to say take time before God n maybe even ,you need to first ask God give You wisdom how to handle / and take it calmly, advice & your rules may go over better .......successfully n Jesus name!
---ELENA on 6/13/11


Do you suggest people not blend families? If so, why?
---Leon on 6/13/11


Make darn sure it's the right thing to get into, with eyes wide open long before the marriage. Make sure the kids have a good relationship with you. Trust me, I learned the hard way in my former marriage!
---Mary on 6/13/11




A blended family is one which is comprised of two different families being separated from their original origins and blending together to form a new union.

Much like The Brady Bunch, only realistically so.

Paul
---paul on 6/12/11


Define what you mean by "blended family" Paul.
---Leon on 6/12/11


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