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Husband Too Lazy To Work

Do you have to stay married to a man that is able to work but he refuses to. He thinks he is too good to work for 9.00 dollars per hour.

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 ---Pam on 7/29/11
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Pam: Do you work? Once, when my husband was suffering from depression and was not making a lot of money in his employment, I went and got two jobs to help pay the bills. Eventually, he did get a good job, and was able to earn more, but I did not stop working on making sure there was money coming in. I even worked at McDonalds one semester on order to help feed my family when I was on college.
---Trish9863 on 8/2/11


Paul i looked at some photos of pensylvania, BEAUTIFULL reminds me of some parts in France and Belgium.
---andy3996 on 8/1/11


Well. You will have to deal with this man. You chose him and now you are stuck with him.You do not have a good and godly reason to leave him. He is not committing adultery,abusing you.My condolences to you.
I cannot imagine why a man would make his family suffer this way. Why not take what he can, for now? Another door may open after a while. He needs wisdom and understanding badly.I feel for you. You have a sizeable problem to deal with. This will effect other areas of your life with this brute.
---Robyn on 8/1/11


Paul, I CORINTHIANS 7:12-16. In these Verses, Paul makes it clear that these are "his" words, not the LORD's. But, when you know that the whole Canonical Scriptures are GOD's Written Words, then, We can safely say that the LORD is speaking this, also. Because, GOD warns not to be unequally yoked. So, remembering that when regarding these Verses in I CORINTHIANS 7, the understanding is manifested. The perfect Truth IS is that GOD hates Divorce PERIOD. But, He also wants that His people marry in HIM, not according to their own fleshly lusts and desires. So, we're to marry in equal-yoking, and that, in HIM.
---Gordon on 8/1/11


Donna, life here is quite expensiveas i said an average teachers wage is about 166USD (high salary rate). a house (two rooms and a private toilet)55USD, electricity 22USD, heating water 9USD each. so 166 -95 = 71 dollars left for food dresses and transport. if the person has a wife and kids he uses about 3dollar a day = 90USD. allready theres a problem. ABANDON house to live in a shed we put our animals gaining 33USd 94USD THEY HAVE 3USD LEFT FOR DRESSESTRANSPORTANDCHURCH
but thats the good part of society, if i tell the truth you won't believeit
---andy3996 on 8/1/11




Paul, you are right, it is wonderful to talk with others from so many nations. It can have a great effect, bad and very good. We use to video conference Bible Studies with our brothers and sisters from Texas. Our Company had a very big Giant Screen. They would seat in a room and we could talk and see each other, pray for each other and help each other. We did this during our lunch period at work. There is a two hour difference so they took time off for us later. Our manager was Christian so he allowed us time together. Great experience. When my wife died, they were all praying for me.
---Mark_V. on 8/1/11


Pam, I will get in this one. Maybe he is too good to work for 9 dollars an hour. He must think he deserves more. but since their is nothing for him at his level, he has to take whatever he can get. Donna66 and others are right, 9 dollars an hour might not be good enough there but in other places it is alot. But that is no reason to divorce someone. Normally, divorce starts when one of the two has had enough from someone and just wants out. They find all kinds of reason to divorce and then ask others, hoping they say it is ok to only justfy their actions. If he was abusing you or your kids, I would say get out or kick him out.
---Mark_V. on 7/31/11


well i'm from Belgium originally, yet i serve the lord in Togo West-afrika 10 years allready.
---andy3996 on 7/31/11

That's what I love about the internet you can speak with brothers and sisters from all around God's Great World.

I know some are freaked out by it, but I'm not, I'm from central Virginia, or at least that's where I presently dwell.
---paul on 7/31/11


Andy3996--Yes, we need to be reminded, once in a while, that wages and living standards are not the same throughout the world. More important than how many "dollars" one gets paid, is what will that "dollar" buy where you live?
Even within the United States, there is a big difference from one part of the country to another. Someone who can live comfortably in one area, might not be able to afford both food and housing in another.

I'm sure the differences between the cost of living in Togo W. Africa and counties elsewhere in the world could be considerable.
---Donna66 on 7/31/11


You should switch husbands with the Hen that Blogged

"My husband works too much"

Then you see Blogs.."Will I ever find a husband" LOL!

Not sure if they want a husband, or just something they can Squawk about!
---John on 7/31/11




well i'm from Belgium originally, yet i serve the lord in Togo West-afrika 10 years allready.
---andy3996 on 7/31/11


Andy

Where are you from, just out of curiosity?

Paul
---paul on 7/30/11


$9.00 hour shouldn't be complained about. my husband works 6days a week at 7.25 an hour! He is looking for a second job & would take 9.00 hour fast! sheesh. As far as divorce, if he refuses to support his family in any way,yes you can, but first try counseling or seperation.
---Candice on 7/30/11


9 dollars an hour? he needs to work 3 hours to ghet an average african wage, 8 hours to ghet a state-payment, a week to ghet the salary of a captain in the army and a month to ghet half the wage of our president. (maybe westerners forgot true suffering)

---andy3996 on 7/30/11


"Do you have to stay married to a man that is able to work but he refuses to. He thinks he is too good to work for 9.00 dollars per hour."
Yes Pam, but you do not have to feed him. "if any would not work, neither should he eat." 2Th 3:10
---Josef on 7/30/11


Pam, Maybe you could separate from him, but, divorce him for that reason? The only Biblical reason(s) for Divorce are Adultery and for being "un-equally yoked",
---Gordon on 7/30/11

Gordon

I think I have over looked the divorce for being unequally yoked reason.
Could you provide scriptures to support that reason, Thanks

Paul
---paul on 7/30/11


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According to scripture, you can't divorce him, but you can refuse to let him eat your food.

2Thessalonians 3:10
"For even when we were with you, we used to give you this order: if anyone is not willing to work, then he is not to eat, either."
---James_L on 7/30/11


There may be something going on here that you don't know about, but yes, you have to stay married to him according to the Bible.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 7/30/11


refusing a $9/hour job? - what other circumstances usually low wages demand overtime, often forced 6-7 day work weeks and odd rotating shifts, and long hours - making him a prisoner to this unskilled often mindless job leaving no time availalbe to find a satisfing career

did he always have a job and was laid off ...did he walk away from his previous job or get fired

do you have children to support?

If your husband was always a provider I would seek counseling first

if he has unstability in the work-force or has become irresponsible and you are at your wits end than I would separate until he can demonstrate he is capable of financially contributing again
---Rhonda on 7/30/11


Pam:

If he thinks he's too good to get a "normal" 9-5 job paying "only" $9 an hour, does he at least try to contribute to the household in other ways, by doing yardwork, cooking, cleaning, etc.?

I've known couples where the wife works and the husband stays at home, but then he's the homemaker (which can be a full-time job in itself) and that works out well.

If the wife works 9-5 at a job, then has to come home and has to cook and clean on top of that while the husband just sits in front of the TV all day with chips and beer - that's NOT good.
---StrongAxe on 7/30/11


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Pam, Maybe you could separate from him, but, divorce him for that reason? The only Biblical reason(s) for Divorce are Adultery and for being "un-equally yoked", as in: if one is saved and the other not....if the unsaved WANTS to divorce because of the other one being saved. Otherwise, he has to start pulling his share of the load. He just has to "humble" himself to do what he has to as your husband. He (and you) promised to love and cherish one another in the marriage covenant, for better or FOR WORSE, and only at Death do you part.
---Gordon on 7/30/11


You had all power to choose, and you chose him.

You can try to convince him of the needs of the home but you got what you bargained for.

And unless you were forced into it you have no real right to complain.

Know those who you say I do to.

Good luck, be praying for you and him.

Paul
---paul on 7/29/11




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