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Want To Marry A Non Christian

I am a christian been believing God for a partner, recently I met a man who is not a christian staying with his girlfriend. He loves me n wants to marry me. How long should I wait for him cause I love him too and have a burden to pray for him to receive Christ on daily basis and I believe he is my husband.

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 ---ellen on 10/10/11
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Its wonderful that you are praying for him to receive Christ. Don't wait for him, trust God to give you a man who loves God, then he can truly love you. This man doesn't share your values and beliefs, it will become an issue later on if he does marry you. Some dear friends have a lot of tears to show for such a choice. BE NOT EQUALLY YOKED WITH AN UNBELIEVER.." is one of God's instructions. It pays to obey rather than sacrifice our happiness.
---adeba5968 on 10/21/11

Ellen, if you are a Christian as you say, you should not be meeting a guy who already lives with someone, and especially because he is not a Christian. Any time we disobey God, there is consequences to pay, some times those can be very harsh, other times, not bad. Everyone I know who needs a partner pray's for one. And many take the first person that they meet and believe that was the man God wanted them to have, but red flags should tell you he is not. His is not Christian, and he is already with someone else. I understand you want him real bad, but that is only a temptation. Don't go for it.
---Mark_V. on 10/15/11

Please dont go any further in this pursuit. Pray for the strength to be free from this temptation. If you force your desires and get this man , you will probably remember our words with self-loathing down the road. I talk to you as I would to my own daughter.
Be strong beloved
---Poppa_Bear on 10/14/11

I agree with another blogger here. You are either naive,gullible and definitely don't have the spirit of God in you. If you do have the holy spirit in you, you are not listening and not being led by Him(the Spirit). God will never send something to us that will be detrimental to us. If this man was your husband he would send a confirmation to you and the man would know it also. This man is using your desperation and naivete, to get his way with you. He feels you are another deadhead christian who does not know the bible or yourself. In your own blindness and weakness you are willing to settle for him! You are acting worse than an unsaved woman of God. Very desperate and a sad testimony to the truly saved women of the world.
---Robyn on 10/14/11

Hi, Ellen . . . it is clear you did not say you have dated him. Guys can lie about wanting to marry you, so they can use you. And if he's shacking, possibly he is not an honest person. It says, "the husband is head of the wife," in Ephesians 5:23, "as also Christ is head of the church". He is not your head, if he isn't a Christian. You need a man who is your example and who needs you because of how you help him, as his helpmate, to walk with God and love all people (Matthew 5:46).
---Bill_willa6989 on 10/14/11

I'd comment on this, but, TRISH tooks the words right out of my mouth.
---Gordon on 10/14/11

You didn't say you are dating him. A lot of guys tell women they want to marry them, so that the women will do what is immoral with them. He is not honest to be shacking with a woman. And using her is not loving her. Love will have him doing what is right.

It says, "the husband is head of the wife," in Ephesians 5:23, "as also Christ is head of the church". He is not your head, if he isn't a Christian. You need a man who is your example and who needs you because of how you help him, as his helpmate, to walk with God and love all people (Matthew 5:46).

Also, it says, "Obey those who rule over you," in Hebrews 13:17. So, you need to take this to mature Christian leaders you know you can trust.
---Bill_willa6989 on 10/14/11

Let's see if I have this right. You want to marry a guy who is living in sin with Girlfriend #1 and dating you. He is unsaved, and you are. He is cheating on #1 to date you, and you believe he is your husband. That feeling is your flesh, straight from the devil.

God has someone much better than an unsaved cheater.

If he is cheating on #1, he will definitely cheat on you too.

Dump him and seek the Lord for His Truth and Guidance.
---Trish on 10/11/11

ellen, when i was a very young man i had the same burden to pray for a girl like that, let me give you one piece of advice

it is your flesh, and you should control it.

Luke 9:23 And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.
---andy3996 on 10/11/11


If this man is staying with his girlfriend, yet saye he loves you, what makes you think he will change his nature by marrying you? If he is capable of dumping his current gilfriend and "trading up" to you, what makes you think he won't be willing to do the exact same thing to you when the next piece of eye candy comes along? And if and when it happens (because it probably WILL happen eventually), you won't be able to say "I couldn't see that coming" because you DID see it coming. Since the first moment you met him, you knew he was capable of being with one person, falling in love with somebody else, and then dumping his first love for his second.
---StrongAxe on 10/11/11

Don't try and fulfill your own prayer. If you have been praying for a partner, God will answer, but He will not send you a non-Christian. If he does become a Christian, you should wait at least 2 years before marrying him. Why? To make sure he has really become a Christian and not just going along with it because that is what you want.

2 Corinthians 6:14-15 (NASB77)
14 Do not be bound together with unbelievers, for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness?
---wivv on 10/10/11

I wasn't a Christian when my wife married me. We've been married 45 years. on 10/10/11

Think if this non-christian guy is God's best for you.In my opinion i don't think God will give you someone whom you don't share the same faith patient until God gives you the person which He think is best for you.You can continue to pray for the salvation of this is our christian duty to pray for everybody
---mj on 10/10/11

Ellen, don't worry about your writing ability. The vast majority of Christians who ever got married were illiterate, and that was no indication of their character. And I'll add that this website is perhaps one of the worst places you could come to seek personal advice. Go to someone trained and sympathetic. God bless you. on 10/10/11

ellen...You can pray for his salvation. But, don't go around telling people this man is your husband. It appears that you are either very young or very naive to believe that you should even consider a relationship with a non-Christian, particularly a man who is living in sin
---KarenD on 10/10/11

\\He loves me n wants to marry me.\\

BTW, if you think you're adult enough for marriage, start writing like an adult, and not in text.

If you write like a child, it means you're thinking like a child.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 10/10/11

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Ellen, are you kidding?? He is living with someone else and says he loves YOU.. And you believe him???

How long should you wait... uh...the moment you posted this blog, you should have dropped him like a hot potatoe.

If he is cheating on his girlfriend what makes you think he wont cheat on you.

Time to wake up, put on your big girl pants and move on.
---NurseRobert on 10/10/11

So he loves you and wants to marry you.

I'm sure he says that to his girl friend every night, too.

How many other women could he have repeated this?

Don't waste any more time or energy on him, expect to pray for his salvation, and keep looking.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 10/10/11

oh ellen you sound exactly like my frind Gail. RED FLAGS HERE ELLEN!!!!!!
1) He is Not a Christian, the bible says DO NOT BE unequally yoked together with unbelievers.
2) "staying with his girlfriend" - why would God show you a man who is with another woman, not saved and tell you "this is your husband, wait for him."

My friend did that and she ended up DEVASTATED, HURT, REJECTED and it took her 5 years to get over him. He ended up marrying the woman he was with.

FORGET HIM - LET HIM GO!!! He's not saved. Are you? Because if you are truly saved and LOVE Jesus, then you'd follow the Word of God- do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers, what do you have in commmon with them?
---anon on 10/10/11

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