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How To Pursue A Woman

I keep reading how guys are supposed to "pursue" a woman. What does this mean to you? Do I hunt, or do I rest in the LORD so a lady can rest with me . . . like Mary "sat at Jesus' feet and heard His word"? (Luke 10:39)

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 ---Bill_willa6989 on 10/17/11
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This man I had a regular conversation with which happens alot with me because I am confidant and talk made two moves that was witnessed by other people. He is the Praise God type if you know what I mean. I was really surprised at his actions. A long while later he communicated he got married. I really didn't care because if he was engaged or with this other woman when he made a fool out of himself for me that says very little about his wife and to me he is unstable. I see men go for beauty and money so much I just stay away from them. Oh and Praise God for sparing me the headache. I will keep my A+++ credit thank you.
---Mimi on 1/19/14

wow! hello,thought one of the best on here from Bro.Bill W. ..Let me add I believe if the gentleman present himself well, eh, pursue her, appreciate 'n a decent fashion.Seen 'n church(yrs.ago) Pastors announce "sis. k & bro.j. En pursuit of her affections/advise respectfully,others desist.. And later on they announce "K & J got married"... :)
---ELENA on 10/28/11

Bill-willa, you also had me confuse with your blog. Then I read what you wrote on 10/18/11 and when I heard what you meant, it only showed me why many believe Jesus was married to Mary Magdalene. That was the first thing I thought about, those people who say Jesus was physically married to Mary. I was hoping you were not one of them. Spiritually, He is married to all of us, but at least make a distinction so people can answer correctly.
When people read what you say, suggesting that Jesus was courting Mary as His wife, they say, "You see, I was right, Jesus was married while in the flesh." I know we are the Bride of Christ, but you should make that distiction so that others know what you are talking about.
---Mark_V. on 10/28/11

How could God "divorce" if He never got married? Possibly, by Jewish law, ---Bill_willa6989 on 10/25/11

GOD doesn't operate under "jewish law".
GOD makes law.
GOD didn't tentatively,hesitantly engage and break off Covenanting anwhere, anytime in scripture.
He knows the outcome before the intro. As posted and proven in multiples by all OT prophets.
Isaiah 62:4
Thou shalt no more be termed Forsaken, neither shall thy land any more be termed Desolate: but thou shalt be called Hephzibah, and thy land Beulah: for the LORD delighteth in thee, and thy land shall be married.
Jer 31:31(New Covenant)
Heb 8:8 (New Covenant)
---Trav on 10/26/11

How could God "divorce" if He never got married? Possibly, by Jewish law, if you were engaged, and you wanted to break the engagement, this was considered a "divorce".

Mary was called Joseph's "wife" while they were still "betrothed" (Matthew 1:18), which means engaged, I understand > Matthew 1:20. So, if an angel called her his wife while he was betrothed, possibly breaking up with her would be divorce, though they were not married.

By the way, engagement, as well as marriage, under Mosaic law, is protected by the death penalty > Deuteronomy 22:22-27. So, breaking an engagement may be considered a divorce.
---Bill_willa6989 on 10/25/11

God cannot divorce if He did not marry. Did the Lord pursue or was it arranged? or both?
---aka on 10/24/11

Man, i don't know what to call it. One look magnetic? He loved them. They loved him. We love him and them. He was the head. The protector. The deliverer, provider.
The divorce is tricky...ha.. there was no paperwork. (Maybe we're holding it) But, is is mentioned more than marriage. Like you say....divorce implies marriage.
Isaiah 50:1
Thus saith the LORD, Where is the bill of your mother's divorcement, whom I have put away? or which of my creditors is it to whom I have sold you? Behold, for your iniquities have ye sold yourselves, and for your transgressions is your mother put away.
And Jer 3:8.
---Trav on 10/25/11

//GOD took a wife. Rarely spoken of or addressed, on a Christian Blog? //

God cannot divorce if He did not marry. Did the Lord pursue or was it arranged? or both?
---aka on 10/24/11

Yes, interesting responses. :) on 10/18/11

GOD took a wife. Rarely spoken of or addressed, on a Christian Blog? Char being only searcher of.
Was GOD attracted?
Deut 10:15
Only the LORD had a delight in thy fathers to love them, he chose their seed after them, even you above all people, as it is this day.
Isaiah 62:4
Thou shalt no more be termed Forsaken, neither shall thy land any more be termed Desolate: but thou shalt be called Hephzibah, and thy land Beulah: for the LORD delighteth in thee, thy land shall be married.
Jer 3:14
Turn, O backsliding children, saith the LORD, for I am married unto you: I will take you one of a city, and two of a family, I will bring you to Zion:
---Trav on 10/24/11

I don't see anywhere in the bible where a man is to pursue a woman. A Christian man that is.

AMEN anon

communication is key as your post states ...curious how many have omitted this and then marry and wonder why their marriage is "drifting apart"

communication acceptance understanding appreciation some of the foundations and qualities for a lasting happy and fulfilling marriage

don't see how that happens through "pursuit" which seems more like a competitive end-result game then finding human being and a life long partner to share and grow with in life
---Rhonda on 10/20/11

Yes, we can see each of us is unique, and so we have unique answers. And even if someone is arguing wrong, someone can make important issues that we need to consider.

One person said we need balance. And I thought > balance can mean not to get distracted with pursuing, but do things in balance with everything that is good, pursuing by prayer, maybe. And pursuing can mean being a good example that attracts someone.

If I got serious about someone, I might ask her if she wants to be pursued (c: and how (c:
---Bill_willa6989 on 10/19/11

Yes, interesting responses. :) on 10/18/11

bill, Darlene gave some great pointers, all i would add to that is don't ghet a friendship to ghet a wife, let God take control, Isaac who had the best marriage of the archfathers never pursued a woman, evrything was guided by God.
---andy3996 on 10/18/11

Look Bill. I shudder when I read post like yours. God created you to be a hunter of women,food(work etc..) and whatever else you men pursue. You are suppose to dominate and subdue. To be the go getter. But in the right way. Not whorish, greedily or out of order. But what is becoming for a man of God. It is nothing wrong with wanting and desiring a female for company/marriage. If you are saved you should pursue,supposedly, saved women. Pray and make your request known unto God but do something to help your desires to come about,also.Be a focused, God-filled christian man with a mission(finding that woman) in mind(hunt). You have to position yourself to be blessed. Do your part and God will do His. Hope I have helped some.
---Robyn on 10/18/11

I don't see anywhere in the bible where a man is to pursue a woman. A Christian man that is.

God brought Eve to Adam.
Ruth met Boaz by divine appointment.
Rebecca was chosen for Isaac already ordained in heaven.

Is she wife material? and are you husband material? Once that is settled, when you meet a woman that you are interested in getting to know, approach her with gentle questions about herself. See if she asks you any about you.

A relationship grows, it doesn't just happen. Be yourself and look upon her heart, try not to look so much on the outward appearance. Does she love the Lord? You'll be able to tell after a few conversations with her. Is she someone you want to spend the rest of your life with?
---anon on 10/18/11

Before you pursue a woman, you should ask your self first, would she be someone that God would want me to be with? Are we a positive influence to each others life? To be able to answer this question, you should try to get to know the person first.

As you go through the "getting to know you stage," pray to God that He leads you to His perfect will.
---Evan on 10/18/11

(c: I meant for anyone to share how you find God wants a man to court. I did not mean to limit this to the two possibilities in the question. Darlene has given very nutritious practical and spiritual advice.

So, Andy . . . what do you mean by the "proper Biblical way", please?

My personal and growing understanding is I need to do what Jesus wants so I am a good example for a lady, so I can be her "head" like Jesus is the head of the church (Ephesians 5:23, 1 Peter 5:3). This example would include doing what God means by "rest in the LORD".

And, of course, Jesus is our Groom. So He was courting Mary, as her and our Groom.
---Bill_willa6989 on 10/18/11

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Your question is a bit confusing. What do you keep reading that tells you to "pursue" women? "Do I hunt", sounds a bit aggressive when speaking of it in regards to a lady. " in the Lord so the lady can rest with you", really strange wording in my opinion. Then using the example of Mary"sitting at the feet of Jesus & heard His word" sound like you want to be worshipped & in complete control of the woman you hunt down & capture.I don't know what it is you've been reading but I'm thinking you need to spend more time studying the Bible & learn what it really means "to rest in the Lord".
---Reba on 10/17/11

the best way to pursue a woman is in a blinded car, once you catch up with her drive her over and look in the rectroviseur, if she survives put it in reverse and hit her a second time.

if you think the answer is strange,look at the question, a man does not pursue a woman, neither is a woman supposed to sit at your feet like Mary (that was an expression meant to show she was learning, not that she was yearning for a relation). a man should court a woman in the proper biblical way, and then both start a joint fellowship towards God (100% succes guaranteed)
---andy3996 on 10/18/11

pursue I'll assume a mate for marriage?

a curious take on using two passages that have nothing to do with marriage and finding a mate

"rest in the LORD" is to rest on the Holy Sabbath - RESTING has nothing to do with marriage ...resting in Christ does not imply lazy carefree life with everything handed to you

Mary sitting at the feet of Christ to HEAR GODS TRUTH (aka the spoken WORD of Christ - you do understand Christ is THE WORD) - spiritual truth and the message of Gods Kingdom to come has nothing to do with marriage - Christ did not marry Mary

maybe your confusion in pursuing women is by using Holy Scripture in error?
---Rhonda on 10/17/11

Bill Willa there are simple ways to attract a woman so you can get to know her. Always be spotless clean and smelling nice,hair cut and shaved if thats your style when you're not working.Keep a smile on your face. Be a gentleman open doors,help ladies when they need a hand to arise,good manners. Talk more about the lady than yourself unless she asks. Ask her out perhaps to a church social first. Let God's light shine through you and show in gentleness,modesty,honesty,ability to commit. Most of all pray and ask God to bring you the right lady. Make yourself a pleasent Christian man to be with. Remember this it,isn't always the prettiest woman or most outgoing one who makes the best wife. Get friends to introduce you to ladies.
---Darlene_1 on 10/17/11

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Good question. Answers will be interesting! on 10/17/11

I find it ironic about this question. christianity says that it is a relationship but the question proves otherwise.
---mike on 10/17/11

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