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My Boyfriend Just Left Me

How do I move on after being with my bf for two years now all of a sudden he is engaged to a girl! I feel so lost so hurt so angry so betrayed because I love him so much and one day he just decides to walk out of my life into hers ! Help me please I feel like I'm losing my mind.

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 ---Kay on 1/26/12
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I'm on a pray team at church. A young lady came to us so distraught she could not even speak. While praying for her God put these words on my heart for her "Loneliness will lower your standards". God had a plan for her life without the boyfriend. So many times we view something as rejection, and the truth is God has stepped in and saved you from something, in order to give you something better. Stop looking behind you to the past, forgive him and tell God you are ready to trust him for your future. Never look for a treasure amoung the trash. Have a standard. What would it profit you to love so hard only not to be loved back in return. Ask God for the right gift of a husband and have some standards that you will not compromise.
---Cheryl_OBrien on 1/31/13


Kay: Pray to God/Jesus to console you & give you the strength to march forward in life.Know that God has better in His treasure for you.
---Adetunji on 1/31/13


Rejoice! Similarily, that is how the hymn "What a Friend We Have In Jesus" became written. The man was twice engaged and before he could marry, the women he was going to marry died. He then never married. But he did write the hymn "What a friend we have in Jesus". "It Is Well With My Soul" was written after a different man lost his wife and children in the Great Chicago fire.
---bike on 1/31/13


My dear sisters, just it is even at older age, men,women, friends, co - workers, even relatives will turn their back on you & go on with life as if you never exist in thier lives! You put God first, I realize it does not may be make sense right now. Throw it around in your mind and see if God will show you more than you imagine. I call it " house clean" The other person your. X boyfriend or other. That person comes along & so, now you realize how Probably they were just using you, most time that person really doesn't want to. R emgaged...Consider your self fortunate! If they can nor tell you tbe truth...pray open -up to God and think how he saved you, from anymore heart.God be with you, ELENA
---ELENA on 1/30/13


kay, at least you found out what kind of person he is. he could have waited til you had children then leave.
---shira4368 on 1/30/13




Kay, i am more in depressed than you, you have 2 years i have 7years and i feel like e.th is black around me, i feel like even that i pray God doesn not hear my prayer, but one thing i know in deep, that Gods has one plan and we should trust of him, it so hard to love someone and be betrayed like this, But i hope God will see which is wrong and which is right
---mira on 1/30/13


Kay, you are not losing your mind, you are losing your boyfriend. Betrayel is common among the world. Your love was not the one mentioned in Scripture ( 1 Cor. 13). True love suffers long, love does not envy, and most of all love does not seek its own.
Your love was seeking something from him. And that is what has upset you so much. You gave and expected him to give back that same love in return but he didn't.
There is a saying that says, "if you love him, let him go" if he loves you the same, he will come back."
If he doesn't come back, and you have true love for him, you will always wish him well in life.
---Mark_V. on 2/2/12


This guy might have left you but inside him he is full of guilt,another thing is that all this happened for a reason coz God wanted you to see the kind of guy you goin out with. i have been in a relationship for almost six years and the same thing happened to me a man i loved jst walked out of me without saying anythng and is now planning to marry this year. its tym you move own learn to forgive him for the pain he has caused you ,Cz the almighty Lord is watching and He's ready to help you start a fresh though tym wasted cz i know the right man will surely cam your way. have a blessed day dear and try to cheer up.
---Benedette on 2/2/12


Bill_willa6989:

Regardless of what the boyfriend thought of Kay, to be going out with her for several years, and then all of a sudden be engaged to someone else, with no warning or notice, is incredibly rude. And if he's engaged to someone else, did he just suddenly get engaged on a whim? If so, it's highly irresponsible. And if not, it means he must have been seeing the other woman behind Kay's back for quite a while now.

So, as this man is rude and inconsiderate, and either irresponsible or unfaithful, she's probably much better off without him!

I feel sorry for both his new fiancee, as he will likely show her just as much honor and integrity that he showed his previous girlfriend.
---StrongAxe on 2/1/12


Allow the woman some slack for compassion sake... Did I love my X-fiancee wife after I chucked him out for lying and cheating... at first I jolly well did not...

Do I love them now after learning to accept that evil is a natural thing for some people to adopt regardless of going to hell... Yes

we are all human and humans forget it takes YHWH through his son Christ and the ever teaching of his Holy spirit to move on...

We were and still are all sinners not everyone accepts this, it is just through grace, we learn to sin less!
---Carla on 2/1/12




Kay, there is a lot you have not told us. Are you and he Christians? You call her "a girl" instead of "a woman". In case this means you despise her when you may not even know her, your boyfriend could have found out how you are able to despise another person, instead of loving all people like Jesus wants us to do (Matthew 5:46). So, do you love her because you are a Christian? Are you praying for her? Is God and loving first, in this?

Also - - for marriage, we need to be "submitting to one another in the fear of God," (Ephesians 5:21) and be moral. So, were you relating like this with him? Without God's love and communication, things break. God bless you. Now you can learn to do better > Matthew 11:28-30.
---Bill_willa6989 on 2/1/12


do not make someone your priority when you are only an option in their life.
do not spend your time with the wrong person-its not worth it.be thankful you have escaped the trapped to be with him for the rest of your life.
look for someone deserving of your attention and your love.
---mj on 2/1/12


if i were you, i will think it over what i need in my life. i might need "not to be lost", "not to be hurt", "not to be so angry", "not to be betrayed". i might need that if i love sb. , then this person must be mine. so... this boyfriend caused all these problems. so... why not let him go?
and then, if i still feel being hurt, that might be my problem. that is to say, i am not free from the very beginning. i just hope this guy could set me free. i might not need the guy i love to be a free man. i just hope that i could be free. then... BIBLE.
sorry for my poor expression.
---dsda on 1/30/12


Kay: What if he had died, wouldn't you move on?
---Adetunji on 1/30/12


welcome to the real world, now these are the things no one tells you about, life without god is worthless but life with the lord means you have one thing more than the looser that left ETERNAL LIFE.

If you held onto faith, righteousness, love, peace, joy, temperance, long suffering.

Yes, to obtain these spiritual fruits long-suffering is part of salvation. It's not going to be eASY BUT remain faithful to god next time in all your ways acknowledge him and he will DIRECT your PATHS.
---Carla on 1/29/12


Reminds me of an associate I worked with. She was a very attractive and young lady who flew all the way to Hawaii to marry her boyfriend. After arriving there, he told her to get back on the plane and go home.

These kinds of things happen all the time, however, one needs to be careful and keep up a good communication line with the Lord as He certainly will guide one in these kind of things.

Make the Lord the foremost love in your life.
---lee1538 on 1/27/12


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Cut him off as a complete stranger whom is nothing but a user and worker of destruction. And draw closer to Jesus and ask him for his love and healing. You will find as you go through this life that there are many pretentious people whom pretend to be your friend and whom pretend to like and love you, when in truth they are 100% selfish and there is zero room in their life for any other person then them self. He may use the girl he latched onto also, or else the girl may also be a user and he may find himself being deceived and used by the her.
---Eloy on 1/27/12


you are loosing your mind because you are obsessed

obsession is idolatry the man you called your boyfriend is simply human and chose to be with the women he loves by asking her to marry him

what was it about your "relationship" that had you so disillusioned YOU thought MORE about this man than he did you

it appears (as with many women today) you were living in YOUR HEAD about what YOU wanted from this man while this man was out LIVING HIS LIFE AND finding the women of his dreams

move on get involved in LIFE and meet single men who you can develop a REAL relationship with where open communication is the base
---Rhonda on 1/27/12


Kay, fall in love with Jesus. I was where you are now and I chose Jesus and once I began to pray and tell Jesus I wanted to fall in love with Him and make him my Everything, He began to reveal Himself to me.
Today, 28 years later, I am passionately in love with Jesus so much so that people say to me, "I don't understand your obsession with Him." He will Love you and do things for you and you will be in a very close relatinship with Him.

Buy the book, "Hinds Feet on High Places." You can order it through CBD (Christian Book Distributors). It's inexpensive and you will read it in three or four nights. I've read it about 8 times now and still want to read it again. ((huggss)) I am praying for you.
---Donna5535 on 1/27/12


Maybe he only considered you his BF and that's all. Did he ever know you love him? The best thing you can do now is to ask him if he ever considered you as his wife and if "no", why not? Maybe he never thought you would be interested in him. (You have nothing to lose by using the direct approach - especially if he is your BF.
---wivv on 1/26/12


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Well, Kay, I don't know what you and he did in your relationship. It looks like he did not communicate with you. If you weren't communicating and trusting each other with the truth about yourselves, what were you two busy doing?

Did you trust him with the truth about yourself? Or did you hide things? Were you hiding things from other people? If you and he had the character to hide things from others, also he had the character to hide things from you. And his "fiance" could indeed be "the one" - - the one who will be finding out how he can do this with her, too. But you need to identify and stop doing whatever could have you involved with someone like him. Arguing, immorality, jealousy can have us with the wrong people.
---Bill_willa6989 on 1/26/12


I understand your hurt and feeling of betrayal. My husband left me after 25 years of marriage.

What helped me heal was to get involved in a Ladies Bible Study and dig into the Word with other Sisters. Also, find a mature Christian woman to disciple you, and encourage you as you become a mature Christian woman.
---Trish on 1/26/12


First, off, he didn't leave you suddenly.

Obviously, he had been thinking about breaking up with you for some time before he actually did.

Second: This might not help you right now, but better a boyfriend of two years leave you than a husband of two years.

Did you think you'd be able to suddenly turn off your feelings, in any case?

Give yourself time to grieve over your loss.

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 1/26/12


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