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Not To Be My Husband

I have been asking God for a while now if my boyfriend is my future husband and he never answered me , so now it is a year and seven months later , I love him more than ever, I want him to be the man that I marry so bad and now God tells me he's not my husband. What do I do?

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 ---Joni on 1/30/12
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Choose life, obey God rather than self.
---sue589634 on 2/7/12


beautiful sister in the trenches of spiritual warfare first and foremost be sure to arm yourself with the full armor of God so you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil read Ephesians ch. 6 and apply it to your life. Also keep in mind the enemy does not come except to kill, steal, and destroy. I beseech you by the mercies of God do not marry this man, I recently went through a similar situation and came through it victoriously. you know the Lord thats why you know in your washed, sanctified, covered by the blood of the Lamb self that God does not want this man to be your husband. I know its difficult, I know it hurts, I know theres crazy temptaion, I know there are lonely moments.
---vlm1984 on 2/4/12


So, Joni, you've been asking all this time. I'd say it is good, when you ask God, to wait until you get a sure answer . . . before you get too involved. This, of course, would be a good idea about a year and six months ago, before getting so in love with him.

Have you read how Jacob did not love Leah, but he wanted Rachel? But because he did not love Leah, God would not let Rachel get pregnant! (Genesis 29:30-32) So, God wanted love, not just Jacob's preference. In God's love, we get God's guiding . . . "continually" (Isaiah 58:11), "and you will find rest for your souls." (in Matthew 11:29)

Donna (c: There's something you yourself might want to "attack", in your 1/31/12 post . . . take a look (c:
---Bill_willa6989 on 2/4/12


//Maybe we can help them learn that how they are "coming across" is rather harsh, etc.// sag

i know another that came across rather harsh. but, offended as they were, that wasn't the ultimate reason why they nailed the Truth to the cross.

if one wants to present a doctrine and use scripture to support, that person better be ready to discuss that idea. if it can be supported, their would be no reason to be offended or ticked off.

isn't it better for the offended if they are challenged now rather than being surprised when they meet their maker?

correctness and tolerance lead to death.
---aka on 2/4/12


aka, there you go again attacking MY responses. That's why I left this board the last time and I'm going AGAIN.
---Donna5535 on 2/3/12

I think that we ALL experience times like this.

Wherever there are other people: Church, Work, Socials, etc.

Intentional or Not, we sometimes "offend", or "tick off", others. When that happens, there needs to be Forgiveness, maybe Apologies too.

Yet, we need to recognize that our own input is important to GOD, and building up others too.

Maybe we can help them learn that how they are "coming across" is rather harsh, etc.

Please don't leave just because of a personality clash or something minor.
---Sag on 2/3/12




donna5535,i have nothing against you personally. it was me who encouraged you to speak what is on your mind. it just so happens that scripture (in totality) does not support with what others have taught you.
this is a forum of expressing what we understand of scripture. some say their knowledge is Spirit inspired, so it cannot be challenged. there are certain doctrines that i challenge vigorously, there are some that i do not. make up a new name, and you will get the same result. if you know that you have the truth, then why run? i cannot stand up to sound scripture. btw, don't feel so picked on. we are all game here. perhaps, while you are gone, you can compare what is written in the books that you buy and the bible. it might help.
---aka on 2/3/12


aka, there you go again attacking MY responses. That's why I left this board the last time and I'm going AGAIN.

I'm sorry if you are so carnally minded that you can't "see" the Spiritual meaning of this scripture. And I'm sorry if God didn't speak gently to you what He did to me. And I'm also sorry that you feel this need to CONTINUE to attack my responses.

What is the bone of contention you have towards me?

Please forgive me for whatever it is that you're holding against me. I forgive you aka.

Moderators, please let this post. Thank you very much. I won't post anymore since my responses are so "off the wall" according to aka.
---Donna5535 on 2/3/12


If you are certain that God is telling you to leave, then leave. Have you asked anyone for advice, (your pastor's wife - for example)? You need to be sure God is the one telling you to leave.
---wivv on 2/1/12


Joni, if he's a man fit for marriage, you can trust him by talking with him about this, and with your pastor, if he is approved and trusted by God who would expect you to trust him, too.

Of course, we understand that Jesus is our Groom, and we men and women in Jesus are His one Bride church, "in one body" (Colossians 3:15), "For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones." (Ephesians 5:30)

And in our relating and sharing with our Groom in His love (Romans 5:5) we have better intimacy than humans have had in their marriages! So, make sure you have this first, so if you get married it will be in God's love.
---Bill_willa6989 on 2/1/12


Joni, you said,

"I want him to be the man that I marry so bad and now God tells me he's not my husband."

Are you not suppose to listen to God? Is that not what you did when you were saved, commit your life to Christ? Why do you not understand what to do? There is nothing wrong in loving him, just don't marry him. It is pretty simple unless you want to disobey God. In the end it will be your choice, and you will suffer the consequences if you disobey. Some times they are not very hard, but other times they are very terrible consequences.
---Mark_V. on 2/1/12




Isa 54:5 For your Maker is your husband, the LORD of hosts is his name, and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer, the God of the whole earth he is called.

the Lord was talking to Israel....one land. if Jesus married every woman alive, doesn't that make him a polygamist? what about men? do u mean to say that this applies to woman and not Israel and no men? (i bet that author sells a lot of books...to women.)
---aka on 1/31/12


What do you do?

You say, "Yes, Lord. Your will be done." You don't marry this man and get on with your life.

Ever occur to you that this man prayed about marrying you, and God told HIm, "No"? Or maybe he's just not that into you?

Glory to Jesus Christ.
---Cluny on 1/31/12


Hi, Joni (c: Is Jesus your Husband?
---Bill_willa6989 on 1/31/12


Joni, are you passionately in love with Jesus? Jesus is coming back for a Bride without spot or wrinkle, maybe He is saving you for Himself.

Isaiah says, "For your maker is your husband, the Lord of Hosts is His name."

God said in Jeremiahm, "I will betroth (marry) you to me."

Maybe God is preparing you to be HIS bride and since God is a Jealous Bride, He won't have your heart divided between an earthly husband and God. I know this isn't what you want to hear, but being in a love relationship with Father God, Lord Jesus and Holy Spirit is the most AWESOME thing you can ever experience. Fall in Love with Jesus and see what happens, okay? (((huggs))))
---Donna5535 on 1/31/12


James, I will attempt to put your interpretations along side of those scriptures and spend some time on them. I dont want to give you a hasty response and sacrifice any merit you may have in your comments due to foolish pride when I only desire to come at the scriptures with a sober mind, humble heart and teachable spirit. Sometimes we feel just TOO Christian to be the student I guess. Thanks for taking the time to put the passages down and tie them together with your explanations. I have other points to make, but I will put them on hold so I dont minimize your thoughts on this valuable topic.
In His grip
---Poppa_Bear on 1/31/12


IF you are sure that God says,"he is not your husband", then go & tell your BF what God has said and follow it. It means God has another person for you that best suits HIS purpose for your life. God design marriage for man, so i plead with you not to lead God in this matter but follow HIM.
---Adetunji on 1/31/12


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Joni, How did God tell you he's not your husband?
---1st_cliff on 1/30/12


You have 2 choices:

Follow GOD's advice and you'll be blessed.

Follow your own heart and marry your boyfriend. Maybe blessings. Maybe hard times that will make you regret your own decision.

This is how GOD works and has us learn. He knows that some people will listen to Him and other people will have to learn via the school of hard knocks or life experiences.

GOD will respect your choice. Just remember that you'll reap the consequences here. Good or Bad.

The choice is yours.
---Sag on 1/30/12


sorry, Joni's boy friend, even God can't help you flick that sticky booger.
---aka on 1/30/12


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