If it's hard for you to wait, you may not have the "spiritual gift" of "celibacy". You must pray for God to help you....Walk in the Spirit.
---pat on 10/30/12|
james_l and cluny ... good eye...funny.
the vowels that i keep coming up with is I.O.U. (and sometimes Y and W).
---aka on 9/1/12|
Scott suggestion is excellent. Accountability, in the form of a mentor or discipler is also bringing in another person to pray with and for you and your marriage.
---Trish on 8/13/12|
\\\\I took a vowel of celibacy till I get married\\
---cat on 8/11/12\\
And what vowel did you take?
The E, the I, the A, or the Y?
I hope you didn't pay for an O or U.
Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 8/13/12|
First congrats on getting married and soberity. Sexual temptation is one of the hardest temptations we (humans) face. Pray for a great and pure honeymoon. Get some accountablility and don't hang out alone with each other.
---Scott1 on 8/13/12|
\\I took a vowel of celibacy till I get married\\
---cat on 8/11/12
Just as a matter of clarity,
Celibacy means that you take a vow not to ever get married. The word comes from Latin "caelebs" which simply means "unmarried"
You cannot take a vow of celibacy "until you get married" because the vow is intended that you do not get married at all for as long as you live.
I think what you meant is that you took a vow of abstinance
---James_L on 8/12/12|
Sexual desire for one's future spouse is NOT lust per se. It's just part of the human condition.
As far as praying to remain chaste, there's a story about St. Augustine on this matter. He was praying, "Lord, grant me chastity," while secretly thinking, "But not yet."
The only way we can gain patience is by having it tested. The only way to reach humility is by being humiliated. And the only way we can achieve chastity is by being honest about our sexuality and saying, "NO!!" to the improper use of sex, which includes outside of marriage.
Now you see the importance of regular and moderate fasting and abstinence I've talked about before?
Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 8/12/12|
KarenD: I don't remember cat saying how long he/she is sober. Could be a week. Could be 10 years. How do you know cat is in early sobriety?
Quite possibly cat is a Baby Christian. Wants to obey, but is not sure how to pray. Some new believers don't know how to pray, especially if they are from a faith that teaches rote prayer.
Cat already expressed a desire to obey.
---? on 8/12/12|
?----I did answer the question. Cat can pray all he/she wants, but if he/she doesn't do what is right, the prayers are useless. You can pray all you want, but if you aren't willing to do something those prayers are fruitless. God won't make you do anything. He expects you to do what is right. Someone who is barely in sobriety needs to wait a long time before getting involved in a serious relationship in the first place. Marriage will not keep anyone sober.
---KarenD on 8/12/12|
while you are at it, ask God BEFORE you get married why your spouse to be is encouraging you to break your vows.
btw...jesus said not to make a vow or promise. let your yes be yes and your no be no. if you turn into gray what is black and white, your marriage might become black and blue.
---aka on 8/11/12|
cat: Read Scripture on this matter. 1 Corinthians 6 tells us to honor God with our bodies. Scripture also says to flee fornication. Pray those Scripture verses for yourself. Ask God to help you honor Him with your body. Memorize that part of 1 Corinthians and meditate on it. Ask God to help you flee fornication. Confess your lust, if you have any.
KarenD: Why don't you answer the person's question?
---? on 8/11/12|
You can help each other. One thing, I would say, is do things where there are other people. It can be good to do things as groups so you two grow in relating with each other and others in our Jesus family and you don't get isolated and independent. That idol of independence can wreck everything. God "gives us richly all things to enjoy." (in 1 Timothy 6:17) There are plenty of different very good things to enjoy. And immorality is not very good.
---willie_c: on 8/11/12|
cat....The right thing to DO is to abstain until marriage. You are the one who decides which way you will go.
---KarenD on 8/11/12|
Pray for strength to obey God.
---Trish on 8/11/12|