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I Want My Date To Give Me Money

Should I continue to date a man that always puts his friends first when it comes to giving financially before me whom he wants to marry. He knows I have hardships. He gives to other women and frineds before helping me.

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 ---MAndy on 4/28/05
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You better get this straight before you marry him. He does not consider you or your needs now. What makes you think he will change when you marry him? If he is thoughtful in other areas(which I doubt), I would at least have a talk with him about this before coming to a decision about leaving. He may change. You need to address this,right away. No one is a mind reader. if he does not change, I would get away from him, quickly as I could. Don't take chances like that. He seems to be harboring ugly and ill-feelings toward you. Not good, at all.
---Robyn on 2/17/11

DROP HIM a lady who has been there in your shoes if he is doing this to you now then you know in your heart what it will be like after marriage...ask God to put something in the way of allowing the marriage to take a survivor of abuse I can honestly tell you that it will get worse for you and you deserve far better than this man.....God has someone special for you...
---Fran on 2/13/08

Get rid of him In a heart beat. Get rid of him. After you marry him you be living on the streets.
---catherine on 6/27/07

May be he knows where he stands with the friends and wants to establish whether you love him or you just want a man to sort out your financial problems. No man wants to feel used!!
---Maryanne on 6/26/07

Have you ever ASKED your BF for specific financial help? Or do you expect him to be psychic?

OTOH, just WHY should he give you money? Do you think the fact that you are dating gives you claim on his funds? (You've not said you are officially engaged, only that you are dating and he wants to marry you.)
---jack on 5/30/05

Why are you looking to him for financial support? Avoid envying those he gifts. Can you focus on yourself as capable through the strength of God of straightening out your own finances? Your friend may see you as not in need of aid, not a bad way to be thought of. Do you expect him to support you if you two marry? Talk to him and to God about how the two of you view money. Generosity is good. Not looking for a handout is good. Talk & pray and you'll get to know BOTH of you better!
---Ann on 5/27/05

Why are you looking to him for financial support? It sounds like are jealous those he gifts. A more proactive approach might be to focus on yourself as capable of straightening out your own finances. He may be seeing you as strong and not in need of aid, not a bad way to be thought of. Are you expecting him to support you after you are married? Talk to him about how the two of you view money Generosity is good. Not looking for a handout is good. Talk to him & you'll get to know both of you better.
---Ann on 5/27/05

Mandy--- If someone that is close to you knows that your in need and doesn't help you, or even offer to help you, than, what does that tell you? On top of all that, he's helping other women and his friends right in your face. I'm not perfect but I would never do that. You can do much better. I know some unsaved people even that would not do this. Give him the brush.
---Ken on 4/30/05

Mandy, If he really cared for you, knowing that you have hardships, but helps others than, what do you think?
---Cliff on 4/30/05

Do yourself a big favor and dump him now. I have seen people like this before, and believe me they don't change!
---Char on 4/30/05

I wonder if he is afraid of giving you money? He may think that by doing that, he would be giving you the impression that he was trying to "buy" you. or put you under some obligation.
---Alan_of_U.K. on 4/30/05

before you decide to dump him, take a look at how you have presented your hardships to him. have you made them in the form of complaints, or have you asked him for help? perhaps he is a man who responds to asking for help. perhaps the other people are manipulating his money from him. explore the entire situation before you decide. perhaps he is doing it to show off to you. maybe he doesnt know you wnat his help too.
---barb on 4/30/05

This is a no brainer, you will know them by their fruits. If this guy is doing this now, do you think that he will get better? There is a greater chance that he will get worse. I know from experience. Read between the lines, he has no respect for you!
---Mary on 4/30/05

I have been saved now for 33 years, I love God, and I ask for wisdom in faith, and He gives it to me. I am certainly no better than any of you, and I don't say this to be right or cruel, but Curt, Sue, Maryanne and RUSSEll need wisdom in the Lord.
---Mark on 4/30/05

I agree with Curt,Sue and Marianne.
---RUSSELL on 4/30/05

Why are so many people so materialistic? Would you marry this guy if he was a poor carpender? Do you love him?
---sue on 4/29/05

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curt& Maryanne, You have GOT to be kidding! I would say something to him, and if he kept doing this, I would drop him like a hot potatoe.
---a_friend on 4/29/05

I agree with what some of you have been saying. Don't get involved with any man over money matters. A man just contacted me who was trying to make me think that he was in love with him and was proposing to me in marriage, which I didn't pay any attention to, and then he wanted me to enter into a financial agreement with him. Some men will try to deceive you, tell you they love you just so they can get something out of you.We really need the wisdom of God to quide us and not go by what looks appealing. May God bless and guide you all.
---Rosie on 4/28/05

Go ahead and dump the guy before he gets tired of hearing you asking for money and dumps you. Kinda sounds like your using him. Why dont you pray that God will make you self sufficient, and if you deside to stay with this guy it will because of some other reason than money. Ladies do you like supporting your man financially??
---Randy_G on 4/28/05

He sounds like a real prince, dump him. He seems to live for these other people anyway. Puts up a good front, but is not fair in how he is treating you.
---NV_Barbara on 4/28/05

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it sounds like he is just testing your character, to find out what kind of a person you are. don't take it too personally.
---curt on 4/28/05

What is it you want out of this relationship? Are you dating him just because he may have money? I sense a little jealousy, of being left out. Money has been the number one reason marriages are broken. Do not build your marrage on these issues. Build it on Christ and it has to be from both parties to unite a truly harmonious marriage. If that is your goals then that marriage is good in Christ. In support.
---Blue on 4/28/05

Mandy, Get out now before you get drawn in even more! If this man is doing this now it certainly will get worse, you can count on it . Thank God you see this now before you get committed. Your really in a good position because you can get out of it with little or no damage to you or him. There are good guy's out there in the Lord, just pray and trust God. Patients is the secret.
---John on 4/28/05

i can't tell you what to do but he needs to not just think of his friends try talking to him and telling him how you feel an pray for God's guidance if you really want to marry him God is not going to stop you that is why you have to pray pray pray give it time before you marry him talk to him about things like that that you dont klike or understand set the record straight get everything off your chest and ask him to do the same so the record is clean and there will no future conflicts about these particular things
---andre9789 on 4/28/05

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