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No Bible Believing Single Women

What happened to Ephesians 5?

I've read through tons of women's profiles, and see lots of scripture refs. I have yet to see a woman say she wants God's recipe for marriage as defined in Ephesians 5. Is there no woman left who wants a marriage built on these principles?

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 ---Nicholas on 4/28/05
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I am currently courting a very wonderful christian guy on that basis. Something I have realised is that guys are the leaders, and we women are very much helpers. It is what we are meant for, doesn't mean we are powerless or anything, but it is where our ability lies. Guys bear alot of responsibility in a Godly relationship and I believe that us women are to encourage and support while our partner stands before God with their every action in the way they treat us.
---Teneke on 2/19/08

Wherever you find a man willing to love his wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her, you will find a willing, submissive woman.
---Deborah on 2/14/08

well solomon said i have inteviewed my entire kingdom and found that one man out of a thousand may be considered to be upright- but not one woman! the truth is man you shouldn't be trusting anyone but God. and don't expect anyone to be as righteous as you. sarcasm.
---matthew on 7/31/05

MY GOD!!!!! Kate i am concerned for you!How can your husband leave you just after 5 months? how long did you know him beofer you married him? sounds like you might of rushed into it too quick, and maybe you should of waited to marry a pastor, if you want to contact me im sioux6967
---susanna on 7/31/05

It's absolutely not true that Biblical women aren't 'out there'. You need to spend time getting to know someone. Reading a profile can send up 'red flags', but nothing more. I've been counseled often to know a person well and closely for a year before making any true decisions about that person. That advice has proven to be true time and time again. A profile on the internet just doesn't cut it! Read the book, "Date or Soul Mate" by Dr. Neil Clark Warren. That might help, too!
---jera4399 on 5/25/05

I believe in man and wife being submissive to one another, I also do not mind the man being the head, as long as I still have a say, and he shows me respect, and does not treat me as weak, because I am as strong if not stronger as any man out there.
---Tiffany on 5/22/05

The best advice is never to just believe what the person tells you either over the net or to your face. Spend time with him and "discover" his heart. I do believe that Father loves each of us so much that He will give us warning signs (like the absence of peace) if someone is not genuine in his/her love for Him first. Any wonderful marriage is not just built on a written word but instead on each person's personal relationship with his/her Savior. The written Word points us to the living Savior and reveals to us His heart. Everything flows out of that relationship.
---Linda_Smith on 5/4/05

I would LOVE to have an Ephesians 5 man!! Don't tell me you really ARE one!!! I cannot believe there really is someone out there who would really lay down his life for his wife. Who would not compare his wife with his mother and love his wife as much as he loves himself!!! Are you really like that?
---Julie on 5/3/05

It depends on what you are looking for, just to read women's profiles or to get to know them so you know what they are all about, if you are looking for people who will lie on their profiles, then keep reading, you need to get to know the women first, the bible says he that findeth a wife not she that findeth a husband, you must do the seeking to find and not the other way around.
---schola on 5/2/05

do you need to see it spelt out or are u seeking faults which am sure,you found and will continue to find?some people are willing to write or say what they know u want 2 hear whereas they are actually a pack of lies!good luck.
---mya on 5/2/05

Thats the problem, Alan.. so is HE.. looking for another "innocent" Christian woman to abuse! Mind you.. he tells me about all of the other woman he solicits... while he is trying to solicit me for sex.. one week before the divorce that "he" filed for is final! I pray that he gets the exact opposite of me the next time! (ungodly,not physically fit, unsexual,unattractive, dishonest, unfaithful, terrible mother, inactive) and more!.. and then he can see what he had!
---Kat on 5/1/05

Kat ... we are here !!!
---Alan_of_U.K. on 5/1/05

Madison ... some men are pigs to their wives, even when they claim to be Christian. My heart goes out to you
---Alan_of_U.K. on 5/1/05

When my husband was seeking a wife, he told Father specifically that he wanted a wife who loved God more than she loved him. I wanted a husband who loved God more than me. We both got what we asked for.
---Linda_Smith on 5/1/05

Wow Linda and Robin!... You are both lucky ladies!!!! I have had such tremendously bad experience with Christian men... (the one before my husband even told me I was like a "Proverbs" woman,) which to me was the biggest compliment ever! But then, my "Christian" and adulterous husband, is now leaving me after less than 5 months of marriage. He told me, that I needed to find a Pastor to marry!.... Show me a Christian man that actually APPRECIATES a Christian woman!!!!!...
---Kat on 4/30/05

I did not read that the gentleman wanted to be a husband under Ephesians 5, which states a husband should cherish his wife.

If a woman feels cherished, there shouldn't be any problems with her "submitting". Just what does Nicolas have in mind??
---carolyn on 4/30/05

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i dont know if this is a popular view, but a friend of mine who is a minister said he had never known of a man who cherished his wife who had any problem with her not submitting.

obviously, those men weren't anything like the young man who was being beat up by his wife.
---carolyn on 4/30/05

After being burned by that submission experience, I am not so sure I will be so willing to give up my career choices and do as my "husband" bids.
---Madison on 4/30/05

I did not have an Ephesians 5 man. My ex was not willing to love me one iota the way it is described in scriptures. He also insisted that I not stay home and raise my kids, but instead made me go to college, he chose my major, he decided where I would work, and even though I almost had a nervous breakdown working where I worked, he refused to let me quit to find less stressful work. I submitted in all of that. Then, he left me, and married someone else.

Now, I am alone, going to grad school to make a career change to do the job I originally wanted to do in the first place.
---Madison on 4/30/05

pray to the Lord to meet the right woman on line who wants to do Gods will. He promised to supply our needs in earth and in heaven." but my God will supply all my need that pertains to life and godliness"
---barba3644 on 4/30/05

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Even things he has done that I didn't particularly like were still done in an attitude and motive of pure love toward me and it is the heart that matters most.
---Linda_Smith on 4/30/05

It would be painful for him to watch me destroy myself with anger and bitterness but he would not leave me because of it because he knows who he is in Christ. Who he is is not founded on how I behave or don't behave. It is founded on the person and work of Christ. With that kind of assurance, he is free to love no matter what. He holds second place only to Jesus in my heart and there is nothing bad I can say of him because his love toward me is pure and his record spotless.
---Linda_Smith on 4/30/05

Like Robin, I have one of those wonderful Eph.5 husbands who loves me unconditionally, even when I am at my ugliest. He has never rendered evil for evil or reviling for reviling nor has he ever slandered me with his mouth either in my presence or out of it. He represents the security of Christ to me and I have never distrusted him. I willingly submit myself to someone who loves me so much that nothing I could do would ever change his heart toward me. He has been consistent and unchanging in his love toward me.
---Linda_Smith on 4/30/05

I have to agree with those who say it takes an Ephesians 5 man to have an Ephesians 5 woman. I often hear men claim that women are to submit to the man. However they rarely acknowledge that if they were truely giving love, they would gladly do what pleased their wife.
I have no problem "submitting" to my husband. He is such a blessing! He displays such pleasure over pleasing me. I in return can't wait to please him! I can't say that about my first husband. I was convinced that he'd rather die than do anything just to please me!
---Robin on 4/29/05

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I am an Eph.5 women but, it is my experience that men on this site seem to not care about this quality. In my experience the guys I have met here are more interested in worldly values not Eph 5 values.
---Marla on 4/29/05

He gently calls her back to Him, loving her and wooing her till her heart is firmly fixed on Him alone. His love NEVER fails, never gives up, never behaves unseemly, is not proud. He bears, believes, hopes, and endures all things and He is in us. His love is not narrow but shed aBROAD in our hearts. Nevertheless, what is done is done and it is admirable to look for a Godly woman. However, it is even more admirable to look within first before we look without.
---Linda_Smith on 4/29/05

The Word does make provision for the believer if the unbeliever desires to depart but if he/she desires to remain, he/she is to continue to be loved unconditionally by the believing spouse. Anything else is making a provision for the flesh other than the one Jesus already made. I don't know the specific details of your marriage and divorce but I do know the heart of God and the love of Christ for His church that is evident toward her even when her back is to Him.
---Linda_Smith on 4/29/05

"If that was true, I would still be married."

That is exactly the point. We who are living and walking in the Spirit are to give people what they need, not what they deserve and unconditional love is exactly what it says...unconditional, not based on performance or just how ugly or how wonderfully someone can act. Jesus loved and united Himself to us in our most unlovely state, when we were yet sinners. That's the example of selfless, unconditional love that is to be evident in the lives of those walking in the light.
---Linda_Smith on 4/29/05

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Take a look at chara 9557!
---chara9557 on 4/29/05

"Wherever you find a man willing to love his wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her, you will find a willing, submissive woman."

If that was true, I would still be married. There are many "Christian" women who love to get high on the top 40 praise and worship songs and listen to feel-good sermons, but when it comes to living by the Spirit instead of the flesh, they have no part of it.
---Nicholas on 4/29/05

"Society will quickly point out the first part of Eph 5"

I think just the opposite is true. Society produces women who believe it is absurd to think that they should submit to their husbands. It also produces men who think it is absurd to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her.

That is the foundation for my question. Where are the women who are glad to be set apart from what society wants?
---Nicholas on 4/29/05

Exactly what do you want in a woman? there are no 'perfect' men or women...but, when they are striving eveyday to please the Lord, that is the one I would want to be in companionship with. putting God first. pray and ask the Lord to send her your way.....Jan4876
---Jan on 4/29/05

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Yes, of course I am willing to be an Ephesians 5 man, but only because the Spirit enables that desire in me. The credit and Glory belongs to God. The flesh fights against both submission and sacrificial love, and I can't help but wonder if most women fail to mention Ephesians 5 because their flesh makes them unwilling to provide their half of God's ingredients for marriage. I wonder if they are afraid to mention it because they think others will want a slave for a wife. But a man with the Spirit understands how both ingredients create an ideal marriage, not a master/slave relationship.
---Nicholas on 4/29/05

Hi there,
I believe there are women who want this kind of a relationship but with it they want the part that the man has also! Society will quickly point out the first part of Eph 5 but have a tendancy to leave out the latter part. Wives are to be submissive to their husbands and husbands are to love their wives as God loves the Church. So I believe this question could be turned around and asked of men also! :)
---Kathy on 4/29/05

I have to say this and I hope that people do not take to offense but I believe that people ref. to scripture not knowing the true meaning. I have myself over looked what a scripture was saying. I call it surface reading. There could be one word that could make all the diff. Again I speak from experience. There and Their have two diff. meanings and sometimes people over look things such as my example. We are all here to learn, lets not slam people for not knowing what they do not understand.
---Lori on 4/29/05

I think that most women don't like that passage because usually the only part that is preached and upheld is the 'women submit to husband as to the Lord' part. This part has been used against us so many times when our husbands want control, and do not submit also in love to their wives, nor love them as Christ loves the church.
---robin6485 on 4/29/05

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on Women and Ephesians 5 as an Eph:5 woman myself, When I to encounter a potential spouse, I am first searching to see if he is totally submissive to "God" in all things as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; he must not merely "act" as the head verbally but he must "Be" the head in all things. Ephesians 5:21 submiting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. He must seek God in the solving of major and minor elements of marriage. thank God that if we remain faithful to God and submit to our own husbands we shall reap if we faint not.
---India on 4/28/05

What is your profile? Does it describe you as an Ephesians 5 man? Are you willing to love a wife as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for Her? Most of the men I see in the profiles are interested in every other worldly thing but love and sacrifice for someone else.
---Madison on 4/28/05

Just because we don't say Eph. 5 doesn't mean we don't want it. How can we not when God wrote it into our DNA to want Him and more of Him. :-)
---Veronica on 4/28/05

Great Point brother
---juan4544 on 4/28/05

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