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Blog For Single Parents

Is anyone in need of a blog for single parents. Especially advice for moms of teen and preteen boys. I find it to be a real challenge and would love to have some one to relate to. Single parenting is hard.

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 ---kathy3339 on 5/24/05
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wow, I have all the post I have many questions:

1: Chief of questions: Under what circumstances did you, and you child's father get in bed ( married, or just dating)

2: What caused you to be a single parent? Did the father leave you for another, was their already another? Did you drive him away?

3: Crucial question: What have you done, and what are you doing to ensure that the father continues to be a part of his child's life?
---francis on 4/7/13

I am a single mom to two boys.... One is 17 and the other is 9. Their father has nothing to do with them, except maybe a text or a call once a year. I have no family and no help for them. I wouldn't change anything, they really are a blessing, but I get so tired, there isn't any me time or time to meet and make friendships.
---Paulina on 1/27/13

Single parent of Three children...My youngest will be turning 18 this month.
We went through a tough moment for about a year and a half, but he has come out of it quite well.God is faithful and alone knows their Hearts.God is a true and Just God.
---char on 6/18/08

I am a single mom of a teenage boy. It is definately a difficult task. I do a lot of praying. I would love to talk to other single moms.

---Cynthia on 5/24/08

Yes, I am a single mom of three boys. My oldest is 13 and is going through some tough times. It would be great to find other single moms in this situation to relate to.
---Amber on 9/24/07

Hi. i am the single parent of an 18yo male. I know the challenges. I pray alot and God has helped me with him and then alot of it has been him finding out the hard way. He was born in 1987 and I've been single since 1990. It is difficult and in retrospect, I wish I had found him a positive, christian, male role model to have helped me through some of the tougher times. God Bless You and your journey.
---Karyn on 7/18/07

My mother is a widow. I am female child.

Advice from my mom -
"I have never tried to be the dad and the mom. I am the mother."

Male role models provided other ways.
Male teachers at school.
Male choir leaders in the church.
Male neighbours.
Male bosses at work.
Combined male & female leaders in the after school programs.
Healthy same sex relationships.
Even Bible study helps to describe roles.
---barbara67 on 3/6/07

NVBarb - Was there ever a time when you found yourself overprotective of your son, and realized you had to stop? If so how did you handle it? How did you prevent him from being "momma's boy" I am a tough mom but I'm just now realizing that I'm not as tough as I thought, I 'm really something of a push over. Especially since their dad left, I've felt sorry for them. I'm now trying to instill in them more of a work ethic. I know boys need to know how to work hard. - thanks for writing.
---kathy3339 on 6/5/05

My son's father left when my son was 5. Often I felt like I was swinging by the seat of my pants. I was fairly strict and praise God he was a good kid, maybe because I was strict? He's not a Mama's boy, but we are close, he is now 31 years old and I'm very proud of him.Don't give up sisters, its worth the love and time spent with your children.
---NV_Barbara on 6/5/05

Barbara67 - thank you so much for the scriptures. You are a blessing to us. Please stay with us we need you.
P.S. send us some of those comics I dont get the paper. God Bless you!
---kathy3339 on 6/1/05

Madison - thanks for writing us about the Christian Brigade. I looked it up on the web and it came right up. Lots of information. But they are not in my area. Which is odd seeing that they were founded here in Illinois. Does anyone have any other recommendations. How does Big Brother Big Sister work? Madison thanks for bloggin and please keep writing.
---kathy3339 on 6/1/05

1 Peter chapters 1 & 2
Chapter 5 is about Elders and Young Men.

Paul's charge to 1 Timothy 6:11-16

Ecclesiates 12:1
2 Timothy 2:22

Psalm 119:9 - The question of many youth.

Proverbs - to teach prudence and simple, knowledge and discretion to the young"

Selection of a Wife - Proverbs 31:10-31

Proverbs 31 - 'sayings of King Lemuel - an oracle his mother taught him" - a mother son interaction

There is more study about growing up
---barbara67 on 6/1/05

yes, Cynthia, I'm sorry I took over the conversation. I'm feeling much better now. Kathy is a great help!!! I don't know any thing about boys,so I'm not much help.It can be hard not having some one in the home to back you up. AN OVERLOAD that's what I'm going through!!!
---Laureen on 6/1/05

Cynth4498- Come back! We miss you at the single parents blog. We want you here with us. We really can support each other. If your issues are too private please write me at kathy3339. You are loved, and very important!!!! to Jesus and us.
---kathy3339 on 5/31/05

Kathy thank you so much for writing to me I feel so much beter knowing I'm not alone. in thought and feeling that others understand. I live in a small town and am only divorce in family. {I make others uncomfortable} so you are a blessing to me!!!!
---Laureen on 5/31/05

Yes, I have talked with pastor. though I can seperate my self from them I can't change their preconceived ideas of divorced women. they are most likely hurting in a different area and are hiding or trying to feel important by directing attention away from self. my parents are like this and am learning to deal with the fact. the opposite is true of others. they feel SOOO sorry for me. they shouldn't. I am joyful much of the time. I'm not a Saint to raise teens alone, just crazy---about them!
---Laureen on 5/31/05

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Loreen - Can you talk to pastoral staff about your feelings & daughter? I got counselling at church during our hardship. Having the comfort of knowing someone is aware of your struggles helps. I have felt the same things you have. But I found that sometimes my own pain is strong, I'm projecting the rejected feelings onto others. It's very common. But if you are being judged, it's wrong. No one but God is to judge. I really understand you. please write me more. I'm praying for you.
---kathy3339 on 5/31/05

Ran out of room. Um I am in many of the possitions again as many people didn't step up, just complaned & judged. I know in my heart I did a good job raiseing my daughter. & that teens rebell. but in the prosses she has stopped reading her bible and dating out of our faith and doesn't want to be "christian" if they hurt "good people like my mom" I can take "slander" for my self. All people need God.I try not to get angery.
---Laureen on 5/30/05

I have been going to this church since before my divorce.10 years? God has been using me. while I was married I was looked well on. I still am the one that people come to when some thing needs to be done. I was able to do more for my church family when I didn't have 2 jobs. but do what I am allowed. see now that my spouse is gone. people seem to think I am less of a Christian. so as not to be a stumbing block, I stepped aside. so the "real godly" people could fill in my spots.
---Laureen on 5/30/05

Good morning - just signing in and cheering everyone on with great happiness. Has anyone seen the last "girl" mess in the comic cartoon by Lynn Johnson?
---barbara67 on 5/30/05

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Loreen how long have you been at this church? Have your kids always gone there with you. Do you all have established relationships and friends there? Maybe you can ask people to just pray for you and your girls. Let them know that she's sensitive right now, that perhaps she just needs friends that listen more than advise at the moment. Please write more if you can.
---kathy3339 on 5/29/05

Marla (continued) I decided that I would suck it up and be the one that talks to them about all the issues. They are in my care, and I always want the lines of communication to be open. I also dont want them to be in a situation with their peers where the topic turns PG13 or R and they dont even know it. If they are not aware then how are they going to 'flee temptation.'
---kathy3339 on 5/29/05

Maria, have you read Dr. Dobson's "Bringing up Boys"? Also please let us know what books you have read that have helped in whatever areas. About discussing puberty. Do it anyway. I decided after waiting for their dad, and we're still waiting... I didnt want them to grow a beard and get married before some one explained it all to them. OH also Dobson's "Preparing for Adolesence is what prepared them for teen changes. They said it covered about everything.
---kathy3339 on 5/29/05

I am a mother of 2 teen girls. I find that people seem to think because I lost my husband I am a bad parent. and that they need to try to raise my kids. My daughter is turneed off by church because she says I'm a beter mom then them with their kids. and they shouldn't tell her what to do when their kids are a mess. how do I get her to come back to church? I teach and work with kids of all ages. so feel that this is the church wants me.
---Laureen on 5/28/05

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Thanks Kathy for brining it up. I am a single mom to an almost 14 yr old son and he has never really had any male role models in his life either christians or not. I am going crazy reading books and trying to talk to him about stuff (he hates talking to mom about puberty and junk) Yes a blog would be wonderful and really a help to many I would think
---Marla on 5/28/05

Someone said

Read Zits

It is a comic strip about a teenager and it is a warm and friendly cartoon that I like. My daughter says the blonde is now her husband!!!!
---barbara67 on 5/27/05

Teens use energy to grow, work, play and study. Sunday afternoon sleeps help. Growing spurts go on for teenage boys until they are about 19. (Girls only about 14). Even then boys will grow another 1-2 inches until they are 21.

Proper eating habits and enough food are also necessary. Calorie intake must at least equal calories output. For growing children there must be a little extra calorie for growth - Lose weight diets are the reverse.

Even blood types matter - (O's are lazier).
---barbara67 on 5/27/05

It sounds like they are going through the normal growing pains of adolescence. My suggestion is to get them involved in outdoor type things that build self-esteem. Hiking, rock climbing, camping types of things. My son used to go with men from my church on hiking trips and they would camp for the weekend as they hiked.
---Madison on 5/25/05

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barb, cont-- I have one who is deceitfully lazy, a problem that has been around from day one. We've talked and disiplined. Yes I did spank them when they were little. I think that I have pitied them too much. Dont you think the "mother bear" response in us, is alot of times harmful when we're on our own? I'm guiltly anyway. What's your advise folks? Other wise they are very loving, fun, creative and intelligent.
---kathy3339 on 5/24/05

Barb, thanks for asking. My boys are not good sports. They get very easily upset and let their attitudes show in public settings. Rather pouty. Out bursts of anger at home. Nothing phyically hazardous. I have had them in counselling, especially when their dad went away. We all talk alot, so there are no walls up. Dad's gone but he keeps in touch regularly but long distance. They are rather lazy too. Hard work or physical disipline is evil... those are the issues at hand. (cont.)
---kathy3339 on 5/24/05

I agree with the need for male role models. My ex left during my son's high school years, but he did keep in touch with him regularly. He just wasn't a good role model.

My church had a great program for boys when he was an adolescent called Christian Service Brigade. See if you can find a church near you with that program. It is a great program for boys.
---Madison on 5/24/05

What are the particular issues that you face with your son?
---barbara67 on 5/24/05

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Well so far it looks like male role models are hard to come by for boys of single moms. So dads any advise for rearing these guys. Mine are a bit "soft". And their dad was raised by a single mom and older sister and it really shows if you know what I mean. Help us out here we need some blog advise.
---kathy3339 on 5/24/05

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