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How To Stop My Anger Problems

I get really angry lately about even the smallest things. The most recent was tonight when my boyfriend didn't want to see me because he was too tired!! How do I stop my anger spurts? I always say things I really don't mean! My anger hurts people in the end! How do i stop?

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 ---Jennifer on 6/18/05
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Anger in itself is not sinful, but be slow to anger. (Prov 14:17, Prov 14:29, James 1:19-20) Remember Cain's anger turned into hate and murder so seek the way of love for love covers a multitude of sins and overlooks many offenses. Through the spirit you can overcome a hot temper. Handle anger in a godly way. And remember, do not let the sun go down on your anger.

Do an online KJV bible search for the word "anger" and learn how it was used in the bible. Also, do an online KJV bible search for "one another," "each other," "encourag," and "comfort" to learn how to apply love and, in turn, control anger.
---Steveng on 6/2/11

There is a level of anger that is demon-aided. It is not really you that is generating it and that is why you cannot control it. Sincere prayers to God in Jesus' name to deliver you from all whatever is aiding/influencing you to get so angry will help you out.
---Adetunji on 6/3/11

There are two ways to walk in life. One who walks in the spirit, in which we do not fulfill the desires of the flesh. And to walk in the flesh, which we are slaves to obey. It must be remembered we wrestle, have to resist and war against the desires of the flesh that temptation can bring and the spiritual battle going on around us. We are told to put off what you call anger, but is better said as wrath. To put of is to strip yourself of something, like taking a shirt off. Of coarse this is far more difficult but through Gods power it is assured. The key to prevent this is Corinthians 10:3-6. This is a verse that always strengthens me in times such as you have presented, "you have not resisted sin to the point of shedding blood".
---willa5568 on 6/2/11

I'm going through the same things. I just broke up with my girlfriend because of the anger that I take out on her. I have no clue how to stop my outbursts, but I am looking up treatment and medecines to possibly stop these issues.
---Austin on 5/31/11

It's simple but not so simple. You cannot change yourself, but God can change you. Be patient.
---catherine on 5/16/08

Jennifer::Did you know Pride and anger are related,togetherthey are a lethal cocktail.Its a sense of selfesteem gone haywire,equivalent to a heartquake.The antidote is PEACE.Peacerful people are a tower of strength while those given to fits of temper, anger are weak,not in control. It's a cowardly tactic to obtain your ascendancy to get your way. Humility and peace are the stronger qualities ask Our Lady of Peace "Be it done to me according to your word?Not my will dear lord but Your will>"
---Emcee on 5/15/08

i have been going through the same thing at the moment with everyone including my boyfriend. All i do is sit down and ask my boyfriend if we can do something that we used to do such as walk down to nearest park or for a drive and talk to him about my problems, you could try and take a time out and breathe sometimes just ignore the person your having conflict with.'
---laura on 5/14/08

I understand exactly where you are coming from. It has to do with "misplace dependencies", and sorry to say "unrealistic expendencies". Allow me to explain.When you put your dependency in others rather than Christ you get your mind filled with. I wish he or she would do this or that.I won't be able to write all of this in. I've been there not nice isn't.God is doing something already in your own heart. Write me . we can talk more.
---Mike on 12/31/07

Robyn's reply below is an excellent reply and it's worth studying closely.
---Caring on 12/30/07

The fact that you are acknowledging the problem is a start. Hopefully you pray and read your Bible daily to seek christ-like ways. Although it is impossible to go through life without getting angry we are not to go sleep on our anger. Ask for forgiveness from whoever you get angry with or if there is something God shows you is the root of your anger ask him to deliver you from it. Also look up all the scriptures you can find on anger and ask God for the wisdom you need to control it.
---Dianne on 12/29/07

When we expect too much of some person...and don't even get to know the person so we know what really is good for the person to be doing...imposing our own demands >

"nor as being lords over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock." (1 Peter 5:3)

let each person be who he/she really is, and LOVE the person > "And I will very gladly spend and be spent for your souls; though the more abundantly I love you, the less I am loved." (2 Corinthians 12:15)
---Bill_bila5659 on 5/22/07

Lee, Thank you for the agreement.++
---catherine on 5/22/07

catherine...I agree with that.We do not change ourselves it is Christ that changes us.
---JIM on 5/22/07

You cannot change yourself. We all have to have [need] Jesus. It's up to Him to change us, however, you have to be willing. Now this>>>Fear God, and keep His commandments-for this is the whole duty of man. [ECC.12-13].
---catherine on 5/22/07

You sound exhausted. Get some earplugs. Get some sleep. Forget about the TV and those other distractions. Take care of yourself.
---jhonny on 5/21/07

Your emotions are out of control. You need to be less dependent on your boyfriend. This is why I keep my friendgirls and other people in my circle and not just be available to a man. Even though I am married. Some women forsake all of their friends, family, everybody for that man/boyfriend. Then when the boyfriend/man does not want to bothered, they are at a loss as to what to do with themselves. Been there and done that. More to come.
---Robyn on 5/21/07

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More: You have a dependent personality. You are expecting much more from these people than they are able to give back to you and that angers you. Your anger hurts you more because you feel the effects of it. Develop more hobbies and diversions and you want be so dependent on others for your happiness. Jesus is the best friend you can have,by the way. He is never tired,upset and he loves so good. Try Him. You will like Him.
---Robyn on 5/21/07

Immaturity and lack of experience causes us to say and do things out of our emotions. Selfishness, pride and arrogance follows close behind. One thing for sure anger is dangerous and can lead to terrible things. Seek help for this problem. Anger can lead to health problems, too. Migraines, cancer, blood pressure, heart problems.
---Robyn on 5/21/07

Part I of Reply:
Please know that you are not alone in this. Many people experience anger. Christ too became very angry when He saw what was happening within His Father's House. When you feel anger arising, the first thing is to step away from the situation, drink some water and then really try to take long, slow deep breaths until you feel calm. Part II to follow...
---Monika on 5/21/07

Prt II: This may all sound like nonsence, but it works! Many of us cannot comprehend that Jesus Christ is there for us 24/7, we only need to ask. Anger = fear. Many young adults out there tend to wrap much of their focus around their boyfriends, because there is a void in their own lives. Based on my own experience it was the lack of support and attention that I was receiving from my parents, causing certain responses from others to trigger negative emotions. God Bless you.
---Monika on 5/21/07

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had anger problem for yrs--bout 4 yrs ago saw anger is a sin and will not be in kingdom of God, i began to pray, seek God for deliverance. anger only causes HARM to all those round about you. try to find book by tim lahay--temper your temperment--excellent book--has scriptures written out that deals with this issue-bible says be angry and sin not; also take on whole armour of God, also helped me to stop and think, what would i do should jesus walk in right now???You can be overcomer---i am.
---jd on 6/26/05

Jennifer, don't feel alone - I am in the same boat lately and am going to get my hormone levels checked, I feel like I am out of control with my emotions. Ask God to help you stay calm and get a full medical, just to rule out any physical issues.
---Marcia on 6/20/05


The great part is that you recognize the problem. Many times, that's the hardest part. If your church doesn't offer anger management classes, look out in the community for one. It will help you understand the source of your anger and how to deal with it.

Life's so much more fun when you don't sweat the small stuff.
---Eg on 6/19/05

Jennifer, Dianne is right. You cannot get rid of the darkness in your life by "dealing with it" and trying to shovel it out the door. You must increase the light of God's Word in your life. More light, less darkness. Make sense?

Always remember the believers who have gone before, and keep looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of faith, so you don't get weary and faint in your mind (Heb 12:1-4). Remember, we all are changed into his image just by looking at him (2 Cor 3:18).
---Jeffrey on 6/19/05

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Have you recently tried to stop doing something that you have been doing for a long time? Drinking, smoking, depending on someone else for something that they could not give, etc. Or trying to be someone that you are not?
---gregg8944 on 6/19/05

Jennifer, it sounds like hormone trouble. Go to a doctor and get tested. I really don't think it is any more than that. Women go through this stuff all the time, but there are ways of fixing it. Just don't let a dr. talk you into taking anything until you check it out for side affects. I have been through it and all of my sisters have too.
---a_friend on 6/19/05

Jennifer: If you are angry, it is your fault. You don't have to be angry - you can give it to Jesus. His yoke is easy, and His burden light. It sounds like you are more hurt than angry. Express your hurt, and leave the repentance to him. If he loves you, your tears will melt his heart. Your anger will only harden it.
---Jerry on 6/18/05

I agree with Carol, this is an underlying spirit of "Rejection, Pride, and Abandonment' I know cause I have done the same things. I am reading a book about "Boundries When to say yes and when to say no" Try and find it. It is a Christian Author. It is helping me and Joyce Meyers has a lot of good material to help you to heal from that. Remember, it isn't always about us sis.
---roshell on 6/18/05

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Diane has some very good advice for you. If you love the man, pray that he gets his rest. Support him. After you have asked God to help, it may remain for a while because Satan will try to attack you with any old habits. Rebuke him and declare that you are past that milestone...all in the Blessed Name of Jesus..!! I Know....I am past a problem that was one of the worst ever.. I speak that in the name of Jesus..Harley
---Harley on 6/18/05

Dear Jennifer,
Getting angry is caused by that little devil inside!! Try this one: Every time as soon you feel anger comming up inside, you say: "Thank you Jesus, you are in my heart". That little devil hasn't longer his joy with you and will leave you forever! Try it, it works!!
---Ernst9433 on 6/18/05

I see a deeper problem here. Anger is deep rooted into your spirit. I see that you feel angry when you are abandoned. In order to deal with anger take some tests to see if you firstly don't have high blood pressure. Secondly, see a spirit-filled counsellor to see if there is some other underlying issues around your anger. Deal with the anger from the root and dig it out.
---Carol on 6/18/05

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