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My Boyfriend Flirts With Others

My boyfriend is continually flirting and looking at other women. He talks about how beautiful they are but bluntly says I'm not. Can he possibly be in love with me? I find him handsome and tell him so. He says he wants to marry me. I don't think I should.

Moderator - Of course don't marry him. People are on best behavior before marriage.

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 ---Nina on 9/19/05
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If he loves you he wont be looking elsewhere and he would think you are the most beautiful woman to him, no matter what you look like. I have learned from past experience,no matter how handsome a man is, when they treat you like dirt, they get uglier all the time till one day they are so ugly to you that you cant stand to look at them. And if they are ugly when you meet, if they treat you good, they get handsomer. You dont deserve to be treated like that, get a true christian, he wont be lusting.
---PAT on 2/16/08

I agree with the moderator, a person who really wants someone, will be on their [best] behavior(unfortunately many of the bad ones also do this), wouldn't do anything that would put their sweetheart in distress, like flirting with the opposite sex, It's no doubt a prelude of whats to come. Prayer, patience, godly wisdom is a must or else you will most likely be unhappy with that person. God Bless!
---Mrs._Morgan on 4/26/07

Drop him now. If his eyes are wondering now, who knows how far they will wonder once married. He is obviouosly looking for something that he will never find. Better to have him find that out for himself than to bring you down with him.
---earle9893 on 4/26/07

Get rid of him, He is bringing down your self esteem and you know that. God have someone so much better for you in life. Pray for guidance
---tonya3849 on 7/26/06

Get rid of him Nina. I would take that as an insult if a man said to me that I am not attractive. A Christian man is commanded to love his wife as he loves his own body -- I can't imagine him looking at his body and saying it's not attractive.
---Helen_5378 on 6/20/06

Get rid of him he has no respect for you now so he definately won't have any respect for you if you marry, Trust me i know you may think he will be different but he wont.Don't ruin the best part of your life with a loser like that, have enough respect for yourself to walk away with your head held high and your dignity!
---michelle on 6/20/06

no dont marry him! u'll be miserable and he is only showing u about a forth of what hes really like!! PRAY FOR HELP ASK FOR GUIDENCE AND WISDOM
---angie on 10/18/05

Maybe he does love you, has asked you to marry him, but you are vacillating. Is he trying to get you jealous.
Maybe he is saying ... yes they are beautiful, but it is you I love.
No ... I don't believe any of that! He seems to be a bad hat, and you should avoid him!
---alan8869_of_UK on 10/18/05

When in doubt DON'T!!!You already know and so does God that this is not the one.It's good that you are able to see this,and will be able to move forward to find someone who will treat you will the respect that you deserve.God Bless you
---missy on 9/22/05

Be there, done that. After years of forgiving him, thinking that he would change, I found out that he was doing much more than looking. By the time we parted my self esteem was so low. Naturally he blamed me. I have always believed but it was during this valley of pain that I developed a closer relationship with God. Please don't accept his behavior as I did---unless he becomes a Christian, nothing will change.
---Dee on 9/22/05

I would say to you drop him and wait on our Lord to bring your perfect match, a guy who will be everything to you and who will only see you, for the love he has for you. This guy your with has no respect for you and he has already betrayed you so are you going to let him continue to use you for his convience "OR" are you going to tell him get lost.
---Br_Francis on 9/21/05

AFTER he revives from where you get in a good sucker punch, drop him like a bad transmission! (j/k about punching him)
He is not respecting you now, marriage wouldn't change that. He sounds like a real piece of work!
---NVBarbara on 9/21/05

Kick him to the curb quickly. This man is emotionally and verbally abusing you.That can only escalate and will most likely turn to physical abuse later on. You deserve better. Get out now and don't listen to him when he tries to make excuses. he will try to get you to stay in the relationship and even make you feel quilty. For your safety get out now!!!!!
---ann_G on 9/20/05

Absolutely Not! Get rid of this man quickly. How could he love you and disrespect you like he does? A man who has a cheating heart now will still have it if you marry him. Respect yourself for the unique creation of God that you are and look for someone who loves God first, he will then love and treat you as God would have you be treated. Don't settle for less than God's very best for you. Never make excuses for anyone's bad behavior.
---Tsuanne on 9/20/05

do you have a personal relationship with Jesus? if you do you want a man who loves God before you,, because when you marry, Jesus Christ should be the head,, the Bible states, husbands love your wife as Christ loves the Church,, if hes looking at women, hes sure not looking to Christ
---michele on 9/20/05

Back off! If he does this flirting now, it will only get worse after marriage. Don't make the mistake of thinking you can change him.
---WIVV on 9/19/05

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Do not marry him & please break up with him immediately! Marriage will NOT change him! You deserve better than that!
---Melissa on 9/19/05

These are all good answers. Listen with your head instead of your heart, this boy is telling you something. He doesn't respect you or he wouldn't be saying other women are attractive but you aren't. I have known men who want a wife that is not physically attractive to other men, thinking she won't be inclined to cheat on him. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, find someone who can appreciate your inner beauty. God bless.
---Nan on 9/19/05

Run as fast as you can run and then....wait for God to send you the man he has chosen for you.
---Dee on 9/19/05

firstly, a man who flirts and looks at other women as he does can be the type to cheat on you and have affairs later. Men are kindest and try harder to please you before marrying you so that you will marry them. After marrying thier true colors come out. I believe you are seeing true colors already.
Who cares if he is handsome? Looks to not make a marraige. Dump him before he ruins your life. Thier are many single mother's in this world all because thier b/f's or husbands looked at another.
---Marla on 9/19/05

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The fact that you find him "handsome" won't cut it! Remember committment is what counts! I don't see it. Keep looking ELSEWHERE!
---Pierr7958 on 9/19/05

Hold out for someone who cherishes you for the external and the internal. Love is more than just words. And he is saying some words that indicates he really does not.
---Cam on 9/19/05

Drop him like a bad habit.
---Annie on 9/19/05

If he behaves that way before you are married, I can only imagine with disgust how he will be after a couple of years of marriage. run, run run, run, run
---shira_5965 on 9/19/05

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Why would you want to marry somebody who puts you down....
We are to edify one each other up not knock the other person down...
tell him to have a blessed life and move on...
---pam on 9/19/05

How is your self-esteem? Seems to me like it might be a good idea to strengthen your own self value. No one deserves to have a "boyfriend" treat them like that! You definately deserve someone who only has eyes & a heart for YOU!!! Trust God to bring you the right man... don't settle for this guy.
---Marilee on 9/19/05

Your boyfriend is being disrespectful towards you by what he is saying. If you don't wanted to be treated that way, my suggestion is to break it off and look for the one who will call you beautiful.
---Deni on 9/19/05

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