Don't Want To Go To Church
I don't want to go back to my church. I work the nursery, been sick, went back last Sunday because I'm better. Parents( these people are my friends) kicked me out and were very rude to me, because they thought I was still sick, though I told them I wasn't. What should I do? I'm very hurt over this.
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---Melissa on 9/20/05
Helpful Blog Vote (12)
The best reason not to go to church is that you don't have to be accountable to anyone and you can live your life as you wish.
---John.usa on 3/13/11|
IMO.Church is to gather people to garnish their hard earned money and manipulate the teachings from thousands of years ago,that have changed through translation and a greed to control the masses. The only way to the father is through Jesus a church will do nothing except enforce belief upon u rather then encourage u to find the truth through knowledge. Don't be fooled into by other people's interpretations of the bible, its stories or your own belief because like u like me like everyone they are imperfect and corruptible. Gather as much knowledge form as many sources as u can and process that all through ur heart and ur mind will find the truth. Church is when two or more people discuss God, we are at church right now :) bless and peace.
---Me on 3/12/11|
I have run into rude and bad behavior from fellow Christians and even though prayed for help and guidance I finally gave up. I call it the C & J effect when you don't want to be around bad people. I don't blame you for not wanting to go back. It's too painful
---cjmybad on 3/3/11|
Don't let people make you anything. Allow the Spirit of God to define who you are. When we allow others to make us, we bow our knee to them and give them more power in our lives than God. God believes and believes in you. If no one else ever does, isn't He enough?
---Linda on 2/6/11|
"Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is, but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching." Hebrews 10:25
Does not add if you 'feel like it' or 'if you want to' or if the kids don't complain about going. Just go.
---Harold on 2/5/11|
did anywhere in the bible jesus told you to attend any church, if not then you must check it out what is the meaning of the church, you don't do your own way
---simon on 2/4/11|
Steve--To a normal mother, the well-being of her child takes prcedence over everything!
( you may not like it, but it's a fact of life) She will be concerned with 1) Preaching the Gospel 2) Strengthening Believers... ONLY if she feels her child/children are safe. Caring for her children is her primary role and God given responsibility until her children can care for themselves.
---Donna66- on 2/3/11|
John: 'Obviously they thought their children were not safe. That take presidence over everything.'
No it does not
The church is for two reasons, and safety of children cannot override those
1) Preaching the Gospel
2) Strengthening Beleivers
---Steve on 2/1/11|
I was once asked not to attend (a church youth group) after returning from an area that had had a lot of swine flu.
It hurt, yes, but after ten days they felt I must be OK by then!
But what helped me was that they (the youth group leaders) were very kind in asking me - if they had been rude, I might have moved to another youth group!
---Jennifer on 2/1/11|
John: 'hepatitos, TB, Aids, Swine Flu'
Only TB and Swine flu can be transmitted in a church setting! Hepatitis and Aids cannot
I had a similar problem, when I retorned from China after the SARS issue (8 years ago) - I was asked to wait some time before going to Church, just in case. I was not very happy, but I understood their concerns
---Peter on 2/1/11|
The behavior of these people is not only rude & inappropriate, but unloving & not "Christ-like" in the least. I would look for a church with more love & acceptance. It has been said at my church that the church is not a country club, but a hospital for the hurting. Yes, you can know someone is a christian by their love (I John). Also, have you thought about volunteering in a different way?
---Hope5979 on 1/30/11|
Melissa, Your blog does not contain all the facts and we are only hearing your side of the story.
What reason did they give you?
Do you have a serious contagious disease that could affect their children. hepatitos, TB, Aids, Swine, Flu etc.
If you truely want help we would need their side and know what you have. You make it sound like you had a cold and it was over but they kicked you out. I think there is more to the story.
Obviously they thought their children were not safe. That take presidence over everything.
Try to give us more of their side.
---John on 1/28/11|
I don't want to go to church either, I Get to go.
---Harold on 1/25/11|
Melissa-- Forgive them and go back to church (but not the nusery until they want you to). Rudeness hurts, yet it's something we have all displayed to others at some time or another... often it is just thoughtlessness.
Think of the rudeness people showed Jesus!
But He forgave them...He can help you forgive and get over this, too.
---Donna66 on 1/25/11|
Melissa hon, please take it easy. Don't be so sensitive.I am reading some of your comments to others on this blog and you seem very high strung and sensitive.Develop your sense of humor also. You seem too dry and humorless.And the reason you are hurt is( I don't know)these people did not contact you or show love to you while you were out ill.When you returned they still did not say anyting to acknowledge your illness. This offended you.
---Robyn on 1/25/11|
I totally understand your hurt, but they would the exact thing in a regular school.
They did not respond in a loving perhaps joking way, but rather blunt and that is what hurt you feelings. Christians really need to take a 101 how to talk to others.
They can be at times the worst communicators in the world.
---vivian on 1/24/11|
Sometimes we can look at these times as the times when we are supposed to acknowledge their point of view. When parents want to protect their kids they'll knock the pope over.
I'd just thank God He must have wanted you in the adult service.
If it keeps bothering you - tell someone your hurt or it will fester.
You have no choice - you MUST forgive!
smile bc He didn't ask you to like it
---Andrea on 9/9/07|
I would not bother with these people other than to expose their rude unloving behavior. They might have been nice about it and even showed concern for your health. That behavior is unacceptable and unless there is something very great holding you to that place, it sounds like a place to leave. You will know them by their fruits.
---jody_martinj on 9/9/07|
Don't take things so personally man things like this get in and ruin a church because you are taking offense that doesn't need to be there
---Jesse on 9/9/07|
With friends like this who needs enemies. And they will know you are christians by their Love, 1 Corinthians 13 If you are not seeing love in that church GET OUT!
---Cynthia_1 on 3/7/07|
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They shouldn't kick you out. Maybe you should speak to the person in charge of the nursury re-assuring them you are better. They are looknig after the health of thier children, however maybe the orginizer can re-assign you to work again another Sunday to make sure you are 100% better.
---candice on 3/7/07|
First of all, rudeness is not acceptable under any circumstances. My question to you would be: Have these people treated you badly in the past or just this once? If they make a habit of it, I would say they are acting in a very un-Christian way and I would find another church. If it was a one-time incident, I would try to put it behind me. Maybe they will find it in their hearts to apologize.
---Nan on 9/23/05|
Elder, first of all, they rudely told me to leave. They did not ask. I was not rude. You were not there, and you do not know me, so what you said was wrong. Second, my doctor told me I was okay to be around people. I was just a little stuffed up still. I never go to church or anywhere else if I am sick.
---Melissa on 9/22/05|
When my kids started school I would keep them home if they were ill with something infectious. However many other mums did not do this when their children were ill. Consequently the illnesses would go round and round for ages with my children getting these things a second or third time from those who still brought the germs to school. I used to get cross about this but to no avail. Perhaps the mums you are talking about feel a little bit how I felt then and just think 'please keep your germs to yourself'.
---Paulette on 9/22/05|
Melissa, One of the hardest things for us as christians is to get our feelings off of our shoulders. As has been stated, go to the people who you have these feelings against and explain to them how they "hurt" your feelings with their actions and reconcile with them, then GO BACK TO CHURCH!
---tommy3007 on 9/22/05|
I think that the only one who saw you "getting kicked out" was you.
I also think that a sick person sharing an illness in the work place, church or anywhere else is selfish.
The "rudeness" of these people was in their concern for their children.
Maybe you were the rude one for making them make that choice.
Think about your part and you will see why they ASKED (not kicked) you to not be with the class that time.
---Elder on 9/22/05|
It takes a while to get over acute bronchitis, so even if you weren't contagious, your voice may have still been hoarse and raspy. I'm sorry they hurt your feelings, but I can't fault them for trying to protect their little ones. Try to see it from their point of view and forgive them.
---Allie on 9/21/05|
Melissa, Do not norture your hurt. Be forgiving even if they have not asked for forgiveness. Think of Jesus! I am praying for you to so that the pain be removed from your heart."Heavenly Father, please heal Melissa physically and emotionally. For your own Glory, I pray and ask this, in Jesus name. Amen."
---Bebet3754 on 9/20/05|
What I had was acute bronchitis. I am not contagous anymore. I spoke to the head of the nursery and she okayed me to go back. They were rude by the way they spoke to me, and acted toward me. I understand they were concerned about their kids. I have been in prayer about this since it happened.
---Melissa on 9/20/05|
Melissa, I understand you. I know you like to serve the Lord by teaching and caring for those kids in the nursery. But you have been sick, thus, I understand the parents' reaction over your presence. If you were not well, as you claim to be, then there is a possibility that you would infect those kids. Please, Melissa, don't get too hurt! Understand the parents' reactions. Remember that Jesus received more "rudeness" than those parents had given you.
---Bebet3754 on 9/20/05|
I would recommend praying, followed by forgiveness and returning to church. Jesus, I am sure, had his feelings hurt many times.
---Annie on 9/20/05|
Your friends may not have meant to hurt your feelings. They were just concerned about keeping their kids well. What did they do that was rude? Also, the sickness may have made a difference there is a big difference between strep and the sniffles.
---Annie on 9/20/05|
If they are your friends, you call them up and just tell them you were hurt by the way they treated you. Dialogue with them and see if you can work this out.
---Madison on 9/20/05|
There is never an excuse for rudeness, but maybe the parents thought you looked or acted sick even though you said you felt better. Perhaps they were being protective of their children, fearing that you had a virus or illness that would be passed on. Approach them again when you're completely well & ask them to explain.
---Nan on 9/20/05|
Are they worried because you have had something very contagious? This is the only reason that I can think of that would make mums react like you describe. If this is the case please don't be offended by them. Try and put yourself in their position. They are probably just worried sick that you are still not 100% better and fear that their children could come down with what you had. It sounds as though they were not too tactful in the way they handled the situation. Perhaps you could speak with the pastor.
---Xanthi on 9/20/05|