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Mother-In-Law Is A Witch

I hate my husband so much. He worships his mom and he wants me to do the same. I would do it only if she wasn't such a witch. She is the most evil woman I've seen in my life. She is trying to ruin our lives by interfering all the time.

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 ---sheila on 3/21/06
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Darlene, good to see you here. write me in my mail and tell me how you are and how your husband is doing. I have wondered about you many times. I honestly think my daughter in law don't know how to act any other way. her mom was very abusive and her step dad would come home from work and make her clean the dirt from between his toes. her mom would destroy her room and make her clean it then destroy it again. she works as an rn and is going to school for her nurse practioner and keeps her house spotless. she just isn't much aware when people are around. her and my son is out of church and both need their hearts mended.
---shira4368 on 2/16/13

Shira very well said and I agree. Some men do go overboard about their mothers and fail to move from Mama's Boy to husband. I have to wonder though how anyone hates a husband when he is doing what he was brought up to do,love his mother. What needs to be done is use wisdom in the situation,follow the Bible,pray your husband will love you as much as her and treat you that well. If you will hold your anger and not let jealousy rule your actions,give your Mother-in-law respect,you will let yourself be a lot happier,give it all to God. God can bring peace in the midst of the storm. You can't. You can change you,thats all.
---Darlene_1 on 2/16/13

This question was asked 21.03.06, revived 01.01.08, revived again 09.30.10, and now 01.15.13. Sheila has made no comment since asking this question SEVEN years ago so is anything to be gained by directing a question AT Sheila all these years later?

Francis, I don't think Sheila is coming back to tell you which kind of 'witch' she meant and I think we should just accept that she DID NOT LIKE her mother-in-law.
---Rita_H on 1/22/13

God knew marriage and family was in His divine plan. to abuse marriage is a slap in our Fathers face. God endorsed a man as leaving his mother to cling to a wife. mothers should never put their noses into their childrens marriage. they will make their own mistakes just like we did. wives are to love their husbands and husbands are to love their wives as Christ loves the church. things would turn around in the world if everyone would obey that little verse.
---shira4368 on 1/22/13

You write, "I HATE MY HUSBAND SO MUCH." If you hate your husband and your mother in law, are you following Christ? and are you obeying God's command to love? You need counseling. You need to return to scripture. You need to go to

1 Peter 3:5
For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands.

1 John 4:20
Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen.
---bike on 1/20/13

francis, she is neither. she is a gripeing, fussing, nagging and screaming. I feel so bad for my little grandson.
---shira4368 on 1/19/13

I would do it only if she wasn't such a witch.
---sheila on 3/21/06

What type of witch is she
A: A nose twitching witch
B: A broomstick flying witch
C: Finger twirling witch
---francis on 1/19/13

Sheila: Do you mean literally a witch, or just an unpleasant woman?

Lets separate the two
---Peter on 1/19/13

Shira4368, you are so right! The neighbors I send'em food alot
one night they woke me up angry, 1a.m. for what? The old man said "we don't want nothing from you no more! it really shock me! say"she hates you!" they being convicted by the Holy Ghost! He look down ashamed talk to me like that! They hear me playing & praying in the morning & days. Her dad is day I watch out so nobody break in his apt. I share good preaching on in the mornings! Some really " spiritfilled" on fire people in Oregon or Washington State. They send you mp3 tapes videos free! Never ask donation.God bless you sister.How is the brother at your church the daughter in Iraq? Keep them in prayers!
---ELENA on 1/18/13

Hello, everybody I had a terrible problem.A guy look me up on the web/ guess needed legal/prison felon, got mad because I will NOT help him..He got mad went into my android.This is ELENA,had to get new e- mails, change everything in my fon.God been good. A neighbor son took me to go get food, supplies.
found old friends/ christians, pentecostal.They going to be praying & start help me get out or pray for me here.
---ELENA on 1/18/13

thanks elena. some people don't know how to say thank you and therefore I am tolerant. I have a son in law who is grateful and a daughter in law that is not. I have babysat for her at a last minute call.
---shira4368 on 1/18/13

Before I forget Shira4368, Myself use to baby sit for my daughter muslim husband ( the child by the wife #1) never met her but she never said thankyou for keeping her son for weeks on end.He was a wpnderfull little boy! He said " now what am I suppose to call you? You not my grandma.. I said just call me ELENA. :) smile! Actually, he turn pretty good.. a police officer!
---ELENA on 1/17/13

Elena thank u for the sweet words. I am with u I just keep quiet and keep doing what I've been doing. I also supported them for 6 months when my son changed jobs.
---Shira4368 on 1/17/13

DearShira4368,bless you, although we have never met face to face, truly believe you would help anybody that have a half mind of sense, she should be help you! That one thing I got along fabulous with the mothers in law.When things went down hill I still sent her $ for needed food & things and the only one who ever asks bout me his baby sister.His mother had cancer so, I remain silent not bring them too much grief. God bless you sister. Keep the faith for you grandson.bless his lill of Jesus! ELENA
---ELENA on 1/17/13

Hate brings bitterness and bitterness destroys the one who holds it.

Although your plight is interesting.

You must have been asleep during your courtship to not recognize a serious red-flag, however it is all in your head because your mother-in-law did not change into this "evil" person, you did, because the hate you hold for your husband would cloud the perception you have of your mother-in-law.

It would be you who is ruining your marriage. Seek counseling instead of empty lying rantings.
---Follower_of_Christ on 1/16/13

I'd be curious to know what the MIL has to say about sheila.

And I wonder how the husband feels about all this.

There's a saying: Two women can't even share the same kitchen, how can they share the same man?

Glory to Jesus Christ!
---Cluny on 1/16/13

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my daughter in law don't like me either. I bought her and my grandson a laptop and never even got a thanks. I have baby sat for her and when she picks him up she blows the horn. my son ask her to help me move and she gave him a dirty look. she talked down my church so now my grandson won't go with me to church anymore. she don't take him either. the only time I hear from her and my grandson is when she wants something. I gave her my freezer with lots of frozen veggies that that was frozen fresh. who is the witch now?
---shira4368 on 1/16/13

You poor thing! In the first place humans are not suppose to worship anything or anyone. We are to only worship, honor, praise, glorify, reference,bow to, talk to, and listen to the One, true, living God....Watch out for that hate! In God's eyes, it constitutes MURDER.
---pat on 1/15/13

You are not alone. The best is to limit contact and be exceedingly nice to her. It doesnt help to lower yourself to her witchly level
---sonali on 1/15/13

i feel you lady, that's my mother in lwa does and it's unfortunate that my husband refuses to see the reality of thing and always blames me for everything that goes wrong between me and his mother. i wrote comments on facebook regarding that calling her a witch and he saw my comments and he is saw mad at me right now. i was not aware that he would read my comments but he did through a friend.
---bongi on 9/30/10

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I do know who is using my name.

I don't write posts for sympathy or attention. Imitation can be a form of flattery, in this case, it is false.

Michelle MMR
---Michelle on 1/1/08

My husband's mother and father passed away.
My husband watched his father drown as he stood on the shore. His mother passed away from illness.
I did not have the opportunity to meet them.

If my Minlaw was alive and difficult, I would fast and pray for a better relationship and show her love and kindness.

Michelle MMR
---Michelle on 1/1/08

If you can say those words, "I hate my husband, I hate his mother, she is a witch" are headed for spiritual shipwreck. It may be slowly, but hatred for family members will destroy your relationships and eventually with God.

God tells us to pray for our "enemies", those who use us. Forgiveness is a gift that will save your life. It is far more important than prophesying.

God says if we don't forgive, He will not forgive us.

---Michelle on 1/1/08

Your husband has an obligation to you 1st. It says so in the Bible itself. If he does not follow this, then he is out of order and the trouble with your MIL will continue. He must put her in her place and you must request he does this immediately. She won't stop until she breaks you up, especially if not challenged. My husband and I are peacefully estranged from his evil, demented mom. We have great peace now and our marriage is flourishing without her evil inlfuence. I wish you peace and strength.
---Michelle on 12/30/07

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Shiela6)Cont.. Often, they have not experienced serious incidences in early life which have tinted their feelings and behavior and made them rather ineffective in their outlook and capacity to accept love and give love. They do not possess the same fears, shames or hurts that some do and therefore do not even give thought to them. The great part of this for you is that once healed,you will always understand women like yourself and be in a position to help them:) God bless you!I am praying
---jody on 10/16/07

3Sheila) There are not too many Christian professionals out there who can take you through this so you may need to go it on your own. Better just you and God. You must not dwell long in sympathy but experience the painful memories and let GOD HEAL them by forgiving the offender. This forgiveness is a GIFT from God in actuality. So pray in that manner. For Him to grant you forgiveness. Don't rush and do not be hard on yourself if this is a slow process.
---jody on 10/16/07

4Shiela) It is very important to remember to it is not your Husband you Hate or your Mother in Law and if you allow your thinking to get out of control, you will undermine these relationships as has been your pattern and will push them out of your life which is exactly what you do NOT want. You need your husband and you do not want to push him away which you are doing. Try to tame the tongue for now and go to God. I Get prof help. I know you are angry at me by now but try to re-read this:)
---jody on 10/16/07

Sheila 1)wow! Hate,witch,evil. Hear those words. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks is what the Bible teaches. If your eye is dark than all that you see is dark. Noone on earth can ruin a christ centered marriage. The center of a marriage needs to be love. You do not know love. You feel hate and need healing. If you haven't known Jesus in your life, you need to meet Him. If you have known Him, You need to rededicate to Him and seek Him first in your life and all else will fall together.
---jody on 10/16/07

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Shiela 2) I have a special heart for you. I would like to continue. This hatered that you feel is not knew and is at its root jealously. It happened at a very young age and is from some type of abandonment issue. I don't know what happened but you do. Think back. It has affected all of your relationships so that you haven't been able to keep friends. You are a sad person and you cry. God wants to heal this but you have to let Him in and you have to remember painful things that he will show you.
---jody on 10/16/07

I believe you need to seek God and ask Him to change your spirit towards her and your husband. I don't understand, if you hate your husband so much because he honors his mother then why did you marry him? If this part of him bothered you so much you should have thought this through before getting married to him. In conclusion, you dug your own grave, babe!
---Shana on 10/15/07

I to have a similar situation. Except I am not married yet. my boyfried is the only son and last child. His mother is aggresively insists on being involved in and dictating the terms of our relationship and his life. He doesnt say much which aggrevates even more. I believe that the key is your husband. If he doesnt stand up to his mother is not respecting your relationship. I would discuss this with him.
---Lisa on 8/24/07

I remember having similar feelings toward my mother-in-law many years ago. Marital therapy helped my husband see the need to "leave and cleave" as it says in Genesis.
---Madison on 6/2/07

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Through thererapy and spiritual intervention, I am an abuse victor, as is my youngest sister.

Holy Spirit helped me piece my mom's past together; she was abused by a male. That caused her to be a male hater, among having psychotic episodes.

I tell this because you may have similar things as I did, needing healing and spiritual discernment. MIL may be mentally ill, manipulative, or both. However both of you having the same depression is a signal to look in the spiritual arena, also.
---John_T on 4/8/06

We moved 1,500 miles away and just went back to visit, and my husband and I have been in a depression since - fighting off and on. She has a really negative effect. Moving away doesn't help - just concentrates the negativity into a short timeframe, extremely overwhelming after months of freedom. I have considered divorce just so I don't have to deal with her. I don't know what to do. Moving away only works if you'll never have to see or speak to her again. Good luck figuring something out!
---MyMILismeantoo on 4/8/06

I agree as above your husband and yourself need to go to some couples counseling through your church. As far as the mother in law goes, after many years of trying to have mine understand and failing, I just keep praying for her to recognize our personal relationship. If she is really out of line I'll call her on it, otherwise I just keep sending her emails and talking about Jesus with her so maybe she will come to know him and be such a better person for it.
---Rhonda on 3/27/06

This posting is a classic example of the conflict between two women over a man: the complaining wife and the evil mother-in-law! You hate your husband and your mother-in-law is a witch. What do you want us to do? Listen to your woes? Okay, we are listening! But I guess you have to do some drastic "re-orientation of yourself". You are in love with and married to a man who worships his mother. Start from this initial condition and think deeply from this point.
---Linda6546 on 3/23/06

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Worship nothing on earth nor in heaven but GOD, your creator.
---Thomas on 3/22/06

sheila, A few of questions. How do you define "interfering all the time"? Is the issue really that your husband "worships his mom" ? or, is it that he isn't worshipping you? You stated you "hate" your husband. Sometimes we "hate" what we cannot control. Before you try to fix your husband and his mother, what are you doing to deal with your obvious rage concerning this? What are your motives? And, where is your relationship with Jesus in all of this?
---daphn8897 on 3/22/06

Continued: an example of how I handled a hateful remark of motherinlaw. I was a new 16 year old bride,there were 4 other daughters-in-law and others visiting her. She said " She baited the old cow to get the calf. I answered " I had the calf before the old cow knew I was in the pasture." Everyone laughed,I defused the sting of her remark. Learn to answer so you shut her up without being hateful. Most important, don't suffer in silence, be honest, but let the Love of God direct your answers.
---Darlene_1 on 3/22/06

Continued; Important! Never allow him to go around her without you. Always go with him,take control of your lives by not giving her a chance to work on him without you. Be sweet to her. Show him,you being nice when she isn't nice to you. Check yourself,is there jealousy from you about his relationship with her? Walk in the love of the Lord,put away malice or hatred, that hurts you as much as she does. Be wise,you don't have to be mean as her to get your point across,you won't accept her interference.
---Darlene_1 on 3/22/06

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Remember hubby worships his mother and anything you do to keep them apart will hurt him as well as her. Be honest with her and let the chips fall where they may. When she starts to interfere, tell her firmly but kindly; "Thank you for the advice but it is best for us to conduct our life how we want it to be. You directed your life and marriage now it is our time to do that for ours.". Tell hubby you won't put up with her interference and if he wants a marriage with you ,he better back you up.
---Darlene_1 on 3/22/06


Otherwise, the marriage is doomed.
---John_T on 3/22/06

You should respect thy mother& father (includes inlaws) no you shouldn't worship them for only Jehovah God is to be worshipped, however tell your husband nicely how you feel. Families use to be so close a century ago where both families got along, what ever happened in the past 100 yrs?
---candice on 3/22/06

Are you both saved? You and your husband need to go see a good Christian councilor ASAP! Then you both need to confront his mom, in the wisdom of the Lord. This is very serious and not going to be easy. Then there's the hate issue and do you have children? There is a lot at stake here, so pray, pray, pray! Only JESUS can heal your family!
---Peter on 3/22/06

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You cannot change your husband or mother in law, but you can pray for them and see what God does. He usually begins with us, changing our own hearts. It is destructive to you and others to hate your husband...please pray about this. Also, even if your mother in law was different/better, you should never worship anyone or anything except for God.
---christina on 3/22/06

You hate your hubby? Isnt that extreme? Have you communicated to him how you feel? Your hubby loves his mom; you just have to find a way of tolerating and respecting her after all she gave birth to that man you now call your husband. If you can, live at a distance where she cant come visiting every morning and evening!
---glrs on 3/22/06

I would talk my husband into moving far away from her. I wouldn't worship anyone, especially mother in law. I would do everything to get along when I had to, but I would also stay away. So many mother's in law interfere with their offsprings marriages. I feel sorry for the son or daughter in law.
---shira on 3/22/06

I agree your husband married you, he is one flesh with you; he did not marry his mother, and he does not become one flesh with his mother. You and your husband need to be in agreement to confront the mother and command her to stop her destructive meddling, else if she will not behave then you both will sever ties with her to preserve your marriage. And together stand firm up to her and make sure she understands her offense will not be accepted.
---Eloy on 3/22/06

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